MFP gods of mythology
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Timewasticus - god of ingenious threads that you just have to sit and read all the posts, ignoring all else until you get to the latest one
and his brother:
Catgificles - god of cat gif threads because cats and internets.0 -
Aquaticles-goddess of water consumption. She'll tell you wether to use the 8x8 rule or calculate ounces based on weight. Non-worshipers will dry up and die.0
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Airfreshwalkicus - god of fresh air and walking. After eating 1/4 of a chocolate bar will suddenly strike you with an uncontrollable force - you will put on your sneakers and go outside for a brisk walk. This god will "keep on track"...0
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Cardiobunnia- goddess who demands that followers do only cardio machines for exercise. Will strike down follower attempting any form of resistance training in their tracks.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
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Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
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Askholius- repeatedly asks people for advice, only to ignore aforementioned advice completely.0
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Bananum- God of all bananaites and runners, gives the gift of bananas to his followers0
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WonListentous - comes to the forum to ask questions and disagrees with facts until they find someone who grees with them.0
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Texticusonlycus= God of lazy people who only type in txt spch.0
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fiveadayinius - god of the nannied0
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Starvamodicus - will make your body put on weight even in calorie deficit0
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I didn't read all 9 pages so I hope no one has mentioned this lesser - known deity:
Gluteus Minimus - he makes you work your butt off.0 -
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bump0
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Butthurticus - Mischeivous God who encourages his followers to get offended about every slight, imagined or actual.0
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Derpoditus - spreads misinformation as fact and is closely related to Broscienceoditus0
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MedusaThreadie- one venomous topic, keeps splitting off and snaking into multiple threads ---difficult to kill. (Please call mod Perseus.)0
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Gluttonous- God of voracious insatiable eating. Beware of Gluttonous! He is evil.0
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Thighgapidussa - Goddess and keeper of the elusive thigh gap. If you look directly at her thigh gap, you will turn to stone!0
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Nitpictis - The goddess of all those who nitpick on things that just don't matter or are just a figure of speech.
Eg. "Muscle weighs more than fat" - She is the goddess of those who would harp over and over on the wording of that phrase instead acknowledging that they mean, "volume for volume, muscle weighs more than fat" and then refuse to actually help the original poster.
Or
Eg. "I want to loose weight" - She resides over those who will simply bug the poster that you can't "loose" weight but they can "lose" weight who again refuse to give helpful advise.0 -
Farticus - love child of Lord Twinkie, and his mortal enemy, Lady Broccoli.0
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Multifriendicus- God of "friend collectors" Followers of this God will add you for numbers only. Expect no interaction from these disciples!0
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Deleticus-Publicus: the Demi god that insists you announce you are about to delete lame-O's from your FL, so that people on the edge try to win back your favor. Work for it!0
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Nitpictis - The goddess of all those who nitpick on things that just don't matter or are just a figure of speech.
Eg. "Muscle weighs more than fat" - She is the goddess of those who would harp over and over on the wording of that phrase instead acknowledging that they mean, "volume for volume, muscle weighs more than fat" and then refuse to actually help the original poster.
Or
Eg. "I want to loose weight" - She resides over those who will simply bug the poster that you can't "loose" weight but they can "lose" weight who again refuse to give helpful advise.
Don't forget her brother: Pedanticus - The god of ensuring everyone in the universe knows that he knows all things.0 -
supporticus - The god that supports every single MFP idea, no matter how outlandish or ridiculous.0
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Detoxacati. - the god of making money of people's ignorance.0
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Wrappadite- goddess who entwines people with chemical doused bandages claiming waist reduction is entirely possible with this method.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
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bum[0
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saggyandbaggy wrote: »baggitonius - god of clothes that suddenly get too big
Ah! Yes! I worshipped at Baggitonious's alter today in the Treadmilletheon.
I brought pleasing a sacrifice of a shirt that kept slipping off my sholders, pants that needed constant pulling up, a bra that allowed my boobs slip out at the bottom and undies that only stayed on because I kept pulling up my pants.
I believe Baggatonious will soon rain favor down upon me in the form of mannastor giftcardium.
I pray for his continued generosity!
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