Unsupportive....wwyd?

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  • MJEekhoff
    MJEekhoff Posts: 58
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    Five years together or not, dump his *kitten*. You deserve better.
  • AABru
    AABru Posts: 610 Member
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    You are adorable! There are men that would eat you up in a second. Allow him the chance for therapy and then make your choice. If he refuses, he's already made hsi choice. I'm so sorry...
  • LifestyleChange33
    LifestyleChange33 Posts: 169 Member
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    If you told your spouse that you wanted to lose weight, get into better shape and they immediately got on the defensive.. Saying you are doing it to cheat/move on/ect.. And totally have zero support for you, try to do things to make you go off track.


    Start blowing up at you for the tiniest things.

    Example.
    You forget to take chicken out for supper, immediately they start yelling saying things like you're a fat,lazy tub of lard... Stretched out and better treat him better cause no one else will ever love you.. You're ugly and everyone else can see it, why even bother..



    You have been with this person for well over 5 years and have kids together... WWYD?

    That is not unsupportive, that is ABUSIVE.

    This is not a recommendation because I do not know the details, etc... but if you were me or one of my daughters I would tell you to require counseling and/or LEAVE LEAVE LEAVE. NO man should EVER treat his wife like that. I would rather be alone telling myself that I am beautiful than have anyone tell me I'm ugly- let alone the man who was supposed to love me for the rest of my life. I am soo sorry you are going through this but lady, you are in an abusive relationship. If he won't go to counseling with you, then get it for yourself.

    I've been there in my own version of that kind of hell, and leaving was the most difficult thing I had ever done. It turns out, it was also the best thing I could have done for myself and my children (what we expose our children to becomes their normal, and what they will seek for themselves when they are grown).

    1. DONT BELIEVE HIM. You are capable, strong, and doing good for yourself and your family. I wish you all the best.
  • Diary_Queen
    Diary_Queen Posts: 1,314 Member
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    OMG... i have been there and it is not worth it. No person should ever be spoken to that way. I would have been gone so fast that must dust would've already settled
  • Qskim
    Qskim Posts: 1,145 Member
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    If u think u can't leave him now...prepare for the day..gradually take a few essentials for you and kids to a trusted friends house, start put a small amount of money away week to week where he can't find it...here and there pack items u think he won't miss and store them ready - extra sheets, towels, photos n treasures. A survival kit at the ready. Wrote a diary of his behavior. This is only if u think the consequences of leaving him are frightening n quite honestly he sounds a little scary.
  • Pimpmonkey
    Pimpmonkey Posts: 566
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    If you told your spouse that you wanted to lose weight, get into better shape and they immediately got on the defensive.. Saying you are doing it to cheat/move on/ect.. And totally have zero support for you, try to do things to make you go off track.


    Start blowing up at you for the tiniest things.

    Example.
    You forget to take chicken out for supper, immediately they start yelling saying things like you're a fat,lazy tub of lard... Stretched out and better treat him better cause no one else will ever love you.. You're ugly and everyone else can see it, why even bother..



    You have been with this person for well over 5 years and have kids together... WWYD?
    Well, right off the bat he'd have some frozen chicken shoved up his a@@!
  • mom2dms
    mom2dms Posts: 152 Member
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    tell him it is now his job to cook the meals
  • ChristieDF
    ChristieDF Posts: 178 Member
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    We aren't married.. Engaged.




    And I think I might have to go find myself a wife :-P


    No brainer run fast. You will find someone else. You deserve better. I don't know you but, I will pray for strength and safety. Get your self-esteem and leave.
  • skonly
    skonly Posts: 371
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    Put his belongings in the yard and have a locksmith come over before he gets home. I did that in my 20's to someone. I heard a few years ago he still hates me. lol
  • bonniecarbs
    bonniecarbs Posts: 446 Member
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    Be honest on this one, do you love him so much that you can't stand the thought of being without him? Is that why you permit that kind of behavior in a family? Its almost 2012 young lady, better change things real quick, they December 2012 is the "end of days" (just joking, I hope not). If you don't find someone else as soon as you think you need to, what's wrong with being with YOU for a while until you meet someone who isn't abusive and who respects you and respects your children? Staying in abusive relationships is so 1920s to 1980s. Get with the time and be your own woman. Experience speaks here, wasted no time getting out.
  • ChristieDF
    ChristieDF Posts: 178 Member
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    I hate to say it but to me if you marry this guy things might get worse. Don't do it. Do yall live together?
  • 1PoisonIvy
    1PoisonIvy Posts: 879 Member
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    DIVORCE, you don't need to be with someone like that, no matter how long u've been together and it isnt a healthy environment for kids to grow up in anyway. A person cannot say those things to a person that they are supposed to love and care about

    Ii agree........................
    Mine isn't supportive either, but NOBODY should talk to their spouse like that, those are not words from somebody that truly loves you.
  • postrockandcats
    postrockandcats Posts: 1,145 Member
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    I'm not going through 7 pages of comments, but you say you're afraid you won't find anyone if you leave? Good gravy, woman! Who cares about the NEXT guy! Cross that bridge when you get to it! Concentrate about what you're going to do NOW. If this is even a hint at how he is with you, you should leave NOW. Right the heck now. Do not pass go, do not collect $200, get your kids, your cat, the Gerbil and run.
  • tmoore_20
    tmoore_20 Posts: 49 Member
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    He's mentally abusive. Leave him alone. He's insecure about you losing weight because he know you will feel better about yourself and he will no longer have mental control over your new found confidence. **** him
  • bonniecarbs
    bonniecarbs Posts: 446 Member
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    yes, what postrockandca said
  • ChristieDF
    ChristieDF Posts: 178 Member
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    You're still in your 20s move on PLEASE!!
  • bonniecarbs
    bonniecarbs Posts: 446 Member
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    yes, what christiedf said
  • PrettyGirlPayton
    PrettyGirlPayton Posts: 93 Member
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    You couldn't have said it better....I think that's what he is doing.. If he's not then he is just a horrible person
  • PrettyGirlPayton
    PrettyGirlPayton Posts: 93 Member
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    LMBO!!!! I am from Mississippi too! Girl you a mess.hahahahhahaha
  • zCarsAndCaloriesz
    zCarsAndCaloriesz Posts: 348
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    If it were me?


    I would leave his *kitten* because both me and my kids deserve better, and they shouldn't have to grow up seeing that.

    But that is just what I would do. No one deserves that treatment, especially from their other half!!

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