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going dutch on a first date

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Replies

  • pastryari
    pastryari Posts: 8,646 Member
    This thread makes me glad that I don't date.

    I'd buy for you in a heartbeat. As long as it was happy hour and $1 beers...

    Be still my heart.
  • aminer31
    aminer31 Posts: 54 Member
    chivalry is dead. he should pay
  • TylerJ76
    TylerJ76 Posts: 4,375 Member
    chivalry is dead. he should pay

    I suppose he should put the toilet seat down too?
    Open the door for you?


    Pfft.
  • rushikareddy
    rushikareddy Posts: 604 Member
    I would love to go Dutch on a first date! But the guys don't like it if I do! They just ignore my offer!
  • haroon_awan
    haroon_awan Posts: 1,208 Member
    chivalry is dead. he should pay

    I suppose he should put the toilet seat down too?
    Open the door for you?


    Pfft.

    HAHAHAHA
  • rushikareddy
    rushikareddy Posts: 604 Member
    chivalry is dead. he should pay

    I suppose he should put the toilet seat down too?
    Open the door for you?


    Pfft.
    Lol hahahaha doesn't matter if he opens the door or puts down the toilet seat, as long as he is a kind and funny guy ! WIT above all lol
  • Cliffslosinit
    Cliffslosinit Posts: 5,044 Member
    This thread makes me glad that I don't date anybody but Cliff.

    Fixed it for you.:love::flowerforyou: :love:

    For the OP, I pay to me it's really no big deal.
    You say "let's go dutch" you could be seen as being cheap.
    If I ask a lady out I'm probably into her....so paying just shows I give a (bleep)
  • concordancia
    concordancia Posts: 5,320 Member
    No.

    This gets me sh1t with the feministy types....of which I am one. But hair, clothes, shoes, makeup....the list goes on and on. These are all things I'm expected to pay for. Most men I know had their parents paying for their clothes up until college and own 3 or 4 pairs of shoes. I think that if I'm expected to dress up to go out on dates or to the bar and I have to pay for all that sh1t, then it's not too crazy to have a few of my drinks paid for or my meal.

    And I'm not going to be a b1tch. If you can't afford my rum and coke or my $7-10 meal, we probably shouldn't be dating. No scrubs.

    But it's funny how the gender norm I agree with is the one where I get free sh1t. Very rarely do gender norms swing towards the ladies.

    Guys are spending more on their clothes and personal hygiene these days.

    So, if a guy can't afford or doesn't want to support you, that makes him a scrub?

    I am saddened that so many women feel they need to put men to the test, as if blowing money on a first date somehow showed how responsible or generous he is. It just shows how flashy he is.

    I still say they have to put the toilet seat down.
  • digitalbill
    digitalbill Posts: 1,410 Member
    The man should ALWAYS pay.
    Always.

    Now that I am married, my wife always pays but, she is the one who balances the bank account and, lets face it,, our money is all combined anyway.
  • Barbellerella
    Barbellerella Posts: 1,838 Member
    I'll pay if I think he's gonna put out.
  • 1ConcreteGirl
    1ConcreteGirl Posts: 3,677 Member
    My take: I never ask guys out, but I think the person who asks is the person who pays, whether that's guy or girl.

    But as Barbellerella said, I'd be willing to pay if I thought he'd put out for me.
  • inskydiamonds
    inskydiamonds Posts: 2,519 Member
    No.

    This gets me sh1t with the feministy types....of which I am one. But hair, clothes, shoes, makeup....the list goes on and on. These are all things I'm expected to pay for. Most men I know had their parents paying for their clothes up until college and own 3 or 4 pairs of shoes. I think that if I'm expected to dress up to go out on dates or to the bar and I have to pay for all that sh1t, then it's not too crazy to have a few of my drinks paid for or my meal.

    And I'm not going to be a b1tch. If you can't afford my rum and coke or my $7-10 meal, we probably shouldn't be dating. No scrubs.

    But it's funny how the gender norm I agree with is the one where I get free sh1t. Very rarely do gender norms swing towards the ladies.

    Guys are spending more on their clothes and personal hygiene these days.

    So, if a guy can't afford or doesn't want to support you, that makes him a scrub?

    I am saddened that so many women feel they need to put men to the test, as if blowing money on a first date somehow showed how responsible or generous he is. It just shows how flashy he is.

    I still say they have to put the toilet seat down.

    I don't understand the contention that guys should have to pay for the date because a girl has to pay to look nice.

    I don't know about anyone else, but I don't do my hair or my makeup or buy my clothes for anyone other than myself. I'm not doing all of these things to attract a future mate. I'm not a peacock or something (though I know the ones that get their tails all displayed are the men..) but anyway, when I dress how I do it's for me, not for anyone else.

    I am rather disgusted at the thought that how women look is to solely impress men and that men should have to pay for a woman because she had to pay to get her hair done.
  • TylerJ76
    TylerJ76 Posts: 4,375 Member
    I'll pay if I think he's gonna put out.

    You really are desperate, aren't you??
  • TylerJ76
    TylerJ76 Posts: 4,375 Member
    My take: I never ask guys out, but I think the person who asks is the person who pays, whether that's guy or girl.

    But as Barbellerella said, I'd be willing to pay if I thought he'd put out for me.

    I would buy for you too. As long as it's 2 for 1's. Then it's like you're getting that *kitten* for free...
  • peacelovelose
    peacelovelose Posts: 63 Member
    I'm totally fine going dutch/paying for both of us on later dates (and I do this in my current relationship) BUT when a guy asks you out for the first time, I find it MUCH more impressive/thoughtful when he pays.
    If I were to ask someone out for the first time, I'd assume I'm the one paying.
  • rushikareddy
    rushikareddy Posts: 604 Member
    No.

    This gets me sh1t with the feministy types....of which I am one. But hair, clothes, shoes, makeup....the list goes on and on. These are all things I'm expected to pay for. Most men I know had their parents paying for their clothes up until college and own 3 or 4 pairs of shoes. I think that if I'm expected to dress up to go out on dates or to the bar and I have to pay for all that sh1t, then it's not too crazy to have a few of my drinks paid for or my meal.

    And I'm not going to be a b1tch. If you can't afford my rum and coke or my $7-10 meal, we probably shouldn't be dating. No scrubs.

    But it's funny how the gender norm I agree with is the one where I get free sh1t. Very rarely do gender norms swing towards the ladies.

    Guys are spending more on their clothes and personal hygiene these days.

    So, if a guy can't afford or doesn't want to support you, that makes him a scrub?

    I am saddened that so many women feel they need to put men to the test, as if blowing money on a first date somehow showed how responsible or generous he is. It just shows how flashy he is.

    I still say they have to put the toilet seat down.

    I don't understand the contention that guys should have to pay for the date because a girl has to pay to look nice.

    I don't know about anyone else, but I don't do my hair or my makeup or buy my clothes for anyone other than myself. I'm not doing all of these things to attract a future mate. I'm not a peacock or something (though I know the ones that get their tails all displayed are the men..) but anyway, when I dress how I do it's for me, not for anyone else.

    I am rather disgusted at the thought that how women look is to solely impress men and that men should have to pay for a woman because she had to pay to get her hair done.
    ^^ agreed!
  • Barbellerella
    Barbellerella Posts: 1,838 Member
    I'll pay if I think he's gonna put out.

    You really are desperate, aren't you??
    I'm not allowed to say "I'm desperate". Apparently that warrants a strike if I do :grumble:
  • _JamieB_
    _JamieB_ Posts: 417 Member
    Definitely don't need a guy to spend money on me to be swept off my feet!
  • digitalbill
    digitalbill Posts: 1,410 Member
    No.

    This gets me sh1t with the feministy types....of which I am one. But hair, clothes, shoes, makeup....the list goes on and on. These are all things I'm expected to pay for. Most men I know had their parents paying for their clothes up until college and own 3 or 4 pairs of shoes. I think that if I'm expected to dress up to go out on dates or to the bar and I have to pay for all that sh1t, then it's not too crazy to have a few of my drinks paid for or my meal.

    And I'm not going to be a b1tch. If you can't afford my rum and coke or my $7-10 meal, we probably shouldn't be dating. No scrubs.

    But it's funny how the gender norm I agree with is the one where I get free sh1t. Very rarely do gender norms swing towards the ladies.

    Guys are spending more on their clothes and personal hygiene these days.

    So, if a guy can't afford or doesn't want to support you, that makes him a scrub?

    I am saddened that so many women feel they need to put men to the test, as if blowing money on a first date somehow showed how responsible or generous he is. It just shows how flashy he is.

    I still say they have to put the toilet seat down.

    I don't understand the contention that guys should have to pay for the date because a girl has to pay to look nice.

    I don't know about anyone else, but I don't do my hair or my makeup or buy my clothes for anyone other than myself. I'm not doing all of these things to attract a future mate. I'm not a peacock or something (though I know the ones that get their tails all displayed are the men..) but anyway, when I dress how I do it's for me, not for anyone else.

    I am rather disgusted at the thought that how women look is to solely impress men and that men should have to pay for a woman because she had to pay to get her hair done.
    No...
    A man pays becanse that is what a man does.
    If a woman has a flat tire and is about to put on the spare.. NO!!!!
    A man will always do that for her.
    A man will do the dirty things although the woman is totally capable of doing it herself.
    That is what a man does.
    And a man pays for the meal when dating.
    Even if she made it perfectly clear that she isn't going to "put out" yet.
    The man picks up the bill.
  • TylerJ76
    TylerJ76 Posts: 4,375 Member
    I'll pay if I think he's gonna put out.

    You really are desperate, aren't you??
    I'm not allowed to say "I'm desperate". Apparently that warrants a strike if I do :grumble:

    I'll buy you dinner at a fancy place like Denny's AND put out...
  • SatchGallamax
    SatchGallamax Posts: 549 Member
    My husband unapologetically used a coupon on one of our first dates. I put out.
  • 1ConcreteGirl
    1ConcreteGirl Posts: 3,677 Member
    I'll pay if I think he's gonna put out.

    You really are desperate, aren't you??
    I'm not allowed to say "I'm desperate". Apparently that warrants a strike if I do :grumble:

    I'll buy you dinner at a fancy place like Denny's AND put out...
    I'd make this a threesome on 2 for 1 night.
  • TylerJ76
    TylerJ76 Posts: 4,375 Member
    I'll pay if I think he's gonna put out.

    You really are desperate, aren't you??
    I'm not allowed to say "I'm desperate". Apparently that warrants a strike if I do :grumble:

    I'll buy you dinner at a fancy place like Denny's AND put out...
    I'd make this a threesome on 2 for 1 night.


    This is going to be THE BEST DATE EVER.
  • Barbellerella
    Barbellerella Posts: 1,838 Member
    I'll pay if I think he's gonna put out.

    You really are desperate, aren't you??
    I'm not allowed to say "I'm desperate". Apparently that warrants a strike if I do :grumble:

    I'll buy you dinner at a fancy place like Denny's AND put out...
    tumblr_lxcsi9NdiK1ql5yr7o1_400.gif
  • inskydiamonds
    inskydiamonds Posts: 2,519 Member
    No.

    This gets me sh1t with the feministy types....of which I am one. But hair, clothes, shoes, makeup....the list goes on and on. These are all things I'm expected to pay for. Most men I know had their parents paying for their clothes up until college and own 3 or 4 pairs of shoes. I think that if I'm expected to dress up to go out on dates or to the bar and I have to pay for all that sh1t, then it's not too crazy to have a few of my drinks paid for or my meal.

    And I'm not going to be a b1tch. If you can't afford my rum and coke or my $7-10 meal, we probably shouldn't be dating. No scrubs.

    But it's funny how the gender norm I agree with is the one where I get free sh1t. Very rarely do gender norms swing towards the ladies.

    Guys are spending more on their clothes and personal hygiene these days.

    So, if a guy can't afford or doesn't want to support you, that makes him a scrub?

    I am saddened that so many women feel they need to put men to the test, as if blowing money on a first date somehow showed how responsible or generous he is. It just shows how flashy he is.

    I still say they have to put the toilet seat down.

    I don't understand the contention that guys should have to pay for the date because a girl has to pay to look nice.

    I don't know about anyone else, but I don't do my hair or my makeup or buy my clothes for anyone other than myself. I'm not doing all of these things to attract a future mate. I'm not a peacock or something (though I know the ones that get their tails all displayed are the men..) but anyway, when I dress how I do it's for me, not for anyone else.

    I am rather disgusted at the thought that how women look is to solely impress men and that men should have to pay for a woman because she had to pay to get her hair done.
    No...
    A man pays becanse that is what a man does.
    If a woman has a flat tire and is about to put on the spare.. NO!!!!
    A man will always do that for her.
    A man will do the dirty things although the woman is totally capable of doing it herself.
    That is what a man does.
    And a man pays for the meal when dating.
    Even if she made it perfectly clear that she isn't going to "put out" yet.
    The man picks up the bill.

    Ew. I would never be with a man who thought I was somehow incapable of changing my own spare, or getting myself dirty, and of paying my own way.


    That is so uncharming and so unappealing.

    I would appreciate a guy who offered a help, but not a man who thinks I am incapable of doing these things on my own.
  • TylerJ76
    TylerJ76 Posts: 4,375 Member
    Ew. I would never be with a man who thought I was somehow incapable of changing my own spare, or getting myself dirty, and of paying my own way.


    That is so uncharming and so unappealing.

    I would appreciate a guy who offered a help, but not a man who thinks I am incapable of doing these things on my own.

    I like you.
  • inskydiamonds
    inskydiamonds Posts: 2,519 Member
    Ew. I would never be with a man who thought I was somehow incapable of changing my own spare, or getting myself dirty, and of paying my own way.


    That is so uncharming and so unappealing.

    I would appreciate a guy who offered a help, but not a man who thinks I am incapable of doing these things on my own.

    I like you.

    :P
  • concordancia
    concordancia Posts: 5,320 Member
    No.

    This gets me sh1t with the feministy types....of which I am one. But hair, clothes, shoes, makeup....the list goes on and on. These are all things I'm expected to pay for. Most men I know had their parents paying for their clothes up until college and own 3 or 4 pairs of shoes. I think that if I'm expected to dress up to go out on dates or to the bar and I have to pay for all that sh1t, then it's not too crazy to have a few of my drinks paid for or my meal.

    And I'm not going to be a b1tch. If you can't afford my rum and coke or my $7-10 meal, we probably shouldn't be dating. No scrubs.

    But it's funny how the gender norm I agree with is the one where I get free sh1t. Very rarely do gender norms swing towards the ladies.

    Guys are spending more on their clothes and personal hygiene these days.

    So, if a guy can't afford or doesn't want to support you, that makes him a scrub?

    I am saddened that so many women feel they need to put men to the test, as if blowing money on a first date somehow showed how responsible or generous he is. It just shows how flashy he is.

    I still say they have to put the toilet seat down.

    I don't understand the contention that guys should have to pay for the date because a girl has to pay to look nice.

    I don't know about anyone else, but I don't do my hair or my makeup or buy my clothes for anyone other than myself. I'm not doing all of these things to attract a future mate. I'm not a peacock or something (though I know the ones that get their tails all displayed are the men..) but anyway, when I dress how I do it's for me, not for anyone else.

    I am rather disgusted at the thought that how women look is to solely impress men and that men should have to pay for a woman because she had to pay to get her hair done.
    No...
    A man pays becanse that is what a man does.
    If a woman has a flat tire and is about to put on the spare.. NO!!!!
    A man will always do that for her.
    A man will do the dirty things although the woman is totally capable of doing it herself.
    That is what a man does.
    And a man pays for the meal when dating.
    Even if she made it perfectly clear that she isn't going to "put out" yet.
    The man picks up the bill.

    If I haven't changed my tire by the time you realize it is flat, it is because a lug nut has seized and it requires power tools. But a big thanks to the man who broke my tire iron trying to prove that he could do it.
  • digitalbill
    digitalbill Posts: 1,410 Member
    No.

    This gets me sh1t with the feministy types....of which I am one. But hair, clothes, shoes, makeup....the list goes on and on. These are all things I'm expected to pay for. Most men I know had their parents paying for their clothes up until college and own 3 or 4 pairs of shoes. I think that if I'm expected to dress up to go out on dates or to the bar and I have to pay for all that sh1t, then it's not too crazy to have a few of my drinks paid for or my meal.

    And I'm not going to be a b1tch. If you can't afford my rum and coke or my $7-10 meal, we probably shouldn't be dating. No scrubs.

    But it's funny how the gender norm I agree with is the one where I get free sh1t. Very rarely do gender norms swing towards the ladies.

    Guys are spending more on their clothes and personal hygiene these days.

    So, if a guy can't afford or doesn't want to support you, that makes him a scrub?

    I am saddened that so many women feel they need to put men to the test, as if blowing money on a first date somehow showed how responsible or generous he is. It just shows how flashy he is.

    I still say they have to put the toilet seat down.

    I don't understand the contention that guys should have to pay for the date because a girl has to pay to look nice.

    I don't know about anyone else, but I don't do my hair or my makeup or buy my clothes for anyone other than myself. I'm not doing all of these things to attract a future mate. I'm not a peacock or something (though I know the ones that get their tails all displayed are the men..) but anyway, when I dress how I do it's for me, not for anyone else.

    I am rather disgusted at the thought that how women look is to solely impress men and that men should have to pay for a woman because she had to pay to get her hair done.
    No...
    A man pays becanse that is what a man does.
    If a woman has a flat tire and is about to put on the spare.. NO!!!!
    A man will always do that for her.
    A man will do the dirty things although the woman is totally capable of doing it herself.
    That is what a man does.
    And a man pays for the meal when dating.
    Even if she made it perfectly clear that she isn't going to "put out" yet.
    The man picks up the bill.

    Ew. I would never be with a man who thought I was somehow incapable of changing my own spare, or getting myself dirty, and of paying my own way.


    That is so uncharming and so unappealing.

    I would appreciate a guy who offered a help, but not a man who thinks I am incapable of doing these things on my own.
    You must have missed this part:

    "A man will do the dirty things although the woman is totally capable of doing it herself"

    I suppose I am still just a bit old fashoned.
    But, the "charm" of it has yet to fail me.
    Well, I wouldn't know anymore since I have been off the market for over 14 years but, it worked in the past.
  • DontStopB_Leakin
    DontStopB_Leakin Posts: 3,863 Member
    No.

    This gets me sh1t with the feministy types....of which I am one. But hair, clothes, shoes, makeup....the list goes on and on. These are all things I'm expected to pay for. Most men I know had their parents paying for their clothes up until college and own 3 or 4 pairs of shoes. I think that if I'm expected to dress up to go out on dates or to the bar and I have to pay for all that sh1t, then it's not too crazy to have a few of my drinks paid for or my meal.

    And I'm not going to be a b1tch. If you can't afford my rum and coke or my $7-10 meal, we probably shouldn't be dating. No scrubs.

    But it's funny how the gender norm I agree with is the one where I get free sh1t. Very rarely do gender norms swing towards the ladies.

    Guys are spending more on their clothes and personal hygiene these days.

    So, if a guy can't afford or doesn't want to support you, that makes him a scrub?

    I am saddened that so many women feel they need to put men to the test, as if blowing money on a first date somehow showed how responsible or generous he is. It just shows how flashy he is.

    I still say they have to put the toilet seat down.

    I don't understand the contention that guys should have to pay for the date because a girl has to pay to look nice.

    I don't know about anyone else, but I don't do my hair or my makeup or buy my clothes for anyone other than myself. I'm not doing all of these things to attract a future mate. I'm not a peacock or something (though I know the ones that get their tails all displayed are the men..) but anyway, when I dress how I do it's for me, not for anyone else.

    I am rather disgusted at the thought that how women look is to solely impress men and that men should have to pay for a woman because she had to pay to get her hair done.
    No...
    A man pays becanse that is what a man does.
    If a woman has a flat tire and is about to put on the spare.. NO!!!!
    A man will always do that for her.
    A man will do the dirty things although the woman is totally capable of doing it herself.
    That is what a man does.
    And a man pays for the meal when dating.
    Even if she made it perfectly clear that she isn't going to "put out" yet.
    The man picks up the bill.

    If I haven't changed my tire by the time you realize it is flat, it is because a lug nut has seized and it requires power tools. But a big thanks to the man who broke my tire iron trying to prove that he could do it.
    And owned.


    Seriously, bro. I got this. I'll change my own damn tire, but thanks.
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