Confession Time! ((ABSOLUTELY NO JUDGEMENT))
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(Hugs)orangesmartie wrote: »I drove 200 miles last night to end my relationships. I talked a lot. Couldn't bring myself to say the words. I didn't think it would be possible for my heart to be so broken again.
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@orangesmartie, the same as everyone else said...so incredibly sorry. Sending hugs. Be strong! Head up, chin up.0
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@orangesmartie we're all here if you need to vent.0
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@orangesmartie I'm so sorry
I'll be thinking of you today. I know how hard it can be to do that. 0 -
@orangesmartie I am so very sorry for your pain. It is never easy to make that decision. You did what you felt was best for all concerned I am sure but that doesn't stop the pain. Hugs for you.0
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@orangesmartie
(((((Hugs)))))
There is rarely easy to end a relationship. It is heartbreaking and painful. I wish I had better words to say it. You are going to come out the other side of this time of heartbreak and pain stronger, more confident, and eventually ready for a relationship that will be better for you. I'm so sorry and many hugs.
Edited because I can't type on a phone.0 -
I feel like a jerk posting my happy update after orangesmartie’s post but this morning was a very happy day
I finally hit goal! I’ve lost 40 lbs (which is embarrassing to say, admitting I had that much to lose) and that feels amazing. I’m actually slightly below my weight before DS#1.
I’m still not happy with the way I look, and I think my next goal is to lose another 5-8 lb. I’m 5’4.5 and 133.5 as of this morning, and I think I would like to maintain around 125-128. I’m not sure yet, because my body changed a lot after DS#2. My hips were a lot smaller- I have a closet full of 4s and Small shirts that used to fit me at 135. Now some of the Smalls fit and I’m in a 6. My 4s are still too tight. I know myself and I’ll keep setting my goals lower and lower so I’m not “officially in maintenance” (which scares me, tbh).
DH told me to stop overthinking it, take today “off” dieting and just celebrate reaching goal. I got a Starbucks iced coffee this morning; does that count as celebrating?
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orangesmartie wrote: »I drove 200 miles last night to end my relationships. I talked a lot. Couldn't bring myself to say the words. I didn't think it would be possible for my heart to be so broken again.
Oh my goodness, I am so sorry. Sending thoughts and prayers your way.0 -
xLoveLikeWinterx wrote: »I feel like a jerk posting my happy update after orangesmartie’s post but this morning was a very happy day
I finally hit goal! I’ve lost 40 lbs (which is embarrassing to say, admitting I had that much to lose) and that feels amazing. I’m actually slightly below my weight before DS#1.
I’m still not happy with the way I look, and I think my next goal is to lose another 5-8 lb. I’m 5’4.5 and 133.5 as of this morning, and I think I would like to maintain around 125-128. I’m not sure yet, because my body changed a lot after DS#2. My hips were a lot smaller- I have a closet full of 4s and Small shirts that used to fit me at 135. Now some of the Smalls fit and I’m in a 6. My 4s are still too tight. I know myself and I’ll keep setting my goals lower and lower so I’m not “officially in maintenance” (which scares me, tbh).
DH told me to stop overthinking it, take today “off” dieting and just celebrate reaching goal. I got a Starbucks iced coffee this morning; does that count as celebrating?
Congratulations to you! 40 pounds is quite a big deal!0 -
@orangesmartie so sorry.xx0
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xLoveLikeWinterx wrote: »
I finally hit goal! I’ve lost 40 lbs (which is embarrassing to say, admitting I had that much to lose) and that feels amazing. I’m actually slightly below my weight before DS#1.
Congratulations that is wonderful! Way to go. Yay for you!0 -
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xLoveLikeWinterx wrote: »I feel like a jerk posting my happy update after orangesmartie’s post but this morning was a very happy day
I finally hit goal! I’ve lost 40 lbs (which is embarrassing to say, admitting I had that much to lose) and that feels amazing. I’m actually slightly below my weight before DS#1.
I’m still not happy with the way I look, and I think my next goal is to lose another 5-8 lb. I’m 5’4.5 and 133.5 as of this morning, and I think I would like to maintain around 125-128. I’m not sure yet, because my body changed a lot after DS#2. My hips were a lot smaller- I have a closet full of 4s and Small shirts that used to fit me at 135. Now some of the Smalls fit and I’m in a 6. My 4s are still too tight. I know myself and I’ll keep setting my goals lower and lower so I’m not “officially in maintenance” (which scares me, tbh).
DH told me to stop overthinking it, take today “off” dieting and just celebrate reaching goal. I got a Starbucks iced coffee this morning; does that count as celebrating?
Congratulations on the goal. That is great. Instead of losing, would you think about reshaping with exercise? I know our bodies change so much from before kids, but maybe that would help.0 -
orangesmartie wrote: »I drove 200 miles last night to end my relationships. I talked a lot. Couldn't bring myself to say the words. I didn't think it would be possible for my heart to be so broken again.
Serious hugs, and repetitive mention of how we're all here if you need us.0 -
NSV - sort of - after two weekends in a row of 3 - 5 days with SO I'm still at a good weight. Dating a foodie while traveling and with my food intolerances is challenge. I eat much smaller portions that he does but I do get far more dairy than I would otherwise have and always risk a cross contamination of gluten. Thus I am happy that I am still in a good range. Right now I'm 4 - 7 pounds from my target but as long as I'm slowly moving down or staying the same and not moving up I'm good. Due to my work travel, SO's work travel and SO's child custody, and SO's vacation time it will be a few weeks until SO and I are in the same place at the same time again. It MAY be as long as six weeks. That will be tough if it is that long. He's amazing about calling every night but it is still not easy. I'm invited along his vacation (which is a family reunion and also another bike event, and other times) but other obligations make that not practical. The upside of the far longer than usual time is that I will have a bit of a stretch to lose a bit more and focus on other goals (such as a Princess Bride Dress). The last time he was gone longer than his usual 8 - 10 days he came back and deepened his commitment to me and said the love word for the first time. (We are taking it slow in a lot of ways). I do believe it will be a bugger for us to be away from each other so long but it is also a great test of our relationship. He will be around friends who have their wives or girlfriends with them so it may be a good mirror for him to see where he is at with us. We have not had a possible marriage talk and while I"m getting there, and do think we'd have long term combatibility and love and devotion we have not talked about it. In 1.5 years I don't have any concerns about his character, integrity, or kindness. I am not willing to settle in any way so this six weeks will be a good test of how we feel about each other and where the relationship is at.
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NSV-ish: I've made a decision. I'd set my goal at 115 (remember that I'm under 5'2"!), because that was my "normal" weight when I started college, but looking through pictures back then, I feel like I was just too thin. Not that I was ill-looking or anything like that, but it's not how I prefer to look. So, I've upped my goal weight by 10lbs to 125 and then plan to focus on recomping, rather than weight loss.
I'm 11lbs from a normal BMI, then 10 more to my new goal. This feels much more acheivable, and like a way better long-term goal. Yay!
Also, I've decided to force myself into making time for the gym despite homework. That should actually help me focus better when I'm doing the homework since I'll have less slacking off time.0 -
orangesmartie wrote: »@Susieq_1994 –yay. I’m glad you can walk again and got to go out for a bit. Congrats on the loss.
@peleroja –I’m so happy that you are able to go on the trip. It sounds like it will be amazing. I’m weird but I would kind of hope to be the only people on the tour haha.
@orangesmartie –Congrats on the weight loss. 67 lbs is AMAZING! Hope things are going ok…
@quiksylver296 –I’m still jealous you are going to the Oregon coast if that makes you feel better.
How are things with you froggy?
I was doing okay but now I'm dealing with some really bad depression. I couldn't stop crying last night so I didn't sleep too well. It's my TOM so that doesn't help of course.
How are you?
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NSV - sort of - after two weekends in a row of 3 - 5 days with SO I'm still at a good weight. Dating a foodie while traveling and with my food intolerances is challenge. I eat much smaller portions that he does but I do get far more dairy than I would otherwise have and always risk a cross contamination of gluten. Thus I am happy that I am still in a good range. Right now I'm 4 - 7 pounds from my target but as long as I'm slowly moving down or staying the same and not moving up I'm good. Due to my work travel, SO's work travel and SO's child custody, and SO's vacation time it will be a few weeks until SO and I are in the same place at the same time again. It MAY be as long as six weeks. That will be tough if it is that long. He's amazing about calling every night but it is still not easy. I'm invited along his vacation (which is a family reunion and also another bike event, and other times) but other obligations make that not practical. The upside of the far longer than usual time is that I will have a bit of a stretch to lose a bit more and focus on other goals (such as a Princess Bride Dress). The last time he was gone longer than his usual 8 - 10 days he came back and deepened his commitment to me and said the love word for the first time. (We are taking it slow in a lot of ways). I do believe it will be a bugger for us to be away from each other so long but it is also a great test of our relationship. He will be around friends who have their wives or girlfriends with them so it may be a good mirror for him to see where he is at with us. We have not had a possible marriage talk and while I"m getting there, and do think we'd have long term combatibility and love and devotion we have not talked about it. In 1.5 years I don't have any concerns about his character, integrity, or kindness. I am not willing to settle in any way so this six weeks will be a good test of how we feel about each other and where the relationship is at.
My boyfriend and I have been together 2.5 years. We didn't say "I love you" until 2 years in! After we both said it, we talked about how we both felt it much much sooner. We're in our 30s and I've been divorced, and I didn't want to rush anything. It's so meaningful now when we tell each other we love each other, because we know we really truly mean it.1 -
CountessKitteh wrote: »NSV-ish: I've made a decision. I'd set my goal at 115 (remember that I'm under 5'2"!), because that was my "normal" weight when I started college, but looking through pictures back then, I feel like I was just too thin. Not that I was ill-looking or anything like that, but it's not how I prefer to look. So, I've upped my goal weight by 10lbs to 125 and then plan to focus on recomping, rather than weight loss.
I'm 11lbs from a normal BMI, then 10 more to my new goal. This feels much more acheivable, and like a way better long-term goal. Yay!
Also, I've decided to force myself into making time for the gym despite homework. That should actually help me focus better when I'm doing the homework since I'll have less slacking off time.
It is interesting to see how our view of ourselves change along this path we have taken. I can't wait to see what I will consider a good weight for myself. I have a range in mind, but like you it may change the closer I get to it and the exercise I choose to get there. My body shape may be good at a higher weight than I think. Good for you!!0
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