The Sober Squad- Alcohol Free Living
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For anyone struggling, this is a five minute video by Richard Burton on his compassions for alcoholics It is a very sobering ❤️ poignant speech.
https://youtu.be/cgF1fzCqu-k5 -
Thank you @RubyRed427 and @lorrainequiche59. Yes, being kind to myself means thinking of alcohol as "treating myself" to a big ol' swig of anxiety. Now why would (do) I do that??? I hate anxiety, but wine might as well have a big label on it saying Chateau du Panic or something like that. This little flirtation with it has only reminded me of how bad I feel when I drink.
Lesson learned!! Now on to day 1012 -
@donimfp Chateau du panic LOL3
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@donimfp SO many great observations. "Big ol swig of anxiety." SO true.
I fell off the wagon hard over the 4th (and 5th and 6th etc.....you know how it is. Never just one day for some of us.)
I'm climbing out of the bottle today and will have a day of self care, meditation and prayer, watching inspirational videos and some exercise. It's a new day and I just have to move forward.10 -
Sending you love @JenT304 💙 every single day is a fresh start! 😘3
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It’s so quiet on the thread 🌸hopefully you are having success, but if not , it’s ok to let us know how you’re doing or if you’re struggling. I have heard from people Who say it sometimes takes several brave tries and fails at sobriety, to make it long lasting or a lifestyle change. (Even though nothing is permanent- wolf is always waiting in the woods.)
I was listening to Robin Williams take on alcohol. Obviously, he struggled so much with alcoholism and other things, but he still can bring a laugh about something so serious. You can find his bits on YouTube.4 -
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@donimfp SO many great observations. "Big ol swig of anxiety." SO true.
I fell off the wagon hard over the 4th (and 5th and 6th etc.....you know how it is. Never just one day for some of us.)
I'm climbing out of the bottle today and will have a day of self care, meditation and prayer, watching inspirational videos and some exercise. It's a new day and I just have to move forward.
YUP!!! Tis a new day and you WILL move forward!! You GO girl!!4 -
Jen T304. you look young to have granddaughters. Go you!4
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Hey, everyone! The thread has been quiet, although I still pop in here just about every day. I enjoy reading how everyone is doing on their journeys, which also helps me stay focused on mine.
I'm at exactly 1 year 6 months of AF today! I had been feeling a bit sad lately. I just turned 56 this past Wednesday. Not that I feel bad about being 56. I actually feel great physically and am in the best shape of my life. It's more to do with feelings and issues I've uncovered through journaling and meditation, and that has brought up things that I need to own and accept responsibility for. Having hit a birthday was just a marker for assessing where I'm at. When I stopped drinking in Jan 2018, the first few weeks were pretty tough. The hardest work has come since then, though.
Karen7 -
@kcn2bluesky Happy birthday! My next b day in Sept I will be 56 too.. I am definitely aware that I have more yesterdays than tomorrows at this point in my life and I also have some regrets that I need to accept responsibility for as well. I am so pleased you have stayed away from the bottle for so long. Truly inspirational to me! Thanks for sharing.6
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kcn2bluesky wrote: »Hey, everyone! The thread has been quiet, although I still pop in here just about every day. I enjoy reading how everyone is doing on their journeys, which also helps me stay focused on mine.
I'm at exactly 1 year 6 months of AF today! I had been feeling a bit sad lately. I just turned 56 this past Wednesday. Not that I feel bad about being 56. I actually feel great physically and am in the best shape of my life. It's more to do with feelings and issues I've uncovered through journaling and meditation, and that has brought up things that I need to own and accept responsibility for. Having hit a birthday was just a marker for assessing where I'm at. When I stopped drinking in Jan 2018, the first few weeks were pretty tough. The hardest work has come since then, though.
Karen
Happy 1.5 year Soberversary!!
I have had a similar experience with feelings & issues rising to the surface since I've stopped drinking and I want to thank you for sharing this...I do believe that at some point we WILL heal from this stuff, it's just a slow process and for me, especially lately, I've been really angry and experiencing some depression, but I truly believe this is a stage I must go through. When we stop stuffing our feelings by drinking them down, they are going to need to be dealt with, and like you said it is hard work to face and accept the not so nice bits & pieces. Perhaps this is the time we need to be extra gentle with ourselves especially with our internal dialogue.
I think it is absolutely wonderful that you have succeeded in staying AF for 1 year & 6 months. So, please remember THIS accomplishment because as you well know it isn't an easy go...It IS worth the hard bits though!5 -
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@kcn2bluesky Happy birthday! My next b day in Sept I will be 56 too.. I am definitely aware that I have more yesterdays than tomorrows at this point in my life and I also have some regrets that I need to accept responsibility for as well. I am so pleased you have stayed away from the bottle for so long. Truly inspirational to me! Thanks for sharing.lorrainequiche59 wrote: »
Happy 1.5 year Soberversary!!
I have had a similar experience with feelings & issues rising to the surface since I've stopped drinking and I want to thank you for sharing this...I do believe that at some point we WILL heal from this stuff, it's just a slow process and for me, especially lately, I've been really angry and experiencing some depression, but I truly believe this is a stage I must go through. When we stop stuffing our feelings by drinking them down, they are going to need to be dealt with, and like you said it is hard work to face and accept the not so nice bits & pieces. Perhaps this is the time we need to be extra gentle with ourselves especially with our internal dialogue.
I think it is absolutely wonderful that you have succeeded in staying AF for 1 year & 6 months. So, please remember THIS accomplishment because as you well know it isn't an easy go...It IS worth the hard bits though!
Thank you for your posts, ladies! I really needed these today
Jen, I love the way you phrased how we can become acutely aware of having fewer tomorrows than yesterdays. I regret the many ‘yesterdays’ I squandered. You wrote exactly how I was feeling. I think we can only work to make the tomorrows better.
Lorraine, I love your post! Yes, I think we definitely go through stages of healing because without alcohol, you can’t hide or numb things anymore. And it’s something we just have to work through.
Thank you again to both of you for your words of encouragement!5 -
Hope everyone is well4
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I was cleaing a drawer looking for something the other day. I stumbled on a receipt from February and there was a case of michelob ultra on it. I went back thru my diary to see how many days I crashed and burned and it was 3. Looking back I did lousy so my official start date was March 5th.
I felt disgusted finding that slip. And of course my first thought always turns to the kids. And the guilt swarms in.
What can I do but keep working on a better today and tomorrow.
Happy AF weekend to all.5 -
I was cleaing a drawer looking for something the other day. I stumbled on a receipt from February and there was a case of michelob ultra on it. I went back thru my diary to see how many days I crashed and burned and it was 3. Looking back I did lousy so my official start date was March 5th.
I felt disgusted finding that slip. And of course my first thought always turns to the kids. And the guilt swarms in.
What can I do but keep working on a better today and tomorrow.
Happy AF weekend to all.
One way to view it is that you’ve come so far, they will remember you as you are now- healthy and strong. Forgive yourself because you did the best you could. We go through hard times to learn and grow. Sounds like you’ve come a long way!3 -
RubyRed427 wrote: »I was cleaing a drawer looking for something the other day. I stumbled on a receipt from February and there was a case of michelob ultra on it. I went back thru my diary to see how many days I crashed and burned and it was 3. Looking back I did lousy so my official start date was March 5th.
I felt disgusted finding that slip. And of course my first thought always turns to the kids. And the guilt swarms in.
What can I do but keep working on a better today and tomorrow.
Happy AF weekend to all.
One way to view it is that you’ve come so far, they will remember you as you are now- healthy and strong. Forgive yourself because you did the best you could. We go through hard times to learn and grow. Sounds like you’ve come a long way!
Thanks Ruby for your comment. Its nice to know I can come here for support. Now that I'm not drinking my kids have vented to me that they dont like it when I drink and that gives me a lot of motivation to not want to let them down. Have a great day!2 -
@aroze0928 The purpose of guilt is to signal that we have done something wrong and that we need to correct it. You've done that....That was then, THIS is now. Once guilt has served it's purpose, continuing to punish ourselves with guilt only serves to cause us to feel bad about ourselves....you do not deserve that!
I agree with Ruby that you need to forgive yourself. Easier said than done if we tend to beat ourselves up, but it CAN be done. I think it is fantastic that your kids vented their feelings to you about your past drinking. It shows they respect and trust you enough to share their feelings with you. So you can be PROUD of that!!3
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