I grant then ruin someone's wish...

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  • BigChangeNeeded
    BigChangeNeeded Posts: 671 Member
    Granted. But these things bite!


    two-blue-footed-boobies.jpg


    I wish I could fly.
  • srv524
    srv524 Posts: 1,363 Member
    Granted. But these things bite!


    two-blue-footed-boobies.jpg


    I wish I could fly.

    Yes but then you could also touch the sky.

    I wish I could build a transporter and go anywhere in the world.
  • AshleyC1023
    AshleyC1023 Posts: 272 Member
    Granted, you have the transporter but it isn't always accurate, and not only does it drop you off in random places, but sometimes it drops off different body parts to different locations. It's like a scavenger hunt through the world to find your left foot.

    I wish I didn't have to do anything else all day.
  • srv524
    srv524 Posts: 1,363 Member
    Granted, but then you'd be stuck on here all day...oh wait.

    I wish I were Indiana Jones.
  • jo_madre
    jo_madre Posts: 875 Member
    Granted but you just tripped while attempting to jump a pit of snakes, mosquito's and hot lava.

    I wish I had a dollar.
  • ClubSilencio
    ClubSilencio Posts: 2,983 Member
    Granted. Your can of Miller High Life costs $1.08 with tax though. Only 2 pennies in the take-a-penny plate. Clerk says get your drunk @rse out of his store.

    I wish it were 90 degrees right now.
  • jo_madre
    jo_madre Posts: 875 Member
    Granted. But being folded into that angle is bad for your back so, good luck with that.

    I wish for pretty elbows.
  • jenmar222
    jenmar222 Posts: 9,271 Member
    edited January 2016
    AClark1023 wrote: »
    Granted, you're now married to Juan Mata, but you find out that he's a real *kitten* and womanizer. Not only is he gone all the time, but he's controlling and an ego maniac, who thinks women belong in the kitchen, barefoot and pregnant. The best exchange you can hope for with him is "make me a sammich".
    (God that's cruel, sorry)

    Well I'm having his baby, so that means we've had sex :blush: I'll take it...
    jo_madre wrote: »
    I wish for pretty elbows.

    Granted. You have this tattoo on your elbows now.

    cc80eca50f66cd734c5defefd150e17c.jpg

    I wish I could eat all the peanut butter I want and never get fat
  • ClubSilencio
    ClubSilencio Posts: 2,983 Member
    edited January 2016
    jenmar22 wrote: »

    I wish I could eat all the peanut butter I want and never get fat

    Granted. Seriously.

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    I wish everyone was required to wear, on Fridays, a t-shirt with my avatar imprinted on it.
  • motterotter
    motterotter Posts: 701 Member
    Granted but now you have your grandma and grandpa and every convict and wierdo wearing your torso

    I wish i could magically become Cate Blanchette
  • KendAnne
    KendAnne Posts: 51 Member
    Granted.. you become Cate Blanchette but she hasn't been paying her taxes. You now owe millions in back taxes and have to serve 10 years in prison for evasion and the brightest part of your day is making lipstick and blush from kool-aid powder.

    I wish I could create the next "big thing" and never have to work again.
  • marcelo_templario
    marcelo_templario Posts: 653 Member
    KendAnne wrote: »
    Granted.. you become Cate Blanchette but she hasn't been paying her taxes. You now owe millions in back taxes and have to serve 10 years in prison for evasion and the brightest part of your day is making lipstick and blush from kool-aid powder.

    I wish I could create the next "big thing" and never have to work again.

    Granted...but it is an app that rapists take advantage of.....can you live with that?

    I wish I had residence somewhere outside.
  • christinaemadrid
    christinaemadrid Posts: 5 Member
    Granted but its outside the universe zero gravity

    I wish I could teleport
  • KendAnne
    KendAnne Posts: 51 Member
    Granted

    But....when you rematerialize your molecules got mixed up with things around you. You now have a TV remote where your arm used to be and an excercise ball where your legs used to be.

    I wish it was always summer!!
  • motterotter
    motterotter Posts: 701 Member
    Granted but you are allergic to the sun and burn really badly
    I wish i win the powerball
  • marcelo_templario
    marcelo_templario Posts: 653 Member
    Granted. Now you have a shoal of investors behind you driving you crazy

    I wish I'd be wiser
  • jo_madre
    jo_madre Posts: 875 Member
    Granted. Now you have a shoal of investors behind you driving you crazy

    I wish I'd be wiser

    Granted. Upon attaining your newly found wisdom you immediately realize the pettiness of existing in this world and hurl yourself over Niagara Falls.

    I wish it were snowing right now.
  • mweckler
    mweckler Posts: 623 Member
    Granted but it snows frozen urine,


    I wish my kids would go to bed without fighting me.
  • Gabrielm80
    Gabrielm80 Posts: 1,458 Member
    Gaining 100 lives worth of experience You now know everything there is to know about knowing nothing
    Granted. Now you have a shoal of investors behind you driving you crazy

    I wish I'd be wiser

    I wish healthy food tasted as good as junk food
  • motterotter
    motterotter Posts: 701 Member
    Granted but no one eats it regardless of what it tastes like
    I wish I could swim faster than anyone else ever born
  • Jetamu96
    Jetamu96 Posts: 963 Member
    Granted, but the microchip also affects your appetite making you hungry all the time.

    I wish I could use teletransportation.
  • motterotter
    motterotter Posts: 701 Member
    Granted but now you are an iphone and can only take pictures of food but not eat it
    I wish I had the power of greyskull
  • _Pseudonymous_
    _Pseudonymous_ Posts: 1,671 Member
    edited January 2016
    Granted but then everyone lives forever and we are required to kill off random people in a lottery

    I wish that David Bowie were still here so he can sing me a lullaby
  • Gabrielm80
    Gabrielm80 Posts: 1,458 Member
    He is but you have gone blind and deaf

    I wish turtles could fly
  • motterotter
    motterotter Posts: 701 Member
    Granted but i cant ruin it
    Except Iman finds him in your bedroom and is not amused

    I wish I was my cat and could sleep all day
  • zcb94
    zcb94 Posts: 3,678 Member
    edited January 2016
    Granted, but your owner, tired of losing sleep due to your constant meowing at moonrise, has you put down. RIP :flowerforyou:
    I wish I could be back out in the world, smiling at those who need it, instead of being on bedrest for probably the rest of my life.
  • _Pseudonymous_
    _Pseudonymous_ Posts: 1,671 Member
    Granted but you would be perpetually tired and in pain *sad face*

    I wish that I could have a flying princess unikitty that farted rainbows and puked glitter
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
    Granted. You've been tripping balls for a week straight on the most powerful acid ever synthesized. You've been staring at a wall the entire time and have not showered or visited the bathroom in that entire time. The "unikitty" is actually a matter clump of your own hair ... And the farts are as far from rainbow colored as you can safely imagine. Yes you have puked ... And what you interpret as glitter are actually pieces of your lung. I hope your having fun in Cloud Cuckoo Land ... Because you're not coming back anytime soon.

    I wish I was 21 again.
  • _Pseudonymous_
    _Pseudonymous_ Posts: 1,671 Member
    Granted but you suddenly are struck with erectile dysfunction and adult acne that results in a spiraling depression until you end up being a middle aged man who wears tight sweaters that are too short and has a horde of cats and resembles something along the lines of Zach Galifianakis.

    I wish that I could be a sith lord
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