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The Sober Squad- Alcohol Free Living

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  • whitpaulywhitpauly Posts: 978Member Member Posts: 978Member Member
    Morning friends, Lorraine,glad it went well ❤️ I wish there was a "thanks" button on here your comment was great to hear this morning, Feeling FooFoo,you're doing well,don't think too far ahead just think of today,I often think I sabotage myself being scared if I can stay sober during certain events so I end up drinking earlier than the event I'm scared of,the whole thing is a mindgame that's for sure,Donimfp I'm sorry about your A/C that really sucks! Also sorry that your doc didn't seem to grasp that the tinitus is bugging you as bad as it is,ugh doctor's just don't listen sometimes! Waves to all and wishes for a happy and healthy AF day 💗
  • whitpaulywhitpauly Posts: 978Member Member Posts: 978Member Member
    Checking in again this week. 115 days free from alcohol. I'm still vaping THC which defeats my urge to drink. I have been doing it once a week every Friday. Today just so happens to be Friday, so I'm going to do it again most likely tonight, unless I otherwise change my mind. This routine is working out pretty well I'd say so far.

    I don't think there's anything wrong with this,as I've stated before I think this is waaaaay safer on the body than alcohol 💁
  • lorrainequiche59lorrainequiche59 Posts: 633Member Member Posts: 633Member Member
    People mag is highlighting Kelly Obsourne's 2 year anniversary of her sobriety today. The blurb said she put a pic of her 12 steps app on instagram and thanked all those who supported her through her journey and she expressed her gratitude for how much her life has changed in the past 2 years. She ended by saying, "If you are new to sobriety stick to it, life really does get good."

    SO, that led me to think about how we "stick to it." It is more than the "desire" to be AF, it requires that we look at others who are sticking to it and follow their example, and get the help we need. For Kelly O, it was obviously AA & surrounding herself with supportive people who would help her to follow through with her desire to be AF. Perhaps AA isn't something we want to try, but we will never know unless we do. I'm not promoting AA by any means...I've been to 2 meetings so far so I'm definitely not the poster-child for AA. But the reason I even considered "trying" it is because of the example of others here and although my immediate thought was, "I don't think that's for me," I changed my mind when I hit a really tough spot & decided, "it doesn't hurt to try!!" And so, I'm trying something I never would have considered and that would be my encouragement to others who are struggling..get some help...try something new rather than depending on your own resolve. If we continue to be open to trying different resources, we will eventually find what does work for us.There is a ton of help in varying forms and we just need to reach out and try.

    Happy, healthy AF day <3

    PS - I hope others will share what has helped them in their fight to be AF even if you've said it before, reminders are always good.
  • FeelinFooFooFeelinFooFoo Posts: 2,997Member Member Posts: 2,997Member Member
    donimfp wrote: »
    @FeelinFooFoo, you are doing a good job of thinking things through. I had the honor of living in Edinburgh for 4 years (Texan here!). I love that city so much, but it really would be a challenge being AF there, at least if things are like they were when I lived there. The main thing is, be kind to yourself and take care of yourself. You can do this!

    And the festival is on just now, too, added challenge. I live right beside there in Glasgow, but only been to Edinburgh a handful of times. Looking forward to it, going to take my brother to Edinburgh dungeons for his birthday! Spooky!

    You came a long way from Texas! Do you have family or friends in Edinburgh?
  • RubyRed427RubyRed427 Posts: 2,205Member Member Posts: 2,205Member Member
    Facing my anxiety now without alcohol as a crutch, is a powerful & proud feeling.

    It’s a toss up for me - drinking causes anxiety for me - my body gets a weird anxious vibe the day after. Maybe meditation could help you with your anxiety. Or even a short term fix like an anti anxiety pill you could take as needed. Wishing you the best 😉
  • FeelinFooFooFeelinFooFoo Posts: 2,997Member Member Posts: 2,997Member Member
    donimfp wrote: »
    Drinking definitely causes anxiety for me, also, even though the lying alcohol promises me it will "cure" the anxiety. My goal is to find healthful ways to reduce stress and anxiety. Meditation does help. For me, floating in the cool river is about the best remedy. Alcohol is NOT it, but it sure is tempting.

    @FeelingFooFoo, my ex-husband did a PhD at University of Edinburgh, so I got to spend 4 years there. We even adopted a wee Scottish red-headed boy while there. He's now 36 and has a good ol' Texas twang instead of the adorable accent he had when we met him at age 6. Enjoy the Festival! What an amazing time to be there. I'm sure there will be lots of AF options, too.

    You even adopted a wee red head boy that's amazing! Adoption is an amazing thing to be able to do.

    Yeah, I will try to stay AF and yeah exactly, there is so many delicious AF options I'm sure I'l find something. Or a mocktail.
  • whitpaulywhitpauly Posts: 978Member Member Posts: 978Member Member
    I'm cool as a cucumber when the alcohol is in me but as it starts to burn off I'm a nervous,shaky mess! After awhile off it anxiety tends to fade away
  • FeelinFooFooFeelinFooFoo Posts: 2,997Member Member Posts: 2,997Member Member
    My brothers birthday is on 14th and I have got his cards and gifts and I thought about buying him a Chinese takeaway meal as a treat, then I thought, what else could we do on Wednesday to 'toast' his birthday ? He has a bottle of champagne that he was given recently at work for getting the company's 3000th review. He said he was saving it for a 'special occasion'. I wonder if he will mention it on Wednesday?

    This all got me thinking about something while I was doing the AE. drinking because you want to/chose to, versus not having control over drinking, or not. I have surprised myself by thinking I don't want to drink. I don't normally feel that way towards alcohol. Normally I'd be rubbing my hands together and wondering how soon I could drink or I would have asked my brother, let's open that bottle ! It's your birthday after all! It made me think also, how conditioned iv been to associate every special occasion with drink. Birthday=alcohol. It's hardly a shock that I had developed such an ingrained way of thinking. But I'm starting to see that you can actually have fun without alcohol. It's a new perspective for me that's for sure.

    Think I'm coming to these conclusions after a few reduction attempts. I think my time spent doing AE really made a big impression on me more than I realised. (Although I know I'm not out of the woods just yet). But pleased with the way I'm thinking about things now. It's giving me a lot of optimism that I can be more in control.
  • lorrainequiche59lorrainequiche59 Posts: 633Member Member Posts: 633Member Member
    Facing my anxiety now without alcohol as a crutch, is a powerful & proud feeling.

    Good for you!!! Yes it is empowering to gain control over something we never thought we'd be able to control. I need to apply this to my eating issue!!!! Is there specific ways that you cope with your anxiety now that you've stopped masking it with alcohol?
  • nighthawk584nighthawk584 Posts: 364Member Member Posts: 364Member Member
    Facing my anxiety now without alcohol as a crutch, is a powerful & proud feeling.

    Good for you!!! Yes it is empowering to gain control over something we never thought we'd be able to control. I need to apply this to my eating issue!!!! Is there specific ways that you cope with your anxiety now that you've stopped masking it with alcohol?

    Believe me, I had/have an eating issue too! I still take one pill that levels my brain chemistry out, but does not affect my everyday functions and does not ZONK me out. I was drinking 2-3 drinks plus taking meds per day just to leave my house. It hasn't been easy and I still struggle every day, but am gaining more confidence with getting my body back in shape and that is my focus. I was 280 last April and am now 217.8 as of today. I wish there was an easy answer to tell you. One step, one calorie, ONE DAY at a time.
    edited August 11
  • lorrainequiche59lorrainequiche59 Posts: 633Member Member Posts: 633Member Member
    @FeelinFooFoo I was wondering if you've ever really observed others who are drinking when you are not. The reason I ask that is because this round of being around others' drinking while sober, I wasn't so focused on my end of things as to how I was going to resist the plentiful drinks, but on how it was influencing others to act and trying to notice if their drinking was making the evening more fun for them and to be honest, I do not think that to be true in any way...in fact, at times, I would notice someone who was quite inebriated looking at me, but it was as though they were trying really hard to focus and I tried to remember that feeling of being "out of it", but pretending I wasn't "out of it". One thing that really stood out to me in particular is the vulgar language coming from someone who normally wouldn't speak that way and it was just so unattractive. There were a lot of fun moments, but they were interspersed with some very inappropriate behavior that clouded the fun. There was not one moment when I wished I was free to do what they were AKA overdrinking!! In fact, it only served to reinforce my commitment to remain AF.

    I also believe that my sobriety is helping with my grief in ways that alcohol just is not capable of doing...in fact, alcohol delays the grief and just adds another layer to other unresolved grief....and then we become like rats on a wheel, slowly...or quickly...spinning out of control...

  • lorrainequiche59lorrainequiche59 Posts: 633Member Member Posts: 633Member Member
    @FeelinFooFoo Forgot my suggestion to you in the blurb above LOL If you decide to remain AF for your bro's b'day, try really watching people as the alcohol takes effect....it could be an eye-opener for you and you might begin to think of the connection of alcohol to specific events as less of a temptation for you...it's worth a try. :D
  • FeelinFooFooFeelinFooFoo Posts: 2,997Member Member Posts: 2,997Member Member
    @FeelinFooFoo Forgot my suggestion to you in the blurb above LOL If you decide to remain AF for your bro's b'day, try really watching people as the alcohol takes effect....it could be an eye-opener for you and you might begin to think of the connection of alcohol to specific events as less of a temptation for you...it's worth a try. :D

    It's rather weird you mention about observing others while drinking. Only yesterday when out for lunch with my bf, a couple of guys drinking beer sat down at a table close by. We were eating and trying to enjoy our food and it was kinda ruined by the fact that, one of the guys in particular, kept swearing loudly, every sentence had a swear word and I am not a prude, but there is a time and place and they could clearly see we were eating a meal. Maybe a mix of alcohol and just bad manners I think! They got louder and louder Maybe I only really noticed it because I was sober and trying to focus on my meal. But the one guy kept repeating the same stuff, like he was feeling the need to keep hammering the one point about something that, really wasn't all that interesting 😆 his friend seemed to be just sitting there like, yeah, I heard you first time. It made me realise how passionate he was becoming about a seemingly unimportant thing. It got me thinking about how alcohol affects our emotions. Good and bad. Becoming out of control and not being who we really are. Our inebriated self isn't a reflection of our true self. It's like a hyped up version or a depressed version with very little in between.
    edited August 11
  • whitpaulywhitpauly Posts: 978Member Member Posts: 978Member Member
    Morning friends,ugh Lorraine,you probably wouldn't like to be around me in real life cuz I cuss like a sailor even without alcohol 😆 I hafta catch myself when I'm cutting hair cuz I just say whatever sometimes,no bueno! FeelingFooFoo, I think when you did the AE it really opened your eyes on the alcohol and how to avoid it,seems like you're really thinking things through when it comes to al,that's great! On the AA post yesterday I have tried it a few times, it's just not for me but I'm glad some people love to go,I have nothing against anything that works to stop drinking! Wishes for a fabulous AF day for us all💗
  • FeelinFooFooFeelinFooFoo Posts: 2,997Member Member Posts: 2,997Member Member
    whitpauly wrote: »
    Morning friends,ugh Lorraine,you probably wouldn't like to be around me in real life cuz I cuss like a sailor even without alcohol 😆 I hafta catch myself when I'm cutting hair cuz I just say whatever sometimes,no bueno! FeelingFooFoo, I think when you did the AE it really opened your eyes on the alcohol and how to avoid it,seems like you're really thinking things through when it comes to al,that's great! On the AA post yesterday I have tried it a few times, it's just not for me but I'm glad some people love to go,I have nothing against anything that works to stop drinking! Wishes for a fabulous AF day for us all💗

    Oh yes lol the AE opened my eyes for sure. I'm realising that without alcohol, there is a whole world of possibilities, that I will have the energy and time to enjoy! Even although for all these years I believed alcohol was the only answer, I can't possibly ignore my new outlook. (A part of me is like, huh ? What do you mean, are you sure??) It just proves how much of a hold drinking can have and influence your desicions.
  • RubyRed427RubyRed427 Posts: 2,205Member Member Posts: 2,205Member Member
    I love reading all of your comments and I agree with them!

    Last night I went to bed early around 10 o’clock on a Saturday night. I had my window open and throughout the night I heard different young people arrive home probably from a night out on the town. I felt like the mother in the shoe listening. At about 3 AM I heard a couple of guys come from an Uber I I assume, because they stated how expensive that ride was. And then they all laughed and said they sure wish they could have some Taco Bell now.The irony is I was totally sober but up all night because of drinking.
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