Is Partying Worth It?

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Replies

  • skinnyinnotime
    skinnyinnotime Posts: 4,078 Member
    IMO partying IS worth it...I am 45 and still like to party! :)
  • simon0000
    simon0000 Posts: 1,432 Member
    ^^this, although i'm not quite 45 ;)
  • malavika413
    malavika413 Posts: 474 Member
    I just informed my boyfriend that at the next opportunity, I'm going to attend a party but be responsible about it. We'll see what he has to say. No regrets!
  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,865 Member
    edited November 2014
    I'm 40 and still party on the weekends...it's worth it to me. It hasn't stopped me from kicking *kitten* and being awesome either.
  • MonicaA2013
    MonicaA2013 Posts: 753 Member
    Hey y'all. I'm just asking a question to the peanut gallery, trying to get a variety of opinions.

    I'm nearly 20 and a college student. I have a lot of friends that like to party on the weekends (dorm parties, since there's no greek life at my school), and they always invite me. I've never gone, but I'm very curious. However, there are a few reasons that I've held back. I've never had a sip of alcohol in my life, so I don't know how I'd react to it. I don't know what to wear. I have a boyfriend that's very against alcohol and partying, and I'd either have to go behind his back or go knowing he'd be worried about me and my safety. Also, most girls go to parties to flirt with guys, which would dismay my boyfriend. I'm not attractive, so no one would hit on me, but still.

    Is it worth going to a college party at least once? My friends really want me to go and experience it, and I am curious. What do you think?

    OK... so what you do is dress casual and invite BF with you. If he decides not to go then you can go with the understanding that he can stop in anytime he likes to make sure you are ok. And that if you feel uncomfortable then you will call him and ask that he pick you up.
    As for Drinking.... I don't think it would be the best idea to start drinking in that situation. If you decide you want to try alcohol do it in your own space with someone who can help you if anything goes wrong. I understand wanting to make BF happy and all but you also must think of yourself. Don't hold yourself back from experiences for someone else's happiness. Go or don't but make the choice for yourself not others. GOOD LUCK

    I'd invite him along, but boys don't typically attend these parties unless they're the hosts or friends of the guys hosting. I go to a school with single-sex dorms, so these parties revolve around "girls allowed, boys stay out". It sucks.

    Seams to me you don't really want to go. If you really wanted to check this atmosphere out you would make sure that everyone would be OK with whatever the situation came to be. You have been given SEVERAL ways of making this a great experience for yourself and you have come up with a reason that it wont work. So i would say don't do anything at all for the rest of your life unless "SOMEONE" gives you their approval. Then later in life you can blame everything on someone else if you end up not happy. I know this is harsh but it is what i see down the road for you if you continue on this path. Step out on your own or sit home and do nothing unless given permission. Best of Luck to you in your choices.
  • salembambi
    salembambi Posts: 5,585 Member
    salembambi wrote: »
    by the time I was 18 I was at the bars at least 4 times a week
    sooooo I think you should for sure go and have fun also go slow with the drinking you don't have to be wasted off your *kitten* pissing everywhere to be having mega bro fun

    also invest in a taser you can get cute pink ones

    oh and also go to open mic nights at bars those are the best

    These aren't bars, though. There are actually no bars near us (very small town). Just cramped dorm parties, that's the only real 'social scene'.


    still go at least once and bring a taser :wink:
  • malavika413
    malavika413 Posts: 474 Member
    Hey y'all. I'm just asking a question to the peanut gallery, trying to get a variety of opinions.

    I'm nearly 20 and a college student. I have a lot of friends that like to party on the weekends (dorm parties, since there's no greek life at my school), and they always invite me. I've never gone, but I'm very curious. However, there are a few reasons that I've held back. I've never had a sip of alcohol in my life, so I don't know how I'd react to it. I don't know what to wear. I have a boyfriend that's very against alcohol and partying, and I'd either have to go behind his back or go knowing he'd be worried about me and my safety. Also, most girls go to parties to flirt with guys, which would dismay my boyfriend. I'm not attractive, so no one would hit on me, but still.

    Is it worth going to a college party at least once? My friends really want me to go and experience it, and I am curious. What do you think?

    OK... so what you do is dress casual and invite BF with you. If he decides not to go then you can go with the understanding that he can stop in anytime he likes to make sure you are ok. And that if you feel uncomfortable then you will call him and ask that he pick you up.
    As for Drinking.... I don't think it would be the best idea to start drinking in that situation. If you decide you want to try alcohol do it in your own space with someone who can help you if anything goes wrong. I understand wanting to make BF happy and all but you also must think of yourself. Don't hold yourself back from experiences for someone else's happiness. Go or don't but make the choice for yourself not others. GOOD LUCK

    I'd invite him along, but boys don't typically attend these parties unless they're the hosts or friends of the guys hosting. I go to a school with single-sex dorms, so these parties revolve around "girls allowed, boys stay out". It sucks.

    Seams to me you don't really want to go. If you really wanted to check this atmosphere out you would make sure that everyone would be OK with whatever the situation came to be. You have been given SEVERAL ways of making this a great experience for yourself and you have come up with a reason that it wont work. So i would say don't do anything at all for the rest of your life unless "SOMEONE" gives you their approval. Then later in life you can blame everything on someone else if you end up not happy. I know this is harsh but it is what i see down the road for you if you continue on this path. Step out on your own or sit home and do nothing unless given permission. Best of Luck to you in your choices.

    Wow, that's not very nice. But not everyone in life is nice, I know. What's wrong in seeking approval from those you care about? The fact is, not everyone would be okay with me going to a party. Even if I didn't touch alcohol, the man I love would be very distraught about it. I told him I have plans to go, if he vehemently objects I won't--simple as that. I don't see myself as being 'unhappy' as a result, but rather, I see myself as agreeable and the kind of girl someone would want to commit to long-term.
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    The fact is, not everyone would be okay with me going to a party. Even if I didn't touch alcohol, the man I love would be very distraught about it.

    The what now?!
  • malavika413
    malavika413 Posts: 474 Member
    The fact is, not everyone would be okay with me going to a party. Even if I didn't touch alcohol, the man I love would be very distraught about it.

    The what now?!

    Scratch that--I just spoke to him. He's not happy, but he admits he can't control my life and my decisions.
  • matchbox_girl
    matchbox_girl Posts: 535 Member
    I loved college parties. l met a lot of really cool people and had a lot of very memorable nights.....(and lots of drama, too.) I would suggest you go check out the atmosphere of a college party and then decide if you feel comfortable enough there to drink. Always have your phone on you and always make sure you have a (sober) way home. Take the booze slow--college is a place where you can experience lots of memorable things....so, yes, take advantage :blush:
  • karenhannahmae
    karenhannahmae Posts: 9 Member
    I suggest you try alcohol somewhere safe (like at home or with a small group of friends) first so you won't be pressured into drinking too much or at all at the party. Your boyfriend should learn to trust you and you should be able to talk to him too. Nevertheless, it's your choice if you want to. :)
  • RobynMWilson
    RobynMWilson Posts: 1,540 Member
    I went to one too many college parties, or any parties for that matter, and ended up in AA by age 27 lol. Take it from someone who hasn't had a drink in over 14 yrs and don't miss it...it's not worth derailing your goals and also putting yourself in bad situations. Partying these days isn't like when I was 20 back in the early 90s. Keep your focus and don't waste your time or risk your relationship :)
  • CeleryStick22
    CeleryStick22 Posts: 6 Member
    edited November 2014
    Background: I'm 21 and the legal drinking age here (Australia) is 18.

    I've never been to a party where people were getting drunk, or a club, out of lack of interest mainly. A lot of people don't really understand and insist I have to come clubbing with them and get drunk "at least once", "just to try it out", etc. I've always just laughed and politely declined. I don't really like loud music or crowded parties to begin with and being drunk really doesn't appeal to me at all!

    While I have a glass of wine with dinner sometimes, and I very much like the taste of Baileys, I've never been drunk before. As a post-exam celebration I decided to get a bit tipsy at a friend's place, just me, her and her boyfriend, mainly to satisfy curiosity! I ate first, drank heaps of water and took it slowly and did get a bit tipsy but I don't really think it was as great as people make out XD We went out to a bar for a couple of hours and that was quite fun. I'm glad I chose to do it with a trusted friend at her place and, eventually, a more sedate bar, rather than a club or a party! If you're nervous about the effects of alcohol I would recommend either trying it slowly with a good friend or even jusy by yourself first to get a feel for how it affects you and have an idea of your limits before going into a new situation.

    It's difficult with your boyfriend - in the end, only you can decide your priorities and it depends on a lot of factors, how serious you are, how adamant he is about alcohol, etc! I definitely wouldn't go behind his back - that never works out well and would probably cause an even bigger problem if he found out later that you were doing so - I would have a chat with him about what you want to do and try to find ways to make him more comfortable. If he would be really worried about you, could you reassure him you know about preventing drink spiking, you have plans to get home safely, you won't drink more than a certain amount to start, etc...? Would he go with you if he's that worried? Promise to text him when you're home safe?

    As for clothing - I would do what others here suggest, wear something you feel comfortable and well dressed in. If you were going on a date with your boyfriend to someplace nice, what would you wear? You could always wear a big ring on your ring finger and wave it apologetically at people if they seem too interested...xD If your boyfriend feels jealous, I would say that's really his problem; I would ve insulted if my boyfriend didn't trust me! (Provided I wasn't dressed way more provocatively than usual...which I don't do anyway :P)

    In the end, I would say go to a party if you want to and just take it very slowly, or test alcohol at home first, and work it out with your boyfriend as you feel appropriate. Good luck! :)

  • S0vi
    S0vi Posts: 29 Member
    Always
  • Terraforcejenny
    Terraforcejenny Posts: 47 Member
    It's totally worth it! You don't have to drink if you don't want to (I suggest the "empty beer can" trick if you want to blend in while avoiding beverages, or the solo cup of coke without rum :) ). It's always nice to mingle; if you feel uncomfortable at a particular invite due to shyness, just bring a +1 of a friend you find bubbly/social. If you know the person hosting and don't know anyone else, ask if they know anyone they could introduce you to. Honestly parties helped me make a lot of friends; I was never getting out of hand with it like some people there, but that was totally fine (made me less nervous to chat with everyone!).
    Just gauge your comfort level once you're there; you can always leave a party, but if you never go to begin with, you'll never know if you'll have fun. Some parties were not so fun; that didn't stop the awesome ones from being awesome.
  • emdeesea
    emdeesea Posts: 1,823 Member

    Scratch that--I just spoke to him. He's not happy, but he admits he can't control my life and my decisions.

    Well that's that then. He spoke his mind and he calls all the shots, apparently. He sounds like a controller. I dated one of those, too. He was always "worried" about me.

    http://www.helpguide.org/articles/abuse/domestic-violence-and-abuse.htm
  • Sinistrous
    Sinistrous Posts: 5,589 Member
    If someone else is paying for it.
  • ryanwood935
    ryanwood935 Posts: 245 Member
    edited November 2014
    Partying at the very least is a lot of fun and a great way to meet new friends. You really don't have to drink if you don't want to. If you are going to drink, you should probably have some trusted friends with you, and you may not want to do it around a huge group of people. Everyone reacts differently to alcohol.
    He's not controlling. If I asked to go he'd let me, but he'd just worry. He's always stressed due to his major, family situation and jobs, I wouldn't want to add more stress to his life.
    If you want to go to a party, your can't always let your boyfriend get in the way of that. Him stressing about his major, family situations doesn't get any better down the road. His family isn't going away. Work is always going to be stressful, except now he'll be worrying about promotions, that new job prospect, his jerk boss, etc...

    You never know when you might impress someone outside of class. Might sound crazy, but some of your most unexpected networking can come at parties. Everyone knows someone, and the more people you can meet, the better opportunities you might find for yourself down the road.

    Your self esteem seems to be awfully low. Sounds like the biggest reason for you to love your boyfriend is because he is the first person to be interested in you. That's not something to build a relationship on. Your a pretty girl, and being pre-med you are obviously smart. You will have other options if you branch out. If you want to do fun things, you should be allowed to. If he isn't OK with that, you can find someone who is. There's 3.5 billion other fish in the sea!
  • MonicaA2013
    MonicaA2013 Posts: 753 Member
    Hey y'all. I'm just asking a question to the peanut gallery, trying to get a variety of opinions.

    I'm nearly 20 and a college student. I have a lot of friends that like to party on the weekends (dorm parties, since there's no greek life at my school), and they always invite me. I've never gone, but I'm very curious. However, there are a few reasons that I've held back. I've never had a sip of alcohol in my life, so I don't know how I'd react to it. I don't know what to wear. I have a boyfriend that's very against alcohol and partying, and I'd either have to go behind his back or go knowing he'd be worried about me and my safety. Also, most girls go to parties to flirt with guys, which would dismay my boyfriend. I'm not attractive, so no one would hit on me, but still.

    Is it worth going to a college party at least once? My friends really want me to go and experience it, and I am curious. What do you think?

    OK... so what you do is dress casual and invite BF with you. If he decides not to go then you can go with the understanding that he can stop in anytime he likes to make sure you are ok. And that if you feel uncomfortable then you will call him and ask that he pick you up.
    As for Drinking.... I don't think it would be the best idea to start drinking in that situation. If you decide you want to try alcohol do it in your own space with someone who can help you if anything goes wrong. I understand wanting to make BF happy and all but you also must think of yourself. Don't hold yourself back from experiences for someone else's happiness. Go or don't but make the choice for yourself not others. GOOD LUCK

    I'd invite him along, but boys don't typically attend these parties unless they're the hosts or friends of the guys hosting. I go to a school with single-sex dorms, so these parties revolve around "girls allowed, boys stay out". It sucks.

    Seams to me you don't really want to go. If you really wanted to check this atmosphere out you would make sure that everyone would be OK with whatever the situation came to be. You have been given SEVERAL ways of making this a great experience for yourself and you have come up with a reason that it wont work. So i would say don't do anything at all for the rest of your life unless "SOMEONE" gives you their approval. Then later in life you can blame everything on someone else if you end up not happy. I know this is harsh but it is what i see down the road for you if you continue on this path. Step out on your own or sit home and do nothing unless given permission. Best of Luck to you in your choices.

    Wow, that's not very nice. But not everyone in life is nice, I know. What's wrong in seeking approval from those you care about? The fact is, not everyone would be okay with me going to a party. Even if I didn't touch alcohol, the man I love would be very distraught about it. I told him I have plans to go, if he vehemently objects I won't--simple as that. I don't see myself as being 'unhappy' as a result, but rather, I see myself as agreeable and the kind of girl someone would want to commit to long-term.

    I understand wanting to be loved and accepted and all that, i have a very loving marriage and we make sure that we respect each other. BUT that doesn't mean that i should be a doormat and just do what ever he wants and not do something i think could be a good experience for me just because he might be uncomfortable with it.

    ALSO .... flagging is not meant for something you don't want to hear it is meant for something that is inappropriate for the forums. I was clear that i understood that what i said may be harsh but i was only being honest about what i thought of your situation as you described it. If you don't understand/accept that then that is too bad.

    I wish you the best with your future.
  • Aviva92
    Aviva92 Posts: 2,333 Member
    I think you should go, but I don't think you should drink, mostly because it's illegal before age 21 in the US. I mean, most people ignore this law and drink anyway, but the fact that you're iffy about this whole thing to begin with tells me you shouldn't drink until you're 21.
  • malavika413
    malavika413 Posts: 474 Member
    emdeesea wrote: »

    Scratch that--I just spoke to him. He's not happy, but he admits he can't control my life and my decisions.

    Well that's that then. He spoke his mind and he calls all the shots, apparently. He sounds like a controller. I dated one of those, too. He was always "worried" about me.

    http://www.helpguide.org/articles/abuse/domestic-violence-and-abuse.htm

    He is definitely not a controller. I had a long talk with him and he just wants me to be safe, but he won't monitor my decisions, nor will he berate me for them. I have a trusted friend that he also knows that has offered to take me to a party, and I've accepted. BF and I have a perfectly loving relationship--nowhere close to abuse.
  • malavika413
    malavika413 Posts: 474 Member
    Partying at the very least is a lot of fun and a great way to meet new friends. You really don't have to drink if you don't want to. If you are going to drink, you should probably have some trusted friends with you, and you may not want to do it around a huge group of people. Everyone reacts differently to alcohol.
    He's not controlling. If I asked to go he'd let me, but he'd just worry. He's always stressed due to his major, family situation and jobs, I wouldn't want to add more stress to his life.
    If you want to go to a party, your can't always let your boyfriend get in the way of that. Him stressing about his major, family situations doesn't get any better down the road. His family isn't going away. Work is always going to be stressful, except now he'll be worrying about promotions, that new job prospect, his jerk boss, etc...

    You never know when you might impress someone outside of class. Might sound crazy, but some of your most unexpected networking can come at parties. Everyone knows someone, and the more people you can meet, the better opportunities you might find for yourself down the road.

    Your self esteem seems to be awfully low. Sounds like the biggest reason for you to love your boyfriend is because he is the first person to be interested in you. That's not something to build a relationship on. Your a pretty girl, and being pre-med you are obviously smart. You will have other options if you branch out. If you want to do fun things, you should be allowed to. If he isn't OK with that, you can find someone who is. There's 3.5 billion other fish in the sea!

    I appreciate what you have to say (though I've never considered partying as a networking opportunity, I would think it would have the opposite effect). I do have low self-esteem, but I don't love my boyfriend because he's the first person to be interested in me. I love him because he's kind, smart, considerate, etc. He's just worried about my safety, and he is a bit jealous (but hey, we're all human, I'd be jealous too).
  • paperpudding
    paperpudding Posts: 9,282 Member
    emdeesea wrote: »

    Scratch that--I just spoke to him. He's not happy, but he admits he can't control my life and my decisions.

    Well that's that then. He spoke his mind and he calls all the shots, apparently. He sounds like a controller. I dated one of those, too. He was always "worried" about me.

    http://www.helpguide.org/articles/abuse/domestic-violence-and-abuse.htm

    The BF doesn't have to be happy about it or pretend he is happy about it if he isnt. Perfectly fine for him to say he doesnt like it but he accepts it is her decision.
    I don't see that as abusive or controlling.
  • Miss_1999
    Miss_1999 Posts: 747 Member
    newmeadow wrote: »
    Hi Malavika,

    Using the word party as a verb is usually code for using illicit drugs recreationally and/or misusing prescription drugs for recreational purposes. Drinking alcohol is also included in the verb "party". Why not call the activity exactly what it is? Let's go out and party tonight! or Let's go out and use illicit drugs for recreational purposes and have cocktails and get buzzed too! It's so much lovelier and cleaner and light hearted to say "party".

    So assuming you only mean drinking alcohol, and it isn't against your religion or moral code, the jist of it is you want to try it?

    I'd say drink an alcoholic beverage in the safety of your own home while you're with your boyfriend (who sounds like a catch, by the way) and see how it makes you feel with a person who cares about you and would protect you instead of exploit you. He doesn't have to drink if he doesn't want to and he probably won't condone it. But it's better than imbibing alone or with a bunch of drunken strangers when you don't know how it will make you feel.

    As far as attending parties with drunks, go ahead. I recommend you stay alcohol free though to really be able to see it for what it is. It will be crystal clear and you'll probably be quite bored and opt to leave early. Drinkers and non drinkers mix like oil and water :)

    Congrats on being a lovely, smart, level headed young woman who has never touched a drop of alcohol in her life. Better yet, keep it that way. As the years go by, it will be a point of pride and you'll have bragging rights. Bragging rights you will have earned :)

    ETA: It looks like you've already made up your mind about what you'll be doing. Best of luck to you.

    I'll be honest, this is a new one on me. Maybe it's the area I'm from, or the people I've known, but I can honestly say I've never hosted a party with and/or been to a party with illicit or prescription drugs. I've been partying since I was 16, and yeah, there has been enough alcohol to sink a battleship, cigarettes, and some people have smoked pot here and there. I don't really consider pot to be "illicit". Most people who want to do drugs are flat out blunt about it. They don't say, you wanna go party? They say, you wanna go get high? The people that are doing the "illicit" stuff you're referring to, they aren't doing that *kitten* at parties. That's hardcore. They're baking that and having their OWN kinda party, that NO one wants to go to. It's a whole 'nother level.

    Am I going to say that there aren't parties where people do coke, meth, pop pills and other things? Sure. They probably do. People you work with right now are probably popping pills to get through the day. They might be smoking meth in the car on lunch to function. I don't know. Unfortunately, it happens.

    I own every bit of the partying I did. We were kids and we were wild. I think I was probably drunk most of 1999. Even after I got married, I still partied. Three of my best friends rented a house together, and it was like party central. I think we partied more when we were 26 than we did when we were 21. After I had my daughter, it slowed down, dramatically, obviously. She comes first, always.

    Halloween is the one time of year that I get to go out and have a good time with my friends. One of them usually has a big party at their house, and we all have a blast. Everyone dresses up in costumes, we have food, jello shots, any kind of beer, wine, or liquor we want. We didn't get to have a party this year due to a death in one of our friend's families, but last year was a blast. I'm 36 years old, and still have a good time. I'm realizing that no, it's not a great idea drink myself into oblivion like I did when I was 21. but I still enjoy having a drink, dancing and laughing with my friends.

  • fearlessleader104
    fearlessleader104 Posts: 723 Member
    My parties have pizzas and cookies (considered illicit on MFP) >:)
  • arditarose
    arditarose Posts: 15,573 Member
    My parties have pizzas and cookies (considered illicit on MFP) >:)

    Don't you read the threads with most of us agreeing it's okay to eat cookies and pizza?

    Ice cubes at the movie theater, on the other hand...
  • malavika413
    malavika413 Posts: 474 Member
    Miss_1999 wrote: »
    newmeadow wrote: »
    Hi Malavika,

    Using the word party as a verb is usually code for using illicit drugs recreationally and/or misusing prescription drugs for recreational purposes. Drinking alcohol is also included in the verb "party". Why not call the activity exactly what it is? Let's go out and party tonight! or Let's go out and use illicit drugs for recreational purposes and have cocktails and get buzzed too! It's so much lovelier and cleaner and light hearted to say "party".

    So assuming you only mean drinking alcohol, and it isn't against your religion or moral code, the jist of it is you want to try it?

    I'd say drink an alcoholic beverage in the safety of your own home while you're with your boyfriend (who sounds like a catch, by the way) and see how it makes you feel with a person who cares about you and would protect you instead of exploit you. He doesn't have to drink if he doesn't want to and he probably won't condone it. But it's better than imbibing alone or with a bunch of drunken strangers when you don't know how it will make you feel.

    As far as attending parties with drunks, go ahead. I recommend you stay alcohol free though to really be able to see it for what it is. It will be crystal clear and you'll probably be quite bored and opt to leave early. Drinkers and non drinkers mix like oil and water :)

    Congrats on being a lovely, smart, level headed young woman who has never touched a drop of alcohol in her life. Better yet, keep it that way. As the years go by, it will be a point of pride and you'll have bragging rights. Bragging rights you will have earned :)

    ETA: It looks like you've already made up your mind about what you'll be doing. Best of luck to you.

    I'll be honest, this is a new one on me. Maybe it's the area I'm from, or the people I've known, but I can honestly say I've never hosted a party with and/or been to a party with illicit or prescription drugs. I've been partying since I was 16, and yeah, there has been enough alcohol to sink a battleship, cigarettes, and some people have smoked pot here and there. I don't really consider pot to be "illicit". Most people who want to do drugs are flat out blunt about it. They don't say, you wanna go party? They say, you wanna go get high? The people that are doing the "illicit" stuff you're referring to, they aren't doing that *kitten* at parties. That's hardcore. They're baking that and having their OWN kinda party, that NO one wants to go to. It's a whole 'nother level.

    Am I going to say that there aren't parties where people do coke, meth, pop pills and other things? Sure. They probably do. People you work with right now are probably popping pills to get through the day. They might be smoking meth in the car on lunch to function. I don't know. Unfortunately, it happens.

    I own every bit of the partying I did. We were kids and we were wild. I think I was probably drunk most of 1999. Even after I got married, I still partied. Three of my best friends rented a house together, and it was like party central. I think we partied more when we were 26 than we did when we were 21. After I had my daughter, it slowed down, dramatically, obviously. She comes first, always.

    Halloween is the one time of year that I get to go out and have a good time with my friends. One of them usually has a big party at their house, and we all have a blast. Everyone dresses up in costumes, we have food, jello shots, any kind of beer, wine, or liquor we want. We didn't get to have a party this year due to a death in one of our friend's families, but last year was a blast. I'm 36 years old, and still have a good time. I'm realizing that no, it's not a great idea drink myself into oblivion like I did when I was 21. but I still enjoy having a drink, dancing and laughing with my friends.

    Yeah, I agree with you. None of the parties my friends have described involve illicit drugs. Glad to see that you're still having fun after having a child and getting older. I didn't think people had fun after all that happened--my parents' idea of fun these days is watching a movie on TV every weekend.
  • mb8605
    mb8605 Posts: 4 Member
    edited November 2014
    Some people like to party and some people don't. I'm one of those people who doesn't like to party...I don't drink or smoke...I don't like how stupid alcohol can make people and being an introvert I'd just be chilling wherever the food bowl would be. I'm a musician in my late 20s and the only party I've been to was last halloween where my friends were hosting a day festival (different local bands doing covers of The Muse, Yeah Yeah Yeahs, The Strokes, Dead Kennedys, Queens of the Stone Age). Even then I was very uncomfortable as Halloween is my least favorite holiday but it was still fun because I knew it wouldn't get too out of control thanks to the awesome security at the venue.
  • a4phantom
    a4phantom Posts: 15
    edited November 2014
    Respectfully, Malavika413, there are some flags in your statement that I hope you'll consider.

    First of all, the choice of whether to go party is entirely up to you. Not your friends, not your boyfriend, you.

    Second, going to a party won't require you to drink. It might be boring if you're the only sober person there, at which point you can go home and know you're not missing anything.

    Third, if you go to a party it doesn't mean you have to ever go to another party. If you don't go, that doesn't mean you can't go in the future. You're choosing how to spend an hour, not whom to be for the rest of your life.

    Fourth, the part about being unattractive is OBVIOUSLY NOT TRUE if you're either woman in your profile picture, and is just a lousy (although very common for girls and women) to think of yourself.

    Basically, I'd encourage you to think about this in terms of what you want to do and not what other people want you to do. If your boyfriend will be upset by you making decisions for yourself, well that's a much bigger warning sign right there.
  • malavika413
    malavika413 Posts: 474 Member
    a4phantom wrote: »
    Respectfully, Malavika413, there are some flags in your statement that I hope you'll consider.

    First of all, the choice of whether to go party is entirely up to you. Not your friends, not your boyfriend, you.

    Second, going to a party won't require you to drink. It might be boring if you're the only sober person there, at which point you can go home and know you're not missing anything.

    Third, if you go to a party it doesn't mean you have to ever go to another party. If you don't go, that doesn't mean you can't go in the future. You're choosing how to spend an hour, not whom to be for the rest of your life.

    Fourth, the part about being unattractive is OBVIOUSLY NOT TRUE if you're either woman in your profile picture, and is just a lousy (although very common for girls and women) to think of yourself.

    Basically, I'd encourage you to think about this in terms of what you want to do and not what other people want you to do. If your boyfriend will be upset by you making decisions for yourself, well that's a much bigger warning sign right there.

    Thank you for your kind words. I've decided to go to a party, but most likely I'll avoid alcohol. I've talked to BF about it, and he has agreed.
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