Tired of explaining my diet to people
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NJGamerChick wrote: »FitFroglet wrote: »KarenFord1988 wrote: »I totally understand and get frustrated with it myself sometimes. I even get laughed at by my friends for not ordering straight off the menu, making modifications, and weighing my food. But you know what? If they keep on prodding and poking, I just say, "Look at you and look at me. Who's doing it right?" That usually shuts them up. I'm also tired of people saying, "Don't get too skinny." That's none of their business, first off, but it makes me feel like saying to them, "Don't get too fat." But that's not "politically correct."
I had a very similar conversation with a friend after a colleague asked "When will you stop losing weight? You're so skinny already!" I asked my friend why that's ok but if I said "When will you stop gaining weight? You're so fat already!" I'd be in front of a disciplinary hearing.
You should have said this to your colleague...
Great for office politics.
If said colleague doesn't see offence to the too skinny comment, it would then be hypocritical to see offence in a hypothetical questioning of it's opposite, no? I'm not saying call her fat and ask when she will stop gaining, but posing such a hypothetical might enlighten one to how such comment is a backhanded compliment.0 -
preciouskitten wrote: »Thats why I do flexible dieting. If it can fit within my macros for the day, then I'm going to enjoy it.
Even if you don't want it??0 -
NJGamerChick wrote: »NJGamerChick wrote: »FitFroglet wrote: »KarenFord1988 wrote: »I totally understand and get frustrated with it myself sometimes. I even get laughed at by my friends for not ordering straight off the menu, making modifications, and weighing my food. But you know what? If they keep on prodding and poking, I just say, "Look at you and look at me. Who's doing it right?" That usually shuts them up. I'm also tired of people saying, "Don't get too skinny." That's none of their business, first off, but it makes me feel like saying to them, "Don't get too fat." But that's not "politically correct."
I had a very similar conversation with a friend after a colleague asked "When will you stop losing weight? You're so skinny already!" I asked my friend why that's ok but if I said "When will you stop gaining weight? You're so fat already!" I'd be in front of a disciplinary hearing.
You should have said this to your colleague...
Great for office politics.
If said colleague doesn't see offence to the too skinny comment, it would then be hypocritical to see offence in a hypothetical questioning of it's opposite, no? I'm not saying call her fat and ask when she will stop gaining, but posing such a hypothetical might enlighten one to how such comment is a backhanded compliment.
LOL. You do that and see where it gets you.
Man, I'm so happy I don't get butt hurt over every comment tossed my way. It must be a stressful world to care so much about stupid things that mean nothing.
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When people offer me food I just tell them I'm Allergic to that. Only once has someone asked me what happens if you eat it. To that one person I said "It will make me Fat".
Please don't say you're allergic to something if you're not. I was poisoned (that's not too strong a word) by someone who thought "one bite wouldn't hurt me" because of adults who are unable to properly express their food preferences.
My next clinic bill is on you.0 -
You guys are all cracking me up, this is awesome. I feel like I should give some color to what sort of precipitated this aggravation. My in-laws are brining over Chinese food tonight and tonight is my cherished cheat meal night and Chinese food is simply not cheat worthy so it's causing family strife that I told them not to bring me any and I will get my own food, which is what opens up the "diet" discussion. My husband is mad at me for being rude, and my in laws are still trying to get me to tell them what I want from the Chinese restaurant.
"Chinese" food is gross. Real Chinese food is good, but that nasty, gelatinous stuff they call Chinese food here is not good. You could just request consume soup. It's just a broth and it looks like you're joining in on the festivities.
... I can see it from both sides. I know you find it annoying, but it is kind of rude to refuse all of it - you may as well not attend (go somewhere else?). They didn't ask you what kind of food you want, they asked you what you want from somewhere specific. They've chosen what is best for them to bring, and you should try to make the best of it. That's life. Request steamed veggies, consume soup, etc. Eat to your typical deficit number and do your "precious cheat" the next day.
That's subjective.
Damn straight.
I've had American Chinese food that was great and certainly not 'gelatinous', and I've had it where it was lousy.
I've had 'real Chinese food' that was great, and I've had it where it was lousy.
My advice to VeryKatie is to quit going to crappy Chinese restaurants. Admittedly, this is hard - the crappy ones vastly outnumber the good ones, at least around here.0 -
When people offer me food I just tell them I'm Allergic to that. Only once has someone asked me what happens if you eat it. To that one person I said "It will make me Fat".
Please please please don't use "I'm allergic" as an excuse when you really arent. This diminishes the severity of actual allergies. People will see you eat XY and Z even though you claim to be allergic to ingredient X and assume that it is safe for someone who truly has an allergy. I can't tell you how many times I have heard "well so and so is allergic but they can eat it" as a reason I should eat something that could kill me. Please don't lie about medical issues.
Hadn't read your response yet when I posted mine. Seriously, it makes me angry. That poster was far too old to pull that nonsense.0 -
You guys are all cracking me up, this is awesome. I feel like I should give some color to what sort of precipitated this aggravation. My in-laws are brining over Chinese food tonight and tonight is my cherished cheat meal night and Chinese food is simply not cheat worthy so it's causing family strife that I told them not to bring me any and I will get my own food, which is what opens up the "diet" discussion. My husband is mad at me for being rude, and my in laws are still trying to get me to tell them what I want from the Chinese restaurant.
"Chinese" food is gross. Real Chinese food is good, but that nasty, gelatinous stuff they call Chinese food here is not good. You could just request consume soup. It's just a broth and it looks like you're joining in on the festivities.
... I can see it from both sides. I know you find it annoying, but it is kind of rude to refuse all of it - you may as well not attend (go somewhere else?). They didn't ask you what kind of food you want, they asked you what you want from somewhere specific. They've chosen what is best for them to bring, and you should try to make the best of it. That's life. Request steamed veggies, consume soup, etc. Eat to your typical deficit number and do your "precious cheat" the next day.
That's subjective.
Damn straight.
I've had American Chinese food that was great and certainly not 'gelatinous', and I've had it where it was lousy.
I've had 'real Chinese food' that was great, and I've had it where it was lousy.
My advice to VeryKatie is to quit going to crappy Chinese restaurants. Admittedly, this is hard - the crappy ones vastly outnumber the good ones, at least around here.
The Chinese food around me is so bad I taught myself how to make it. Mmmmmm....cold sesame noodles.0 -
Food offerings is very much a social thing. like drinking, or joining in a communal meal. it's like saying "what you don't want to be one of us? why not" and the prodding starts.
The drive to have people feel they belong based on this bias is bad. They aren't respecting the person if they aren't accepting of the blanket no thanks.
It is tiring but also understand these people haven't taken the time to respect your own priorities beyond there own.0 -
It drives me nuts that moderation doesn't end well for me and I have to keep explaining that. I've decided to tell people it's not an addiction or a satiety issue or carb cravings or some emotional compulsion or anything else. It's just that I enjoy quietly hating on all you people who can effortlessly have one piece of cake and then walk away satisfied. I am enjoying my bellyful of hatred, okay? So I'm going to be off in this corner with my steak, scowling at all the normal-weight people cruising the dessert bar for sensible portions to fit into their daily allotment. Because I like it!
Jokes aside, with certain things moderation doesn't work for me either. That is the ultimate goal, but I am a work in progress. I figure most people wanting to lose weight didn't always know how to practice moderation. I don't hate though, just envy lol
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NJGamerChick wrote: »NJGamerChick wrote: »FitFroglet wrote: »KarenFord1988 wrote: »I totally understand and get frustrated with it myself sometimes. I even get laughed at by my friends for not ordering straight off the menu, making modifications, and weighing my food. But you know what? If they keep on prodding and poking, I just say, "Look at you and look at me. Who's doing it right?" That usually shuts them up. I'm also tired of people saying, "Don't get too skinny." That's none of their business, first off, but it makes me feel like saying to them, "Don't get too fat." But that's not "politically correct."
I had a very similar conversation with a friend after a colleague asked "When will you stop losing weight? You're so skinny already!" I asked my friend why that's ok but if I said "When will you stop gaining weight? You're so fat already!" I'd be in front of a disciplinary hearing.
You should have said this to your colleague...
Great for office politics.
If said colleague doesn't see offence to the too skinny comment, it would then be hypocritical to see offence in a hypothetical questioning of it's opposite, no? I'm not saying call her fat and ask when she will stop gaining, but posing such a hypothetical might enlighten one to how such comment is a backhanded compliment.
LOL. You do that and see where it gets you.
Man, I'm so happy I don't get butt hurt over every comment tossed my way. It must be a stressful world to care so much about stupid things that mean nothing.
I actually have in many instances posed such questions when I used to work. It was never an issue, but my colleagues were also very, very chill and wouldn't push silly comments on me in the first place. The only time anyone approached me about my eating was when I was only ever seen drinking coffee, which, they were right to do. I've never been much of an eater and still have issues eating before 3pm and in their case, me passing out would have been a liability.
I am the silly hypothetical question person. Even did it when I worked as a cashier in college. The silly questions would make people giggle.0 -
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"Chinese" food is gross. Real Chinese food is good, but that nasty, gelatinous stuff they call Chinese food here is not good.
Thank you for adding that! I get tired of "Chinese food" being synonymous with unhealthy, fatty, greasy, caloric, etc. Like lots of home cooks, I use fresh, good-quality ingredients and I'm conscious of the amount of cooking oil I use, whether I'm cooking Chinese food or other stuff, and my mother was the same way when I was growing up.
And I almost never get grief for my food choices, but I do get raised eyebrows if I'm seen weighing food on the scale. I shrug and move on.
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One of the purposes with eating better, is to eat better. Stuffing oneself with food one doesn't like and has lots of calories too, isn't eating better.
I'm so happy I don't have food pushers in my life (anymore)!0 -
Please don't make false claims that could prove serious to someone who actually has those claims. Things like allergies and intolerances are real and cause lots of harm when not taken seriously, sometimes even death.0
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kommodevaran wrote: »One of the purposes with eating better, is to eat better. Stuffing oneself with food one doesn't like and has lots of calories too, isn't eating better.
I'm so happy I don't have food pushers in my life (anymore)!
So people who can fit Chinese food into their calorie allotment for the day are "stuffing themselves."
I love when people jump to this conclusion. It's so...ivory tower-ish.0 -
paulawatkins1974 wrote: »
No!!!!! Please don't. See post regarding that from before:Please please please don't use "I'm allergic" as an excuse when you really arent. This diminishes the severity of actual allergies. People will see you eat XY and Z even though you claim to be allergic to ingredient X and assume that it is safe for someone who truly has an allergy. I can't tell you how many times I have heard "well so and so is allergic but they can eat it" as a reason I should eat something that could kill me. Please don't lie about medical issues.0 -
paulawatkins1974 wrote: »
This makes total sense. To me, chinese food WOULD be worth it. But I agree if something isn't worth it, no way would I be wasting extra calories on that, just to be polite. No way. "Indulgence meals" are too precious, and rare.You guys are all cracking me up, this is awesome. I feel like I should give some color to what sort of precipitated this aggravation. My in-laws are brining over Chinese food tonight and tonight is my cherished cheat meal night and Chinese food is simply not cheat worthy so it's causing family strife that I told them not to bring me any and I will get my own food, which is what opens up the "diet" discussion. My husband is mad at me for being rude, and my in laws are still trying to get me to tell them what I want from the Chinese restaurant.
And herein lies the problem.
You can fit chinese food into your calories and it wouldn't be an "indulgence meal."
I COULD fit it, and I have. But I find for the amount of food that will fit for my day will leave me hungry later. Plus, I'm still working on moderation. It's something that didn't click as soon as I decided to lose weight.0 -
kommodevaran wrote: »One of the purposes with eating better, is to eat better. Stuffing oneself with food one doesn't like and has lots of calories too, isn't eating better.
I'm so happy I don't have food pushers in my life (anymore)!
So people who can fit Chinese food into their calorie allotment for the day are "stuffing themselves."
I love when people jump to this conclusion. It's so...ivory tower-ish.
I don't think you got my point either. It doesn't feel good to eat food one doesn't like. If you eat food you like, you don't feel like you stuff yourself, but as you indulge. There is a difference there. (My focus wasn't actually on the "stuffing", but on the food choice in regards to personal preference.)
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