Minor rant

145791016

Replies

  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    am i supposed to gaf if you want my reply? did i imply that at some point? thanks for your "permission", but its not needed :)

    OMG. Please keep posting. You're cracking me up.

    Why so angry?

    Best part is you are both trying to make the same point.....

    yes, i was trying to make the same point... thats why her comment made no sense, but, whatever...
    What? Just ... what?

    LMAO
  • jofjltncb6
    jofjltncb6 Posts: 34,415 Member
    am i supposed to gaf if you want my reply? did i imply that at some point? thanks for your "permission", but its not needed :)

    OMG. Please keep posting. You're cracking me up.

    Why so angry?

    Best part is you are both trying to make the same point.....

    Both saying the same thing...

    ...except one interjected awkwardly and is doing it much more angrily than the other.


    This thread continues to deliver.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    Or even better:

    Me to Poster A: "The sky is not green, it's blue."

    Poster B to me: "You're wrong. The sky is BLUE!"

    Me to Poster B: "I wasn't talking to you."

    Poster B: "I can reply to whatever I want!"

    I needed this laugh.
  • KatWood
    KatWood Posts: 1,135 Member
    First thoughts were that the woman in your story probably didn't think about how her words could be construed. Then I read your replies and I have a few things to say:

    - One, well done on your success, and your self confidence in your achievement is awesome.
    - Two, even in your "before" pic you looked good
    - Three, my favourite pic of yours is the clubscene one
    - Four, you do indeed seem to be graciously accepting all comments geared at saying how awful/jealous etc the other person it is, but getting incredibly touchy any time anyone else expresses an alternate point of view. Which means now I've put that out there I'll probably get flamed or told you don't want my opinion. To be honest, I think people are going to be more judgemental of your attitude than your ribs

    I agree with this 100%. I don't think the woman in the story meant any harm and may have been expressing concern (whether misplaced or not) that the OP may be a bit too small now. In my unwanted opinion the OP does look a bit underweight now but if she feels good and her doctor say she is healthy then who am I to judge based simply on a few photos. She has obviously worked hard and feels great. So congrats to her for her success. Anyone who is posting on here should expect and welcome both comments supporting his or her point of view and criticism. In general, people are not posting these comments to be offensive, they truly care about the health and well being of their fellow members.
  • adorable_aly
    adorable_aly Posts: 398 Member
    haha such an entertaining thread!
  • action_figure
    action_figure Posts: 511 Member
    Hey, I think you did a great job with your weight. You're the only one here who really knows if you're at your healthiest. I mean, you are at the bottom range of healthy BMI. You are very lean. And you're strong. The way to know if you have enough fat is to look at how you function. Is your hair brittle, is your skin dry and thin and problematic? Are you still menstruating? (Note, I DO NOT WANT TO KNOW THE ANSWERS TO THESE QUESTIONS! They're just for you.) If all the things that are mediated by fat in your body are working fine, then you're fine. As you've said, people have different body types. I think it's natural though for people to worry about a beautiful woman who may be affected by the negative messages our culture sends out all the time. I mean, let's face it, even supermodels get airbrushed thinner, and have their skin enhanced, etc. etc. etc. No one is deemed "pretty enough" to grace the pages of a magazine unretouched, and even Cindy Crawford is quoted as saying "I wish *I* looked like Cindy Crawford." We live in a sick culture, and no matter where you are on that continuum of body types, people are going to have stuff to say. I do think most of it has been coming from a place of concern though, not hate.
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 49,029 Member
    Maybe she doesn't like having attractive competition in the office? :P
    Lol, this. Women are strange like that. Men just buy more toys.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • RGv2
    RGv2 Posts: 5,789 Member
    am i supposed to gaf if you want my reply? did i imply that at some point? thanks for your "permission", but its not needed :)

    OMG. Please keep posting. You're cracking me up.

    Why so angry?

    Best part is you are both trying to make the same point.....

    Both saying the same thing...

    ...except one interjected awkwardly and is doing it much more angrily than the other.


    This thread continues to deliver.

    thread-delivers.jpg

    Yep...
  • Morwen1969
    Morwen1969 Posts: 11
    Think of it this way, dear. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Strange, isn't it, how the beholder tends to be a tad overcritical if the beholder is yourself? This woman, who saw you at 200 lbs and said you looked beautiful, obviously saw something you missed. This isn't to say you didn't still need to lose the weight. That's only to say she saw something beautiful in you. Isn't that wonderful? My sister and I do this exact same thing to ourselves, so what we do is, whenever we happen to pass a mirror and the thought, "who is that ugly person?" crosses our minds, we will back up and look again until we find at least one beautiful thing about the face looking back at us. Personally, and not meaning to boast here, I'm fond of my eyes and my smile. I think they are what makes my face beautiful, even at 300+ pounds. They will still be what makes me beautiful when I reach my goal weight. So, I challenge you. Drag out that picture again when you have a private moment and look at it. What is there about that person that's beautiful, even if she's overweight? There must be something.

    Also, and this is just a suggestion, go to that coworker who said you were beautiful at 200 lbs and thank her. People who see the beauty in others are so rare nowadays. It's a real sadness.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    am i supposed to gaf if you want my reply? did i imply that at some point? thanks for your "permission", but its not needed :)

    OMG. Please keep posting. You're cracking me up.

    Why so angry?

    Best part is you are both trying to make the same point.....

    Both saying the same thing...

    ...except one interjected awkwardly and is doing it much more angrily than the other.


    This thread continues to deliver.

    thread-delivers.jpg

    Yep...
    Is that car from Krypton?
  • CarmenSRT
    CarmenSRT Posts: 843 Member
    Weight loss can make you look older - facially. It happens to me, and looking at your pics it has that effect on you as well. People notice that and make an unfavorable comparison overall. If you're happy with how you look now then someone else having a different opinion should roll off your back like water.
  • runningagainstmyself
    runningagainstmyself Posts: 616 Member
    You look fabulous. I think that what that woman said stems from jealousy, pure and simple.
  • RoadsterGirlie
    RoadsterGirlie Posts: 1,195 Member
    Hey, I think you did a great job with your weight. You're the only one here who really knows if you're at your healthiest. I mean, you are at the bottom range of healthy BMI. You are very lean. And you're strong. The way to know if you have enough fat is to look at how you function. Is your hair brittle, is your skin dry and thin and problematic? Are you still menstruating? (Note, I DO NOT WANT TO KNOW THE ANSWERS TO THESE QUESTIONS! They're just for you.) If all the things that are mediated by fat in your body are working fine, then you're fine. As you've said, people have different body types. I think it's natural though for people to worry about a beautiful woman who may be affected by the negative messages our culture sends out all the time. I mean, let's face it, even supermodels get airbrushed thinner, and have their skin enhanced, etc. etc. etc. No one is deemed "pretty enough" to grace the pages of a magazine unretouched, and even Cindy Crawford is quoted as saying "I wish *I* looked like Cindy Crawford." We live in a sick culture, and no matter where you are on that continuum of body types, people are going to have stuff to say. I do think most of it has been coming from a place of concern though, not hate.

    Completely agreed 100%. Even the plus sized models in Dove's "real beauty" campaign are airbrushed to hell. I have no problem with companies using fit or thin models to sell clothes. After all, those are real women too. However, when they have to airbrush somebody who already looks fantastic, what kind of message is that sending?

    It's not just the media, but society and people in general. Damned if you are heavy, and damned if you are thin. If you have an hour glass figure, then your hips are too wide. If you have a small butt and no hips, then you are built like a little boy.

    Men may experience this a bit as well, but not to the extent that women do.
  • segwayne
    segwayne Posts: 52 Member
    @RoadsterGirli

    How's that saying go? "Haters gonna hate" ?? :-)

    What's important is how you feel, not what someone who didn't know you back then thinks...Nothing else matters.

    Wayne
  • All that matters is how you feel about you know. No one else's opinion does. She was rude to say that though. It's very presumptuous. Good job on your journey!
  • goodnamegone
    goodnamegone Posts: 237
    Wow she sure wins the prize for stupid things to say so someone. I'm sure you looked beautiful when you were overweight but you also look amazing now and more importantly you FEEL better.

    People are weird, they can say the most STUPID things and have no clue about it. What can I say? Now you know who you're working with. I'm sure she meant no harm, one of those people that crashes through life with no idea ha ha ha.

    You know better than her, do you feel better? Do you think you look better? Yes you do.
  • fit4lifeUcan2
    fit4lifeUcan2 Posts: 1,458 Member
    It's probably true. I find when some people lose weight their face changes, and not for the good. I liked my face a little better with the cheek chub.

    ^^ My thoughts as well. Could be your face looks a bit saggy in person now? or gaunt? Your BMI is underweight. Yes I know you said your not that your fine etc. etc. Just going by your profile and the info on BMI for your height and weight says your underweight. So maybe she is seeing something you don't?

    I'm 2 inches taller than you and when I was 130 which is just 3 pounds more than you are.. I looked sickly. I had to gain weight to get pregnant.
  • ekball
    ekball Posts: 12 Member
    Weight loss can make you look older - facially. It happens to me, and looking at your pics it has that effect on you as well.

    *facepalm*
  • RoadsterGirlie
    RoadsterGirlie Posts: 1,195 Member
    Weight loss can make you look older - facially. It happens to me, and looking at your pics it has that effect on you as well.

    *facepalm*

    No kidding. Things that people say to each other on the Internet they would never say to each other in real life.
  • supergirl6
    supergirl6 Posts: 224 Member
    Think of it this way, dear. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Strange, isn't it, how the beholder tends to be a tad overcritical if the beholder is yourself? This woman, who saw you at 200 lbs and said you looked beautiful, obviously saw something you missed. This isn't to say you didn't still need to lose the weight. That's only to say she saw something beautiful in you. Isn't that wonderful? My sister and I do this exact same thing to ourselves, so what we do is, whenever we happen to pass a mirror and the thought, "who is that ugly person?" crosses our minds, we will back up and look again until we find at least one beautiful thing about the face looking back at us. Personally, and not meaning to boast here, I'm fond of my eyes and my smile. I think they are what makes my face beautiful, even at 300+ pounds. They will still be what makes me beautiful when I reach my goal weight. So, I challenge you. Drag out that picture again when you have a private moment and look at it. What is there about that person that's beautiful, even if she's overweight? There must be something.

    Also, and this is just a suggestion, go to that coworker who said you were beautiful at 200 lbs and thank her. People who see the beauty in others are so rare nowadays. It's a real sadness.

    This. Well said and beautiful too.

    Also, I think it is important at this point in this thread to remember that women are beautiful at all shapes and sizes and should never be made to feel they aren't or that they need more work before they can be called beautiful. We should be celebrating accomplishments and congratulating each other on how far we've come, not what we could be when we finally hit goal weight.

    And someone can still be fit even though they still have weight to lose. "Fit" is not an end destination, it's a journey with a constantly moving finish line. A 200 lb girl can still be strong and tough and beautiful and able to run half marathons and lift heavy and keep up. It sounds to me like your coworker was just recognizing that in you. That you were always beautiful, not just now that you've lost all the weight.
  • Cadori
    Cadori Posts: 4,810 Member
    am i supposed to gaf if you want my reply? did i imply that at some point? thanks for your "permission", but its not needed :)

    OMG. Please keep posting. You're cracking me up.

    Why so angry?

    Best part is you are both trying to make the same point.....

    yes, i was trying to make the same point... thats why her comment made no sense, but, whatever...

    It's because you started your post with "actually". It gave a corrective tone to your post when, actually (swidt?), you meant the same thing. It came across as oddly argumentative.
  • RoadsterGirlie
    RoadsterGirlie Posts: 1,195 Member
    Think of it this way, dear. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Strange, isn't it, how the beholder tends to be a tad overcritical if the beholder is yourself? This woman, who saw you at 200 lbs and said you looked beautiful, obviously saw something you missed. This isn't to say you didn't still need to lose the weight. That's only to say she saw something beautiful in you. Isn't that wonderful? My sister and I do this exact same thing to ourselves, so what we do is, whenever we happen to pass a mirror and the thought, "who is that ugly person?" crosses our minds, we will back up and look again until we find at least one beautiful thing about the face looking back at us. Personally, and not meaning to boast here, I'm fond of my eyes and my smile. I think they are what makes my face beautiful, even at 300+ pounds. They will still be what makes me beautiful when I reach my goal weight. So, I challenge you. Drag out that picture again when you have a private moment and look at it. What is there about that person that's beautiful, even if she's overweight? There must be something.

    Also, and this is just a suggestion, go to that coworker who said you were beautiful at 200 lbs and thank her. People who see the beauty in others are so rare nowadays. It's a real sadness.

    This. Well said and beautiful too.

    Also, I think it is important at this point in this thread to remember that women are beautiful at all shapes and sizes and should never be made to feel they aren't or that they need more work before they can be called beautiful. We should be celebrating accomplishments and congratulating each other on how far we've come, not what we could be when we finally hit goal weight.

    And someone can still be fit even though they still have weight to lose. "Fit" is not an end destination, it's a journey with a constantly moving finish line. A 200 lb girl can still be strong and tough and beautiful and able to run half marathons and lift heavy and keep up. It sounds to me like your coworker was just recognizing that in you. That you were always beautiful, not just now that you've lost all the weight.

    Thanks to both of you for that. :flowerforyou:
  • CarmenSRT
    CarmenSRT Posts: 843 Member
    Weight loss can make you look older - facially. It happens to me, and looking at your pics it has that effect on you as well.

    *facepalm*

    No kidding. Things that people say to each other on the Internet they would never say to each other in real life.

    This really bothers you? Not the intent at all. I'm sorry.
  • RoadsterGirlie
    RoadsterGirlie Posts: 1,195 Member
    Well I had JUST posted something in regards of "damned if you do, damned if you don't."

    Woman's bodies are always under a microscope not just by the media, but other people. If I feel good about my body, now I have to worry about face.

    If my face looks good, now I have to worry about my body.

    Physically I feel good right now (read strong and full of energy), so that's what I'm guaging my health on.

    Not if I have a few wrinkles.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    am i supposed to gaf if you want my reply? did i imply that at some point? thanks for your "permission", but its not needed :)

    OMG. Please keep posting. You're cracking me up.

    Why so angry?

    Best part is you are both trying to make the same point.....

    yes, i was trying to make the same point... thats why her comment made no sense, but, whatever...

    It's because you started your post with "actually". It gave a corrective tone to your post when, actually (swidt?), you meant the same thing. It came across as oddly argumentative.
    I had to go back and look to make sure I quoted who I thought I'd quoted before I even responded.
  • sharonfoustmills
    sharonfoustmills Posts: 519 Member
    possibly she is jealous of you after all, it sounds like it- and you being new there, she might not have felt she had any competition for attractiveness at the office before you came and now she is not comfortable with it- also she may constantly strive to get thinner and not succeed and thus feel threatened by you? at any rate, what matters is how your health is, so ignore her
  • LordOberon
    LordOberon Posts: 73 Member
    [/quote]

    Best part is you are both trying to make the same point.....
    [/quote]

    Both saying the same thing...

    ...except one interjected awkwardly and is doing it much more angrily than the other.


    This thread continues to deliver.
    [/quote]

    thread-delivers.jpg

    Yep...
    [/quote]
    Is that car from Krypton?
    [/quote]

    Most van trailers are little more than tin and sheet of plywood. So its about as sturdy as the grasp on logic as a few of the people posting in this thread :ohwell:
  • Cadori
    Cadori Posts: 4,810 Member
    am i supposed to gaf if you want my reply? did i imply that at some point? thanks for your "permission", but its not needed :)

    OMG. Please keep posting. You're cracking me up.

    Why so angry?

    Best part is you are both trying to make the same point.....

    yes, i was trying to make the same point... thats why her comment made no sense, but, whatever...

    It's because you started your post with "actually". It gave a corrective tone to your post when, actually (swidt?), you meant the same thing. It came across as oddly argumentative.
    I had to go back and look to make sure I quoted who I thought I'd quoted before I even responded.

    I scrolled back to check too, because it seemed weird that she was arguing with you when A) you weren't talking to her and B) you were essentially making the same point.
  • RoadsterGirlie
    RoadsterGirlie Posts: 1,195 Member
    possibly she is jealous of you after all, it sounds like it- and you being new there, she might not have felt she had any competition for attractiveness at the office before you came and now she is not comfortable with it- also she may constantly strive to get thinner and not succeed and thus feel threatened by you? at any rate, what matters is how your health is, so ignore her

    We have plenty of vibrant, beautiful women in my office. I've made the decision to forgive and forget. She's otherwise a very nice person and I get along with her very well. At this point, it's not worth worrying about, regardless of where that remark came from.

    I'm just focusing on the positive in my life. Hubby and I just moved into this awesome little house, and are having a ball furnishing it. My marriage is great, so I'm focusing on that - stuff that really matters.
  • susanmc31
    susanmc31 Posts: 287 Member
    Well, this was entertaining!

    OP - you are beautiful and all that matters is that you are happy with yourself at the end of the day.
This discussion has been closed.