The Sober Squad- Alcohol Free Living

SunnyDays930

@heatheramoure Welcome to our kind and supportive group. We are glad you are here!

Sunshinelinzee

SweatsOnSunday wrote: »

JenT304 wrote: »

Hopefully as more and more people go AF (and it seems to be a trend) we will not have to justify not drinking anymore than justifying not smoking. My standard answer lately has been to make a sort of puzzled face and say, "I used to like it a lot but I somehow lost my taste for it. I don't know why or how." Who is going to argue with that? Or Ill say, "it gives me an immediate hot flash and you don't want to see that" This is especially effective with men. They won't ask me twice. lol

I am 100% using this hot flash line at work parties. I should also mention that I work for a professional sports team (don’t get excited - not a big one, minor league) and while we have a few women it’s pretty much 85-90% men so this will solve all of those conversations if they ever come up hahaha.

So day 9.... I’m not feeling so great today. I wouldn’t say I’m craving or questioning my resolve but I just feel strange. I’ve noticed I’m having really vivid strange dreams....can’t say I dream when I drink. My sleep has been not great and I woke up today actually feeling hungover and anxious but without the drinking. I don’t know... Maybe my mind is starting to work through all the stress from the past few years (I went through a lot of major change) and I’m starting to deal with myself? I guess to me dealing with myself is more terrifying than never drinking again. I have to do it though, it’s part of the journey.

I have a networking lunch to go to today. I don’t know if there will be alcohol...sometimes there is and sometimes there isn’t. I think it’s a pretty easy decline since I’ve got to go back to the office and continue my big protect which financially focused...can’t do math after drinking, plain and simple.

SunnyDays930

@Sunshinelinzee Hang in there. Vivid dreams are normal. Also I didn't really have a good nights sleep until day 12. It will come. The poison is slowly working it's way out of your body.

RubyRed427

DCRunnerGirl78 wrote: »

Hi all, giving this another try. The last three months have been ROUGH, and my drinking is getting the better of me. I won't go into details, but if anyone has any thoughts, prayers, or good vibes to spare for my family and our situation, it would be much appreciated. Making today Day 1...hopefully for the last time. Reading your posts makes me think there's still hope. Just have to get through the next month or so.

Nice to see you! There’s always hope.

DCRunnerGirl78

Good morning, new friends! Today is the third morning in a row of waking up without a hangover in ages. I didn't sleep amazingly last night, but I do feel better than I normally would. I was even able to get up for my 3am workout again (I work in a bakery, 6am start time with a 1 hour commute). This will be the first morning of work without a drink (or 6) the night before in weeks. Looking forward to an easier day!

Sunshinelinzee

Good Morning!
Still dreaming bizzare things In hi def but at least it sounds like that’s normal hahaha. The luncheon yesterday was fine - no alcohol served and even had my favorite unsweet tea on the menu 🤪. I ate the lunch but did my best to portion, stay on plan and count too. Still going strong - today puts me in double digits starting day 10! I’m officially tired, cranky and not giving up.

I actually also just figured out what AE is - I honestly had never heard of it and had no idea what people were talking about. Anyway signed up for that too.

RubyRed427

Although Ive been sleeping poorly due to a nagging cough, I agree with you that it is so nice to wake up without a hangover.

I have been cleaning like a demon in our basement, box by box, throwing tons away and donating things. Streamlining all my belongings for the apartment. I could not have been so efficient these last few weeks if I had been drinking. The productivity skyrockets when you're sober. I’m so grateful for this thread. Xo

SunnyDays930

Yesterday I noticed an open bottle of chardonnay with about 2 glasses full of wine left in it, left over from Mother's Day. I had such a powerful urge..it came out of nowhere. Luckily my husband was home and I called him into the kitchen to kill it off and he happily obliged. "Taking one for the team" as he so thoughtfully put it. Anyway I made a seltzer for myself. I thought that would have been OK to have that in there (I am fine with unopened wine around) but apparently I am not over it yet. Anyway, I'm staying the course. One damn day at a time!

whitpauly

Hello all,Jen dumb thoughts hit me like that too! My daughter is moving into a rental house that needs some fixing up and yesterday when we went to look at it my first thought was"cool drunk painting!" I guess cuz I always painted houses drunk in the past and couldt help but put them together,sorry phones acting weird! More later have a great AF day all!

lagoscarrie

I'm sure I've said this before, but I've become a fan of the alcohol removed, FRE wine and similar brands. There is trace alcohol (probably about the same as kombucha) so maybe some folks don't even want that, but I cannot detect it.

I have been AF for almost five months (minus one slip!) and have no desire to drink again. But I do miss some of the alcohol rituals -- toasting in a champagne flute, drinking a glass of red wine late at night with my husband after the guests have gone -- stuff like that. If I can have AF wine, I feel totally fine. I don't feel deprived or as if I am being cheated out of anything. It really has made this whole thing a lot easier for me.

Sharing this in case it helps anyone else! I'm not on the board much anymore because I don't have any more weight to lose -- and that is all thanks to cutting out wine. My life is better in every possible way. Best wishes to you all!

VeggieGirlforLife

You are doing so great @FeelinFooFoo! It's very cool to see you learning the same things I did and how it's changing your perspective on drinking. Stay the course!

I also loved the ritual and I've been able to have that while being AF. I've switched to flavored sparkling water, but I pour it in a wine glass and sip on it while making dinner or sitting down to watch a movie. I didn't think I'd even like sparkling water because I am not a fan of carbonation, that's why I just sip on it. It's more about that feeling of relaxation and amazingly, I get that with flavored water now and have zero hangovers and zero calories!

Sunshinelinzee

Good Morning All!

It's a good day - the sun is finally shining here and it's incredible what that is doing for my mood. I signed on to start the alcohol experiment - man that Annie Grace just speaks volumes to me. That whole 2 bottles of wine and waking up at 3 am - yeah, so that's me. I've only just started with the videos but so far I'm really identifying with it. I'm starting to notice some things now that my head is clearer. First is realizing how much I was actually drinking - much like I don't always see how my weight has skyrocketed in my minds eye (you know, until I see myself in a photograph) - I didn't really see the quantity of how much I was drinking until I stepped back from it. Like I knew it was a lot - but now I'm like holy poop. Also calories - so I've gone full fitbit and am really measuring and counting and logging correctly and realizing I was absolutely incorrectly calculating/estimating my calories in vs calories out - and THEN ADDING ALCOHOL ON TOP so basically extra sugar and calories by the 1000s - no wonder I was feeling stuck, not losing and continuing a waistline expansion. I'm finally noticing in general I'm starting to feel a lot less bloated and my facial redness is half of what it was 2 weeks ago so I'm wearing a LOT less makeup. Also as I'm reading along posts from others I'm noticing how many women are stuck in a wine trap and am feeling so relieved that I'm not the only one.

So that's where I am today - I hope everyone is doing extra well!

AF Day 11
AE Day 1

whitpauly

Hope everyone has a fabulous AF Friday!

lorrainequiche59

@DCRunnerGirl78 & @FeelinFooFoo Thanks for the reminder of the benefit of working without being dragged out & cranked up trying to work after "one" too many the eve before...THAT is a huge benefit for me especially because of the physical nature of my job...I can remember having to totally push myself to move & keep on moving...my employers certainly didn't get the best of me when I was feeling like crap dreaming of crawling in the nearest corner to rest!!

lorrainequiche59

@RubyRed427 Isn't that the truth about motivation getting murdered with alcohol. @WhitPauly when you speak of "drunk painting" I was thinking that I may have started the paint job, but if I had more than one, it would have been game over for the paint job.

@JenT304 Interesting how our "alcohol brain" sneaks up on us when we least expect it!! It's like we are going along just fine and then BLAM!! out of nowhere we get hit with the "crave wave"...but like @FeelinFooFoo shared, once we realize what is happening it is so much easier to combat it and once we change the dialogue in our head from wanting a drink to NOT wanting the consequences of that drink, then the wave dissipates until the next one LOL

I also can absolutely relate to the "did I ever really enjoy drinking?" as in the taste. It's like @FeelinFooFoo shared from Annie, it is more like the lead up to the drink...the anticipation and all that she said, even when the thought would first hit, that I'm stopping on the way home at the LCBO and then the lead up to the first drink which signals the effect of that first drink...YET, I will admit it wasn't only the buzz for me because I only liked dry wines...I'd poor a sweet wine down the sink rather than drink it just to catch a buzz. After all I did have my standards LOL, but lots of times I didn't immediately love every dry wine either, but was chasing the buzz and so I'd force the first glass or two down & eventually it started tasting pretty good LOL . So pathetic really!! But that is the nature of addiction isn't it!!

lorrainequiche59

I'm making up for lost time on here, I had to catch up reading and everyone is doing so well...it is definitely inspiring for me and I really miss my friends here when I can't spend much time keeping connected. SO, I have today off and that is why I'm blah, blah, blahing after reading everyone's stuff (is blahing even a word? It is now!!) LOL

I've been dog sitting for a week now & have been staying at my daughter's for the past 3 nights. I'm thinking they are in the sky on the way back home now. She did post a few pics during their vacation on FB so I was glad for that, they had an awesome trip. Hard to believe it's already been a week.

The one last blurb I wanted to share was when I was watching "The Book Club" with Diane Keaton, Jane Fonda etc last eve and noticing how prominent alcohol was in almost every scene in that movie. I'm not sure why it hit me in that particular movie cause it is likely the same ol' in many movies...anyway, I just remember thinking WOW!! And it was older women drinking wine....mostly, in one scene they had a bottle of Smirnoff's. One of the common lines was, "I need a drink!!" If that isn't conditioning, I'm not sure what else to call it. So glad I'm not being conditioned any longer.

Happy AF Friday!!!

SunnyDays930

I love everyone's comments and observations. Had a wonderful AF time with my daughter in from London. She goes back today but I am so grateful I was fully present for her visit. Happy Weekend to all!

donimfp

@FeelinFooFoo, you are doing so well and it’s fun to read your reflections as you are on this new adventure.

Being AF has made my job in juvie SO much easier that I’ve been tempted to rescind my resignation and sign up for one more year. May 31 is my last day and I truly love the kids. This morning on my drive to work out of the blue I said a prayer for a girl who left the program in mid-April ( Our students come and go according to their sentencing; I only have 2 students now who were there when I started this school year). Anyway, this afternoon our registrar told me this girl tried to commit suicide yesterday. Apparently she’ll make it but just barely. I only share that because I’m thinking about the importance of this job and my mixed feelings about leaving. My husband is convinced it’s time, though and I’m almost positive he’s right.

I went ahead and sprang for Annie Grace’s Intensive course. It’s pricey but less than hubby and I were spending on alcohol per month. Tomorrow is Day 50 and I have a lot of fear that this is my threshold. It was last time and the work emotions have me feeling very vulnerable.

Xo to all and enjoy the weekend!!

lorrainequiche59

This is a long one, but please be patient with me cause I'm a little bugged and need some feedback!!

OK so I need some feedback to calm my puzzled and kind of frieked out mind. I am at a client dog sitting. I'm here for 4 days then I kennel her for 4 and return home...YAY...then get her for 4 more days. I've worked for these people for 10+ years and have sat with their dog a few times and feel trusted & valued etc. THIS is my little friek out. When I arrived here yesterday aft, I was getting myself organized. Even though they tell me to help myself to whatever, I bring my own food anyway and put that all away. Had a bit to eat and talked to a friend for a few mins and as I was sitting on the couch talking to her, I looked up at the entertainment unit and on the top shelf was a camera staring right at me...I tried to not react and look as if I was shocked to see it, I just tried to act normal like I was only looking in that direction and continue to talk with my friend. Then I went over to the island in the kitchen (it's all open concept so the camera captures most of the living area) and opened my laptop and began working on it and then looked directly at the camera, went into an adjoining room through several other rooms off camera & entered the living area at the other end where the camera was, got on a stool and disconnected it!!!!!!!!!

I looked online & found the camera and it was advertised as a doggy/nanny cam and am hoping they purchased it to watch the dog when they are out. It can be connected to their phone so they can have live coverage of whatever is going on in their home. Unsure why they would feel the need to do that though when they live in a remote area on a huge chunk of land and their closest neighbor is NOT close so it wouldn't be a matter of concern for the dog causing some kind of disturbance for them. It is a grown dog who is fine on her own AND the they don't work everyday...he can work from home and she has a very part-time, once-in-awhile job. So they are here most of the time with her. SO of course, I begin to search the other rooms to see if I'm being monitored and so far not!!

I had a gut reaction to this that brought back some old stuff when I lived beside a psycho for several years...In fact, that is the reason I've moved twice in 3 years. I loved my space then, and did not want to move but it was my sanity or my lovely view and location...I chose sanity. One of the creepiest events living beside the nut job was his monitoring my activities on my deck by means of a camera for who knows how long. I always wondered how they knew what I was doing in my space because there was a privacy wall between our outdoor areas & they would make comments about what I was doing (having a glass of wine, reading my Bible...just normal stuff) & I just figured someone in a building across from me must have been friends with them & would tell them this & that...THEN one day as I looked up above their door going out to their deck, there was a camera looking at me in my space...It was the creepiest feeling because not only would it be able to pick up activity out on my patio, but would have been able to see into part of my living area because my patio door was glass. Anyway, that was the beginning of the end of me living there....

Anyway, I cannot think of any other explanation than that the camera is here to spy on me!!! If they got it for that reason, they now know that I know and obviously disconnected it. I thought I'd wait for them to say something to me, but decided IF they put it there to spy on me...they will likely not say anything!! And I was thinking of not saying anything, but wait to see if they do. ANYWAY, I'm likely way overthinking this, but I feel violated. SO. I'm thinking of addressing the elephant in the room and directly asking them why they have a camera, and telling them how creepy that is for me. I know I had confided in the female when I was being tormented by my psycho neighbor and I also know I told her about him watching me....

I just need some objective feedback from anyone who may help me to address this in a way that isn't a reaction to other stuff...Even now that I've disconnected it, I wonder is there some other type of monitoring such as a hidden something that can hear me...?? IF I decide to address this at all, I will wait until they are back rather than text her or anything of that nature...but this REALLY bothers me!!!!! Cause my gut is telling me something that I don't want to hear!!

FEEDBACK PLEASE!!!

lorrainequiche59

@FeelinFooFoo thanks. Yes, I definitely need to address this for MY peace of mind. As far as the security end of things, these people leave their doors unlocked at all times even when they are out of the country or gone for other extended times. In fact, they gave me the only key awhile back because I do NOT like leaving the doors unlocked when I leave & they have never asked for it back. So, I'm thinking security isn't a huge concern for them.