WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR NOVEMBER 2016

Here we are, almost at the end of 2016; and, going into a "NEW YEAR". Hopefully, all of us can make decisions, right, wrong, or even indifferently that will forge new paths for us for our future. Some of us failed this year, some of us passed (met our goals) this years ... some with 'flying colors'. We've all tried our best to meet the goals we have set for ourselves and encouraged each other along the way. We've been patient when others have needed to 'vent and rant and rave'. We've offered suggestions, we've sometime kept our mouths shut, we've sometime hurt the feelings of others, ... I'd like to think it was never intentional. We've been put in situations where 'sides' were taken, we've had a major election that will change the world as we know it. But, we should NOT be afraid of what lies ahead of us. God is Great and God is within each of us. We've had births, marriages, new jobs (and some have lost them), break-up's, squabbles, and sadly deaths or having (or needing) to start our 'new' lives as caregivers. We've done it before, we can do it again. We've raised our children, other peoples children, some of us have even lost our children in so many ways I don't think I could list every one of them. Sometimes we 'tried' to change our situations and circumstance and it is about the scariest decision that some of us have had to make (usually for our own sanity). Some of us will have to change out attitudes or expectations of others, whether we love them or they love us back. One of the 'hardest' words to say is "NO" ... without feeling like we HAVE to explain it or why. The next hardest thing we do in life, is to 'take a step out in faith' and believing that all things work together for the good and to the glory of our God or Higher Power. [Somewhere in the Bible] Quite often, we don't see the good in something until we are able to look at it as 20/20 hindsight. A lot of the times we can say, "Whew, I am glad that I did not do that and that I was patient enough to live through it. We need to 'forgive' ourselves before we will ever be able to 'forgive' others. We can actually 'forgive' someone, without ever liking them as a person. But, if they are family we've all tried to give them the benefit of a doubt. Some of will have to make a decision about walking away and never turning around or looking back with any regrets.

When you walk in the path that God has chosen for you and you pray for your family, they will also follow you as well - some to the end of the world. However, we also must accept that others might never change and we cannot do that for them ... that is a decision that only 'they' can make.

I've been told that when I say or have a 'negative' thought about someone or something; I need to immediately write down something that is 'good' about that person or thing. Sometimes, the only thing I can write about someone I love is 'she has a good heart' [she is just upset about what she sees as her problems that she thinks nobody understands or are willing to help].

God will not bring you to something, that He is not willing to carry you through it.

This is a site that most of us keep returning to because we are pretty much 'like-minded' women who have goals to be met, lives to see change, and encouragement and gladness or sadness when one or more of our friends here, on other social networking site, family near and far, and so much 'unexpected' that we just don't have any control over.

The Light of God surrounds you
The Love or God enfolds you
The Power of God protects you
The Presence of God watches over you
wherever you are, God is, and
all is well ...

I can think of so many saying and prayers and happy thoughts for each of you; just know that I pray for my 50+ Women every single day. I hope that you will also keep me in yours.

One of my most important goals for 2017, is the read my Daily Bible (a different version from the last two) and hopefully I will learn something new each and every day.

"With God all things are possible" [The Bible - somewhere]

GOD BLESS EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU!

Lenora

My goals for 2017 are:
Read the Bible through with a Daily Bible,
Track my food and my exercise,
Eat better health-wise,
Exercise as many times as I can weekly,
Hopefully lose the rest of my weight to reach my final goal; and,
Love on all those people in my life so that I will not ever have any regrets for the things I do or say.

Hello, Bright Broads!

My week of being three people has passed, thank Heaven, and I have managed to get caught up with my reading! I am still on task for the 24 week Christmas challenge and even after my feast-day, I managed to lose a pound this week... Whoot!

My kitchen is ALMOST back into shape after the weekend feast production - and dinner is in the crockpot... so, all is well in my world.

I won't reply to everyone, today - there simply isn't time and I have a great deal of the stuff that could be set aside to catch up on over the next week or so - but, I will chime in on the whole Tom issue.

Allie, that Tom does not love you is no surprise to me. It has been pretty evident from all that you have said, and not said, about him.

My issue is not the dollar amount of your allowance - if y'all have two homes to support, it is possible that the $20.00 is all there is on a regular basis. My issue is the fact of the allowance, at all. You are not a twelve year old... you are a grown woman in what is SUPPOSED to be partnership between equals. You should be trusted to keep your spending under control and with the full knowledge of how much money there is and where it needs to go every month.

Have you seen the monthly budget? Any facsimile of a budget? Have you seen Tom's paychecks? Information is power... and it seems like you a seriously short on that type of power.

If you don't know that stuff - you need to find out. Mary isn't being outrageous to suggest that Tom might be hiding money. Unfortunately, it is unlikely to be tucked into the pages of books, or under the floorboards. There are a thousand sneaky ways to do it. I heard a story about a person who loaded big wads of money every week onto a home depot gift card... had thousands of dollars on the card that was totally off the grid. Just because you have the information on the bank accounts doesn't mean those are the only accounts he has, either. In this age of paperless accounts - he could have 20 of them - and never have a statement cross the threshold of your house.

On top of that - most companies will allow direct deposits to more than one bank account. I have my check split to our joint savings and checking - but I COULD have it sent to as many as four different accounts. I could have half my check siphoned off to an account my DH doesn't know about, if I were that kind of girl. My "salary" would be direct deposited to the joint account and no one would be the wiser about the rest - unless they looked closely at my paystubs.

My point here is this - if he doesn't love you - and he has gotten to the point of actually admitting it - then you need to know that he has positioned himself... he is ready, or nearly ready, to make any move that he might make.

I suspect that the only reason he hasn't is that you do SOOOO much stuff that he would have to suddenly worry about himself. I mean, who would take care of his Dad? Who would feed the dogs? Who would wash his socks? So long as you meekly go along, he will continue to do his worst number on your soul and reap the benefits of your continued servitude.

Honey - you have spent your WHOLE life taking care of everyone around you - worrying about them, loving them. There is only one person in your life that you have neglected... YOU. If one of your own were in your situation - what would you advise? Would you tell them to stay put, to try and salvage what is unsalvageable? Or would you advise them to start gathering information? To take whatever steps they could to try and protect themselves?

I am with the rest of the gals who are telling you - it's time to take care of yourself -and I am not talking about diet and exercise, here. Put yourself first just for a little while. Call the spousal abuse hotlines - Call the social security offices - call whatever advisors you think might be able to give you good, objective advice - and start making some small steps toward securing something for your future.

I am not saying pack a bag and get out - sometimes that is the worst thing to do - as Tom could say you "abandoned" him, the house, your marriage. I am saying, start researching - is there a family member you could go to? Is there a women's shelter close by? Is your job transferable? Could you work at a different location for the same company? Do you have ANY funds set aside? If you at least have enough to buy a week or two's worth of groceries, you can survive until your next paycheck comes, if you have to leave - or if Tom leaves. Do you even know the NAME of an attorney? You don't have to call him, today, but, certainly knowing who to call would be good. Boy Scouts have the right idea... Be prepared. But, be quietly prepared.

Please, Please, Please - take care of yourself, first, this one time.

And know that we Love you and want you to be OK... We are all just so frustrated on your behalf... we are trying to help - even if it seems that we are all just too full of advice for your comfort.

Huge Hugs for you, Allie...

Hugs for Everybody

Re in TX