At Goal & Successfully Maintaining. So Why Am I Doing This All Over Again?
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Some awesome, insightful comments. Agree with @ridiculous59 the other users here on MFP are fabulous. I appreciate so much that I have a place to discuss - without glazed looks from others - the stuff that’s become so integral to my life. And most of all, with considered replies and no judgment.
BL and I are on the west coast right now, visiting the sweeeeeet little wee grandbaby.
He’s stuck to his calories pretty well. For me, it’s been a bloodbath. I’ve been under one day out of the past six, otherwise it’s all been in the distant rear view mirror. There’s a lot of temptation, and can I just say, the Hello Fresh meals have been good, but my word! The oils, sour cream, mayo and Marzetti that have been in every. single. recipe. are making me fume. And puh-lease!!!!! Just four ounces of chicken per meal?!!!! I’m ravenous. I’m watching and learning. I could get similar results for a fraction of the calories with some tweaks.
The kids are also relying on Grub Hub, and there’s been trips to the farmers market here which had some killer high cal treats. The pizza last night was just swell. And I’m swollen this morning, lol.
I’m trying to be low maintenance. Nobody wants a PITA mother critiquing everything they eat, or whipping out the scale.
This is all on me. I did it one day, and BL is managing very well. I don’t know why travel does this to me.
Daughter is beating herself up over pregnancy weight gain, which adds an additional layer of angst. She’s managed to get in some yoga classes with us watching le baby, and we’ve done a couple together, which has been fun. She’s a very knowledgeable yoga instructor with a beautiful, challenging practice, but hasn’t done any in months. I’ve improved a lot since the last time she did yoga with me, so right now we are kind of on par, which both surprises her and I can tell it’s adding to her frustration.
Trying to be very low key and not discuss food choices.
She has a friend coming over for lunch who is vegetarian Keto, and has been surprised I know about Keto, and a basic knowledge of what are Keto friendly foods.
Yah, thanks MFP!
I’m making a vegan Keto chili for lunch for everyone. Have never tasted Beyond Beef, so am very very interested to see how this turns out. Beans on the side for those who want them. 👍🏻7 -
I feel ya. I just came back from a trip myself and I ate aaaallll the foods... Between 2500 and 3500 calories a day (very coarse estimate, nothing weighed!), and being less active than usually.
Breakfast buffets, dinner buffets, family party with several courses and a gigantic dessert buffet... My only 'salvation' was 3 days in between the two weekends when we weren't in a hotel or with family, which meant it was purely home-cooked meals (plus hiking). The scale was remarkably unperturbed by all of this.
PS: chili with beans on the side 'for those who want them'? Blasphemy, chili without beans isn't chili 😎1 -
PS: chili with beans on the side 'for those who want them'? Blasphemy, chili without beans isn't chili 😎
I know, right? I’m trying to be mindful of the Keto friend who is coming for lunch.
Chili with just a small can of diced tomatoes, onion, celery and beyond beef sounds like tomato sauce to me. And this recipe claims to be six servings. 🤔
I suggested we also rice a cauliflower to put it over to add some bulk. It seems to still be low carb? I also got some Parmesan whisps from Trader Joe’s to crumble on top. Zero carbs. Daughter was most impressed. 😎
I have no idea what’s “in range” for Keto but this is coming up to about 22. I usually eat several hundred carbs per day so this seems low?
I feel ya on the travel feasting. I get a bit, err, plugged up when I travel and I dehydrate because my county has one of the “best tasting” water systems in the country and when I go elsewhere, especially coastal areas, the water is just disgusting. And I balk at buying bottled water. I’m so bloated and swollen, my muffin top has a muffin top, and my digestive tract sounds like a pipe organ for days now, especially with the rich foods. Ugh. TMI. Ha!!!!
However, the local strawberries here offset any complaints. Wowsa!!!!!!5 -
FOMO?springlering62 wrote: »(snipsies of good stuff)
This is all on me. I did it one day, and BL is managing very well. I don’t know why travel does this to me.
I tend to do that when traveling, and FOMO is a big part of the "why", for me.
(more snip)
Trying to be very low key and not discuss food choices.
She has a friend coming over for lunch who is vegetarian Keto, and has been surprised I know about Keto, and a basic knowledge of what are Keto friendly foods.
Yah, thanks MFP!
I’m making a vegan Keto chili for lunch for everyone. Have never tasted Beyond Beef, so am very very interested to see how this turns out. Beans on the side for those who want them. 👍🏻
I'll be interested to hear what you think. When I tried some (sampled a little at a store), I thought it tasted like meh beef.
In my personal world, tasting like beef at all is a bad thing, but that's definitely not the case for all veg people - possibly especially not all strong ethical vegans or non-WF health-motivated veg*ans of all types.
I know, I'm weird. Let it go, eh? More beef, real or faux, for the rest of you.I feel ya. I just came back from a trip myself and I ate aaaallll the foods... Between 2500 and 3500 calories a day (very coarse estimate, nothing weighed!), and being less active than usually.
Breakfast buffets, dinner buffets, family party with several courses and a gigantic dessert buffet... My only 'salvation' was 3 days in between the two weekends when we weren't in a hotel or with family, which meant it was purely home-cooked meals (plus hiking). The scale was remarkably unperturbed by all of this.
PS: chili with beans on the side 'for those who want them'? Blasphemy, chili without beans isn't chili 😎
That, I'm in sympathy with. Beans are kind of a carb bomb, though. It's one (among many) reasons I wouldn't remotely consider veg keto (or even veg low-carb) a good choice, for me. Lummesome beans.
Sadly (?), my "aaaallll the foods" can be 5000+. If it doesn't go on and on and on (time-wise), sticks to a normal vacation trip length of a week or two, things seem to sort out, long term . . . especially if there's rowing camp or some other pretty-active trip in the cards.3 -
I feel ya…I don’t know what it is but when we visit dd I can’t seem to stop eating and forget the water, too.0
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For me travel is a thing I associate with... being an extended EVENT I guess, not just life in a new place. So if I'm traveling it gets classed as 'a special occasion' with my head and I eat accordingly.
Also I've been at an agility trial 6 out of the past 14 days. Everything I have hurts, I have eaten more sugar than I have in the previous 3 months and I don't wanna talk about sodium, and just plain eaten a lot. ...I'm up 5lbs. We'll see how it shakes out but tbf I don't even care right now. I just want sleep.5 -
@AnnPT77
I’ll let BL sum it up. When asked what he thought of Impossible Meat he said, “Why? When we can have the real stuff?”
It gave a nice texture to the chili, but didn’t lend any flavor whatsoever. Like undercover tofu. Not satiating to me, either.3 -
One of my friends posed a great question on her feed. “Do you ever feel like an imposter?”
Wow. That one word just made me hit the brakes.
A lot of us have mentioned Body Dysmorphia here. That’s when you still see the “old you” in the mirror, even after you’ve accomplished substantial weight loss.
But….Imposter?
Yes. I do feel like an imposter. Even though I was underweight into my mid twenties, and “only” spent 30 years overweight and obese, I do feel like an imposter returning to slimness.
I feel like people who knew me obese are clicking their tongues and knowingly asking one another “wonder how long before she puts it back on?” I think strangers look at me, and notice the wrinkles on arms and face and easily identify me as a fat person in a skinny body.
I even have great difficulty using the term “skinny body”, because I feel like I haven’t earned it. Shouldn’t I have been punished more somehow, or is the mental anxiety punishment enough? The constant need to stand sideways in front of a mirror to make sure I didn’t get fat again in the last few hours. Recent yoga classes visiting a gym with mirrored walls have been……awful.
When I plank and my “stomach-teats” (aka extra skin on abdomen) hang down, I feel like everyone knows. And laughs silently. (TBH, it is pretty damn funny looking.) When I shop, part of me is torn between pride at heading directly to the XS rack, and the feeling that people are judging me as phony and silently pushing me back to the XXLs. I don’t know how they’d know, but I’m certain in the moment they do.
I even worry that people here think I’m an imposter, a fat person posting someone else’s pictures and pretending to dish advice I have no experience with. “How does she eat that much and claim to stay thin?” (another very fraught word).
Visiting the kids, and trying not to be a dietary diva while they cope with an infant, I’ve fallen easily back into bad habits, and while my inner voice says “it’s OK, you’ll fall back into those good habits when you get back home”, it’s also silently screaming, “See?! I told you so! You big fake! Where’s the chocolate?”
Ironically, BL has coped magnificently, and I swear has lost two sizes while we’ve been here. Dare I say, I’m jealous of and angry with him, when really it’s me I’m angry at?
Have you ever unpacked a memory foam anything and had it practically explode out of the box? I feel like Fat Me is my shadow, waiting to catch up with me, explode my body back again, and expose me as the fraud I am.
For some reason, my friend’s simple question just really hit me on the raw.
I do absolutely love that she said, for her, the imposter feeling came about when her four year old was telling someone “Mommy loves vegetables. Mommy loves to exercise”. Her daughter has no memory of her being bigger.
Imposter or no, what a terrific, admirable, inspiring example she’s setting for her daughter.
Am I alone? What’s your experience? Why are we (or, just me) so wrapped up in this? Is it culture? Upbringing? Self doubt? self hate? Why oh why is our weight so important to us when, really, it’s just a matter of fueling our body? With delicious, delicious food. *sigh*18 -
Your post gave me shivers, Spring. I do always feel like the other ball is going to drop.
I'm 75 pounds down and have been working at this for about a year. I look in the mirror and am excited to see that I look taller and thinner, but there is still so far to go. I've been at the same weight now for a month and am just leaving on my first big trip since COVID. I'm a bit scared about what's going to happen and feel like I need to pack some bigger clothes just in case. Instead, I'm making sure the clothes I pack aren't tight, but comfortable at my current size.
My plan is to eat what I want, but in smaller portions than I used to. I'm heading to Botswana with my son and sister and they've never been before. I get to see it through their eyes and I'm so excited. When I get back, it will be time to lose what I gained on the trip and focus on the last 34 pounds. I'll definitely be checking in to get some added support.
The good news? I'm traveling at a smaller size and in so much better shape than I've been in for decades. I'm stronger and have way more energy.
Why am I so wrapped up in all of this? Because I care and know that I've managed to gain weight back before. I'm really proud of myself and what I've accomplished, but recognize that this journey isn't over and I need constant vigilance to stay healthy.8 -
Hm, imposter... I recently changed jobs, so all the people at work have no idea I used to be obese, no idea I used to be a couch potato.
And I am hyperaware of the fact that when I talk about my exercise, they think I'm innately a sporty/athletic person. If only they knew... But in my mind as well, this is all still so recent (1000 day streak on MFP recently, and it did take that long to arrive at my current activity level) so I do wonder if this is a long term thing, if I will keep it up when hurdles get thrown my way.
So I do feel like a bit of an imposter, because I see myself as someone who does a lot of exercise, not someone who is athletic or sporty or active. I still have trouble saying I'm a runner, I 'just' do a lot of running.7 -
Hm, imposter... I recently changed jobs, so all the people at work have no idea I used to be obese, no idea I used to be a couch potato.
And I am hyperaware of the fact that when I talk about my exercise, they think I'm innately a sporty/athletic person. If only they knew... But in my mind as well, this is all still so recent (1000 day streak on MFP recently, and it did take that long to arrive at my current activity level) so I do wonder if this is a long term thing, if I will keep it up when hurdles get thrown my way.
So I do feel like a bit of an imposter, because I see myself as someone who does a lot of exercise, not someone who is athletic or sporty or active. I still have trouble saying I'm a runner, I 'just' do a lot of running.
And I feel like an imposter for another reason, I just realized.
Those people who did know me obese tend to be impressed with my weight loss for the effort it required. But it was easy. So easy I'm sometimes ashamed I ever got obese. Sure, I needed consistency, flexibility, some problem solving skills. But so few hurdles compared to a lot of people: no medical conditions making it harder, no kids to take care of, no financial obstacles, no busy life to juggle (just a regular full time job). If the circumstances had been different, harder, would I have been able to make it work?5 -
I struggle mightily with imposter syndrome in so many aspects of my life... personally and professionally... as an engineer, a scientist, a friend, a parent, or partner. I did so as child and find that I still do at now 33.
When it comes to fitness and being active on the platform a large portion of it stems from luckily never being "that fat" to most. At my estimated heaviest (~205 lbs) I was merely overweight and the first time I got to be a healthy weight was practically by accident, at age 17 many moons before coming to MFP at 23, and even then only ~185-190 lbs. Similar to Springler's friend and Lietchi, my 3 year old son and coworkers don't know me as the doughy nerd from my youth, or even noticed the 15-20 lbs gained and lost when I first started working at my current employer right out of college. My son constantly talks about how Daddy is "big and strong" and it does often feel as though we're just telling him this fantastical story... that it's all a rouse. I had the good fortune to be able catch up with a colleague this morning, who I haven't seen in over a year. The first thing out of his mouth was "What have you been up to? Other than clearly working out a ton..." and I can't really believe I look any different than I would have the last time he saw me or that I look all that much different than a few years ago. Even from when I started at 26, I still don't think i necessarily look like I lift or feel particularly strong or proud of my lifting totals. Thus the level of thought, and effort, and intent with which I pursue trying to get to a place where I feel even fractionally as "big and strong" as my son sees me to be seems so futile at times.8 -
springlering62 wrote: »(snipperama of good content)
Am I alone? What’s your experience? Why are we (or, just me) so wrapped up in this? Is it culture? Upbringing? Self doubt? self hate? Why oh why is our weight so important to us when, really, it’s just a matter of fueling our body? With delicious, delicious food. *sigh*
You're not alone. In my case, I think not exactly imposter syndrome (a concept I struggle to understand in most contexts), but the doubt and fear that this can happen, have happened, continue - that's familiar.
Bizarrely, one thing I think has helped me was slowly, non-intentionally regaining around 10-15 pounds (over the course of around 4 years) . . . and then when my jeans got a little snug, thinking "OK, enough of this nonsense", and slowly, intentionally creeping weight back down (over the course of more than a year!).
In a way, it's like how I used to worry that if I took a few days off my workout routine, I'd derail and never go back to it, physically decline quickly as a result. Over literally years (I've been active much longer than I've been thin), I learned that if I take a few days off, I start feeling really cr*ppy - moody, tense, stiff, and more, and worse - so I feel driven to work out again to feel decent again.
In either case, it may take some time for me to reach that homeostatic self-correction stage, and I'm not saying nothing could derail me ever, but after a while, that kind of mechanism kicked in, on both fronts. YMMV.
I had more trouble, early on, on the activity front: I felt more imposter-ish as an athlete. When I rowed at masters nationals one year, there were like two truly fat people there competing (among many hundreds of people), and I was one of them. (Don't get excited: "masters" in rowing is just post-collegiate old people. Anyone could enter masters nationals.) It's one of those sports where the tech clothing doesn't come in truly fat sizes. (I was class 1 obese, for context.) Also, I'd never been athletic - one of those chosen last or near-last for teams in gym class.
What got me over the hump in terms of thinking of myself an athlete was two things. One, the biggest by far, was my first coach (then assistant coach of a very successful NCAA Div I women's rowing team, later head coach of one of the top in the US). Her academic field was sports psychology, so she was great at team-building and confidence-building. From day one, she called us "athletes".
At one point, she had us do a little exercise where she asked us to write down 3 things that would have to happen, in order for each of us individually to feel like an athlete. (I think she'd maybe gotten weary of our self deprecation?) So, we wrote it down, and I stuck mine in my rowing file folder. A year or few later, I ran across the paper. The things had happened. OK, hit me with a 2x4. I'm an athlete.
IMO, pretty much everyone who's ever said "I'm not an athlete, but . . . " is an athlete.
The second thing that helped me feel like an athlete was that after I suspended disbelief, worked hard and persistently, and followed training plans and such . . . I didn't s*ck. I didn't dominate and never will, but I objectively wasn't truly awful at it. Go figure!
Now, I always tell new people (to any kind of athletic thing) to suspend disbelief, seek out good training resources, follow them sensibly to gradually increase fitness . . . and they'll surprise themselves. I really believe that.
Big caveat on all of this, though: My weight per se isn't very important to me, i.e., not that important as a number, not that important from an appearance standpoint. I haven't much cared about my appearance since adolescence, honestly - I just try to keep it respectable. That's one of a number of ways in which I tend to think I'm not a normal woman (which I'm fine with, BTW). I'm team "no makeup, no hair dye (well, it was lavender for while, but mostly it's been gray for years), practical clothes/shoes" and eventually joined team "no breasts", post cancer. I'm just not appearance driven, to a potentially dysfunctional degree. I'm inside of here; I don't mostly need to look at me, so meh.
Why I thought I was naturally unathletic: History. Bookish = nonathletic, in my youth. Female, to a large extent = non-athletic, in my youth (quite far pre Title IX in the US). Of course I was non-athletic!
As far as why I thought I was naturally fat? I think it was the mythology that we get fat as we age, the fact that my mom was fat (but didn't damage me on the body image front, BTW - she was kind of extraordinary), the fact that I was fat in high school, the fact that I was unathletic, blah blah blah. I'd only ever been thin in my college years, and that was about my active job and bike/walk transportation on a huge campus, mostly.
In my mid-40s, when I got very active, trained regularly, stayed class 1 obese, I figured I had a "slow metabolism", and that was reinforced by my being severely hypothyroid by then, too (partly genetic - dad was hypo). In actual reality, my calorie experience suggests I might even have a faster-than-average "metabolism". Go figure.
Sorry. Another *baby-feline* essay.8 -
Reading all of the above posts have dampened my eyes.
New in the journey, but yes, the imposter tries to rear its ugly head. You are uncoordinated so why are you trying to exercise and be athletic. You are destined to go out of this world overweight like your mother and all of her sisters. You've tried this other times and quit before you accomplished your goal.
The self doubt tries to find a space in my mind. I have lost weight, my clothes are fitting better, but I have this imposter looking at me in the mirror as you are a chubby girl, not seeing the curves that are showing. You are uncoordinated and will never be a real runner even though I am making progress.
Honestly the 1st 2 months the weight loss was easy. Going on my 4th month now and if I am honest, it is much more of a struggle. I know I need to eat in the deficit to lose weight. I know I need to eat sensibly and somewhat healthy. I know I am developing better eating habits, but there are some days it is just impossible to ignore the "old" eating style and indulge and give no care to what I am doing. SELF SABOTAGE. Why? I want to be thin, I want to be healthy, and I do not want to continue the Yo-yo diet forever. And worse, I am not enjoying the food I have chosen to sabotage.
I know I can do this, I have more days that my confidence is I got this "diet" thing under control. But there are way to many days of late, throw self control out the window and eat like you just dont give a damn. Fall back into the old life style. I need to stop the self sabotage somehow.
I have family coming for a week stay and I am scared as heck that I will throw everything out the window and eat and drink like there is no tomorrow. I know I will need to dig deep, pre-log, and find alternatives to all the merriness happening around me. I do not need to eat and drink like everyone in my surrounding. There are other ways to celebrate than with food and drink.
This thread and all the posters are real life people that have succeeded, that on their journey, and that keep it real with struggle and success. Keep posting... I need this each and everyday.13 -
Like Ann my biggest hangup is mostly about being athletic. Feels fake. Run 25 miles a week, hike 10, do recreational sports, but nope. I just can't wrap my head around being any kind of athletic. The biggest help for me was dog sports -- because I can and do identify as a dog trainer, so the sporty side of dog training is still 'dog training just now with sport'. Nice bridge. Almost makes it, most of the time.
My size was never a part of my identity so being fat didn't change how I see myself/identify myself, and neither did losing the weight. I DO have a few dysmorphia things - get thrown trying to buy clothes/don't want to buy the right size because that doesn't make sense, but no real impostor syndrome. The things I actually DO identify myself as being haven't really changed.
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fatty2begone wrote: »I know I am developing better eating habits, but there are some days it is just impossible to ignore the "old" eating style and indulge and give no care to what I am doing. SELF SABOTAGE. Why? I want to be thin, I want to be healthy, and I do not want to continue the Yo-yo diet forever. And worse, I am not enjoying the food I have chosen to sabotage.
I went through some of this too. Maybe instead of thinking of it as self sabotage (there's a lot of self-blame in those words!), take a look at what is going on when you decide to give up and go back to bad habits. When I did this, I realized that what I was doing was coping with stress or anger or frustration with food. I had to actively replace that inclination with something else. On days that I work from home, I'll choose that moment to work out. If I'm somewhere where working out isn't an option, I make a nice cup of tea instead of hitting the chips. Or, I munch on something healthy, but crunchy (carrots or low-cal rice crackers). Whatever you decide, leave the shame behind. You are human.
Also, if there are foods that you are depriving yourself of for the sake of a "diet", try to figure out ways to make those foods (or reasonable alternatives) fit in your calorie goals occasionally. These changes are lifelong, right? You can't deprive yourself of anything you enjoy for the rest of your life. That's just setting yourself up for failure.
Lastly, I would say that if your "give no care" moments are based on actual hunger, than check your macros. You may need more protein and/or fat in your diet to keep the "hangries" in check.
Hang in there! You've got this!10 -
Wow. I identify with everything all of you have said.
It’s really reassuring to know you feel these ways, too, and that I’m not nuts.
@fatty2begone I get ya. If uncoordination were an Olympic sport, I’d be on alllll the cereal boxes. When my trainer insisted I was an athlete, I’d just laugh at her and roll my eyes in disbelief.
I’d like to make a brief diversion here to proudly show BL’s backside, yet again. These are the new pants bagging on him like this.
Thank god he doesn’t read the boards or he’d have my head on a platter. 😈
We made a quick stop at Target for cheap cat litter to solidify some paint cans the kids want gone from their garage. Busywork for grandparents.
He threw the 25 pound bag over his shoulder and started laughing. “To think I’ve lost this much weight is something else”. Um, you’ve lost more than that, and judging by these baggy three week old britches, it’s time to downsize again.
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I feel so understood! When my 4 year old thought I was all about the vegetables, I felt like maybe she didn't truly know the real me. I had been a heavy kid and yo-yo dieted pretty hard from my teenage years onward being 80lbs heavier at my highest weight. For me, I would say a lot of it is self-doubt. There's a part of me that isn't sure I can keep it off. Recently, my company changed it's name and I was to buy new monogrammed scrubs that would take weeks to be delivered. This was after the holidays and I thought I was overdue for a rebound in weight so I picked a bigger size to be safe. My boss (she's new and doesn't know about my weight history) recently asked me how I could be swimming in the scrubs I just bought. I couldn't explain my rationale without sounding a bit crazy so I lied and said I picked the wrong size. So yeah, a bit of self-doubt going on. Currently waiting for the right sized scrubs to get delivered.
Way to go to your husband! In his case he's too small for his britches!8 -
Wow! I spent the whole day binge reading this thread. Even in the gym on the treadmill, I was scrolling through this thread. I recently moved over here from Noom because I was missing something in the groups. I just found what I was missing!
So many things I read here were reading out of my diary. Thank you @springlering62 for this .
I joined Noom last July and was set at 1200 cal per day. I became obsessed with that number. I lost weight -48 pounds. I also became obsessed with my Apple Watch goals. I travelled - my 50 year high school reunion - a week In Paris - family visits. I gained 2 pounds in Paris, but not on other trips. 1200 cal became my mantra. In January, my hair started falling out by the handfuls. But I kept to staying UNDER 1200 cals. By March I hit my goal of 140, which was a BMI of 21.9. My hair was still falling out, but I didn’t connect it to my diet.
Then I started to loosen up on my calories . Finally my hair stopped falling out, but I quit losing weight. I went into a kind of maintenance mode, albeit unintentionally. since March, my weight has fluctuated up and down the same 3 pounds, which isn’t a bad thing - it’s like maintenance. But I really want to lose another 10 pounds. I have a tiny frame , and I really should be around 130.
I work out ( not like Spring) but at least an hour a day. I will be 69 next month. I need to learn to lose weight, strengthen my body, but not obsess to the point the I lose my hair or other things. All of these issues were discussed in this thread and I am taking time to absorb it all.
As a side benefit, my wife has joined me in this journey. She will be 80 in September, has lost 25 pounds since last summer, and is getting as obsessed with exercise as I got with calories. We go to the gym together nearly every day, but she is sometimes doing twice a day.12 -
@SilverSage1 Welcome to MFP!
You’ve both done terrifically well. You’re both inspiring (and honest!), but to lose 25 and amp up exercise at 80….wow! She is next level. So many people come here wondering is it too late to do anything for themselves at 70 and beyond. She ought to start a thread of her own.
The community here is amazing. There is infinite support and advice here (pause here to thank all you regular posters).
Many of us have the same obsessions with numbers. I was banging away, too, til I “got it” that there is such a thing as Too Low. Apple Watch? Love/Hate, the various digital carrots (closing rings, Challenges, alerts) can be toxic, yet I don’t think I’d have been as successful without it.
My husband is the least OCD person in the world, but he rousted me up to do a three minute walk to close all his rings for the day so he wouldn’t break his streak. I was grateful. (We are visiting the kids and new baby, and completing a killer to-do list, which Apple doesn’t recognize as work, lol.)
Well, I need to get off my *kitten* and go hang a disco ball in the baby’s room. You can’t make this stuff up.8 -
Thank you everyone for opening up your hearts ♥️
I don't consider myself a runner. I'm just an old lady (62) who runs. I do many things: canoe, kayak, dragon boat, ski, snowshoe, hike, yoga, a bit of strength training, but because I don't excel at any of them, I don't consider myself an athlete.
When my son was starting out in his career as a forester he spent his days hiking or snowshoeing every day through acres and acres of trees, up and down the sides of hills and low mountain ranges, wearing a vest full of equipment (and their lunch and drinking water too of course!). The work was done mainly by young, fit men and women. His boss referred to the employees as "industrial athletes". A very fitting term.
So maybe if I can't wrap my head around being an athlete, maybe I can comfortably call myself a recreational athlete. I'm okay with that. Maybe.8 -
ridiculous59 wrote: »Thank you everyone for opening up your hearts ♥️
I don't consider myself a runner. I'm just an old lady (62) who runs. I do many things: canoe, kayak, dragon boat, ski, snowshoe, hike, yoga, a bit of strength training, but because I don't excel at any of them, I don't consider myself an athlete.
When my son was starting out in his career as a forester he spent his days hiking or snowshoeing every day through acres and acres of trees, up and down the sides of hills and low mountain ranges, wearing a vest full of equipment (and their lunch and drinking water too of course!). The work was done mainly by young, fit men and women. His boss referred to the employees as "industrial athletes". A very fitting term.
So maybe if I can't wrap my head around being an athlete, maybe I can comfortably call myself a recreational athlete. I'm okay with that. Maybe.
You're an athlete, in my book.
I don't think that anyone/everyone who does random exercise is necessarily an athlete, even if they do it routinely. I think anyone who takes up a specific physical activity (or activities), practices regularly, and consciously strives to improve their fitness/performance as they do so . . . is an athlete. Recreational, competitive, elite, professional, amateur? Just slightly more specific descriptive adjectives.
Elite status is not required, or even objectively high performance.
There are a few things that would fit that definition, such as dance, that people usually refer to in other ways. That doesn't take away from the athleticism, IMO.
I would say this is "just my opinion", but I think it's not. I think others share the opinion.
It's like people who pursue drawing, painting, sculpture, etc., as non-professionals: They're artists. People who write poems, essays, stories, books - whether published or not - are writers. People who play a musical instrument, sing, keep practicing and working to improve? Musicians.
I don't see how that would not be true. Self-deprecation is endemic and epidemic, though.
/sermon8 -
I was telling a new co-worker that I am a gym rat. I do something cardio-ish for thirty minutes five days a week, and two of those days are in the gym, where I add some strength training. Progress is slow but consistency is pretty good.
Then I thought about it, and revised. I am a gym mouse. But I'm good with that.12 -
Don't sell yourself short. You are more active and athletic than the majority of women your age!ridiculous59 wrote: »Thank you everyone for opening up your hearts ♥️
I don't consider myself a runner. I'm just an old lady (62) who runs. I do many things: canoe, kayak, dragon boat, ski, snowshoe, hike, yoga, a bit of strength training, but because I don't excel at any of them, I don't consider myself an athlete.
Old? At 62? 😵 That must make my wife and I ancient! In our spare time, we lay flooring, tile, hang cabinets, install baseboards, build closets, etc. We refuse to call ourselves old - that's a word I'm not ready to own. (In case you missed that post, we are 68 and 79).8 -
SilverSage1 wrote: »
Don't sell yourself short. You are more active and athletic than the majority of women your age!ridiculous59 wrote: »Thank you everyone for opening up your hearts ♥️
I don't consider myself a runner. I'm just an old lady (62) who runs. I do many things: canoe, kayak, dragon boat, ski, snowshoe, hike, yoga, a bit of strength training, but because I don't excel at any of them, I don't consider myself an athlete.
Old? At 62? 😵 That must make my wife and I ancient! In our spare time, we lay flooring, tile, hang cabinets, install baseboards, build closets, etc. We refuse to call ourselves old - that's a word I'm not ready to own. (In case you missed that post, we are 68 and 79).
FWIW, just a different perspective: I call myself a "li'l ol' lady" at 66, and proudly so.
Impaired abilities, sadly, become statistically more common with increasing age, but they aren't synonyms of age. Treating them as synonyms, IMO, reinforces stereotypes and encourages low (self-)expectations.
My mission is to underscore that "old" can be energetic, lively, curious, strong, active, sharp-minded, . . . . etc.
Even the impairments one may have, at any age - and I do have a few, thankfully mostly minor so far - are better thought of as things to work with, around, over, through or generally past (in some wily way) on the way to goals, as much as possible.
"Old" is good stuff, especially so in my personal world as a cancer survivor and cancer widow.
JMO.8 -
SilverSage1 wrote: »
Don't sell yourself short. You are more active and athletic than the majority of women your age!ridiculous59 wrote: »Thank you everyone for opening up your hearts ♥️
I don't consider myself a runner. I'm just an old lady (62) who runs. I do many things: canoe, kayak, dragon boat, ski, snowshoe, hike, yoga, a bit of strength training, but because I don't excel at any of them, I don't consider myself an athlete.
Old? At 62? 😵 That must make my wife and I ancient! In our spare time, we lay flooring, tile, hang cabinets, install baseboards, build closets, etc. We refuse to call ourselves old - that's a word I'm not ready to own. (In case you missed that post, we are 68 and 79).
FWIW, just a different perspective: I call myself a "li'l ol' lady" at 66, and proudly so.
Impaired abilities, sadly, become statistically more common with increasing age, but they aren't synonyms of age. Treating them as synonyms, IMO, reinforces stereotypes and encourages low (self-)expectations.
My mission is to underscore that "old" can be energetic, lively, curious, strong, active, sharp-minded, . . . . etc.
Even the impairments one may have, at any age - and I do have a few, thankfully mostly minor so far - are better thought of as things to work with, around, over, through or generally past (in some wily way) on the way to goals, as much as possible.
"Old" is good stuff, especially so in my personal world as a cancer survivor and cancer widow.
JMO.
I respectfully see your point. If you notice my screen name (which I have used online for decades) its 2 parts. Silver is a reference to my Snow White hair, which I’ve had for 25 years. Sage is a term for experience and wisdom, usually applied to tribal elders (old people). My niece in law was born in China and refers to my generation as the Elders, which carries a huge amount of respect in her culture. If you find old Internet forums, I’m
Usually just called Sage, or wise one.
I embrace my age. Words have power. Terms like Sage and Elders suggest that I have attained some level of wisdom and earned some modicum of respect. In my background, Old just means old. Aged. It is often paired with terms like old and feeble, or old and decrepit.
I love that you embrace the term old . For me, I am not ready to own it. It carries too much baggage and too many limitations. We all come from different places, but to me, ‘old lady’ is limiting. Words have power.4 -
The calendar now officially says “senior”. The mind, body and heart do not.
I never read instructions anyway. 🤷🏻♀️11 -
We’ve come up with a new plan so we can treat ourselves to something nice every week.
We enjoy the occasional pizza, shawarma, or Mexican meal out, but it’s hard to make them fit.
We’ve started having “early dinner” on Fridays.
We will either skip lunch, or have something super light (a few slices of deli meat on a piece of bread, a pimento cheese sandwich, or a light bowl of soup).
Then we have an early dinner around 3 pm, somewhere we love. Today it’s a local Middle Eastern restaurant.
It’s filling enough to hold us to well past our usual dinner time, and then we’ll have a little extra something something for dessert, which is special, too. I’m debating baklava, but am probably going for pita and baba ganoush. It’s not dessert, but I love it so much, it might as well be.
This gives us the flexibility to have something “heavier” than we usually would. It’s not genius or anything, and not something we’d do every day, but it’s given us a new option so we don’t feel so tied down to what can sometimes feel like a calorie grind.
Thi works particularly well on days when we have an evening event. I’ll be a volunteer cashier for an event this evening that’s catered. Another plus is arriving with a full tummy, and knowing I’ve got a big (and eagerly anticipated) snack waiting when I get home, keeps me out of the hors deouvres in the next room.
Got any similar techniques?9 -
springlering62 wrote: »We’ve come up with a new plan so we can treat ourselves to something nice every week.
We enjoy the occasional pizza, shawarma, or Mexican meal out, but it’s hard to make them fit.
We’ve started having “early dinner” on Fridays.
We will either skip lunch, or have something super light (a few slices of deli meat on a piece of bread, a pimento cheese sandwich, or a light bowl of soup).
Then we have an early dinner around 3 pm, somewhere we love. Today it’s a local Middle Eastern restaurant.
It’s filling enough to hold us to well past our usual dinner time, and then we’ll have a little extra something something for dessert, which is special, too. I’m debating baklava, but am probably going for pita and baba ganoush. It’s not dessert, but I love it so much, it might as well be.
This gives us the flexibility to have something “heavier” than we usually would. It’s not genius or anything, and not something we’d do every day, but it’s given us a new option so we don’t feel so tied down to what can sometimes feel like a calorie grind.
Thi works particularly well on days when we have an evening event. I’ll be a volunteer cashier for an event this evening that’s catered. Another plus is arriving with a full tummy, and knowing I’ve got a big (and eagerly anticipated) snack waiting when I get home, keeps me out of the hors deouvres in the next room.
Got any similar techniques?
That's pretty much why I calorie bank: I eat a small number of calories under maintenance most days (usually 100-150ish), to have calories to spend on an indulgence later. This is my practice in maintenance.
Some people do this in a pattern, like banking on weekdays, spending on weekend. But for me, as a retiree, it's more variable.
I wouldn't think of eating so far under daily calories that it would have an impact on energy or nutrition, but that small amount seems to have negligible impact.
During weight loss, I didn't bank, since I was already in a reasonable calorie deficit. Since I had that deficit, what I usually did instead was manage the frequency and magnitude of indulgences. If they were rare, it didn't matter: I was just delaying reaching goal weight by a day or two. If that 1-2 day delay was triggered once a month (say), it was no big deal.
Because I'm a geek/nerd, I'd actually do the arithmetic, calculate the estimated probable impact, using the "3500 calories over current maintenance calories is at most a pound of fat gain" concept. Most often, this calculation would be after the eating (though I'd typically decided in advance to indulge, as a generality). That after-report would give me hints about how often I could do this (or how much I could indulge in one event), and still stay on a timeline I'd find psychologically satisfying.
Since it's consonant with my nature to have treated weight loss as a fun science fair experiment for grown-ups, this was a natural approach, for me. It wouldn't be so for everyone.
I also do/did what you describe, sometimes, for planned events: Eat more lightly the rest of the day, manage the eating timing differently from usual.
During loss, I did occasionally bank a bit for 3-4 days before a planned event, or maybe fit in some extra activity, to create some compensatory deficit in advance. I'd never try to "make up for it" the day(s) after, unless I was simply not hungry. "Make up for it after" can easily turn into overeat/restrict cycles. With banking in advance, the event balances the books on calories, and there aren't those consequences, for me.
Similarly, for me, extra workouts after "to make up for it" tend to cause fatigue and the usual effects of fatigue on appetite and willpower. If I felt extra energetic after an indulge-y day, I might dial up my routine a little, but not disproportionate to the energy spike. I wouldn't do lots or extra or unusually high-intensity exercise before an event to create extra deficit, because that can backfire for the fatigue reason
Fatigue from over-exercise can be counterproductive for weight loss, generally, I think: We move less in the rest of life when we're tired, perhaps not even noticing that; and it can spike appetite so risk compensatory eating. That's one reason I push back on the myth that punitive, ultra-intense exercise is important for either weight loss or fitness improvement. It isn't.8 -
@springlering62 I have SO enjoyed binge reading this post, please don’t stop writing… I feel the same sadness at reaching page 33 as when you finish a good book!
Also with @AnnPT77 ’s input it’s SUCH a valuable resource for newbies and those of us who’ve been at this a while too.
You even had me looking up Ninja Creamis but I’m trying to persuade myself I’d not end up using it.
I had a cycling accident last year and was forced to stop my regular triathlon training. Normally I train 6 or 7 days a week. I thought I’d gain and be a heffalump in no time but actually my appetite soon reduced right down and actually although I am sure the 6wks off meant I lost muscle mass, I didn’t gain weight compared to pre-accident. And I wasn’t calorie counting at the time.
Just thought I’d throw that out there for anyone who lives in fear that as soon as they stop exercising they’ll overnight pile on the lbs.9
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