Harming children to make yourself feel good?

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  • yo_andi
    yo_andi Posts: 2,178 Member
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    My father's mother and grandmother did this to me, fed me candy bars, cookies, whatever I wanted that was loaded with sugar, because they had a grudge against my mother. But it's me who is paying the price and I feel like I have an addiction to sugar and have battled with my weight all my life. People really don't realize the damage they can do to children.

    You poor thing! They completely ruined your life and took away all of your willpower!





    /sarcasm. Get a grip.
  • Marcia315
    Marcia315 Posts: 460 Member
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    This might be allowed...

    puritan-stew.jpg

    Do I even want to know what a "formed beef chunk" is?
  • ndj1979
    ndj1979 Posts: 29,136 Member
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    damn, I should of jumped in ealier..late to show..
  • RozayJones
    RozayJones Posts: 409 Member
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    Some of these threads.....:noway:
  • nainai0585
    nainai0585 Posts: 199 Member
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    Reading just the first 3 pages lets me know there are A LOT of childless people/trolls/misunderstanding the OP commenting.

    The OP is NOT saying her children are not allowed to EVER have sweets, candy, chocolate, etc. She is simply saying ASK THE PARENTS FIRST!! Its that simple.
    I am a parent. And I have been a parent a lot longer than the OP has been a parent.

    Good for you.
    You accused people who disagreed with the OP of not being parents.

    I point out that at least one of the people disagreeing with the OP is a parent and this is your answer?

    Make up your mind. It matters or it doesn't. You don't get to have it both ways.
    Allow me to break my simple, 2 sentence comment for you into small portions:
    Reading just the first 3 pages lets me know there are A LOT of childless people/trolls/misunderstanding the OP commenting.
    - As you can see, childless people, trolls, AND people misunderstanding the OP are commenting and attacking the OP (you obviously fall into the MISUNDERSTANDING category since you clearly misunderstood me not once, but twice.

    The OP is NOT saying her children are not allowed to EVER have sweets, candy, chocolate, etc. She is simply saying ASK THE PARENTS FIRST!! Its that simple.
    - Since there where SO FEW commenters who actually understood what the OP was trying to say (those people may only fill 1 to 2 pages) I felt it was necessary to CLARIFY what he/she was trying to tell all those people who DID NOT UNDERSTAND/ARE TROLLS/CHILDLESS PEOPLE who have NEVER experienced having to care for children for long periods of time.

    Do you finally understand or should I break this down more for you?

    Actually, I don't disagree with the OP.

    I do, however, disagree with the OP's sensationalistic rationale that the children will be harmed if they eat something that a parent has not given them permission to eat.

    I am a parent. I have set rules, and I have had family members break them. It's crappy, but it's not an overly big deal, and the OP is kind of crappy for turning this mole hill into a mountain.

    I don't believe she is implying that the children will be harmed by the treats - which is where A LOT of people misunderstood her - she is simply saying to not give the child a treat just to make yourself fell better.
    Yes, the title is misleading and probably not the one she intended or the one she thought would cause such a slew of misunderstanding.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
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    I don't believe she is implying that the children will be harmed by the treats - which is where A LOT of people misunderstood her - she is simply saying to not give the child a treat just to make yourself fell better.
    Yes, the title is misleading and probably not the one she intended or the one she thought would cause such a slew of misunderstanding.

    Directly from the OP:
    If you're going around Mom and Dad to feed them high calorie, nutritionally void food - you're getting your own, warm, fuzzy, heart warming smile, "thank you," and, "I love you," AT THEIR EXPENSE - in straight, harsh terms: YOU ARE HARMING THEM TO MAKE YOURSELF FEEL GOOD. STOP.
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,229 Member
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    Reading just the first 3 pages lets me know there are A LOT of childless people/trolls/misunderstanding the OP commenting.

    The OP is NOT saying her children are not allowed to EVER have sweets, candy, chocolate, etc. She is simply saying ASK THE PARENTS FIRST!! Its that simple.
    I am a parent. And I have been a parent a lot longer than the OP has been a parent.

    Good for you.
    You accused people who disagreed with the OP of not being parents.

    I point out that at least one of the people disagreeing with the OP is a parent and this is your answer?

    Make up your mind. It matters or it doesn't. You don't get to have it both ways.
    Allow me to break my simple, 2 sentence comment for you into small portions:
    Reading just the first 3 pages lets me know there are A LOT of childless people/trolls/misunderstanding the OP commenting.
    - As you can see, childless people, trolls, AND people misunderstanding the OP are commenting and attacking the OP (you obviously fall into the MISUNDERSTANDING category since you clearly misunderstood me not once, but twice.

    The OP is NOT saying her children are not allowed to EVER have sweets, candy, chocolate, etc. She is simply saying ASK THE PARENTS FIRST!! Its that simple.
    - Since there where SO FEW commenters who actually understood what the OP was trying to say (those people may only fill 1 to 2 pages) I felt it was necessary to CLARIFY what he/she was trying to tell all those people who DID NOT UNDERSTAND/ARE TROLLS/CHILDLESS PEOPLE who have NEVER experienced having to care for children for long periods of time.

    Do you finally understand or should I break this down more for you?

    Actually, I don't disagree with the OP.

    I do, however, disagree with the OP's sensationalistic rationale that the children will be harmed if they eat something that a parent has not given them permission to eat.

    I am a parent. I have set rules, and I have had family members break them. It's crappy, but it's not an overly big deal, and the OP is kind of crappy for turning this mole hill into a mountain.

    I don't believe she is implying that the children will be harmed by the treats - which is where A LOT of people misunderstood her - she is simply saying to not give the child a treat just to make yourself fell better.
    Yes, the title is misleading and probably not the one she intended or the one she thought would cause such a slew of misunderstanding.

    The OP said the following in the very last sentence of her post:
    in straight, harsh terms: YOU ARE HARMING THEM TO MAKE YOURSELF FEEL GOOD. STOP.

    The meaning of her post is pretty clear. It's not just in the title. She summed herself up with this statement. It's pretty accusatory and straight-forward... and ridiculously over-dramatic.
  • ndj1979
    ndj1979 Posts: 29,136 Member
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    People I don't want to be around during the holidays (or any other time): sugar Nazis.

    It's one thing to not let your kids eat candy every day. It's entirely another to tell your kids' grandparents and aunts and uncle not to give them a freaking cookie at Christmas. Unless your kid has an allergy, I think you should get over it.

    this x a million
  • DamePiglet
    DamePiglet Posts: 3,730 Member
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    Grandparents and aunties especially, and friends and relatives everywhere - please, please, please, please, please ask parents first BEFORE offering children sweets and treats!!!!! And NEVER sneak them treats when parents say no.

    Of course you're not harming them on purpose, but a diet with too many cookies, cakes, candy and sweets is never good for anyone, especially children, especially when they are busy - and there are a lot of "special visits" during the holidays, so your offer might be a child's sixth cookie for the day.

    Kids don't yet have the ability to make considered choices about their nutrition; their parents do. If you're going around Mom and Dad to feed them high calorie, nutritionally void food - you're getting your own, warm, fuzzy, heart warming smile, "thank you," and, "I love you," AT THEIR EXPENSE - in straight, harsh terms: YOU ARE HARMING THEM TO MAKE YOURSELF FEEL GOOD. STOP.

    Okay, the topic sentence is pretty sensational. LOLz at that.

    If it's a day or two "special visit" and the child doesn't have sensitivities, 6 cookies might not be a big deal.

    One thing that would bother me (and did) is that some parents have custody agreements where a parent may have a child for an extended period of time (over the summer, a week or more over the holidays, etc) and during that time don't provide the child with food with nutritional value, or have it on hand, but allow the child to eat nothing but "empty calories".

    Some people really are that extreme and that's not a good thing.
  • ndj1979
    ndj1979 Posts: 29,136 Member
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    why do I have the feeling that OP hands out carrot sticks at Halloween....
  • Mr_Knight
    Mr_Knight Posts: 9,532 Member
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    Grandparents and aunties especially, and friends and relatives everywhere - please, please, please, please, please ask parents first BEFORE offering children sweets and treats!!!!! And NEVER sneak them treats when parents say no.

    To be perfectly frank, I would be disappointed if my children's grandparents didn't spoil my kids a bit, behind my back and against my wishes.
  • nainai0585
    nainai0585 Posts: 199 Member
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    Reading just the first 3 pages lets me know there are A LOT of childless people/trolls/misunderstanding the OP commenting.

    The OP is NOT saying her children are not allowed to EVER have sweets, candy, chocolate, etc. She is simply saying ASK THE PARENTS FIRST!! Its that simple.
    I am a parent. And I have been a parent a lot longer than the OP has been a parent.

    Good for you.
    You accused people who disagreed with the OP of not being parents.

    I point out that at least one of the people disagreeing with the OP is a parent and this is your answer?

    Make up your mind. It matters or it doesn't. You don't get to have it both ways.
    Allow me to break my simple, 2 sentence comment for you into small portions:
    Reading just the first 3 pages lets me know there are A LOT of childless people/trolls/misunderstanding the OP commenting.
    - As you can see, childless people, trolls, AND people misunderstanding the OP are commenting and attacking the OP (you obviously fall into the MISUNDERSTANDING category since you clearly misunderstood me not once, but twice.

    The OP is NOT saying her children are not allowed to EVER have sweets, candy, chocolate, etc. She is simply saying ASK THE PARENTS FIRST!! Its that simple.
    - Since there where SO FEW commenters who actually understood what the OP was trying to say (those people may only fill 1 to 2 pages) I felt it was necessary to CLARIFY what he/she was trying to tell all those people who DID NOT UNDERSTAND/ARE TROLLS/CHILDLESS PEOPLE who have NEVER experienced having to care for children for long periods of time.

    Do you finally understand or should I break this down more for you?
    So you are the only one who understood the OP?

    No of course not, but myself and a very select few seem to be able to read between the lines and understand the meaning of the post without going off on a tangent and becoming trolls or attacking the post and the poster.

    We understand this:
    1) ASK THE PARENT FIRST before giving the child a treat or other food product. WHY? Dietary restrictions, religious or cultural restrictions, medications, allergies, etc.
    2) DON'T GIVE FOOD TO A CHILD JUST TO MAKE YOURSELF FEEL BETTER. Why? Because your need to 'feel better about yourself by feeding the child WITHOUT ASKING THE PARENT' could either cause some type of adverse reaction to the child OR could potentially kill them (take SEVERE allergies as an example).

    Common people, this is not rocket science, its common sense. Just ask the parent if its ok, in most cases it is, in others its not. Don't take it as an attack to your person, but simple as a parent putting their child's BEST INTEREST first before your moral gratitude.
  • DamePiglet
    DamePiglet Posts: 3,730 Member
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    Grandparents and aunties especially, and friends and relatives everywhere - please, please, please, please, please ask parents first BEFORE offering children sweets and treats!!!!! And NEVER sneak them treats when parents say no.

    To be perfectly frank, I would be disappointed if my children's grandparents didn't spoil my kids a bit, behind my back and against my wishes.

    That's my plan! Now if my kids would just cooperate and gimme grandbehbehs!!!
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
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    No of course not, but myself and a very select few seem to be able to read between the lines and understand the meaning of the post without going off on a tangent and becoming trolls or attacking the post and the poster.

    So most of us read what she actually wrote (see excerpts above) and a few others "read between the lines," and the rest of us don't actually understand the OP? But the people who read what she didn't actually write understand the OP?

    I got ya.

    Shame on me for, you know, reading what she wrote and assuming she meant it. You're just so much smarter than the rest of us. :flowerforyou:
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,229 Member
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    Reading just the first 3 pages lets me know there are A LOT of childless people/trolls/misunderstanding the OP commenting.

    The OP is NOT saying her children are not allowed to EVER have sweets, candy, chocolate, etc. She is simply saying ASK THE PARENTS FIRST!! Its that simple.
    I am a parent. And I have been a parent a lot longer than the OP has been a parent.

    Good for you.
    You accused people who disagreed with the OP of not being parents.

    I point out that at least one of the people disagreeing with the OP is a parent and this is your answer?

    Make up your mind. It matters or it doesn't. You don't get to have it both ways.
    Allow me to break my simple, 2 sentence comment for you into small portions:
    Reading just the first 3 pages lets me know there are A LOT of childless people/trolls/misunderstanding the OP commenting.
    - As you can see, childless people, trolls, AND people misunderstanding the OP are commenting and attacking the OP (you obviously fall into the MISUNDERSTANDING category since you clearly misunderstood me not once, but twice.

    The OP is NOT saying her children are not allowed to EVER have sweets, candy, chocolate, etc. She is simply saying ASK THE PARENTS FIRST!! Its that simple.
    - Since there where SO FEW commenters who actually understood what the OP was trying to say (those people may only fill 1 to 2 pages) I felt it was necessary to CLARIFY what he/she was trying to tell all those people who DID NOT UNDERSTAND/ARE TROLLS/CHILDLESS PEOPLE who have NEVER experienced having to care for children for long periods of time.

    Do you finally understand or should I break this down more for you?
    So you are the only one who understood the OP?

    No of course not, but myself and a very select few seem to be able to read between the lines and understand the meaning of the post without going off on a tangent and becoming trolls or attacking the post and the poster.

    We understand this:
    1) ASK THE PARENT FIRST before giving the child a treat or other food product. WHY? Dietary restrictions, religious or cultural restrictions, medications, allergies, etc.
    2) DON'T GIVE FOOD TO A CHILD JUST TO MAKE YOURSELF FEEL BETTER. Why? Because your need to 'feel better about yourself by feeding the child WITHOUT ASKING THE PARENT' could either cause some type of adverse reaction to the child OR could potentially kill them (take SEVERE allergies as an example).

    Common people, this is not rocket science, its common sense. Just ask the parent if its ok, in most cases it is, in others its not. Don't take it as an attack to your person, but simple as a parent putting their child's BEST INTEREST first before your moral gratitude.

    Sorry... but I have tendency to believe that people mean what they say, and say what they mean.

    The point of her post was to be inflammatory, generate controversy, and attract the general nonsense that comes when someone feels it necessary to use the forums to impose their own perspective on other people's behavior.
  • QuietBloom
    QuietBloom Posts: 5,413 Member
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    I thought this was going to be a post about munchausen syndrome by proxy. Because, harming children? Seriously?
  • NinjadURbacon
    NinjadURbacon Posts: 395 Member
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    Just want to see how this goes.
  • nainai0585
    nainai0585 Posts: 199 Member
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    I don't believe she is implying that the children will be harmed by the treats - which is where A LOT of people misunderstood her - she is simply saying to not give the child a treat just to make yourself fell better.
    Yes, the title is misleading and probably not the one she intended or the one she thought would cause such a slew of misunderstanding.

    Directly from the OP:
    If you're going around Mom and Dad to feed them high calorie, nutritionally void food - you're getting your own, warm, fuzzy, heart warming smile, "thank you," and, "I love you," AT THEIR EXPENSE - in straight, harsh terms: YOU ARE HARMING THEM TO MAKE YOURSELF FEEL GOOD. STOP.

    By going behind the parents back, you could potentially kill the child due to severe allergies (some are unknown at the time, like the earlier post of the 6 month old who was fed a peanut butter cup and suffered a severe allergy attack, causing the parents to spend the night in the ER). There can also be the adverse effect of the extreme sugar rush in some children, or terrible stomach aches. What about the religious or cultural restrictions that do not allow certain foods to be consumed? Are you aware of all the medication or dietary restrictions the child has, certain foods/ingredients may not be allowed due to their effect on the medication or the child's doctor has stated that the child cannot consume anything with that product in it.

    You may very well be harming the child just to make yourself feel better that you had given them something to eat.
  • psychdlc
    psychdlc Posts: 27 Member
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    Harming children always makes me feel good.