Confession Time! ((ABSOLUTELY NO JUDGEMENT))

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  • Italian_Buju
    Italian_Buju Posts: 8,030 Member
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    Tubbs216 wrote: »
    I confess I do not understand the big debate about taking down that stupid flag! It should have been gone 100 years ago, TAKE IT DOWN!
    Let's not go there. The fastest way to get this thread closed it for it to turn into a political debate! :)

    Sorry, I am so far over that I literally posted this meaning I do not understand what the other side even is! Seriously, I do not even know what the other side has to say or why there is another side....I have been talking about this for years and years and am amazed that something is finally happening.....

    I was not trying to start a debate, I do not understand how there even is one......
  • Italian_Buju
    Italian_Buju Posts: 8,030 Member
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    Lois_1989 wrote: »
    FroggyBug wrote: »
    I still need to catch up but I wanted to vent on something.

    No one probably remembers but I have talked about that guy who is on the phone at work all the time and everyone loves him even though he barely works...he just let me know he won some award so he is getting a plaque/prize at 10 today.

    I'm like seriously...

    Poke him in the eye
    Hahahahahahahaa
  • BZAH10
    BZAH10 Posts: 5,709 Member
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    spamarie wrote: »
    misskarne wrote: »
    I know you hate people apologising for asking you questions, @Susieq_1994, but I only do because I feel like that stereotypical ignorant privileged white girl, and I don't want to offend.

    So...there is that - robe, I'm sorry, I don't know the word for it - the long black one with the head and face covering. But it gets to 60C in Oman, right? So, um...how do the women not die of heatstroke?

    That's alright, it doesn't offend me! :)

    It's called an abaya, and most of them don't cover the head or face--They're basically just black dresses. I wear one myself. The headscarf and niqab (face covering) are all separate pieces. There is one that has a head covering attached as well, but these are mostly worn by older ladies, as it's just an older style.

    That said, I wear the abaya and headscarf. I don't find it hot, personally--I actually find it cooler than when I wear "regular" clothing like skirts and blouses because the abaya tends to be very lightweight. It's also because I've been covering for a very long time--If I didn't cover, I'd probably feel hotter due to the sun burning my skin!

    My sister wears a niqab, and according to her, it did feel very hot in the first week, but she says it doesn't feel like that anymore now that she's used to it.

    Just an add-on: The abaya isn't a must, Islamically. Women are encouraged not to wear very bright colors for the purpose of attracting men (yes, men have a rule that involves not attracting women--it isn't a sexist rule), but you're allowed to wear whatever color you like, as long as you're covered properly.

    I prefer the abaya in Saudi Arabia because everyone wears it (I've seen like... two people so far that didn't... Even the non-Muslims wear it!) and I just don't want to stand out. In Oman, I often wear regular colored dresses, skirts, blouses, etc. Unless I'm lazy. Because the abaya is really easy to just throw on and be done. ;)

    Can I ask some follow ups? You say your sister wears a niqab; was that something she decided to do as an adult? And how did she come to that decision? And are you wearing your regular clothes under the abaya? Or is it like a "dress".

    Thanks for educating me! :)

    Yes, she decided to start wearing it two years ago. Nobody else in our family wears it and she's unmarried, so nobody influenced her in that decision--in Islam there are some scholars (I refuse to count the Sheikh Google people...) who believe the niqab is obligatory, and others who believe it is simply recommended based on evidence from the Qur'an and hadith. After doing some studying, my sister chose to go with the scholars who believe it's obligatory, and began covering her face from then on.

    You do have to wear clothing under an abaya--it's basically a cover, but the material is too thin to wear with nothing but underwear underneath, for example. I usually wear jeans and a tank top underneath it--since we have to remain covered, it's best to have your legs covered in case the wind blows it up, for example. :) But I would wear the same under a dress, actually, although I would probably wear cotton pants underneath in that case.

    Oh, can I ask if you have one of these? I've always wondered if it was hard to swim in the modest suits, because of the extra fabric:

    8r71esdpgap0.jpg

    Nope, I don't own one--those suits actually don't meet the fardh (obligatory) requirements for modest clothing for women, especially because they cling when they're wet, and the shape of the body is revealed, which is the major requirement of covering.

    If I'm going to swim, I swim in an all-women's facility with a modest swimsuit (even women aren't supposed to reveal nakedness to other women) or just jump into the ocean fully clothed because that's fun. ;)

    I'm not even totally caught up, but I am SO GLAD you opened up to us here @Susieq_1994 and are giving us all this info, both about your culture and your own personal self. I just gotta let it out: This girl *kitten* rocks!

    Same goes for a lot of our regulars: @MoHousdon @Italian_Buju (BTW we are testing some AWESOME stuff here at my facility regarding diabetes, might be while before human clinical trials though.) @BZAH10 @pofoster21 @quiksylver296 @FrancI27 (I hope that's the right one) Sorry if I forgot some peeps! I love this thread so much. I think I love this thread more than I love guacamole.... and that's REALLY saying something.

    You, I like. I have been known to make a quick and dirty quacamole (diced avocado, halved grape tomatoes, some salt/garlic/lime juice) for breakfast.

    I have never tried guacamole.....or avocado actually....

    I keep trying to will myself to like avocado but I can't. It is gross! Bleurgh.

    Add me to the avocado aversion side. My sister keeps telling me I will like them if I just keep trying but not gonna happen. Why would I waste calories on something I don't even like?

    I tried avocado on my Subway sandwich the one day & imo it tasted like nothing just blah/bland.

    Plain avocado IS bland. Avocado made into guacamole is delish!
  • Italian_Buju
    Italian_Buju Posts: 8,030 Member
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    xMrBunglex wrote: »
    I confess I do not understand the big debate about taking down that stupid flag! It should have been gone 100 years ago, TAKE IT DOWN!

    Agreed. "Southern Pride" my rear end. It's kinda like Germany still flying the red & black swastika. You lost.

    Don't you realize the rest of the country thinks you sound like idiots when you try to defend it?

    Exactly! Thank you!
  • m1xm0d3
    m1xm0d3 Posts: 1,576 Member
    edited June 2015
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    Francl27 wrote: »
    m1xm0d3 wrote: »
    Francl27 wrote: »
    Confession - it's not even 9am on the second day of Summer break and I already want to lock my kids in their rooms.

    Any summer programs you can put them in like vacation bible school or any programs at the YMCA or other local rec centers? Also, check with your county for summer programs. Some are very cheap or free. For sanity's sake, it's worth a shot. lol

    They have 2 camps this year but it's at the end of July and mid August. Didn't want to spend a fortune. We're going in vacations in 10 days anyway. I just wish they would stop bickering.

    Oh I see... well until then, might I suggest something like this? o:) j/k

    cp39ri5fmjo9.jpg + 0qwgb81lygoz.png

  • BZAH10
    BZAH10 Posts: 5,709 Member
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    @MoHousdon
    MoHousdon wrote: »
    Francl27 wrote: »
    MoHousdon wrote: »
    Glinda1971 wrote: »
    MoHousdon wrote: »
    Goodness, what a weekend! This time next week, I could possibly be lying on a beautiful beach in Florida sipping a mimosa. I will be thinking of you all. :smiley:


    Friday night the husband and I went to Outback for dinner. I was not thrilled about this because I didn't think I had enough calories for Outback because I always get the Alice Springs Chicken with fries. I decided to order the chicken, but subbed fries with steamed broccoli, which, if you've being paying attention at all, you'll know how incredibly difficult that decision was. I regretted not getting the fries until I tasted the broccoli, it was delicious. I ended up only eating half my dinner, and I even got to share a piece of cheesecake with my love and STILL managed a deficit. Yay, me!

    Saturday, my daughter and I were going to go shopping for Father's Day, my eye appointment, and get some last minute things for our trip, but we were also going to go to the candy shop for snacks so my husband wanted to come too. We ended up going to the candy shop first which was a big success except they were out of my favorite trail mix (luckily, I still had some left over from the last visit) so I got buttered toffee pecans (holy sweet, salty, and crunchy, they are amazing), and some dried apples. He got mostly candy. :smile:

    From there, we went to the mall since that's where my appointment was to kill some time, but also so I wouldn't be late. We ended up in JCP looking at dresses. Husband picked out some he wanted me to try on (his questionable taste presented itself again) but nothing worked. We met up outside in the sitting area of the mall and he asked me if I wanted to kill some more time at Helzberg, and I said sure. Long story short, we ended up looking at diamond rings and bridal sets. I didn't think we were really going to purchase anything since he said we'd do shopping in Florida. Apparently, he'd been really thinking about that and decided if we were going to get one, he wanted to get it before we went so it could be sized and everything beforehand. I tried on several rings before falling head over heals for a 1/2 ct. princess cut in white gold. It was absolutely mesmerizing. I could not quit staring at it. That's pretty much how I felt the first time I laid eyes on him. Love at first sight. Anywho, I tried on a few different guards and finally found a perfect fit. The lady sized my finger (size 5 btw, I was pretty shocked by that) and I was off to my appointment.

    My appointment took maybe 20 minutes so I went to Auntie Anne's for pretzels and a DP ( I know, I was doing to so good) and then headed back to Helzberg. Well, come to find out, he bought the ring while I was at my appointment and was finishing up paperwork and stuff when I got back. I was shocked, I didn't expect to get anything finished so soon. Turns out, the ring I picked out is a VVS2 (3rd from highest quality you can get) and almost completely colorless. It is also a limited edition diamond which I didn't know either. I just knew I loved the ring. When they were telling us all the stuff about the diamond, they said I have really good taste. I said, putting my arm around Husband, "Obviously!" He blushed. It was adorable. I hope to have my ring by Thursday, but I might have to wait until after we get back from Florida.


    Now for stepdaughter news.

    She was a no call, no show Saturday and Sunday. She DID tag him on facebook saying Happy Father's Day and I love you, but I guess she was just too busy to come by and give him the only thing he really wanted which was some of her time. He fell asleep last night while watching TV and then woke up and asked me what time it was. I said 8 or 9, and he said, really, no way. He then pulled out his phone to check for messages. Nothing. The look on his face was so painfully sad I started crying. I told him I was sorry she didn't come by, and he said, "I can't believe she didn't come over on Father's Day." To make matters worse, Rachael told me she thought it'd be fun having a sister, but it's not. I hate that she's treating them so badly.

    I'm sad because she'll never know how incredible her dad is and that she seems to have zero interest in being a part of our amazing family. If it were up to me, I'd take the car back and tell her off, but I don't want to do anything that could hurt the chances of a future relationship. What I don't understand, is she found him, he didn't seek her out, she came to him. Why would she do that if she didn't want to have anything to do with him, just his money?!

    I'm heartbroken for my loves. Why did this crap have to happen a week before we leave?!

    TL; DR: I AM getting a new ring, I married an incredible man, and his daughter is a selfish little twit.

    Oh man. What a mix of awesomeness and crappiness in this post. I think your new ring sounds pretty amazing, but the fact that your step-daughter is being such a selfish brat is making me so sad for your husband.

    +1

    A mix of yays and hugs for you.

    Thanks!


    MoHousdon wrote: »
    Goodness, what a weekend! This time next week, I could possibly be lying on a beautiful beach in Florida sipping a mimosa. I will be thinking of you all. :smiley:

    TL; DR: I AM getting a new ring, I married an incredible man, and his daughter is a selfish little twit.

    That's awesome news about your ring! Sounds like you had a good weekend except the stepdaughter part. Just curious...why wasn't he involved in her life when she was younger? Counseling may be good for all of you to work through this difficult place. It may reveal some things about her past that provide insight as to why she's acting this way. I hate that Rachael is so disappointed. :( (Hugs)

    He wanted to be, we both did.

    When her mom and my husband broke up, they shared custody (they were never married). For some reason, I'm not 100% clear on this as he doesn't like to talk about it, she quit allowing him visitation. I guess, in the state of Kansas, a mother can say anything she wants against a father, even one paying child support, and it's basically her word against his. She petitioned to increase his child support (this happened several times during our relationship) and was awarded more each time.

    In the almost 15 years we've been married, until recently, I had only seen her twice. Once for her 5th birthday (her mother didn't know about this) and once for Christmas (same year, mother didn't know). When Rach was about 2 maybe a little younger, we found out where she worked and Husband asked if he could see her and she told him she didn't think she (daughter) was ready for that. Because, at the time, we didn't have the money to take her to court, he didn't fight his ex anymore and just did was what right by paying his child support and not fighting it every time she wanted more.

    He would never admit it, but he's a pushover and hates confrontation. Hence the situation we're currently in. Her mom was pretty pissed when she found out she had sought him out. I'm sure she has a lot to do with the way she's been acting recently since she's staying at her house.

    Sorry to be such a downer on a Monday.

    What a horrible woman to deny her child the opportunity of growing up knowing her dad.

    BINGO!

    I'm so sorry you are dealing with this. But it sounds like your step daughter has been under a campaign of parental alienation since she was small. You can google it, it's much more common than people realize but basically it means that one parent deliberately tries to turn the child against the other parent. It takes years. It usually involves lies about what the other parent has done, frivolous law suits and refusal of visitation until the child hates the 'evil' parent.
    Your step daughter sounds conflicted. She obviously wants to know her Dad but who knows what stories she has been fed about him (and you?) Has your husband tried to sit down with her and discuss that he always wanted to see her but her mother prevented it? Alienation is SO psychologically damaging to a child and she may still have no idea who or what to believe.

    I completely agree with this. And 19 is not nearly old enough to figure out such an emotional, engrained issue by herself. She's basically been brainwashed and has no idea how to resolve the conflict because she's not been given the tools. That is NOT to say that @MoHousdon and her husband have not tried. It's a long process.
  • FroggyBug
    FroggyBug Posts: 4,883 Member
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    Anyway like I said it's just a bit of an update and now I'm probably gonna go 'poof' again for a little while but I can't wait to come back and catch up on this thread soon as I do miss it. I've caught up on a months worth of posts before so I'm sure I can do it again haha

    I'm so sorry about your grandma. It is hard to see people you love suffer so I hope she gets better soon.
  • berlynnwall
    berlynnwall Posts: 669 Member
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    Francl27 wrote: »
    m1xm0d3 wrote: »
    Francl27 wrote: »
    Confession - it's not even 9am on the second day of Summer break and I already want to lock my kids in their rooms.

    Any summer programs you can put them in like vacation bible school or any programs at the YMCA or other local rec centers? Also, check with your county for summer programs. Some are very cheap or free. For sanity's sake, it's worth a shot. lol

    They have 2 camps this year but it's at the end of July and mid August. Didn't want to spend a fortune. We're going in vacations in 10 days anyway. I just wish they would stop bickering.

    To keep my kids from bickering so much, I make them a summer schedule - it has built in free time, but mainly has them doing specific things all day like chores, reading, bridge activities, outside play, and I also make them exercise with me. It helps!
  • BZAH10
    BZAH10 Posts: 5,709 Member
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    pofoster21 wrote: »
    LBuehrle8 wrote: »
    Francl27 wrote: »
    Is it me or is it mostly women posting here? Did we scare off most of the men?

    We have xMrBunglex and Uncle Fester sometimes. We ran off the rest with our talk of TOM, bras, breastfeeding and whatever else. :D

    and we have mixmode..I can't remember the correct way to spell it with numbers and such! :#

    Isn't @m1xm0d3 a girl?

    I thought he was the single dad cyclist...? Am I confusing/combining people?

    Yes, he is the single dad cyclist.

    I confess since he rarely talks about 'male things' (I am sure because of us) I think he is male as well. And I am SURE he will be thrilled we ever questioned it. We love you @m1xm0d3! Don't leave us!

    This cracked me up... I will forever think of him as mixmode now!

    I too hope he's not offended and leaves! I know he's busy at work, but I hope he appears again. Also, I "read" letters as numbers sometimes, so "mixmode" is exactly how I read it, also.
  • xMrBunglex
    xMrBunglex Posts: 1,121 Member
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    xMrBunglex wrote: »
    I confess I do not understand the big debate about taking down that stupid flag! It should have been gone 100 years ago, TAKE IT DOWN!

    Agreed. "Southern Pride" my rear end. It's kinda like Germany still flying the red & black swastika. You lost.

    Don't you realize the rest of the country thinks you sound like idiots when you try to defend it?

    Exactly! Thank you!

    Agreed! (And we should definitely get off of this topic quickly.)

  • BZAH10
    BZAH10 Posts: 5,709 Member
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    pofoster21 wrote: »
    Francl27 wrote: »
    Is it me or is it mostly women posting here? Did we scare off most of the men?

    We have xMrBunglex and Uncle Fester sometimes. We ran off the rest with our talk of TOM, bras, breastfeeding and whatever else. :D

    I confess I was actually going to post TODAY that my confession is that I think I run off all the men in this thread. Example:
    -- I asked @tincanonastring if he worked at my company, he asked me if I was stalking him (I deduced where he came from by his posts) and within a week he was gone.
    -- I started engaging with @AgentOrangeJuice on messaging (he expressed sympathy about Oberon, I asked him about his new job, etc.) he disappeared.
    -- @flatasapancake posted a new chest picture, I said impressive! You are slowly working your way around your body, is your *kitten* next and he never came back.

    I have checked on all of them...they are all still posting (not much from @AgentOrangeJuice though so he may truly be busy).

    Like in real life, I scare all the men away. Sigh.

    No, do not blame yourself! It's kind of funny, when you type it out like that, but I highly doubt it has anything to do with you!
  • Italian_Buju
    Italian_Buju Posts: 8,030 Member
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    Ok this might sound a little strange....I am trying to budget my calories for today....and my daughter brought me a caramel and chocolate covered waffle cone thing last night.....

    Now, when looking to log it, is it safe to assume that most, if not all, the waffle cones listed database include ice cream? So, I should be good? I am not eating ice cream, only the cone. It is actually not made to be having with ice cream it is rolled actually.

    **I need to start actually watching what I am eating because sooner or later I am not gonna be able to talk my DR out of weighing me......six months ago she told me she really wanted me to lose 50lbs because I am only a few pounds shy of 400 and take three medications that cause weight gain. I lost about ten, and then my daughter came home and I spent a lot of nights up late talking with her, eating junk and sleeping through my gym time. I gained it back, and am not only down 3-4lbs from my highest weight and I have seen the DR twice since then and have kept her too busy to weigh me, lol. I see her again next Tuesday for a shot of said weight gaining meds,, so she might wanna pop me on the scale, and even if I get out of it this time, it is gonna happen sooner or later......and just to add, I know she is serious because this is the first time she has ever said anything about my weight and I have been seeing her for 20 years....
  • Glinda1971
    Glinda1971 Posts: 2,328 Member
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    @Italian_Buju and @riderfangal - in case you didn't notice you two have exactly the same number of logging days - 240!

    That's super great by the way!
  • Lois_1989
    Lois_1989 Posts: 6,406 Member
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    Tubbs216 wrote: »
    Lois_1989 wrote: »
    Confession: I'm seriously considering the intermittent fasting diet. I'm clearly not getting anywhere with the old fashioned calorie counting and I'm actually getting quite desperate now. I want to book a doctors appointment but I think they will say the same thing as my mum "Why don't you join weight watchers or slimming world" Yea, I don't want to pay someone to watch me stand on a scale.

    I'm also considering taking all the money I have saved for a deposit on a house and getting someone to just suck all the fat out of me.

    It's all feeling very hopeless at the moment
    Sorry you're feeling so down. I do a kind of fluid IF, as I've mentioned here before. I call it 'not eating breakfast'. It usually works out to be a 16:8 fast, because I'm normally finished eating by about 8pm - I'm not a night snacker particularly, especially if I've had a big dinner. Then I'll go til around noon the next day. By then I'm really ready for lunch, but not actually chewing off my own limbs. This is how I figured it would work for me - I always ate a late breakfast because it makes me feel ill to just wake up and eat, so it was just a case of stretching it out a bit.

    I'm not militant about it at all. If we have a family breakfast out or something, of course I'll eat. Or if I know I'm going to have a late lunch, I'll have a slice of toast to keep me going. But this is in general what I do every day, and I find it really helps me keep my calories down. 1500 spread across 2 meals and a snack or two means decent sized meals.

    I did try 5:2 a couple of times, but I was too hungry on the 500 calorie days.

    ETA: Regarding the liposuction - I know you're joking, but I did read about it because my sister had some lipo as part of her recent tummy tuck (which looks amazing, by the way). If you gain any weight back, that fat has to go somewhere other than where it would have gone before you had the fat cells sucked away. Apparently you can end up with really weird fat deposits in strange places because of this. I find that pretty off-putting.

    Oh really? That's nasty. No I've never even looked into it but I just feel that way sometimes.

    Yea the one I'm looking into suggests 600-800 calories I figure if its for two days I can do it and then carry on here at maintenance, or a smidge lower because 2190 calories sounds like too much of a jump up from 1400 calories in my brain. I don't know. I tend to read up about it and research everything before I try something, so I'll see what I find out and figure if it is achievable or not.

    I used to skip breakfast purely because I didn't have the time but then I got a regular job and figured I have time now so I will. I didn't have breakfast today because I swam before work and when I got to work I realised I didn't have anything to eat for breakfast so I just waited until lunch, so it's no big deal if I have breakfast or not.
  • Italian_Buju
    Italian_Buju Posts: 8,030 Member
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    Glinda1971 wrote: »
    @Italian_Buju and @riderfangal - in case you didn't notice you two have exactly the same number of logging days - 240!

    That's super great by the way!

    Yes I saw that! How awesome!
  • nonoelmo
    nonoelmo Posts: 3,941 Member
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    Francl27 wrote: »
    peleroja wrote: »
    All you guys are NOT helping my urge for a puppy lol. DH wanted to wait til next summer, then he said Christmas, now he's saying my birthday (in October).

    I know, I want one so badly too. I was so happy our friends all brought their dogs camping this weekend (there were six in total) so there was always one to play Frisbee with or cuddle by the campfire, but it made me so sad we don't have one yet (our condo board has a no pets bylaw, so we have to wait until we buy a house, hopefully within a year.)

    Do you want a specific breed, or are you going to rescue?

    I would love to rescue but I don't think it's going to be possible for us as there are only a few breeds that don't bother my husband's allergies (poodles and a few poodle crosses, and I'm not a big fan of purebred poodles.) So I think we'll be getting a labradoodle when the time comes, as we know he can live with one of those.

    Well labradoodles are mutts, so it's a total crapshoot and you have a 50% chance to get one that sheds... it's not a recognized breed and there's no real standard unfortunately. Personally, I'd love one (that doesn't shed, obviously), but I'm not paying that much for a mutt.

    Confession - I'm not sure I ever want to deal with a puppy again, no matter how much I love them... they are just too much work!

    I'm in an airport typing on a phone which I don't do well. I grew up with labs and love them. I have a standard poodle. She's small at 49 pounds. She has all the playful goofy qualities of a lab but is much smarter and she does not shed. I would get another standard without a doubt. I wouldn't get a mini or toy period. I love big poodles. I would probably not get another lab for the shedding and drooling factors. For that price I'd go for a poodle. But I also have my shedding drooling pound puppy lovable sweet mutt Bruno.
  • BZAH10
    BZAH10 Posts: 5,709 Member
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    festerw wrote: »
    @BZAH10 the Jeep is an 03 it's starting to show it's age through the Great Lakes winters though, it got a new tailgate/fenders last year and needs a windshield frame this year as well as some rust repair on the tub. That's part of the reason I picked up a 98 Cherokee to drive in the winter so it can take the salt abuse.

    As for Fester, it came from my days in the high school marching band. I was in the drumline where everyone got a nickname and mine just stuck around.

    Lastly for fun I noticed this train wreck on the front page, post 3 it starts going downhill.
    http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10193826/help-out-of-breath-when-excersising/p1

    Thanks for all the info! Also, I'm OBSESSED with marching band drum lines! Both of my sons were drummers in their school marching bands, both play guitar, and my youngest son has multiple drum sets in his basement. I've been to live shows that are JUST drumlines. So cool.
  • Tubbs216
    Tubbs216 Posts: 6,597 Member
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    I confess it really annoys me when an OP will ask a question, get a few answers, accept the answers yet other posters can't help themselves from adding their thoughts on the matter. She ALREADY SAID she now knows that green tea won't help with weight loss. Why keep telling her it won't. She gets it. Seriously - read to the end of the thread before commenting. It's only one flipping page.
  • BZAH10
    BZAH10 Posts: 5,709 Member
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    pofoster21 wrote: »
    BZAH10 wrote: »
    kelly_c_77 wrote: »
    BZAH10 wrote: »
    FroggyBug wrote: »
    BZAH10 wrote: »
    I see Wonder Woman, also, @quiksylver296. Also, I'm a bit dyslexic (which another reason I have a hard time remembering full screen names) and I always call you "Quickysilver" in my head. That "y" seems to trip me up every time!

    Confession: I have to go buy my husband a Father's Day card and gift after work and we're not even on speaking terms right now. This should be fun.

    I hope you guys are doing better now. What is going on? I know a lot of people who are having relationship issues right now.

    For us, the problem is what I've told him for years: we have three people in our relationship - me, him, and his EGO. Tired of dealing with the ego stuff. Didn't expect someone 10 1/2 years older than me to still have ego and maturity issues. But, it's not all him, of course. I've changed in the past 15 years. I don't complain about or talk about my marriage to anyone IRL, so in the spirit of the thread I just decided to take advantage of it and do a little personal whining.

    Thank you for asking. How are YOU? I've been thinking about you and your situation as well.

    I meant to ask...did the card and tequila work?

    Well, it "worked" in that we just started talking again. Normally. As if nothing had happened. Truth is I'm getting tired of discussing the same thing over and over again. Besides, it was Father's Day so I decided to just let it go and make the best of it. Thank you for asking!

    One of the things I have been doing since we all started talking is to try and take a different perspective on people. What are their motivations for their actions, and if I can't change them, can I change something about me that would allow me to have more success in the situation. Its been talking to you all that has helped me realize that... if its worth keeping the relationship, and the other person isn't seeing the problem, is there something I can do differently to end up with a happy compromise? If not...then it's time to move on (I am talking about friends, not a spouse, so the stakes aren't quite as high of course). I am glad you guys are talking... that is a first step. But you have a lot of years to go (hopefully) so I have my fingers crossed you can find a compromise that works for both of you!

    You are very right and I use the same philosophy. We've been together for 15 years, so there's WAY more to it than this, but I won't talk about it here. I just needed to vent that day. I appreciate your thoughtful reply, though.
  • berlynnwall
    berlynnwall Posts: 669 Member
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    BZAH10 wrote: »
    festerw wrote: »
    @BZAH10 the Jeep is an 03 it's starting to show it's age through the Great Lakes winters though, it got a new tailgate/fenders last year and needs a windshield frame this year as well as some rust repair on the tub. That's part of the reason I picked up a 98 Cherokee to drive in the winter so it can take the salt abuse.

    As for Fester, it came from my days in the high school marching band. I was in the drumline where everyone got a nickname and mine just stuck around.

    Lastly for fun I noticed this train wreck on the front page, post 3 it starts going downhill.
    http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10193826/help-out-of-breath-when-excersising/p1

    Thanks for all the info! Also, I'm OBSESSED with marching band drum lines! Both of my sons were drummers in their school marching bands, both play guitar, and my youngest son has multiple drum sets in his basement. I've been to live shows that are JUST drumlines. So cool.

    That reminded me of my confession! The other day I watched the movie Drumline on TV while I was doing laundry. The last time I watched it was when it was new, so it brought back memories. Memories of music from 2002 that I then downloaded. Now I have a bunch of Mystikal songs in my exercise playlist.