The Sober Squad- Alcohol Free Living
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Good Morn
I've been reading Gabor Mate's book on addiction and read an interesting point that I'd like to share here. It is in relation to dopamine's (the feel-good chemical in our brains) role in addiction, any addiction, food, sex, alcohol but in this section he highlights drug use. "Environmental cues associated with drug use ~ paraphernalia, people, places, and situations ~ are all powerful triggers for repeated use and for relapse, because they themselves trigger dopamine release. People trying to quit smoking, for example, are advised to avoid poker if they are used to having a cigarette while playing cards. Unless they move to a different area of town or to a recovery home, my Downtown Eastside patients find it virtually impossible to stop drug use, even when they form a strong intention to do so. Not only are drugs readily available, but everything and everyone in the environment reminds them of their habit."
Then further on in the chapter he writes, "Dopamine activity also accounts for a curious fact reported by many drug addicts: that obtaining and preparing the substance gives them a rush, quite apart from the pharmaceutical effects that follow drug injection. "When I drew up the syringe, wrap the tie, and clean my arm, it's like I'm already feeling a hit." Celia, the pregnant woman described in Chapter Six, once told me. Many addicts confess that they're as afraid of giving up the activities around drug use as they are of giving up the drugs themselves."
This applied to my use of alcohol...driving home from work and taking a detour to the wine shop made me feel almost giddy, (this was in spite of my post-morning resolve not to drink that day lol) going in & selecting my bottle (s), having a laugh with a familiar cashiers about it being my 2nd home, anticipating pouring my wine when I arrived home, impatient to get there...then picking out my glass, uncorking the wine and the first pour and first sip...Ahhhhhhh!!! My temporary relief was on it's way, BUT the entire lead-up to the drink gave me a rush of anticipation....like my relief is coming....phew!! I am certain that everyone in this space can relate to this.
For ME, avoiding people, places & situations that involve drinking is vital in my continued work on my sobriety. Although difficult initially to stop associating with my drinking buddies to drink and trying to carve out a different relationship with them while sipping fizzy water or tea, I soon learned who my true friends are and who my drinking buddies were...I cannot get complacent if I want to remain AF. Not that I am never around alcohol or I never am around the people I used to drink with, but I am rarely in those scenarios...My lifestyle is different now....not drinking is my lifestyle, so I am no longer attracted to that scene, but it has been hard won and will be a continual work in progress but the benefits of being AF are now my dopamine hit. 8 -
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@lorrainequiche59 I Can totally relate to the part about the building up to the drink. The feel of the cork being pulled out of the bottle. Smelling the wine. Pouring it in a pretty glass. I get that completely. Someone on The Alcohol Experiment said they enjoy tart cherry juice in their wine glass now. I just bought some. It is supposed to be very good for you but it was almost as expensive as a cheap bottle of wine. Oh well. I am saving a lot more than money right now so I feel more than OK to indulge.5
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I'm also enjoying the ritual of coming home from work to a nice drink of grapefruit juice, tonic, Perrier, and lime. My husband has it ready for me. He used to have a vodka and Perrier ready and the drinking began. But the ritual itself is nice. I'm trying to find other satisfying non-alcoholic drinks. I ordered the High Rhodes from Kin Euphorics but am not a fan. I like bitter things, but it was way too bitter for me--I felt like I was drinking sandalwood, even when I mixed it with tonic or juice. The search continues. I've ordered from Curious Elixirs so am anxious to see if one of the 4 flavors is a winner.
Anyway, I take the point that the ritual around the drink is as satisfying, or almost, as the drink itself.8 -
I drank 5 NA beers last night. When I was drinking, I would never drink beer unless it was the last thing available. So I thought, was I looking for the buzz? I am not sure. Anyway I won't do that again. I don't want it to lead me to a real one. Plus even though they are only 70 calories apiece that's still 350 empty calories. I don't need that. I DID try the cherry juice and it is delicious but almost as many calories per glass as wine unless I cut it with seltzer, which I will start doing. I'm going to an antique store today to look for a pretty glass that is just for me and my NA fancy drinks.5
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Today I am celebrating!!
I am celebrating by feeling well, feeling like getting up and exercising, by feeling like being kind to my body.
The longer I go, the less I even think about it. However, I have zero patience for drunkenness. Others drinking does not bother me, but drunkenness really gets under my skin.
Maybe in the next six months I will learn more patience.
Congratulations!!5 -
antiderivative wrote: »
Today I am celebrating!!
I am celebrating by feeling well, feeling like getting up and exercising, by feeling like being kind to my body.
The longer I go, the less I even think about it. However, I have zero patience for drunkenness. Others drinking does not bother me, but drunkenness really gets under my skin.
Maybe in the next six months I will learn more patience.
It's my sixth month, too!!! Yay, us! I was just tired of the headaches in the morning for only a few minutes of pleasure. It had diminishing returns all around. I am just done, and it feels great. I've only just started logging my food and exercising about 2 weeks ago, and I've lost 8 lbs so far. I give sobriety a bit of credit.
And congratulations to you too! Outstanding work ladies, everyone sounds really good,hope we all have a great AF day,6:37 am in Vegas another 24 💖6 -
I drank 5 NA beers last night. When I was drinking, I would never drink beer unless it was the last thing available. So I thought, was I looking for the buzz? I am not sure. Anyway I won't do that again. I don't want it to lead me to a real one. Plus even though they are only 70 calories apiece that's still 350 empty calories. I don't need that. I DID try the cherry juice and it is delicious but almost as many calories per glass as wine unless I cut it with seltzer, which I will start doing. I'm going to an antique store today to look for a pretty glass that is just for me and my NA fancy drinks.
Almost afraid to ask what kind? Used to love my beer.1 -
Congrats everyone on the milestones! Just came back from vaca and the thought crossed my mind more than once. Seems like it would go hand in hand palm trees sunny weather..I didn't.
I know my kids are proud of me. Even tho they dont say anything. Id be a real jerk to blow that. Thanks to you all for all your insight wont lie it keeps me going coming back here and reading it all.
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Forgot to add Im on the year and a half mark!9
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@aroze0928 Heineken NA. Some of the NA kinds have a trace of alcohol but this one has zero. It does make you feel fun but 5? That's too many calories. It just made me see how impulsively I was drinking. I couldn't have been that thirsty!4
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@aroze0928 Heineken NA. Some of the NA kinds have a trace of alcohol but this one has zero. It does make you feel fun but 5? That's too many calories. It just made me see how impulsively I was drinking. I couldn't have been that thirsty!
I went through the NA Beer phase for awhile after quitting and I found the Heineken the best of the bunch you can buy just about everywhere. To Jen's point though, just not worth the calories. I've been a MPF Member since 2013 and counting the calories in booze was kind of a revelation. Some days I would log 1500 calories of hooch. Since quitting, I really haven't replaced the empty calories but I'll go through 4 or 5 seltzers or Diet Ginger Ales most nights, and no, I'm not that thirsty. Just habit I suppose. Later this month, it'll be 18 months for me and 40 lbs lighter. Another gift of sobriety.8 -
Thanks Jen it would be nice to try them.
@no44s4me congrats on the 18 mos and 40 lbs! Same here with the nighttime selzers. Today I actually bought grapefruit selzer and splashed it with diet grapefruit juice. Needed a change. Its definitely a habit. Im not that thirsty either.3 -
Just popping in to say happy weekend/Labor Day. Day 62 for me today.
Monday I'm going to my daughter's home 4 hours away. She is having a fairly minor heart surgery (oxymoron?) on Tuesday morning, and I'm staying with my 2 granddaughters until Thursday or Friday. There are many reasons around this to rejoice that I'm alcohol free. First, I normally make an excuse to stay in a hotel (hello, wine time for me). This time, of course I can't stay in a hotel because she will be in the hospital and I need to be with the girls while her husband's at work. However, this time, that makes me happy. I will be with them more. I am not afraid that I won't sleep because of not drinking since I now am quite used to sleeping without drinking. I will wake up each morning ready to care for and play with the girls. I will feel good all day instead of nursing a hangover from the night before's drinking in a hotel room. I will save the cost of four or five nights in a hotel. The whole trip will start in a good way because I won't be hungover on my Monday-morning drive after drinking the night before. Good Grief!!! Just writing this makes me realize what a number alcohol does (did!) on my life. Ewww. Good riddance! What did I ever see in you?7 -
September 25th marks a year from me. Sobriety not only changed my life but it really has allowed me to change others lives too. I read a book by Craig Beck called alcohol lied to me and literally in the snap of my fingers never wanted to deal with it again.9
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@donimfp Hoping all goes well with your daughters heart surgery and that you have a fun time with your grandgirls and get lots of cuddles. I'm glad that you are enjoying your AFness and will reap the benefits during your time away with your Fam.
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September 25th marks a year from me. Sobriety not only changed my life but it really has allowed me to change others lives too. I read a book by Craig Beck called alcohol lied to me and literally in the snap of my fingers never wanted to deal with it again.
YAY!! Congrats ~ that is a HUGE milestone, your first year sober!!! WooHoo!!! Craig Beck is awesome. Learning from him got me through my first phase of sobriety. I watched his YouTube videos multiple times a day for the first 6 months and then regularly for the next 6 and gradually was able to pare down to an as-needed basis. Education is power and Craig has a way of cutting through the crap and telling us like it is...love his direct approach. Thank you for sharing your success with us. 3 -
@arose0928 & @no44s4me Congrats on the 1.5 year mark...WooHoo!! Inspiring!!4
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Good morning friends! We have a rainy day here for Labor Day but that's ok; I plan on staying home. Tomorrow will be the first day with students. I am excited~ I'm not scared anymore about getting Covid. I can control only what I can control.
I heard a great analogy about alcoholics. The speaker (Father Martin - youtube) said an alcoholic keeps getting into the boxing ring. They get bloodied and bruised, but during the next round , they go in again and again.
@khall1984 Congrats on one year! What a blessing! I listen to Craig Beck on YouTube. He's good!
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One day at a time....3
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RubyRed427 wrote: »
I like that thinking. Thanks for sharing! 💐4 -
It almost happed today... the stress was almost too much. I had a rocks glass and measured Kaluah for a White Russian. My husband said “you know you don’t want to do that” and I ran out of the room crying.
I’m still sober
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@RubyRed427 Happy first day back tomorrow. Thank you for the Wayne Dyer video. I love his encouragement to think small. It's way more doable thinking in those terms with any addiction.4
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This is almost going to sound humorous. Remember when I wrote a few days ago, I am not scared of Covid anymore? Well, here I lay in bed with a fever, sore throat, headache and cough. I am waiting for the results of the covid test. But I do feel better than yesterday.
@lorrainequiche59 Thanks for your message!4 -
RubyRed427 wrote: »This is almost going to sound humorous. Remember when I wrote a few days ago, I am not scared of Covid anymore? Well, here I lay in bed with a fever, sore throat, headache and cough. I am waiting for the results of the covid test. But I do feel better than yesterday.
@lorrainequiche59 Thanks for your message!
Irony at its finest! Hope you start feeling better soon!!!2
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