Dear Dr. MFP: Are you in a conundrum? Do you need bad advice? Ask away!
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Dr. Mfp
Do you think drinking bourbon tonight and posting in the forums is a good idea?0 -
nolan44219 wrote: »Dr. Mfp
Do you think drinking bourbon tonight and posting in the forums is a good idea?
This is highly encouraged behavior.1 -
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Ask him for an ITunes card?? IDK1 -
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MeeseeksAndDestroy wrote: »Will_Run_4_Food wrote: »MeeseeksAndDestroy wrote: »slimgirljo15 wrote: »Mfp ebaby daddy won't pay support, what should I do?
I read ebaby as like a baby you'd get off eBay and my immediate thought was how do you even ship that?
Put holes in the box
Would you have to buy it a plane ticket? Or do they go in cargo...do I need saw dust in the bottom of the box
Old newspaper would be better.1 -
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MeeseeksAndDestroy wrote: »slimgirljo15 wrote: »Mfp ebaby daddy won't pay support, what should I do?
I read ebaby as like a baby you'd get off eBay and my immediate thought was how do you even ship that?
It kinda sounds like something that will be happening soon0 -
How do I talk to a cute guy at the gym? Newly single after 9 years and I have no clue how any of this stuff works anymore!
Don't overthink it, just be confident, polite. Make small talk, smile, make eye contact. See where it goes from there.
If this does not work then slut yourself up a bit, make sure to do provocative moves around him such as the hip abductor and make strong eye contact with him as you spread those thighs. Do the downward dog right in front of him. Those kinds of things.
Or just be like I would and be completely awkward talking about oddball stuff, spilling your whole life story then somewhere in there sticking your foot in your mouth and insulting him. I will be honest, this approach never works. I always end up friend zoned.4 -
nolan44219 wrote: »Dr. Mfp
Do you think drinking bourbon tonight and posting in the forums is a good idea?
I know this was last night but the answer is always yes. Plus, I have a higher chance of getting confessions out of you!
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You are actually really pretty good at this, joking aside4
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CaptainFantastic00 wrote: »You are actually really pretty good at this, joking aside
LOL thank you, I have had someone else tell me that too. I told him I use to write, a lot and I do miss it. I have been toying the past few months with starting a blog but didn't know what I wanted my niche to be. I may have found it. I am still toying with it.1 -
Will_Run_4_Food wrote: »Dear Dr MFP,
Two part question.
1. I like her. I think she likes me. We aren't supposed to like each other. What's the best way to just let that go and forget about it?
2. Should I stop high-fiving everyone until the rash on my hands heals?
Toodles.
1. Timing is a real B sometimes, isn't it? What works for me is to find their faults. I know it sounds horrible but find those things that would drive you crazy if you were with them all the time and you will find that you are able to let it go easier. I also think about: what if I were to live with this person? Things would be way different than the flirting and fun stuff. It would be real life stuff and there would be issues coming up. It wouldn't be just the fun stuff all the time and I think when people connect on line or where ever; the fun stuff is the attraction, you start adding the real stuff and things would change.
2. Yes, you should also stop touching yourself. And see a doctor.7 -
RunHardBeStrong wrote: »Will_Run_4_Food wrote: »Dear Dr MFP,
Two part question.
1. I like her. I think she likes me. We aren't supposed to like each other. What's the best way to just let that go and forget about it?
2. Should I stop high-fiving everyone until the rash on my hands heals?
Toodles.
1. Timing is a real B sometimes, isn't it? What works for me is to find their faults. I know it sounds horrible but find those things that would drive you crazy if you were with them all the time and you will find that you are able to let it go easier. I also think about: what if I were to live with this person? Things would be way different than the flirting and fun stuff. It would be real life stuff and there would be issues coming up. It wouldn't be just the fun stuff all the time and I think when people connect on line or where ever; the fun stuff is the attraction, you start adding the real stuff and things would change.
2. Yes, you should also stop touching yourself. And see a doctor.
I'd like to click insightful, inspiring, like, awesome and woo on this post.3 -
RunHardBeStrong wrote: »Will_Run_4_Food wrote: »Dear Dr MFP,
Two part question.
1. I like her. I think she likes me. We aren't supposed to like each other. What's the best way to just let that go and forget about it?
2. Should I stop high-fiving everyone until the rash on my hands heals?
Toodles.
1. Timing is a real B sometimes, isn't it? What works for me is to find their faults. I know it sounds horrible but find those things that would drive you crazy if you were with them all the time and you will find that you are able to let it go easier. I also think about: what if I were to live with this person? Things would be way different than the flirting and fun stuff. It would be real life stuff and there would be issues coming up. It wouldn't be just the fun stuff all the time and I think when people connect on line or where ever; the fun stuff is the attraction, you start adding the real stuff and things would change.
Does this also work for forgetting someone who you've actually met in person and been intimate with and they suddenly ghost you and made you feel like a worthless pos?0 -
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Just_J_Now wrote: »RunHardBeStrong wrote: »Will_Run_4_Food wrote: »Dear Dr MFP,
Two part question.
1. I like her. I think she likes me. We aren't supposed to like each other. What's the best way to just let that go and forget about it?
2. Should I stop high-fiving everyone until the rash on my hands heals?
Toodles.
1. Timing is a real B sometimes, isn't it? What works for me is to find their faults. I know it sounds horrible but find those things that would drive you crazy if you were with them all the time and you will find that you are able to let it go easier. I also think about: what if I were to live with this person? Things would be way different than the flirting and fun stuff. It would be real life stuff and there would be issues coming up. It wouldn't be just the fun stuff all the time and I think when people connect on line or where ever; the fun stuff is the attraction, you start adding the real stuff and things would change.
Does this also work for forgetting someone who you've actually met in person and been intimate with and they suddenly ghost you and made you feel like a worthless pos?
Yes. That scenario is even better because you have to keep telling yourself what an effing a-hole they are for doing that and they don't deserve any of more of your emotions wasted on them. If they can can meet you in person, be intimate then just disappear with no word leaving you feeling like crap, they are a *kitten* person and probably never showed you their true personality and integrity to start with.1 -
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RunHardBeStrong wrote: »
And that you got the image off google0 -
CaptainFantastic00 wrote: »RunHardBeStrong wrote: »
And that you got the image off google
Ha! Yes, that too.0 -
Dear Dr Mfp,
My dating life has been alot more active since I changed my profile picture to Tom Cruise's on match.com.
..the dates however have not gone so well since I really look more like the love child of Danny Devito and Ron Pearlman.
I really think my problem is that women find me aloof and pretentious. After all I show up in a Ford Escort and I have that totally classy turqoise troll hanging from my rear view mirror and I encourage my dates to order from anywhere in the Taco Bell menu (no expense spared!).
Do you think I should start off the conversation telling them I'm really into circus midget porn? I think that might make me seem more approachable!2 -
2011rocket3touring wrote: »Dear Dr Mfp,
My dating life has been alot more active since I changed my profile picture to Tom Cruise's on match.com.
..the dates however have not gone so well since I really look more like the love child of Danny Devito and Ron Pearlman.
I really think my problem is that women find me aloof and pretentious. After all I show up in a Ford Escort and I have that totally classy turqoise troll hanging from my rear view mirror and I encourage my dates to order from anywhere in the Taco Bell menu (no expense spared!).
Do you think I should start off the conversation telling them I'm really into circus midget porn? I think that might make me seem more approachable!
I have a bit of a midget fetish so I can see where that angle would totally work! Clowns are creepy so as long as there aren't any midget clown scenes I think this could be the key to some lucky lady's heart!
The Ford Escort also pulls at my heart strings because my favorite car back when I was in college was my 1989 Ford Escort that my dad helped me find. It was a whole $800 bucks and it honestly took me awhile to warm up to.
I got in and found that the horn did not work, the guy rigged up a button on the dash though so when you pushed it this loud embarrassing fog horn type noise came out. I learned to make that noise my signature call when I pulled up to my friends' houses. The fan did not work so the guy also rigged up a switch to manually turn the fan on and off. I learned to become diligent about watching the temperature gage and paying more attention to things. The back had one of those fish shaped Christian Church Symbols, the ICHTUS. I was not brought up religious so I didn't understand it. I looked into it to find out what it was. I learned that it stemmed from — Mark 1:16-18 “As Jesus walked beside the Sea of Galilee, he saw Simon and his brother Andrew casting a net into the lake, for they were fishermen. 'Come, follow me,' Jesus said, 'and I will make you fishers of men.' At once they left their nets and followed him.” For some reason that resonated with me. And I learned to step outside of my comfort zone. Be unique. Don't be a follower. Once you step outside your comfort zone you grow by leaps and bounds, mentally and usually physically. The trunk was tricky, when you went to stick the key in the hole, the whole lock would fall inside the trunk. But my car was unique.
My dad told me that day in the guy's driveway, "I know this isn't the brand new Cavalier with all the bells and whistles that you just totaled but it's a car and you need a car. It takes someone with character to drive a car with character." I have used this statement from my dad so many times in the past 23 years and I cherish that day and the memories I had in that POS $800 car. In fact, my theme some for that car was Sandler's "POS Car". I blared that song with pride from the crappy little speakers. When I hear that song now, I laugh so hard that I cry.
This is my really long of version of saying, it takes a girl with character to date a guy with astounding character and don't settle for less. Keep looking, keep being yourself and she will come.
Also, don't use Tom Cruise pics, no one likes a catfish.
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RunHardBeStrong wrote: »2011rocket3touring wrote: »Dear Dr Mfp,
My dating life has been alot more active since I changed my profile picture to Tom Cruise's on match.com.
..the dates however have not gone so well since I really look more like the love child of Danny Devito and Ron Pearlman.
I really think my problem is that women find me aloof and pretentious. After all I show up in a Ford Escort and I have that totally classy turqoise troll hanging from my rear view mirror and I encourage my dates to order from anywhere in the Taco Bell menu (no expense spared!).
Do you think I should start off the conversation telling them I'm really into circus midget porn? I think that might make me seem more approachable!
I have a bit of a midget fetish so I can see where that angle would totally work! Clowns are creepy so as long as there aren't any midget clown scenes I think this could be the key to some lucky lady's heart!
The Ford Escort also pulls at my heart strings because my favorite car back when I was in college was my 1989 Ford Escort that my dad helped me find. It was a whole $800 bucks and it honestly took me awhile to warm up to.
I got in and found that the horn did not work, the guy rigged up a button on the dash though so when you pushed it this loud embarrassing fog horn type noise came out. I learned to make that noise my signature call when I pulled up to my friends' houses. The fan did not work so the guy also rigged up a switch to manually turn the fan on and off. I learned to become diligent about watching the temperature gage and paying more attention to things. The back had one of those fish shaped Christian Church Symbols, the ICHTUS. I was not brought up religious so I didn't understand it. I looked into it to find out what it was. I learned that it stemmed from — Mark 1:16-18 “As Jesus walked beside the Sea of Galilee, he saw Simon and his brother Andrew casting a net into the lake, for they were fishermen. 'Come, follow me,' Jesus said, 'and I will make you fishers of men.' At once they left their nets and followed him.” For some reason that resonated with me. And I learned to step outside of my comfort zone. Be unique. Don't be a follower. Once you step outside your comfort zone you grow by leaps and bounds, mentally and usually physically. The trunk was tricky, when you went to stick the key in the hole, the whole lock would fall inside the trunk. But my car was unique.
My dad told me that day in the guy's driveway, "I know this isn't the brand new Cavalier with all the bells and whistles that you just totaled but it's a car and you need a car. It takes someone with character to drive a car with character." I have used this statement from my dad so many times in the past 23 years and I cherish that day and the memories I had in that POS $800 car. In fact, my theme some for that car was Sandler's "POS Car". I blared that song with pride from the crappy little speakers. When I hear that song now, I laugh so hard that I cry.
This is my really long of version of saying, it takes a girl with character to date a guy with astounding character and don't settle for less. Keep looking, keep being yourself and she will come.
Also, don't use Tom Cruise pics, no one likes a catfish.
I absolutely loved this story1 -
RunHardBeStrong wrote: »2011rocket3touring wrote: »Dear Dr Mfp,
My dating life has been alot more active since I changed my profile picture to Tom Cruise's on match.com.
..the dates however have not gone so well since I really look more like the love child of Danny Devito and Ron Pearlman.
I really think my problem is that women find me aloof and pretentious. After all I show up in a Ford Escort and I have that totally classy turqoise troll hanging from my rear view mirror and I encourage my dates to order from anywhere in the Taco Bell menu (no expense spared!).
Do you think I should start off the conversation telling them I'm really into circus midget porn? I think that might make me seem more approachable!
I have a bit of a midget fetish so I can see where that angle would totally work! Clowns are creepy so as long as there aren't any midget clown scenes I think this could be the key to some lucky lady's heart!
The Ford Escort also pulls at my heart strings because my favorite car back when I was in college was my 1989 Ford Escort that my dad helped me find. It was a whole $800 bucks and it honestly took me awhile to warm up to.
I got in and found that the horn did not work, the guy rigged up a button on the dash though so when you pushed it this loud embarrassing fog horn type noise came out. I learned to make that noise my signature call when I pulled up to my friends' houses. The fan did not work so the guy also rigged up a switch to manually turn the fan on and off. I learned to become diligent about watching the temperature gage and paying more attention to things. The back had one of those fish shaped Christian Church Symbols, the ICHTUS. I was not brought up religious so I didn't understand it. I looked into it to find out what it was. I learned that it stemmed from — Mark 1:16-18 “As Jesus walked beside the Sea of Galilee, he saw Simon and his brother Andrew casting a net into the lake, for they were fishermen. 'Come, follow me,' Jesus said, 'and I will make you fishers of men.' At once they left their nets and followed him.” For some reason that resonated with me. And I learned to step outside of my comfort zone. Be unique. Don't be a follower. Once you step outside your comfort zone you grow by leaps and bounds, mentally and usually physically. The trunk was tricky, when you went to stick the key in the hole, the whole lock would fall inside the trunk. But my car was unique.
My dad told me that day in the guy's driveway, "I know this isn't the brand new Cavalier with all the bells and whistles that you just totaled but it's a car and you need a car. It takes someone with character to drive a car with character." I have used this statement from my dad so many times in the past 23 years and I cherish that day and the memories I had in that POS $800 car. In fact, my theme some for that car was Sandler's "POS Car". I blared that song with pride from the crappy little speakers. When I hear that song now, I laugh so hard that I cry.
This is my really long of version of saying, it takes a girl with character to date a guy with astounding character and don't settle for less. Keep looking, keep being yourself and she will come.
Also, don't use Tom Cruise pics, no one likes a catfish.
I absolutely loved this story Thank you, it's absolutely true. Even I can't make this shiznit up.
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How many "married and flirting, good or bad" threads do we need MFP?
Also, what is the true answer?0 -
_Captivated_ wrote: »How many "married and flirting, good or bad" threads do we need MFP?
Also, what is the true answer?
Apparently we need about 500 but in all honesty we don't need any because pretty much every thread turns in that direction anyway.1 -
RunHardBeStrong wrote: »_Captivated_ wrote: »How many "married and flirting, good or bad" threads do we need MFP?
Also, what is the true answer?
Apparently we need about 500 but in all honesty we don't need any because pretty much every thread turns in that direction anyway.
Oh and the true answer is always 42.4
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