The Sober Squad- Alcohol Free Living
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For me, moderation is not an option. It took me years to accept that fact. All the best intentions and plans in the world and before long my attempts to drink "normally" were completely out the window (and down the street, running wildly without pants).
Took me WAY too long to come to terms with the fact that booze is not my friend, it doesn't care about me, and I can live a better life without it.10 -
For me, moderation is not an option. It took me years to accept that fact. All the best intentions and plans in the world and before long my attempts to drink "normally" were completely out the window (and down the street, running wildly without pants).
Took me WAY too long to come to terms with the fact that booze is not my friend, it doesn't care about me, and I can live a better life without it.
Like you, I know moderation is not an option for me. Sure, once in awhile, I can stop at two drinks... or not drink a whole bottle of wine. Some days I don't drink at all. But I am constantly walking on a tightrope; the moment I take my first sip I never know how my night will end up. Every few days, I binge - like a rabid dog. In between the binging days, I may have a more sensible amount. And then I binge...it is exhausting living that way.
I am so tired of thinking about trying to moderate. The moderation train just isn't possible for some of us. It is what it is. I cannot moderate on most occasions, so it's a really easy decision. Just don't take a sip. I also know it will take many years to retrain my brain from being addicted to alcohol. I just am taking one day at a time.
Over the last month of being AF, I am much calmer; anxiety has nearly ceased and I have had plenty of personal stressors and situations to be anxious about. If I were drinking, I am positive my anxiety would be exponentially worse.8 -
Good morning to all. I am not sleeping well, though NOT due to alcohol. Then my insomnia would be compounded by that dreaded racing heart and anxiety. It may just be due to the current world situation we all find ourselves in. I know I am handling this pandemic the very best way I can, and that starts with being completely sober. Of course the thought has occurred to me to 'sand the edges' so to speak, with a couple of glasses of wine. I remind myself immediately that for me, alcohol is not my friend; it is a cunning enemy that needs to be kept at bay. I read so many posts on FB celebrating Cinco de Mayo yesterday, full of photos of friends drinking Margaritas etc. I felt no sense of loss or temptation as I thought I might. There are also posts from people making uneasy jokes like, "Will you come out of quarantine chunky or drunky?" I was about to comment about being sober but I thought it would come across as pious or something so I didn't say anything at all.
I wish you all a happy, healthy day. - Jen7 -
5:56 am in Vegas another 24 ๐ Jen I see those on Facebook too and some do make me laugh but some are irritating like the "mommy needs wine to get thru homeschooling her kid" or whatever, just a sore spot for me cuz that was my attitude when raising my kids, I was so nonchalant about my drinking and didn't realize I had a problem and that I'd barely remember those times later and I was destroying my life at the time as well, just shakin my head at that thought now sheesh! I've tried to handle this lockdown ok but alot of the time I just feel like I'm in a fog, a dream-is this really happening?!? Yes, and as much as I'd LOVE to reopen, I also seen on the news that our US death total is 70,000+ I had hoped they'd be tapering off by now, sorry to be a downer, it's like this is just constantly on my mind and it's stressy for sure, waves to the gang and hoping everyone has a great productive AF day๐บ10
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Today I am starting my journey for sober living, i need this. I hope i can do this.14
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One of my biggest challenges in quitting was sleep. After decades of basically passing out every night, it took months to get back to any kind of normal. I used to think that I was a heavy sleeper. Turns out that really I'm not.
After a sober year I still find sleep to be a challenge. In these days of working from home and sitting indoors all day, it's absolutely vital that I get outside and move for at least an hour, rain or shine. If I don't, I will have crappy sleep.
You've got this! Another hour, another day.7 -
Adding to @nuffer's & @RubyRed427's comments on moderation, if a person has to 'try' to moderate that is an indicator of a problem. People who are able to moderate alcohol do not THINK about what they are doing, they just do it. When people 'try' to moderate their drinking & establish all kinds of rules around their drinking they only are proving that they cannot moderate. They can 'try' but they cannot 'do' cause if they could they would!! They would not need to make rules such as water in between drinks, because tbh moderation is 'a' drink OR two max in an entire evening. If a person is moderate there aren't any drink(s) to have water in between. In my pre-AF days, one or two would be my PRE-drinks before the real drinking began. So glad that is past. No more enslavement to that substance...the freedom from dependence is worth the first difficult bit to get past the cravings to Numbsville!
@LaVeyan you CAN do this!! Keep coming back here for the support
Goodnight ALL....one more day in isolation under the belt and hopefully not too many more.7 -
I tried moderation, but always came back to full tilt. I also just grew plain tired of the mental gymnastics of it all. My sleep improved at first, but now sucks like it did when I passed out almost every night. I've got no issue falling asleep, just staying asleep. Welcome to LaVeyan...you can do this and you're among friends. Knowing that other folks had the same challenge helped me find my own path to sobriety. Don't be afraid to admit you can't do it alone.4
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Welcome @LaVeyan. You will find many good resources on line to help you with this journey. Craig Beck videos on you tube is one place to start. His no nonsense approach resonated with me. We all wish you well and keep coming back here, whether you remain sober or slip. It's a marathon not a sprint.
Happy Friday, Everyone. It feels like every other day these days, doesn't it? Grateful for roof over our heads, grateful I had a socially distant walk with my granddaughters yesterday. My daughter said it was OK for them to hug Granny but they were afraid because of "conovirus". It made me sad. They are only 4 and 2. They do not understand. Nevertheless our governor (in Maryland) has loosened restrictions somewhat so my daughter allowed me to see them and I was happy for that.
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6 am sharp in Vegas another 24,our governor said salons can open Saturday!!! Too soon I think? Too hands on of a business especially since cases are still growing although not as quick, I'm not excited to go back, the owner isn't opening til May 21 anyways so I'll see what's up then, have a fabulous AF day all ๐7
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@JenT304 SO happy to hear you were able to see your grandbabies. I have had some time with my youngest grandson also. My daughter & I believe that they both had this virus a couple of months ago...My grandson was very, very sick for an entire week bedridden with all of the symptoms with a couple of trips to the ER and my daughter had a milder version...nevertheless, I'm in lockdown, he's in lockdown and my occassional trips to the grocery store are uneventful AND there have only been a few cases in our vast area with no new ones recently that I am aware of. So we feel there is very minimal risk seeing each other. At least at 12 yrs old, he is old enough to undersand, but is definitely confusing for the wee ones who don't get it.
@FeelinFooFoo Reminding yourself of the negatives of drinking and the benefits of remaining AF is such a great coping strategy, but if you ever need a boost to keep on if temptations get really strong it may be good to have some extra help on hand such as go-to videos of AF gurus on YouTube or interviews of ones who gave up the drink for a better life cause it may provide the boost you need to stay FREE!!!! You are doing great...one month is a huge milestone!! Congrats!
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In another 21 days I will be AF for 2 entire years...It is mind boggling to think 2 yrs have passed already. I will check out my quit-drinking app on my Sober-versary date and share my stats. I rarely look at the app, it's on my old phone, but when I have remembered to check it out it has given me an extra boost to see my progress health-wise, the # of missed drinks and the $$ I saved (not literally ugh!!...if only...) At least I didn't waste it on wine.
Hope everyone has a good weekend in spite of lockdown or even, in some cases, because of it.8 -
Good morning~ For the last four weeks, I had 3 drinks total. Instead of many bottles. I was getting carried away during early quarantine and buying bottles, putting them in the garage out of distance, making a sheepish walk to the garage to get one... but now when I am grocery shopping, I smugly walk by the wine department and save a lot of money.
Today, my son is having virtual graduation from college, so I am going to the Ex's house for lunch. I moved into my new house. My life is starting to be more manageable for me. Next step, I must lose weight. I have gained 20 pounds in a year due to many life changes and bottles of wine. Wishing the gyms would open!! It snowed again and it's May
@whitpauly I'm happy you can get back to work; I guess you'll be wearing a mask and saving on lipstick.
@lorrainequiche59 Congrats on 2 years!! So proud and impressed. Way to go!
@FeelinFooFoo Yes, I do keep seeing the UK has lots of cases. Yes, you CAN do two years.
Once, the lockdown ends, I want to search for an AA meeting near my new house and become a regular. Wishing you all a great day!
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@whitpauly I saw one salon on the news that has reopened with lots of changes. No blowdrying which makes sense but I'm sure distresses the customer but it will be worth the sacrifice to get my roots done eventually!
@lorrainequiche59 Bravo on 2 years!! That is amazing! So glad to be with you on your journey. @FeelinFooFoo My daughter lives by herself in London and I am worried sick and wondering when we will ever see her again. She seems OK as she is a bit of an introvert so doesn't seem to mind the alone time.
Hang in there everyone. This too shall pass.4 -
I'll probably still put lipstick on @RubyRed427 ๐ Lorraine, that's great you're nearly two years sober! Make sure you share your stats so we can celebrate with you ๐ @FeelinFooFoo I have some friends in the UK and they've mentioned that some of the restrictions are being lifted? Maybe it just depends where you're at? It's like that here in the US,, my daughter that lives in Portland says they'll not be making much progress until September!! She was eager to get back to work but she's an event coordinator at a event center so no weddings, graduations, or anything else can be held anytime soon so that's that, such a sad the in life and I'm scared this soft opening might be taken away if cases of c-vid rise, grrrrr 6:40 am in Vegas another 24,have a wonderful AF day all ๐5
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@FeelinFooFoo. We went to Scotland last October. Edinburgh, then up to Inverness. It is breathtakingly beautiful. Our daughter is in Islington in London. I hope you get some relief and some more restrictions lifted soon. You are doing amazingly well with your sobriety under these crazy conditions.5
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Happy Mother's day to the mom's๐ ugh @FeelinFooFoo you put into words what I was thinking when this virus kicked off cuz it seems like everytime I'd have a drink session I'd get some kind of cold after anyways so no way did I wanna get the'rona! Also alot of emotional stuff, the night I heard we were closing down I felt so empty, got up the next morning and got ready for my last day, was in such a fog and stopped at a gas station to buy beer on my way to work, drank one once I got there and continued for 4 days!! I'm just glad it was only the 4 and not a quarantine long day drunk fest, jeez! 6:34 am in Vegas another 24, hope everyone enjoys their day AF!4
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Happy Mother's day to all the moms!
I lost my mom in 1994. Every year since, I'd raise a glass to her memory on this day -- she did love her wine. Still will hoist a glass for this evening, but this time it's fizzy water.
When the isolation and working from home started, I thought for sure I'd be at risk for getting back into the bourbon with boredom and stress. It's actually a lot easier than I thought it'd be.9 -
6:32 am in Vegas another 24 ๐8
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