MFP Personals
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shortgirlsneedlovetoo wrote: »MrStabbems wrote: »shortgirlsneedlovetoo wrote: »MrStabbems wrote: »happilybrad wrote: »MrStabbems wrote: »happilybrad wrote: »LittleHearseDriver wrote: »happilybrad wrote: »Hi.
I'd like to take a ticket number and put my name on the list for an MFP girlfriend. Where do I fill out the paperwork?
Applications with recommendations can be sent to BigBootyJudy on Kik
You had me at your username.
I find LittleHearseDriver more arousing if I'm honest...
Pitched a tent just reading that.
Sure is a small tent though
That was the joke my love.
I was just saying to Brad I'd expect a 3 room tent perhaps @happilybrad
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I had another post that was the best that I've seen all day. *kitten* that, this just blew that post away. My new favorite post of the week! Awesome!browneyedgirl749 wrote: »I agree with this! I don't want flowers as an I'm sorry. You better cook me dinner and clean up the kitchen afterwards, followed by *kitten* me senseless making me forget why I was mad at you
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_notorious_ wrote: »_har_T_Swallow wrote: »if you're married, and you'd like to strengthen your relationship with your spouse (after a significant period of making them think something is wrong and driving them insane with paranoia and dread as you suddenly start keeping your phone face down and general sneakiness), then look no further!
some of the perks you'll get:
will tell you that you are pretty (and mean it!). won't get jealous. won't kiss and tell. won't really care about you or your problems with any regularity. will often ignore you for extended periods of time. will message you specifically when it's date night. will send the best memes and make you laugh.
What he said.
Only I have boobs.
Now that's funny.
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JasonRainboze wrote: »Want to someone who enjoys a BIG personality and a SMAll ego.
In inches..how BIG is this personality exactly
..Im asking for a friend 1 -
30ish, fat, depressed and married.....obviously a good time. Hmu2
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happilybrad wrote: »[
You had me at your username.MrStabbems wrote: »I find LittleHearseDriver more arousing if I'm honest...Nitroalley2 wrote: »Dear madam,
I was dissappointed to not be considered for a test drive for the position. However if there is a waiting list please kindly add me. I am known for patience and persistence.
Yours in faith
God yes.
Dang, I haven't seen this much action in a long time. This cat lady has still got it!1 -
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LittleHearseDriver wrote: »happilybrad wrote: »[
You had me at your username.MrStabbems wrote: »I find LittleHearseDriver more arousing if I'm honest...Nitroalley2 wrote: »Dear madam,
I was dissappointed to not be considered for a test drive for the position. However if there is a waiting list please kindly add me. I am known for patience and persistence.
Yours in faith
God yes.
Dang, I haven't seen this much action in a long time. This cat lady has still got it!
prep a casket. things are gonna get frisky.1 -
MrStabbems wrote: »LittleHearseDriver wrote: »happilybrad wrote: »[
You had me at your username.MrStabbems wrote: »I find LittleHearseDriver more arousing if I'm honest...Nitroalley2 wrote: »Dear madam,
I was dissappointed to not be considered for a test drive for the position. However if there is a waiting list please kindly add me. I am known for patience and persistence.
Yours in faith
God yes.
Dang, I haven't seen this much action in a long time. This cat lady has still got it!
prep a casket. things are gonna get frisky.
Can they watch?
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Haha I found my match above...
A guy who eats hot dogs and loves pickles.
.doesn't mind my cat collection...runs in parades to feel they are part of the festivities...and most importantly loves me for the way I pick my toe nails0 -
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Looking for someone that knows how to use a tape measure.
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OutOfUserName wrote: »FireTurtle75 wrote: »
I had another post that was the best that I've seen all day. *kitten* that, this just blew that post away. My new favorite post of the week! Awesome!browneyedgirl749 wrote: »I agree with this! I don't want flowers as an I'm sorry. You better cook me dinner and clean up the kitchen afterwards, followed by *kitten* me senseless making me forget why I was mad at you
sex after eating wont that gag her and end up puking all over your crotch?
What if there is no gag reflex? And besides, I'm the one mad, my needs better be catered to, not his. Just sayin...0 -
kitty_meow_meow_ wrote: »Looking for dabbing dance partner. Must be accomplished at Running Man and sensational at performing the Butter Churn. Send me your vids. Impress me or don't waste my time.
Omg we're a match!0 -
I can rock the hell out of the cabbage patch.0
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Hey, looking for a girl to like me !
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kitty_meow_meow_ wrote: »If you are interested in kittens, you are the man for me. If you love to touch kittens, cuddle with kittens, poke kittens, kiss kittens, feed kittens, stroke kittens, and just give kittens a lot of attention in general....give me a call.
Could be nice but I don't want to get over kittened.0 -
Binge watch old twilight zone episodes and 80's action flicks, while scrolling through eBay and Amazon for things you don't need but would love to have???3
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Seeking someone super fun!
Looking for that special someone who is always up for anything, loves adventure and has a bit of a mischievous personality. Must be kindhearted, spontaneous and fun-loving.
About me...I am all of the above with a twist. Just when you think you have me figured out I will do a 180 and you won't even know what happened...I promise I will always keep you guessing!
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Gym pizza n shots0
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Wings beer and oh kitten I can't have either of those
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Seeking someone to help me spend my millions .. 4
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Looking for a man who eats his salad without dressing and enjoys watching women eat steaks.2
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Seeking a fantasy
If you can make me believe it, it must be true! I am the one for you0 -
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"My husband doesn't listen to me, he doesn't understand my needs. You get me......" no worries. I'm your man. I'll pretend to give a *kitten* as long as it takes to get in your pants. You want aggressive. I got it. You want soft. I got that too. I can wear any mask you want.4
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Lf a women with a nice butt that I can play with all day, eats wings, drinks beer, funny, cute, and makes money.. is that asking to much?0
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Lmfao!0
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