Need to Lose 100 LBS -Robins Thread !

@MKknits‌ --hope your daughter recovers quickly.

@melifornia‌ --your truth resonates with me. I've mentioned this before on this thread (so you long-timers here can skip it if you want), but I read an article about the differences between the way overweight and healthy weight people think. I was at the salon flipping through Self magazine and just happened upon it. I think there were a lot of points in the article, but the only one that stuck with me is that thin people aren't afraid of getting hungry--while people with weight issues are.

This really struck me b/c I grew up with a mother who trained me to fear hunger. If we were going out for the day she would tell us all to eat something first because "you don't want to get hungry later." If I was leaving to go out with friends and hadn't eaten, she would ask, "aren't you afraid you'll get hungry?" If I was going to a party she would say, "eat something so you aren't so hungry when you get there that you eat a bunch of junk" effectively teaching me to be ashamed to eat in front of other people. If reality, she was trying to be a good mom, to keep me fed, to help me not overeat crappy food. However, the reality is that she instilled this fear of not having enough food and this desire to eat when no one was watching.

The timing of happening upon this article was serendipitous b/c it was right when I started here on MFP. It also made me realize that I was afraid of a lot of things thin people didn't fear. I was afraid of sweating or getting red and breathless while exercising. I thought it was just an advertisement to all of the thinner people about how out of shape I was. I was afraid of eating--or at least of eating anything unhealthy--in front of my thin friends, or even strangers. I was afraid of shopping for clothes and would actually pretend to be trying on smaller sizes when I would go with other people.

I decided right then and there to stop being afraid and boy did it change my relationship with food. Now, I own it when I want to eat something decadent--if I want a big piece of cake at a birthday party, I eat it--and then I go run a few miles (or better yet, I run first). Now I'm the girl at parties who people ask, "how do you eat that and not gain weight?" and I say, "I exercise." Now, I love sweating--"sweat is your fat crying" is my favorite quote--and if I don't sweat while working out, I don't really consider it a workout.

Anyways, I think it's great that you've made this realization about your food hoarding and have decided to work on it. I'm living proof that even a lifetime of that kind of thinking can be reversed--you just have to decide to change it.

@susan - Hope you feel better soon. You've had a huge life change and a weekend resting and recharging sounds like a very good idea.

@mnwalkingqueen - Like you, I'm the reason I've been gaining instead of losing lately. It's so hard to keep my focus and motivation going month after month after month. But, I do know that once I string together a few good days, I feel better and have more energy which propels me to continue. The sad fact is I don't think I'll ever have a normal relationship with food. Some days it will win, but if I do most days it should be OK.

@cblue - Love the Rome quote. Losing weight is an every d*** day thing.

@laurie - You were smart to take a couple days off. I need to learn how to do that without backsliding for weeks.

@melifornia and @skinnyjeanz - Thank you for sharing your thoughts on why you have food issues. I realized a few years ago why I do as well. As a kid, I had severe asthma and allergies. So back in the day, I wasn't allowed to eat much of anything. No wheat, eggs, milk, shellfish, chocolate, peanut butte etc. That meant no birthday cake or ice cream. No cookies or candy or even bread. This was enforced strictly by my parents while I lived at home. Then came college and at the same time first generation inhaled steroids (which was the first drug that controlled my asthma) and I found I could eat all those things without having issues. So I did. For the first time in my life I could eat things that I had watched others eat my entire life. Little wonder it's very hard for me to say no to food. Good lesson even for today: Total denial of any food will come back to bite you in the end.

2015 Mantras:

Live like someone left the gate open (Live Joyously)
Persevere

Hope everyone has a good day and weekend!!

Geez! I thought I had checked in yesterday but when I brought up MFP this morning my still unfinished post sat there. I think the auditors are trying to break us, they have been so high maintenance—they should finish up on site today though (fingers crossed).

@ZebsterBC~Welcome to the best kept secret in MFP land, you found a great place for support and encouragement. Check back often to receive the most benefit. I love border collies, Zeb is a cutie!

Welcome to any other newlings that have stopped by lately, post often so we can get to know you.

@MKknits~I’m sorry the flu has hit your family so hard, hope your daughter recovers quickly!

@Melafornia~I can resonate with your Thursday truth. My parents were pretty strict about the foods we ate as kids—my mom didn’t keep sugary cereals around, no sugary drinks, and almost no desserts. My grandmother had told me one time that my dad said to her that he wasn’t raising fat kids, never said it to us though—I think it’s one reason he kept us so active (played tennis with my sister and ran with me). They just really sheltered us from certain things. It didn’t seem to affect my sister much (opposite, in fact—she is uber thin) but I think in some ways it contributed to the food decisions I made as an adult (that, combined with some harmful experiences).

@Laurie~I’m so glad you found your mojo with exercise again!

@nannersp61~I think the hunger you felt yesterday may have come from a high carb breakfast/snacks early in the day, try having more protein in the morning and see if you don’t fare better.

@bapcarrier~I’m sorry for the MRI and upcoming biopsy, keeping you in my thoughts & hoping you receive good news.

@Susan~I’m sorry you’re sick and a little unmotivated. You have been through a lot of changes in the last couple of months, you’ll find a rhythm soon and you’ll be ready to tackle weight loss head on again. I hope that Cyrus is adjusting well.

@Karen~You’re a grading wiz! I had and still have to some extent some of the same fears you did. I still hate eating in front of thin people (weirdly enough, especially my sister—she is super thin), I always feel like they’re judging my choices (while they are usually healthier than their choices). I still prefer to shop by myself or with my mom—I have a fear of going into a store and the salesperson saying something negative (that’s happened to me before). Oy, still lessons to be learned I guess. But I no longer have a fear of exercising or sweating around other people—like you; if I don’t sweat I didn't work out hard enough. I feel so accomplished after a good work out and it really helps me to de-stress from the day.

AFM~Not much to report. I did meet all of my fitness goals this week, today will actually be my first scheduled rest day in over a week—I will catch up on some things around the house, though. Meeting my friend and trainer at the park tomorrow morning after WW for another 3 miles. Need to talk to my friend though and see if she wants to try another park--one of my neighbors has spotted a bobcat in our regular spot and I don't want the dogs to have a run-in with her. Then usual weekend stuff, although I hope to rest a bit more after such a tumultuous week. Hopefully tonight will be a better night for sleep, last night I feel asleep on my back ( a big no, no) and had an episode of sleep paralysis—so scary! I haven’t experienced it in a long time, still hate it when it happens though.

Exercise Goals:

Monday~Walk w friend DONE!
Tuesday~Trainer DONE!
Wednesday~Walk w friend DONE!
Thursday~Trainer DONE!
Friday~Rest Day
Saturday~Walk w friend
Sunday~Trainer

Happy Friday! It’s chilly and rainy today so that might mean some customer coming into the store to hopefully buy and NOT just browse!

Friday fitness: I’m back to working out on the treadmill and elliptical and will do my walking at work today to get as many steps on my Fitbit that I can. The scale is down and my fingers are crossed for a good weight loss this weigh-in.

I have my company dinner that is held every year this Sunday so I’m hoping to be able to something cute and that I feel good.

@Niki, that cobbler sounds delish!! What are the calories in something like that? Do you just use regular oats like Quakers?

@mnwallkingqueen, car troubles suck!! I hope it gets straightened out for you. I have also learned that if I don’t drink my water my weight shows it. Good for you accepting the roller coaster ride.

@melifornia and @skinnyjeanz, thanks for sharing your history with food. I think we all have some story that makes us different from naturally thin people. I think part of my problem was my mom who has always been weight obsessed and on a diet.

Well, I would love to do more personals but the clock is ticking and I got to go to work. My boss is doing my yearly review. Ohhhhhh joy!!

Motto: Fit for 50!

@teresa_3266 - They might be high for many people, but was what I needed to bring my calories up and to keep my BG stable through the night. I also slept the best last night than I have for weeks.

The nutrition counts turned out to be: 158 cals, 36g carbs, 4g protein, 2g fat, 5g fiber, 4g sodium and 16g sugar.

The oats I use are Quaker Old Fashioned. I know it was 2 servings of fruit and 1/2 serving of starchy carb ... but oats are a favorite of mine and I had not had fruit yet. I could have cut everything in half and still been satisfied ... or just eaten half of it, but it was so yummy I gobbled it all up. ...

Bump. Hope i can find this in my phone again!

@geminirl Yup, weekends are hard. Just try to keep your eye on the ball and remember what you are eating. Have some wedding cake, but only a little and try to keep the other things you eat healthy. "life" will always be there, so we all must learn to deal with the occasions like that. Enjoy yourself but try not to eat or drink too much. The important thing is if you get off track to get right back on the next day, next meal and DON'T GIVE UP on yourself.
Welcome to the group.
Barb (mountmary)

Hello there! I've been on and off MFP for the last couple of years but have not been successful, the opposite, in fact. I feel like I've really hit rock bottom and now is the time for me to get myself in order. I have 110lbs to lose. Can't quite believe that over the last 7 years, I've gained that much weight. I'm now ready to get healthy. No more " I'll start tomorrow" for me. Thanks in advance for help and support!

@slimbluehen‌ - You're welcome! I hope it removes that hurdle for you.

@skinnyjeanzbound‌ - You're right, at the root of that is the fear of being hungry. I've only known genuine hunger a couple of times in my life, and then only briefly, but for a lot of my teen years, we were right on the brink. My brothers weren't aware of that because I was the one managing the food budget and making the meals, and I've noticed that they have very different relationships to food than I do. Thanks for that insight; I'm going to write it down as something to talk with my therapist about next time and continue working through.

I'd do more personals, but I'm beat! Did laundry and ran errands this morning, then subbed for middle school PE this afternoon (I was on my feet for 4 hours solid), then had to interview a source right when I got home. Need to go back out and get some groceries for Sissy Night (chili, cornbread, cinnamon rolls), then I can sit down again.

MFP Goals January 18-24

Diet Goals

* No fast food 3/7 days - 1/7
* Track food 7/7 days - 6/7

Exercise Goals

* 30 mins of cardio (preferably elliptical) 3/7 days - 2/7
* Yoga daily as part of Miracle Morning routine - 6/7
* Talk to trainer at rec center about strength training -

Health Goals

* Take meds daily - 5/7
* Refill pill box when needed -

Cleaning Goals

* Declutter kitchen cabinet under sink - DONE
* Declutter kitchen cabinets over sink -
* Take last tote of kids clothes to BigBro's house -
* Follow daily cleaning schedule - 3/7

Personal Goals

* Complete Miracle Morning routine daily - 6/7
* Move wake up time back to 6AM daily - 2/7
* Tweak night time routine to better set up for mornings - getting there...
* In bed, lights out by 10:30 PM at least 4/7 days - x/7 (so close on Monday & Wednesday! lights out by 11PM!)

Work Goals

* Submit at least 4/8 magazine articles for review - 1/8
* File 5/5 newspaper articles - 4/5 (this will end up being 4 b/c the subject of the 5th is unavailable until next week)
* Invoice newspaper - DONE
* Invoice magazines -
* Resolve issue with client's shopping cart -
* Follow up on PR pitches sent last week -
* Coordinate with outlet #1 and PR client for coverage - DONE
* Sub at middle school Friday afternoon - DONE

January All-In

* Login to MFP daily - 23/31
* At/Under calorie limit 20/31 - 4/31
* Workout (besides yoga) 12/31 - 9/31

2015 Mantra: Live Intentionally

I am just getting started . I have about 150 pounds to lose. I am having health problems . I have tried so often to get the weight off .

Hello. Just want you to know you can do it. Just make it a day to day. Your not a failure..success is in you. Stay encourage..my mind set for 2015 is....Close the Gap 2015.

@Niki Go get 'em girl. I am sure it was the tuna!

@kah68 Thank you for the welcome. you'll hear more about the Zebster as he's my regular walking buddy.

@NK1112‌ I'm envious of your access to Concord grapes. They're so delicious if you can find them.

@mnwalkingqueen‌ I'm sorry you're dealing with car problems. They can really add stress to your life.

@susan2396‌ I hope you feel better soon.

@skinnyjeanzbound‌ You did well managing your choices and I like that you've got solid goals that you adhere to. I've been finding goals helpful as well, but I'm not as organized as you. I need to write them down.

My exercise for the weekend will consist of a walk or hike with Zeb. I can't walk at the pace I prefer, but I'll get some hill climbing in. That should finish out my week with all goals met.
I had planned to go to flyball practice to see friends tonight, but I'm just too wiped out from the week. I've been feeling a bit run down these past few days.
I use my phone to access MFP and I'm finding it hard to scroll back and forth to read and reply in the format I see many of you using. I hope to find an easier way to manage it.

@grandmakaye44‌ - Isn't the sunshine a nice break for January? It's supposed to be a stunner here in East Central Kansas today. Trying to find some time in my day to get outside! It's funny that you mentioned food being your love language - I just started reading that book yesterday. I've thought for a while that preparing food for others is part of my love language. I suspect it falls under the "Acts of Service" language, but I haven't read that far yet.

Have a terrific Saturday, everyone!

cblue315 wrote: »

Saturday Sickness instead of Success
I have come down with a horrible cold. Fever, runny nose, sore throat etc.. Taking the day off of work and the gym. Staying home to binge watch the last season of Breaking Bad.

I want to eat. That is how my mother cared for us as children. I know where this comes from. I want all my comfort foods.

Today I did have my food planned and will have to change it up a bit. I am determined to stay within my calorie range. I have everything here to be successful.

Thanks for all your sincere sharing and caring.
Love to all,
Lori
Living life gratified

cblue315 wrote: »

Saturday Sickness instead of Success
I have come down with a horrible cold. Fever, runny nose, sore throat etc.. Taking the day off of work and the gym. Staying home to binge watch the last season of Breaking Bad.

I want to eat. That is how my mother cared for us as children. I know where this comes from. I want all my comfort foods.

Today I did have my food planned and will have to change it up a bit. I am determined to stay within my calorie range. I have everything here to be successful.

Thanks for all your sincere sharing and caring.
Love to all,
Lori
Living life gratified