Married and flirty....?
Replies
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Lol no one asks to pump your gas. You're lucky if you see a soul there when it's open lmao0
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150_lbs_by_2019 wrote: »Flirting is cheating of the heart and if you think it's harmless, you're wrong. I guarantee unless you are in an open relationship in which you and your wife are allowed to f@#k around on one another, there will be harm. Your wife will begin to lose all trust in you and always wonder if you're cheating around on her. She will analyze every female you have contact with and worry if that is the one you're screwing behind her back.
Short answer..... dunno.
There are different levels to most everything, including flirting and how others react is probably just as varied.1 -
TeinyWinehausen wrote: »I grew up in a small town..I know what 'can I pump your gas Mam' really means...
How do you feel about a complimentary oil change and lube job?4 -
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I can't agree with those who say flirting is cheating. I think flirting can be very innocent or if the intent behind it us to hook up can lead to cheating.
I think flirting can lead to more things but in itself it is mostly harmless. That being said my wife has seen me flirt if a friendly manner and its nothing to her. Flirting is the fine and hooking up is the cheating part. I wont go into open relationships and swinging because they is something I have no experience with.0 -
Runner1393 wrote: »I think it boils down to ego. People who get upset about their SO flirting are subconsciously worried about the bruising their ego might take. My wife is touchy about it to a degree but she knows I'm "flirty." I don't set out to do it but apparently I flirt. I couldn't care less if guys look at her or she is flirty with someone else by chance. I can't and wouldn't want to control her in any way so I don't worry about the "what ifs."
It doesn’t all come down to ego; sometimes it comes down to religion and ones belief system. I wouldn’t be in an open marriage bc my faith says it’s wrong and condemns it. Flirting isn’t harmless when you believe lusting is wrong. If one believes that the sole purpose of a marriage is to glorify their creator and be a representation of Christ’s love for the church, that cant in good conscience be defiled. For me it has nothing to do with ego, but what I believe is right and wrong. And everyone will believe differently. Xoxoxo
Fair point. The reason I said ego is because of an individuals definition of flirtation. I could say you have a nice smile and not think I'm flirting. You might interpret that as a flirtations comment while another women might think it's just a random compliment. I don't mean ego in general terms; ego based on the individuals ideals. To say 'flirt' as a blanket term and then to ask if it's cheating asks someone to define a subjective ideal with an objective statement.2 -
rickiimarieee wrote: »Being married and flirting. Like it's okay if you have admirers or whatever but when you step it up a notch and are flirting knowing your spouse would not be okay with it, if your spouse is okay with it, do your thing. But if she or he doesn't know or you gotta hide it, it's cheating.
Welcome to MFP. There's a widespread culture of cheating.
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abetterme9366 wrote: »rickiimarieee wrote: »Being married and flirting. Like it's okay if you have admirers or whatever but when you step it up a notch and are flirting knowing your spouse would not be okay with it, if your spouse is okay with it, do your thing. But if she or he doesn't know or you gotta hide it, it's cheating.
Welcome to REALITY. There's a widespread culture of cheating.
FIFY
What's your point? Online communities open up new avenues for people to engage in such behaviors0 -
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abetterme9366 wrote: »abetterme9366 wrote: »rickiimarieee wrote: »Being married and flirting. Like it's okay if you have admirers or whatever but when you step it up a notch and are flirting knowing your spouse would not be okay with it, if your spouse is okay with it, do your thing. But if she or he doesn't know or you gotta hide it, it's cheating.
Welcome to REALITY. There's a widespread culture of cheating.
FIFY
What's your point? Online communities open up new avenues for people to engage in such behaviors
My point is that is every where. Don't blame it on mfp, Jesus, I've been hit on playing words with friends. And before online communities happened it was happening at work, or at school, or at church. Or where ever the hell people are because that is reality.
For some reason AOL and the introduction of chat rooms came to mind. Oh the dial up days.1 -
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abetterme9366 wrote: »RockWarrior84 wrote: »abetterme9366 wrote: »abetterme9366 wrote: »rickiimarieee wrote: »Being married and flirting. Like it's okay if you have admirers or whatever but when you step it up a notch and are flirting knowing your spouse would not be okay with it, if your spouse is okay with it, do your thing. But if she or he doesn't know or you gotta hide it, it's cheating.
Welcome to REALITY. There's a widespread culture of cheating.
FIFY
What's your point? Online communities open up new avenues for people to engage in such behaviors
My point is that is every where. Don't blame it on mfp, Jesus, I've been hit on playing words with friends. And before online communities happened it was happening at work, or at school, or at church. Or where ever the hell people are because that is reality.
For some reason AOL and the introduction of chat rooms came to mind. Oh the dial up days.
As soon as you heard the screech of connecting online, you knew you were in for something good.
A/S/L was the ultimate question1 -
abetterme9366 wrote: »abetterme9366 wrote: »rickiimarieee wrote: »Being married and flirting. Like it's okay if you have admirers or whatever but when you step it up a notch and are flirting knowing your spouse would not be okay with it, if your spouse is okay with it, do your thing. But if she or he doesn't know or you gotta hide it, it's cheating.
Welcome to REALITY. There's a widespread culture of cheating.
FIFY
What's your point? Online communities open up new avenues for people to engage in such behaviors
My point is that is every where. Don't blame it on mfp, Jesus, I've been hit on playing words with friends. And before online communities happened it was happening at work, or at school, or at church. Or where ever the hell people are because that is reality.
You misunderstood my post. Stating a fact about MFP doesn't necessarily place the blame on MFP. Otherwise, your points are all valid.0 -
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abetterme9366 wrote: »abetterme9366 wrote: »rickiimarieee wrote: »Being married and flirting. Like it's okay if you have admirers or whatever but when you step it up a notch and are flirting knowing your spouse would not be okay with it, if your spouse is okay with it, do your thing. But if she or he doesn't know or you gotta hide it, it's cheating.
Welcome to REALITY. There's a widespread culture of cheating.
FIFY
What's your point? Online communities open up new avenues for people to engage in such behaviors
My point is that is every where. Don't blame it on mfp, Jesus, I've been hit on playing words with friends. And before online communities happened it was happening at work, or at school, or at church. Or where ever the hell people are because that is reality.
Wait.
You were hit on at church?
What do you wear under that choir robe?2 -
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abetterme9366 wrote: »Motorsheen wrote: »abetterme9366 wrote: »abetterme9366 wrote: »rickiimarieee wrote: »Being married and flirting. Like it's okay if you have admirers or whatever but when you step it up a notch and are flirting knowing your spouse would not be okay with it, if your spouse is okay with it, do your thing. But if she or he doesn't know or you gotta hide it, it's cheating.
Welcome to REALITY. There's a widespread culture of cheating.
FIFY
What's your point? Online communities open up new avenues for people to engage in such behaviors
My point is that is every where. Don't blame it on mfp, Jesus, I've been hit on playing words with friends. And before online communities happened it was happening at work, or at school, or at church. Or where ever the hell people are because that is reality.
Wait.
You were hit on at church?
What do you wear under that choir robe?
Whatever the preacher asked for
This church..... are they hiring?0 -
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abetterme9366 wrote: »Motorsheen wrote: »abetterme9366 wrote: »Motorsheen wrote: »abetterme9366 wrote: »abetterme9366 wrote: »rickiimarieee wrote: »Being married and flirting. Like it's okay if you have admirers or whatever but when you step it up a notch and are flirting knowing your spouse would not be okay with it, if your spouse is okay with it, do your thing. But if she or he doesn't know or you gotta hide it, it's cheating.
Welcome to REALITY. There's a widespread culture of cheating.
FIFY
What's your point? Online communities open up new avenues for people to engage in such behaviors
My point is that is every where. Don't blame it on mfp, Jesus, I've been hit on playing words with friends. And before online communities happened it was happening at work, or at school, or at church. Or where ever the hell people are because that is reality.
Wait.
You were hit on at church?
What do you wear under that choir robe?
Whatever the preacher asked for
This church..... are they hiring?
Think some lawsuit bankrupted them. Something about paying restitution, I don't really remember the specifics.
Any interest in starting your own church?
The tax breaks are quite attractive...... plus you get to set your own rules and regs.1 -
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abetterme9366 wrote: »Motorsheen wrote: »abetterme9366 wrote: »Motorsheen wrote: »abetterme9366 wrote: »Motorsheen wrote: »abetterme9366 wrote: »abetterme9366 wrote: »rickiimarieee wrote: »Being married and flirting. Like it's okay if you have admirers or whatever but when you step it up a notch and are flirting knowing your spouse would not be okay with it, if your spouse is okay with it, do your thing. But if she or he doesn't know or you gotta hide it, it's cheating.
Welcome to REALITY. There's a widespread culture of cheating.
FIFY
What's your point? Online communities open up new avenues for people to engage in such behaviors
My point is that is every where. Don't blame it on mfp, Jesus, I've been hit on playing words with friends. And before online communities happened it was happening at work, or at school, or at church. Or where ever the hell people are because that is reality.
Wait.
You were hit on at church?
What do you wear under that choir robe?
Whatever the preacher asked for
This church..... are they hiring?
Think some lawsuit bankrupted them. Something about paying restitution, I don't really remember the specifics.
Any interest in starting your own church?
The tax breaks are quite attractive...... plus you get to set your own rules and regs.
I've toyed with it but it always comes back to these damn skeletons in my closet
All churches have them
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abetterme9366 wrote: »RockWarrior84 wrote: »abetterme9366 wrote: »RockWarrior84 wrote: »abetterme9366 wrote: »abetterme9366 wrote: »rickiimarieee wrote: »Being married and flirting. Like it's okay if you have admirers or whatever but when you step it up a notch and are flirting knowing your spouse would not be okay with it, if your spouse is okay with it, do your thing. But if she or he doesn't know or you gotta hide it, it's cheating.
Welcome to REALITY. There's a widespread culture of cheating.
FIFY
What's your point? Online communities open up new avenues for people to engage in such behaviors
My point is that is every where. Don't blame it on mfp, Jesus, I've been hit on playing words with friends. And before online communities happened it was happening at work, or at school, or at church. Or where ever the hell people are because that is reality.
For some reason AOL and the introduction of chat rooms came to mind. Oh the dial up days.
As soon as you heard the screech of connecting online, you knew you were in for something good.
A/S/L was the ultimate question
And my connection was so *kitten* that by the time my reply was sent, the guy had long since moved on.
He was not gone just took him just as long for it to load.0 -
RockWarrior84 wrote: »abetterme9366 wrote: »RockWarrior84 wrote: »abetterme9366 wrote: »RockWarrior84 wrote: »abetterme9366 wrote: »abetterme9366 wrote: »rickiimarieee wrote: »Being married and flirting. Like it's okay if you have admirers or whatever but when you step it up a notch and are flirting knowing your spouse would not be okay with it, if your spouse is okay with it, do your thing. But if she or he doesn't know or you gotta hide it, it's cheating.
Welcome to REALITY. There's a widespread culture of cheating.
FIFY
What's your point? Online communities open up new avenues for people to engage in such behaviors
My point is that is every where. Don't blame it on mfp, Jesus, I've been hit on playing words with friends. And before online communities happened it was happening at work, or at school, or at church. Or where ever the hell people are because that is reality.
For some reason AOL and the introduction of chat rooms came to mind. Oh the dial up days.
As soon as you heard the screech of connecting online, you knew you were in for something good.
A/S/L was the ultimate question
And my connection was so *kitten* that by the time my reply was sent, the guy had long since moved on.
He was not gone just took him just as long for it to load.
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Runner1393 wrote: »It doesn’t all come down to ego; sometimes it comes down to religion and ones belief system. I wouldn’t be in an open marriage bc my faith says it’s wrong and condemns it. Flirting isn’t harmless when you believe lusting is wrong. If one believes that the sole purpose of a marriage is to glorify their creator and be a representation of Christ’s love for the church, that cant in good conscience be defiled. For me it has nothing to do with ego, but what I believe is right and wrong. And everyone will believe differently. Xoxoxo
Here, let me rock your theological world for a moment. Actually, scripture says nothing of the sort. True it is God's desire that marriage be between just one man & one woman, but, to have more than one is not a sin & the bible in no way condemns multiple spouses. Even in the NT, the marriages were not limited to one man/one woman, which was a concept taken from the restriction placed on OT Kings who were only supposed to have one wife. The one wife restriction was only placed only on persons of church leadership in the NT based on the idea that this was God's preferred model for marital relationships.
Nowhere in scripture does it condemn these actions at all. As a matter of fact in Exodus it actually expressly permits it. It's very specific that if someone had multiple spouses, that he was to treat the second wife as well as the first. The parable of the ten virgins. One Bridegroom & ten brides. It wasn't a confusing concept back then. Even God metaphorically describes himself as having a polygamous marriage between Himself, The Kingdom of Judah & the Kingdom of Israel. He also called them both wh-ores in that situation too. Then he declared judgment on one for being too much of a ho & took the other back & for gave her.
Why do I know this weird random info? Well, I was an associate pastor, a youth pastor, credentialed minister, spent years at bible college & I'm still an avid theology student. (I'm sure a few MFP'ers that are my friends are scratching their heads in disbelief after reading that) I'm ultra conservative theologically speaking, but I'm also a literalist. I refuse to make the bible say something that it doesn't even if it's something I'm not comfortable with.
Personally, the idea of more than one spouse is pretty forked up & just down right stupid, but your condemnation takes it even a step further than that even the condemning of conversation. All of these people would be perfectly within the biblical realm of freedom of what is permissible if they quit flirting & just said "I Do". Problem solved... or not.
When it comes down to religion & one's belief system, what does one do when certain bits of this system were built completely on a religious man made agenda vs what scripture actually says?6 -
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Renaissance_Turtle wrote: »Runner1393 wrote: »It doesn’t all come down to ego; sometimes it comes down to religion and ones belief system. I wouldn’t be in an open marriage bc my faith says it’s wrong and condemns it. Flirting isn’t harmless when you believe lusting is wrong. If one believes that the sole purpose of a marriage is to glorify their creator and be a representation of Christ’s love for the church, that cant in good conscience be defiled. For me it has nothing to do with ego, but what I believe is right and wrong. And everyone will believe differently. Xoxoxo
Here, let me rock your theological world for a moment. Actually, scripture says nothing of the sort. True it is God's desire that marriage be between just one man & one woman, but, to have more than one is not a sin & the bible in no way condemns multiple spouses. Even in the NT, the marriages were not limited to one man/one woman, which was a concept taken from the restriction placed on OT Kings who were only supposed to have one wife. The one wife restriction was only placed only on persons of church leadership in the NT based on the idea that this was God's preferred model for marital relationships.
Nowhere in scripture does it condemn these actions at all. As a matter of fact in Exodus it actually expressly permits it. It's very specific that if someone had multiple spouses, that he was to treat the second wife as well as the first. The parable of the ten virgins. One Bridegroom & ten brides. It wasn't a confusing concept back then. Even God metaphorically describes himself as having a polygamous marriage between Himself, The Kingdom of Judah & the Kingdom of Israel. He also called them both wh-ores in that situation too. Then he declared judgment on one for being too much of a ho & took the other back & for gave her.
Why do I know this weird random info? Well, I was an associate pastor, a youth pastor, credentialed minister, spent years at bible college & I'm still an avid theology student. (I'm sure a few MFP'ers that are my friends are scratching their heads in disbelief after reading that) I'm ultra conservative theologically speaking, but I'm also a literalist. I refuse to make the bible say something that it doesn't even if it's something I'm not comfortable with.
Personally, the idea of more than one spouse is pretty forked up & just down right stupid, but your condemnation takes it even a step further than that even the condemning of conversation. All of these people would be perfectly within the biblical realm of freedom of what is permissible if they quit flirting & just said "I Do". Problem solved... or not.
When it comes down to religion & one's belief system, what does one do when certain bits of this system were built completely on a religious man made agenda vs what scripture actually says?
Lord have mercy2
This discussion has been closed.
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