The Sober Squad- Alcohol Free Living
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Good morning everyone! Thanks for all your comments and suggestions, they're much appreciated. I'm still trying to figure out where to go from here. I THOUGHT I wanted to live an AF life, but maybe that's not really what I want. Time to do some deep thinking. 🤔
Congrats to all of you that are doing through hard times and remaining on your AF path!
Hope you all have a wonderful day. 😁6 -
I know that it sucks to break a streak of any kind. It must be the way our brains are wired. Currently i have over 500 days logged on MFP and each day, I debate whether I should break that streak just to give my mind a break. It’s pressure.
I had 120 days AF this past July-December 10th. Then, I thought I could moderate and drank a few glasses of wine which turned into a binge for the day and then the most wicked hangover. Since Dec. 10, I have been dabbling in wine here and there.... because once I broke the streak, it has been so difficult for my brain to go back to my rigid way of thinking. While I was AF, I told myself it was non-negotiable that I would not drink. And I kept that streak going and it became easier and easier. I was really satisfied being a non-drinker. Then, BAM, I broke the streak and haven’t gotten it back.
I’m not saying that to depress anyone, just for me, I should have not broke my streak. I was feeling on top of the world. I felt so strong and lost weight. I know that I will get that determination back one day hopefully soon. But I guess what I’m saying to anyone who is debating on trying moderation, think carefully. Weigh the pros and cons. And if you do break your streak, don’t beat yourself up. Make some honest reflections in your journal. Write down how you felt, feel today.... I know that many of us have had many Day 1s. And that is OK! We are human. We are doing the best we can.
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One more reflection... I know that I am not good at moderation. And if I keep dabbling here and there with a drink, I will slide quickly. I know that. I totally agree with you all when you say it’s a slippery slope. I’ve got to do some serious goal setting because that slippery slope is so painful to recover from. Xo Much love to you all. Like I said, we do the best we can. And on any given day, our best is different. That’s paraphrased from the philosophical book “The Four Agreements.”.8
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errydayimmusclin wrote: »Good morning everyone! Thanks for all your comments and suggestions, they're much appreciated. I'm still trying to figure out where to go from here. I THOUGHT I wanted to live an AF life, but maybe that's not really what I want. Time to do some deep thinking. 🤔
Congrats to all of you that are doing through hard times and remaining on your AF path!
Hope you all have a wonderful day. 😁
Some people don't want/need to be alcohol free and that's ok if it works for you,take my hubs for instance,he has 2-4 beers every night,he gets up at 4 goes to the gym,leaves for work at 6:30 and has a productive day,I on the other hand could NEVER stop at 2-4 beers(I drink that in 15 minutes!) I don't stop once I start,I can't so even toying with the idea of drinking is not for me,I hafta push the idea out as soon as it starts or it grows legs and takes over my whole mind and body and I'll give in drink,drink,drink and lay in bed trying to get with it the next day,upset stomach,dry eyes, shakes and most of the time rely on a "hair of the dog" to get going-even on work days so yeah I can't drink and I'm ok with that(most of the time) there's no judgement here at all,we all hafta do what works for ourselves11 -
All these stories about slippery slopes are what is keeping me AF right now even though I had intended to go back to moderation after Dry January. I'm afraid I'd dive back in the deep end after a glass or two of wine. Luckily at this point, I'm not the least bit tempted to have a drink.10
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I am in total agreement with Ruby Red. I am strong if I am on a streak. And I am HAPPY. Depression free, just wonderful. Then I think, "Oh I am doing so well, what can one drink do?" Well for me, one is never ever one. This is what happened to me yesterday. There was some wine in the house (I never have it in the house for this very reason) that someone had brought over, and I opened it up and drank it all. I had told myself I will have one glass...you know the rest. I don't feel hungover but I do feel low grade depression that was not there before, and I am mad at myself. I will never lose weight or meet other personal goals I have for myself I go down that road again. Back to day one.10
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Man, I never realized so many people struggle EXACTLY like I do. Makes you feel not so alone.
@Drummer913 I got a cousin that plays pipes for The Krooked Kilts in Tallahassee. Celtic rock stuff. They stay pretty busy this time of year...
@JenT304 You got this! I'm with you on the "One is never one." Welcome back! Really, every day is Day One. We have to make that same choice every morning... I've just got 11 consecutive Day Ones under my belt at the moment, looking for a whole lot more! March 22, 2020, we will be celebrating your "Year 1". Let's do this!
Day 12 ~ Kicking this thing square in the nards! Been on a pretty good calorie deficit along with it all. Cut off is 1700 a day. Feel like I run out of gas a soon as the workout gets going, but the weight is coming off, I'm sleeping better, and actually waking up on time to go to work...
Thanks to everyone for all the encouragement!10 -
@kevinrfletcher This will be an easy date to remember as it is our anniversary. We are going out with family tonight and I will not be indulging in any wine/spirits. I want to feel happy again like I did when I was 100% AF.6
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@JenT304 HEY HEY!!!! Happy anniversary! Man, what a date to make it stick on!7
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Can't thank each and everyone one of you for your insight , struggles and everyday challenges , although I don't post much, I truly appreciate your honesty . I have read each one, and for me, and again, this applies only to me , its gotten now where I don't crave or even give it a second thought.......there's wine and beer in the fridge, lol, been sitting there for while now, its Lent and its my wifes, but she has absolutely no problem stopping for Lent.........she may drink 4 days a week, and maybe a beer or a glass of wine.....she has absolutely no problem with alcohol
I think that each of us have different stages of addiction........I worked with a lady who said her husband drank a case of beer a day..............whoa, I cant fathom that, but I know her and she is an honest person....He is addicted to alcohol. period...........he CANT stop........hes been in rehab a number of time and he just cant stop.....I think his addiction differs from lots of us.........I stopped for about 15 years, never , never even wanted to have a drink. Then went to a party and had a few.........so for a few more years, I was a moderate drinker. Last April I said enough, I was getting to the point that I was looking forward to 5 o'clock in the evening to have a bottle of wine.................red flag
I am not totally in understanding of people who drink 2 or 3 pints of straight whiskey, I truly have so much compassion for them, I guess they just don't realize the damage they are doing to their body, their brain and sadly, to their loved ones...........man, I had an alcoholic father that really screwed up his life and his family's. I am lost when it comes to addiction........... so unfair
I guess what works for me, and again, this applies only to me, is that I am not going to risk losing my health, my family, and have to deal with the anger, stress , anxiety of getting a buzz for a few hours...........again, best wishes to each of you for being since and honest, it really helps us all..............Lloyd12 -
kevinrfletcher wrote: »Man, I never realized so many people struggle EXACTLY like I do. Makes you feel not so alone.
Really, every day is Day One. We have to make that same choice every morning...
SO TRUE!! It IS always Day One!! Simple but profound. Happy Day 12
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@JenT304 Happy Anniversary!!!!!!!!!3
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@lloydrt Your comment about each of us being at different stages of addiction hit home with me. I never had to drink every drop of wine before I called it a night...BUT I liked to be at a specific level of "buzz" before calling it a night. For me it was the dependence of "taking the edge off" that became my biggest concern and when I'd be sitting on the toilet~LOL~the next morning thinking, "I"m not drinking tonight"...I specifically remembered the first time I did that and the thought that popped into my brain was of my ex (alcoholic) husband and that was the beginning of the end for me...except "the end" didn't come right away...there were lots more promises not to drink followed by talking myself into drinking throughout the day and caving that night...I suppose I just got sick & tired of feeling sick & tired. The buzz just doesn't seem worth all the other stuff...like you said the good things are not worth risking for a temporary buzz...Thanks for the reminder.7
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And now my 2nd vent....as I was driving home this eve, I thought of another Friday eve home alone with my canine pal...since I've stopped drinking, my social life is rather lacking. I suppose I've been hoping for my phone to ring & it hasn't much...hardly at all. LOL I used to initiate a lot more social stuff with friends, but it usually revolved around wine & food. I never realized how much I did initiate stuff until I stopped. It's been a bit of an eye opener. I don't want to think my lack of invites is due to my sober status, but I truly think it is.
So I'm thinking I need to get some new friends...waddya think...?7 -
Wow...a lot of good posts up there 👆👆👆
My wife and I stopped at a bar/grill tonight for some pub grub.
She got a peach margarita...as usual
I had water with lemon to celebrate my 8 weeks AF today.
Temptations are still there. But I know my off switch is broken.11 -
As promised, my Friday evening check in. I'm floored by the change a 'trigger' can make in my thought process.. All day I was just feeling pleased with being back to day 8, sticking with my rigid diet (lost 7 pounds since last Friday). Then the hubs opens a Friday night beer and I start thinking of wine to relax.. Grab a Dasani sparkling though instead.. Fortunately there's no wine in the house or I'd probably talk myself into it. At times when I have these cravings, I start questioning my desire to make this permanent, but I like to think that if I keep fighting the urges long enough they will dissipate. At least I'm AF for now and I'll worry about later, later.. I think part of the struggle tonight is because of the beginning of a pattern of Friday nights for the first 2 weeks of March. Lots of research to do tonight for a big meeting tomorrow to keep me busy.. That is when the little guy finally goes to bed for the night. Hope you all have a nice AF Friday!8
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@lorrainequiche59 I’m bored! I am home again on a Friday night. Just looking at the ipad. Made a pot of tea. Painted my nails. But I must admit I am bored. Same thing here, no more text messages to meet at the local bar. I waved to my friend and her husband who drove by heading for the local hangout. There they are like a permanent fixture. They even have started to be friends and go out with the bartenders. Anyway, I am not jealous of them. Nor do I want a hangover that I would have if I hung out with them. They have that hollow leg- can drink so much and yet go to the gym the next day... anyway.. Lorraine, I can relate. But in the morning, we will feel so happy that we didnt ruin our Saturday with a headache and fatigue.
I look forward to some sun. Tomorrow, I’ll be doing divorce papers most of the day and maybe getting an apartment lease signed. I am in a transition in my life. Just today, I asked myself “What is the meaning of life?” I’ll figure that out another day. But for today, we are sober and peaceful. Xo9 -
@Yellowstone1983 I enjoy the Dasani sparkling water. I like the thin cans.
@Ed_Zilla Hope you ate some good bar food! Yum!
@lloydrt Yes, addiction is a brutal thing. I guess there are stages. Sounds like those who drink pints of whiskey are really bad off. Sorry you had to endure life with a alcoholic parent. I’m happy you have stopped that cycle. Xo
@whitpauly That is the truth! It grows legs and takes over. Yep!!
@errydayimmusclin Yes, it’s something to think about whether to be AF for life. But maybe just break it down into small chunks. Today, I will be Af. And so on...8 -
@RubyRed427 BIG HUGS TO YOU Just checked in before heading to bed...YES, it is 9:20 pm after all...need my beauty rest for packing tomorrow LOL...I have 7 boxes & am going to pack them ALL...it's a start. I sign my lease for my new bachelorette pad next week and get the keys & then slowly will get my new place set up...at least a good start before official move-in day somewhere in April...likely later in the month.
YES, I am always happy when I wake up without the "was-I-just-hit-by-a-truck-last-night" feeling. Even when I don't get the best sleep & feel dragged out the next day, it is a way better day than drinking the night before.
My pup & I are lounging in bed and plan on falling asleep to some Netflix show...Oh the life of a single, sober, older gal !!!! LOL8
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