Dear Dr. MFP: Are you in a conundrum? Do you need bad advice? Ask away!
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RunHardBeStrong wrote: »
And that you got the image off google0 -
CaptainFantastic00 wrote: »RunHardBeStrong wrote: »
And that you got the image off google
Ha! Yes, that too.0 -
Dear Dr Mfp,
My dating life has been alot more active since I changed my profile picture to Tom Cruise's on match.com.
..the dates however have not gone so well since I really look more like the love child of Danny Devito and Ron Pearlman.
I really think my problem is that women find me aloof and pretentious. After all I show up in a Ford Escort and I have that totally classy turqoise troll hanging from my rear view mirror and I encourage my dates to order from anywhere in the Taco Bell menu (no expense spared!).
Do you think I should start off the conversation telling them I'm really into circus midget porn? I think that might make me seem more approachable!2 -
2011rocket3touring wrote: »Dear Dr Mfp,
My dating life has been alot more active since I changed my profile picture to Tom Cruise's on match.com.
..the dates however have not gone so well since I really look more like the love child of Danny Devito and Ron Pearlman.
I really think my problem is that women find me aloof and pretentious. After all I show up in a Ford Escort and I have that totally classy turqoise troll hanging from my rear view mirror and I encourage my dates to order from anywhere in the Taco Bell menu (no expense spared!).
Do you think I should start off the conversation telling them I'm really into circus midget porn? I think that might make me seem more approachable!
I have a bit of a midget fetish so I can see where that angle would totally work! Clowns are creepy so as long as there aren't any midget clown scenes I think this could be the key to some lucky lady's heart!
The Ford Escort also pulls at my heart strings because my favorite car back when I was in college was my 1989 Ford Escort that my dad helped me find. It was a whole $800 bucks and it honestly took me awhile to warm up to.
I got in and found that the horn did not work, the guy rigged up a button on the dash though so when you pushed it this loud embarrassing fog horn type noise came out. I learned to make that noise my signature call when I pulled up to my friends' houses. The fan did not work so the guy also rigged up a switch to manually turn the fan on and off. I learned to become diligent about watching the temperature gage and paying more attention to things. The back had one of those fish shaped Christian Church Symbols, the ICHTUS. I was not brought up religious so I didn't understand it. I looked into it to find out what it was. I learned that it stemmed from — Mark 1:16-18 “As Jesus walked beside the Sea of Galilee, he saw Simon and his brother Andrew casting a net into the lake, for they were fishermen. 'Come, follow me,' Jesus said, 'and I will make you fishers of men.' At once they left their nets and followed him.” For some reason that resonated with me. And I learned to step outside of my comfort zone. Be unique. Don't be a follower. Once you step outside your comfort zone you grow by leaps and bounds, mentally and usually physically. The trunk was tricky, when you went to stick the key in the hole, the whole lock would fall inside the trunk. But my car was unique.
My dad told me that day in the guy's driveway, "I know this isn't the brand new Cavalier with all the bells and whistles that you just totaled but it's a car and you need a car. It takes someone with character to drive a car with character." I have used this statement from my dad so many times in the past 23 years and I cherish that day and the memories I had in that POS $800 car. In fact, my theme some for that car was Sandler's "POS Car". I blared that song with pride from the crappy little speakers. When I hear that song now, I laugh so hard that I cry.
This is my really long of version of saying, it takes a girl with character to date a guy with astounding character and don't settle for less. Keep looking, keep being yourself and she will come.
Also, don't use Tom Cruise pics, no one likes a catfish.
6 -
RunHardBeStrong wrote: »2011rocket3touring wrote: »Dear Dr Mfp,
My dating life has been alot more active since I changed my profile picture to Tom Cruise's on match.com.
..the dates however have not gone so well since I really look more like the love child of Danny Devito and Ron Pearlman.
I really think my problem is that women find me aloof and pretentious. After all I show up in a Ford Escort and I have that totally classy turqoise troll hanging from my rear view mirror and I encourage my dates to order from anywhere in the Taco Bell menu (no expense spared!).
Do you think I should start off the conversation telling them I'm really into circus midget porn? I think that might make me seem more approachable!
I have a bit of a midget fetish so I can see where that angle would totally work! Clowns are creepy so as long as there aren't any midget clown scenes I think this could be the key to some lucky lady's heart!
The Ford Escort also pulls at my heart strings because my favorite car back when I was in college was my 1989 Ford Escort that my dad helped me find. It was a whole $800 bucks and it honestly took me awhile to warm up to.
I got in and found that the horn did not work, the guy rigged up a button on the dash though so when you pushed it this loud embarrassing fog horn type noise came out. I learned to make that noise my signature call when I pulled up to my friends' houses. The fan did not work so the guy also rigged up a switch to manually turn the fan on and off. I learned to become diligent about watching the temperature gage and paying more attention to things. The back had one of those fish shaped Christian Church Symbols, the ICHTUS. I was not brought up religious so I didn't understand it. I looked into it to find out what it was. I learned that it stemmed from — Mark 1:16-18 “As Jesus walked beside the Sea of Galilee, he saw Simon and his brother Andrew casting a net into the lake, for they were fishermen. 'Come, follow me,' Jesus said, 'and I will make you fishers of men.' At once they left their nets and followed him.” For some reason that resonated with me. And I learned to step outside of my comfort zone. Be unique. Don't be a follower. Once you step outside your comfort zone you grow by leaps and bounds, mentally and usually physically. The trunk was tricky, when you went to stick the key in the hole, the whole lock would fall inside the trunk. But my car was unique.
My dad told me that day in the guy's driveway, "I know this isn't the brand new Cavalier with all the bells and whistles that you just totaled but it's a car and you need a car. It takes someone with character to drive a car with character." I have used this statement from my dad so many times in the past 23 years and I cherish that day and the memories I had in that POS $800 car. In fact, my theme some for that car was Sandler's "POS Car". I blared that song with pride from the crappy little speakers. When I hear that song now, I laugh so hard that I cry.
This is my really long of version of saying, it takes a girl with character to date a guy with astounding character and don't settle for less. Keep looking, keep being yourself and she will come.
Also, don't use Tom Cruise pics, no one likes a catfish.
I absolutely loved this story1 -
RunHardBeStrong wrote: »2011rocket3touring wrote: »Dear Dr Mfp,
My dating life has been alot more active since I changed my profile picture to Tom Cruise's on match.com.
..the dates however have not gone so well since I really look more like the love child of Danny Devito and Ron Pearlman.
I really think my problem is that women find me aloof and pretentious. After all I show up in a Ford Escort and I have that totally classy turqoise troll hanging from my rear view mirror and I encourage my dates to order from anywhere in the Taco Bell menu (no expense spared!).
Do you think I should start off the conversation telling them I'm really into circus midget porn? I think that might make me seem more approachable!
I have a bit of a midget fetish so I can see where that angle would totally work! Clowns are creepy so as long as there aren't any midget clown scenes I think this could be the key to some lucky lady's heart!
The Ford Escort also pulls at my heart strings because my favorite car back when I was in college was my 1989 Ford Escort that my dad helped me find. It was a whole $800 bucks and it honestly took me awhile to warm up to.
I got in and found that the horn did not work, the guy rigged up a button on the dash though so when you pushed it this loud embarrassing fog horn type noise came out. I learned to make that noise my signature call when I pulled up to my friends' houses. The fan did not work so the guy also rigged up a switch to manually turn the fan on and off. I learned to become diligent about watching the temperature gage and paying more attention to things. The back had one of those fish shaped Christian Church Symbols, the ICHTUS. I was not brought up religious so I didn't understand it. I looked into it to find out what it was. I learned that it stemmed from — Mark 1:16-18 “As Jesus walked beside the Sea of Galilee, he saw Simon and his brother Andrew casting a net into the lake, for they were fishermen. 'Come, follow me,' Jesus said, 'and I will make you fishers of men.' At once they left their nets and followed him.” For some reason that resonated with me. And I learned to step outside of my comfort zone. Be unique. Don't be a follower. Once you step outside your comfort zone you grow by leaps and bounds, mentally and usually physically. The trunk was tricky, when you went to stick the key in the hole, the whole lock would fall inside the trunk. But my car was unique.
My dad told me that day in the guy's driveway, "I know this isn't the brand new Cavalier with all the bells and whistles that you just totaled but it's a car and you need a car. It takes someone with character to drive a car with character." I have used this statement from my dad so many times in the past 23 years and I cherish that day and the memories I had in that POS $800 car. In fact, my theme some for that car was Sandler's "POS Car". I blared that song with pride from the crappy little speakers. When I hear that song now, I laugh so hard that I cry.
This is my really long of version of saying, it takes a girl with character to date a guy with astounding character and don't settle for less. Keep looking, keep being yourself and she will come.
Also, don't use Tom Cruise pics, no one likes a catfish.
I absolutely loved this story
Thank you, it's absolutely true. Even I can't make this shiznit up.
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How many "married and flirting, good or bad" threads do we need MFP?
Also, what is the true answer?0 -
_Captivated_ wrote: »How many "married and flirting, good or bad" threads do we need MFP?
Also, what is the true answer?
Apparently we need about 500 but in all honesty we don't need any because pretty much every thread turns in that direction anyway.1 -
RunHardBeStrong wrote: »_Captivated_ wrote: »How many "married and flirting, good or bad" threads do we need MFP?
Also, what is the true answer?
Apparently we need about 500 but in all honesty we don't need any because pretty much every thread turns in that direction anyway.
Oh and the true answer is always 42.4 -
RunHardBeStrong wrote: »RunHardBeStrong wrote: »_Captivated_ wrote: »How many "married and flirting, good or bad" threads do we need MFP?
Also, what is the true answer?
Apparently we need about 500 but in all honesty we don't need any because pretty much every thread turns in that direction anyway.
Oh and the true answer is always 42.
Bless this post1 -
Is 42 also the answer for how many "Does sex count as exercise" threads are appropriate?0
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_Captivated_ wrote: »Is 42 also the answer for how many "Does sex count as exercise" threads are appropriate?
Fourty-two is the answer to life, the universe, and everything1 -
CaptainFantastic00 wrote: »_Captivated_ wrote: »Is 42 also the answer for how many "Does sex count as exercise" threads are appropriate?
Fourty-two is the answer to life, the universe, and everything
I know, but...1 -
_Captivated_ wrote: »Is 42 also the answer for how many "Does sex count as exercise" threads are appropriate?
No. That should be 69.5 -
RunHardBeStrong wrote: »_Captivated_ wrote: »Is 42 also the answer for how many "Does sex count as exercise" threads are appropriate?
No. That should be 69.
What if it's only missionary and not 69?0 -
Dr mfp,
Serious question... If is 69 is 69, what is 66 and 99? And is 96 what happens when you finish a 69?2 -
_Captivated_ wrote: »RunHardBeStrong wrote: »_Captivated_ wrote: »Is 42 also the answer for how many "Does sex count as exercise" threads are appropriate?
No. That should be 69.
What if it's only missionary and not 69?
Then just 1 cuz that is boring.0 -
nolan44219 wrote: »Dr mfp,
Serious question... If is 69 is 69, what is 66 and 99? And is 96 happens when you finish a 69?
66 and 99 could be same sex couples then if you bring them together it could be a foursome.
If 69 turns into 96 immediately after then you are with the wrong person.3
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