MFP Personals
Replies
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Avocado_AS5 wrote: »Seeking a snuggle buddy with good hygiene who will do my laundry, feed me tacos, and share awesome memes and gif's with. Must text me "Good Morning Beautiful" daily before 8 a.m. and tell me I'm pretty a minimum of 5 times per week. Misc duties requested but not required include opening too tight jar lids, killing spiders, mowing the grass shirtless, changing the oil in my car, and playing with my hair.
....... would you settle for just taking the car to a mechanic for that oil change?
everything else is a cakewalk1 -
I'm just going to go back to this method of choosing that we used in elementary school. More of a gamble of being stuck with a dud this way, but at least it guaranteed you a definitive answer. Who's in?
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Avocado_AS5 wrote: »Seeking a snuggle buddy with good hygiene who will do my laundry, feed me tacos, and share awesome memes and gif's with. Must text me "Good Morning Beautiful" daily before 8 a.m. and tell me I'm pretty a minimum of 5 times per week. Misc duties requested but not required include opening too tight jar lids, killing spiders, mowing the grass shirtless, changing the oil in my car, and playing with my hair.
@Avocado_AS5, What do I get in exchange?0 -
Seeking 2 men. One aged 50-55, one aged 21-23. Realize from the get-go that my interest in you is purely for "research" purposes. This arrangement will not result in a relationship, I am using you purely out of curiosity.
I will be putting you through a number of "challenges" physically, intellectually and emotionally and will be comparing the two of you. You will be compensated accordingly, upon completion of my testing.
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Seeking 2 men. One aged 50-55, one aged 21-23. Realize from the get-go that my interest in you is purely for "research" purposes. This arrangement will not result in a relationship, I am using you purely out of curiosity.
I will be putting you through a number of "challenges" physically, intellectually and emotionally and will be comparing the two of you. You will be compensated accordingly, upon completion of my testing.
do any of the challenges involve catching cats in clown costumes? I dont feel that is my forte..0 -
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ParadigmShifter wrote: »Avocado_AS5 wrote: »Seeking a snuggle buddy with good hygiene who will do my laundry, feed me tacos, and share awesome memes and gif's with. Must text me "Good Morning Beautiful" daily before 8 a.m. and tell me I'm pretty a minimum of 5 times per week. Misc duties requested but not required include opening too tight jar lids, killing spiders, mowing the grass shirtless, changing the oil in my car, and playing with my hair.
@Avocado_AS5, What do I get in exchange?
You get to be my dude.
Nuff said.1 -
Avocado_AS5 wrote: »ParadigmShifter wrote: »Avocado_AS5 wrote: »Seeking a snuggle buddy with good hygiene who will do my laundry, feed me tacos, and share awesome memes and gif's with. Must text me "Good Morning Beautiful" daily before 8 a.m. and tell me I'm pretty a minimum of 5 times per week. Misc duties requested but not required include opening too tight jar lids, killing spiders, mowing the grass shirtless, changing the oil in my car, and playing with my hair.
@Avocado_AS5, What do I get in exchange?
You get to be my dude.
Nuff said.
.... and that should be enough for any fella, it damn sure should.1 -
OutOfUserName wrote: »Seeking 2 men. One aged 50-55, one aged 21-23. Realize from the get-go that my interest in you is purely for "research" purposes. This arrangement will not result in a relationship, I am using you purely out of curiosity.
I will be putting you through a number of "challenges" physically, intellectually and emotionally and will be comparing the two of you. You will be compensated accordingly, upon completion of my testing.
no 30s? fine then
Nothing wrong with 30's, mid-late 20's or 40's for that matter but I was aiming for as young as is legal, and not too close to my parents age.MrStabbems wrote: »Seeking 2 men. One aged 50-55, one aged 21-23. Realize from the get-go that my interest in you is purely for "research" purposes. This arrangement will not result in a relationship, I am using you purely out of curiosity.
I will be putting you through a number of "challenges" physically, intellectually and emotionally and will be comparing the two of you. You will be compensated accordingly, upon completion of my testing.
do any of the challenges involve catching cats in clown costumes? I dont feel that is my forte..
Sorry to say, this may not be the challenge for you then, cats and clowns most definitely will be involved in some capacity.Motorsheen wrote: »
Maybe for my next experiment...71-78 year old man vs a woman of any age0 -
LittleHearseDriver wrote: »Are you fertile?
Opps
that was meant for the pick up line thread. Lets see how many sperm donors I can catch over there.
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MFP Personals ?
Okay....
It's your choice:
Accept My Friend Requests........ Or The Dog Gets It !
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LittleHearseDriver wrote: »
Lets see how many sperm donors I can catch over there.LittleHearseDriver wrote: »Are you fertile?
Ha. I get it.0 -
LittleHearseDriver wrote: »Lets see how many sperm donors I can catch over there.
Probably all of them... LOL0 -
Avocado_AS5 wrote: »ParadigmShifter wrote: »Avocado_AS5 wrote: »Seeking a snuggle buddy with good hygiene who will do my laundry, feed me tacos, and share awesome memes and gif's with. Must text me "Good Morning Beautiful" daily before 8 a.m. and tell me I'm pretty a minimum of 5 times per week. Misc duties requested but not required include opening too tight jar lids, killing spiders, mowing the grass shirtless, changing the oil in my car, and playing with my hair.
@Avocado_AS5, What do I get in exchange?
You get to be my dude.
Nuff said.
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ParadigmShifter wrote: »Avocado_AS5 wrote: »ParadigmShifter wrote: »Avocado_AS5 wrote: »Seeking a snuggle buddy with good hygiene who will do my laundry, feed me tacos, and share awesome memes and gif's with. Must text me "Good Morning Beautiful" daily before 8 a.m. and tell me I'm pretty a minimum of 5 times per week. Misc duties requested but not required include opening too tight jar lids, killing spiders, mowing the grass shirtless, changing the oil in my car, and playing with my hair.
@Avocado_AS5, What do I get in exchange?
You get to be my dude.
Nuff said.
Points for the awesome gif! See, you're already ahead of the game!
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AlistairBernardNormal wrote: »Wanted: Man who will fulfill my every desire. Please note my desires change by the second so you must be adaptable. You must enjoy giving massages, grocery shopping, laundry, taking care of the kids, cooking, cleaning and fixing things. Also, only men named Kevin or Sam should apply.
This will only work out for me if you act like I'm an inconvenience every time I ask for the smallest favor.
I can do that!!
Perfect. BRB, ordering you flowers that you won't acknowledge or appreciate!0 -
Gal with two personalities seeks guy with two personalities. They all come out together it'll be a foursome!3
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Looking for someone with a positive attitude who can make me think my bad decisions are good ones
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If you can make this, your in.
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_har_T_Swallow wrote: »SEAHORSES4EVER wrote: »Looking for someone with a positive attitude who can make me think my bad decisions are good ones
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SEAHORSES4EVER wrote: »_har_T_Swallow wrote: »SEAHORSES4EVER wrote: »Looking for someone with a positive attitude who can make me think my bad decisions are good ones
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AlistairBernardNormal wrote: »AlistairBernardNormal wrote: »Wanted: Man who will fulfill my every desire. Please note my desires change by the second so you must be adaptable. You must enjoy giving massages, grocery shopping, laundry, taking care of the kids, cooking, cleaning and fixing things. Also, only men named Kevin or Sam should apply.
This will only work out for me if you act like I'm an inconvenience every time I ask for the smallest favor.
I can do that!!
Perfect. BRB, ordering you flowers that you won't acknowledge or appreciate!
Awwww. I could never ignore that. I think I have only gotten flowers once or twice that weren't birthday or apology flowers....
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AlistairBernardNormal wrote: »AlistairBernardNormal wrote: »Wanted: Man who will fulfill my every desire. Please note my desires change by the second so you must be adaptable. You must enjoy giving massages, grocery shopping, laundry, taking care of the kids, cooking, cleaning and fixing things. Also, only men named Kevin or Sam should apply.
This will only work out for me if you act like I'm an inconvenience every time I ask for the smallest favor.
I can do that!!
Perfect. BRB, ordering you flowers that you won't acknowledge or appreciate!
Awwww. I could never ignore that. I think I have only gotten flowers once or twice that weren't birthday or apology flowers....
I hate sorry flowers. Here have something beautiful and watch it die slowly like our relationship.6 -
SEAHORSES4EVER wrote: »AlistairBernardNormal wrote: »AlistairBernardNormal wrote: »Wanted: Man who will fulfill my every desire. Please note my desires change by the second so you must be adaptable. You must enjoy giving massages, grocery shopping, laundry, taking care of the kids, cooking, cleaning and fixing things. Also, only men named Kevin or Sam should apply.
This will only work out for me if you act like I'm an inconvenience every time I ask for the smallest favor.
I can do that!!
Perfect. BRB, ordering you flowers that you won't acknowledge or appreciate!
Awwww. I could never ignore that. I think I have only gotten flowers once or twice that weren't birthday or apology flowers....
I hate sorry flowers. Here have something beautiful and watch it die slowly like our relationship.
So.... sorry alcohol?2 -
This thread is hysterical.0
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SEAHORSES4EVER wrote: »AlistairBernardNormal wrote: »AlistairBernardNormal wrote: »Wanted: Man who will fulfill my every desire. Please note my desires change by the second so you must be adaptable. You must enjoy giving massages, grocery shopping, laundry, taking care of the kids, cooking, cleaning and fixing things. Also, only men named Kevin or Sam should apply.
This will only work out for me if you act like I'm an inconvenience every time I ask for the smallest favor.
I can do that!!
Perfect. BRB, ordering you flowers that you won't acknowledge or appreciate!
Awwww. I could never ignore that. I think I have only gotten flowers once or twice that weren't birthday or apology flowers....
I hate sorry flowers. Here have something beautiful and watch it die slowly like our relationship.
So.... sorry alcohol?
Enough so that I won't remember what you should be sorry for is perfect0 -
AlistairBernardNormal wrote: »AlistairBernardNormal wrote: »Wanted: Man who will fulfill my every desire. Please note my desires change by the second so you must be adaptable. You must enjoy giving massages, grocery shopping, laundry, taking care of the kids, cooking, cleaning and fixing things. Also, only men named Kevin or Sam should apply.
This will only work out for me if you act like I'm an inconvenience every time I ask for the smallest favor.
I can do that!!
Perfect. BRB, ordering you flowers that you won't acknowledge or appreciate!
Awwww. I could never ignore that. I think I have only gotten flowers once or twice that weren't birthday or apology flowers....
Billy, you are the best!
SEAHORSES4EVER wrote: »AlistairBernardNormal wrote: »AlistairBernardNormal wrote: »Wanted: Man who will fulfill my every desire. Please note my desires change by the second so you must be adaptable. You must enjoy giving massages, grocery shopping, laundry, taking care of the kids, cooking, cleaning and fixing things. Also, only men named Kevin or Sam should apply.
This will only work out for me if you act like I'm an inconvenience every time I ask for the smallest favor.
I can do that!!
Perfect. BRB, ordering you flowers that you won't acknowledge or appreciate!
Awwww. I could never ignore that. I think I have only gotten flowers once or twice that weren't birthday or apology flowers....
I hate sorry flowers. Here have something beautiful and watch it die slowly like our relationship.
Exactly! I don't want flowers because you screwed up. Flowers should be a sweet sentiment like you are thinking about someone, not that you are trying to buy yourself out of trouble. LAME
I agree with this! I don't want flowers as an I'm sorry. You better cook me dinner and clean up the kitchen afterwards, followed by *kitten* me senseless making me forget why I was mad at you 4 -
browneyedgirl749 wrote: »AlistairBernardNormal wrote: »AlistairBernardNormal wrote: »Wanted: Man who will fulfill my every desire. Please note my desires change by the second so you must be adaptable. You must enjoy giving massages, grocery shopping, laundry, taking care of the kids, cooking, cleaning and fixing things. Also, only men named Kevin or Sam should apply.
This will only work out for me if you act like I'm an inconvenience every time I ask for the smallest favor.
I can do that!!
Perfect. BRB, ordering you flowers that you won't acknowledge or appreciate!
Awwww. I could never ignore that. I think I have only gotten flowers once or twice that weren't birthday or apology flowers....
Billy, you are the best!SEAHORSES4EVER wrote: »AlistairBernardNormal wrote: »AlistairBernardNormal wrote: »Wanted: Man who will fulfill my every desire. Please note my desires change by the second so you must be adaptable. You must enjoy giving massages, grocery shopping, laundry, taking care of the kids, cooking, cleaning and fixing things. Also, only men named Kevin or Sam should apply.
This will only work out for me if you act like I'm an inconvenience every time I ask for the smallest favor.
I can do that!!
Perfect. BRB, ordering you flowers that you won't acknowledge or appreciate!
Awwww. I could never ignore that. I think I have only gotten flowers once or twice that weren't birthday or apology flowers....
I hate sorry flowers. Here have something beautiful and watch it die slowly like our relationship.
Exactly! I don't want flowers because you screwed up. Flowers should be a sweet sentiment like you are thinking about someone, not that you are trying to buy yourself out of trouble. LAME
I agree with this! I don't want flowers as an I'm sorry. You better cook me dinner and clean up the kitchen afterwards, followed by *kitten* me senseless making me forget why I was mad at you
lol are you leaking today?
I've only bought flowers once, that was when I proposed. I had them in the room downstairs for the morning.0 -
MrStabbems wrote: »browneyedgirl749 wrote: »AlistairBernardNormal wrote: »AlistairBernardNormal wrote: »Wanted: Man who will fulfill my every desire. Please note my desires change by the second so you must be adaptable. You must enjoy giving massages, grocery shopping, laundry, taking care of the kids, cooking, cleaning and fixing things. Also, only men named Kevin or Sam should apply.
This will only work out for me if you act like I'm an inconvenience every time I ask for the smallest favor.
I can do that!!
Perfect. BRB, ordering you flowers that you won't acknowledge or appreciate!
Awwww. I could never ignore that. I think I have only gotten flowers once or twice that weren't birthday or apology flowers....
Billy, you are the best!SEAHORSES4EVER wrote: »AlistairBernardNormal wrote: »AlistairBernardNormal wrote: »Wanted: Man who will fulfill my every desire. Please note my desires change by the second so you must be adaptable. You must enjoy giving massages, grocery shopping, laundry, taking care of the kids, cooking, cleaning and fixing things. Also, only men named Kevin or Sam should apply.
This will only work out for me if you act like I'm an inconvenience every time I ask for the smallest favor.
I can do that!!
Perfect. BRB, ordering you flowers that you won't acknowledge or appreciate!
Awwww. I could never ignore that. I think I have only gotten flowers once or twice that weren't birthday or apology flowers....
I hate sorry flowers. Here have something beautiful and watch it die slowly like our relationship.
Exactly! I don't want flowers because you screwed up. Flowers should be a sweet sentiment like you are thinking about someone, not that you are trying to buy yourself out of trouble. LAME
I agree with this! I don't want flowers as an I'm sorry. You better cook me dinner and clean up the kitchen afterwards, followed by *kitten* me senseless making me forget why I was mad at you
lol are you leaking today?
I've only bought flowers once, that was when I proposed. I had them in the room downstairs for the morning.
What if she had said NO?
There was 0% chance of that happening. Honestly, I had no nerves and no worries about anything.0
This discussion has been closed.
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