The Sober Squad- Alcohol Free Living
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@FeelinFooFoo, I'm so glad you had a good, restful holiday. I truly wish you the very best in your quest for moderation. Kate Bee, Annie Grace, and others I've read (Allen Carr, Jason Vale) claim that going from a heavy drinker to a long-term moderate drinker just doesn't happen. Maybe you will be the exception that proves the rule. I hope so (Or maybe you didn't drink that heavily--I may be mis-remembering some of your earlier posts). In any event. please keep us posted. I hope in 6 months you can report that you've found that happy middle way that seems to elude many of us (definitely me!). But no need to leave this group! I hope you can enjoy both threads.4
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Welcome back @Feelinfoofoo...glad you had a relaxing vacay!
@Donimfp I'm excited for you!!!!!
@MaGaOhMa Congrats and thank you for sharing your success in your healthier lifestyle.
I watched a YouTube video the other day entitled, "What's Alcoholism Like?" It's a young guy in his later 20s who shares his story describing himself as a high-functioning alcoholic. He said nothing significant happened to get him sober. I could relate cause I remember my brother asking me if something had happened to cause me to quit...to which I replied, "Nope, just the increasing dependence" This guy in the video talked about how people always talk about hitting bottom & shared what a really low point in his life was but that was not when he got sober. He said, "I just got tired...felt like I was coming out of the other end of a storm...I couldn't keep living the way I was living...it does not have to get to a certain point for you to get sober...things don't have to get worse before they get better."
He actually described my life when I was drinking...my pattern of starting & stopping and then starting & stopping again, trying to gain control of something I have no control over, isolating so I could drink. He said he had all these people telling him he didn't have a problem and I did too cause I hid it well. And not only that, I didn't have to always hide it. I just made sure I gathered "friends" aka "drinking buddies" who would reassure me I didn't have a problem...kinda like the blind leading the blind. LOL It's worth a watch for anyone struggling. Just knowing we are not alone in our struggle is a tremendous resource.
Happy healthy week to all
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Thanks, @lorrainequiche59. I will check out that video. What you relate of its content resonates with me, too. No big crisis caused me to (finally) quit, either. Today (given that it's now 2 a.m. where I am so it's "tomorrow") is Day 80 for me, and I have no intention of ever having another Day 1. I'm up at 2 because I have a fear/concern (won't go into the details) that we may be facing prostate cancer. Thus the difficulty sleeping. Worries are keeping me up. BUT, I'm sober. And I'm aware that if we do have something looming, I'll be able to be a support in a way I would not be able to if I were in the midst of my love/hate battle with alcohol. No surprise that I got up and turned to this site while I try to kind of lull myself back to sleep. There's always a feeling of supportiveness here.5
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Good morning~ I'm back at work. And on the way home, I thought for one second I should stop and get wine, because that's habitual thinking. But I didn't. Since I have been AF and ill, I have lost 8 pounds easily. Just eating good food, no fast food, and no alcohol calories has just made the weight fall off. For me, drinking is like walking a tight rope, sometimes I stay on the rope, but when I do fall it is so painfully obvious, I should just be AF. It is too painful for me to have those binges because when they happen, I suffer terrible emotionally and physically.
Also, the poor food choices and feeding my hangover sure don't help the weight. I just figure some people's bodies are just not meant to drink and that's me. I focus on sobriety more for my organs and emotional health (anxiety comes with drinking for me). It's almost a relief not to have to drink or negotiate with myself.
If you can moderate, I applaud you. I really really wish I could. I would love to have some wine, sit back under the stars and enjoy.... it is so romantic for me to wish I could drink normally. But I cant.
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@donimfp I really hope for you there is no cancer diagnosis in your family. I'm sorry. It's terrible to have to worry about that.
@FeelinFooFoo Sounds like your trip was a success!! I am happy for you; yes, give moderate drinking a try. Maybe it will click for you. I want it to. At least, you are much farther in your knowledge than you were even a year ago. So much awareness and education about alcohol has probably helped your goals. We are always here for you on this thread- whether your moderate or abstain.
@MaGaOhMa Welcome! Sounds like you got into a nice AF rhythm of life. As much as I enjoy a lovely glass of wine (or ten), it just isn't in the cards for me. 20 pounds would be a dream for me. Happy you are in a good place.5 -
201 days AF!
I missed 200 yesterday - oops. I am in the Florida panhandle where hurricane Sally hit, so my mind has been elsewhere. We came thru with only minimal damage. Neighbors one street over we’re not so lucky. More clean up today. At least if you stay busy you don’t think about drinking!!
201 days of peace of mind- at least you never have to worry "who did I call?" "did I text anyone". ... Not sure if that ever happened to you but it sure did with me.
I'm happy you had minimal hurricane damage- what a worry~4 -
@lorrainequiche59 so nice to read your wise words! Always good to see your posts.
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@RubyRed427, so glad you're back in the game. This time of total AF for 80 days, I've actually lost 21.4 lbs. so far. I'm the same way. The combination of no alcohol, no drinking food, and LOTS of water seems to be the magic bullet for me.6
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I passed the 500 day mark and didn't even notice. It does get easier.
For the former beer drinkers, I've found a source for Lagunitas brewing Hop seltzer. It's not NA beer -- there's no malt, just a zero calorie hop-flavored water with a touch of yeast. I used to homebrew and hang out with a bunch of hopheads. I miss my IPA style beers, and this is an excellent substitute. In California they have a version combined with cannabis extract that is quite good. Not available in Washington but it's fairly simple to do DIY addition of extract. Highly recommended.
516 days, I never would have guessed it'd be possible.6 -
@FeelinFooFoo First, I love your new picture. I love dolphins!!
Second, I felt similar, I woke and was just happy that I didn't feel sick. It's day 21 for me. I keep saying I want to do at least 30 in a row, but then I remind myself.. How about just take it one day at a time.
I have to say since I had Covid, I still don't have must of taste and smell so there is less temptation to drink or even eat anything bad for me.
So many Saturdays wasted in bed feeling like death, so let's celebrate today with a nice Perrier.
Last night, I made a Shirley Temple for myself. Remember those?5 -
@FeelinFooFoo I know you are much younger than me so you probably dont remember Shirley Temple. I was also thinking about your little brother and wondering how he is doing with his drinking.0
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I passed the 500 day mark and didn't even notice. It does get easier.
For the former beer drinkers, I've found a source for Lagunitas brewing Hop seltzer. It's not NA beer -- there's no malt, just a zero calorie hop-flavored water with a touch of yeast. I used to homebrew and hang out with a bunch of hopheads. I miss my IPA style beers, and this is an excellent substitute. In California they have a version combined with cannabis extract that is quite good. Not available in Washington but it's fairly simple to do DIY addition of extract. Highly recommended.
516 days, I never would have guessed it'd be possible.
I keep hearing it gets easier, I sure hope so!!! And soon!
Congrats on 500
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@RubyRed427, so glad you're back in the game. This time of total AF for 80 days, I've actually lost 21.4 lbs. so far. I'm the same way. The combination of no alcohol, no drinking food, and LOTS of water seems to be the magic bullet for me.
That's significant weight loss~ awesome! I agree with your water comment. I cannot get enough water and keep on chugging it. I think that does help with weight loss.2 -
One last thing, I read that Dax Shepard relapsed. That made me so sad. But he is sober now and admitted it. I also remember how much lying and deceiving you have to do when you hide your addiction. So much work!1
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I got an email last night saying I am now on to the next (and I think last) stage of the Jeopardy audition. So fun! I really don't think there's a chance that I'll ever make it to the show, but I'm enjoying this process because of sobriety. Number one, I think I would have chickened out because of anxiety if I were drinking. Number two, I would have felt ugly and bloaty, but now I'm kind of happy with how I look on Zoom because of weight loss and bright eyes and no bloat. Number three, I would probably have had a few drinks to "loosen up" and thus have blown the audition. So, I have no illusions that this will go all the way (but hey, somebody's got to be on the show, right?), but it's a really fun adventure--my first alcohol-free one. A nice little bright spot in a crazy-*kitten* year.8
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Wow, that "kitten" button is fast. I even tried to doctor up the "naughty" word.3
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When I was little my grandparents always ordered a Shirley Temple for me and a Roy Rogers for my brother. I think they were the same drink. Sugary nonalcoholic drinks in a martini glass with a cherry. Good memories.4
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I love Shirley Temples and make them for my grandgirls as a special treat. I just use gingerale and the juice in the maraschino cherry glass, plus cherries of course! For me, I use seltzer water and the cherry juice. I'm trying to cut out soda.
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And all these weight loss stories are motivating me! Thanks for sharing your successes!3
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Confession:
I took a consulting job - very spur of the moment. Only a 5 day gig. It is in disaster restoration which is my wheelhouse.
Tonight, one of the tenants of the condo where I’m working had a big gulp vodka cranberry. This has been my hardest craving yet!!! Even thought “when I get off work, there is a liquor store around the corner.”
I skipped the liquor store. Still craving this, but going to bed and hope the urge is gone tomorrow!8 -
Thanks for the Shirley Temple memories! I'm lazy now and stick to Diet Ginger Ale and Seltzer, but I think it may be time for a trip down memory lane soon!
Beka, I still very much have the urge to "unwind" but I read somewhere about "surfing" the urge. For me the urge comes after a long day of work or at the end of a relaxing one. I know that the wolf will stick his head up around 5 and I know it's coming. When you see the wave coming, you stand a better chance of riding it out.
Dax reminds us all that the very second we think we've got this....we don't. What's the old saying? As long as you get back up one more time than you get knocked down?7 -
Thats true. The second we think we got this think again. I thought I was deserving of some Birthday wine with my birthday dinner. Its funny that I entertained the idea. I dont even like wine. Just seeking that break from reality let loose happy feeling.
I didnt. Ate all the birthday cake and food though. Had zero control of that situation. So after 4 days of recklessness I have to pull the reigns back in. All or nothing same mentality different vice. But its the proof I need to show me I dont have it all together and quite possibly never will.
Carrot juice shots tomorrow3 -
@aroze0928 now I see what 0928 means!!!
Happy birthday!!!!
Today is my birthday!!! We almost shared one!4 -
No one should feel guilty eating birthday cake on their birthday for Heaven's sake! It's my sister's birthday Sunday and I am bringing the cake and I plan on having a slice. Anyone staying (or attempting to stay) sober should feel OK indulging in this comparatively harmless treat. That being said, I have dropped 3 lbs thanks to the inspiring stories of weight loss here. Obviously wine has no place in my weight loss efforts.
I heard or read somewhere recently...I think it was Belle from Tired of Thinking about Drinking, "Where do I want to be in 6 months? Still here, wishing I was sober/healthier?" It really resonated with me. I know 6 months from now I definitely want to be sober and have lost quite a bit of weight. So, I am keeping a calendar with my weight and notes and goals. Not to bash my spouse, but he came home with a 6 pack of heavy beer last night. After a beer and a healthy dinner he had another beer which led to huge bag of cheese popcorn followed by 2 bowls of ice cream. I watched in amazement, knowing damn well this would have been me had I started in with even 1 drink. By giving up drinking I have given up the mindless eating. Hopefully that will continue to drive off the pounds. And now I need to go for a walk. Have a wonderful day my Friends!5 -
Oh and Happy Birthday to Beka and Aroze!4
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@aroze0928 now I see what 0928 means!!!
Happy birthday!!!!
Today is my birthday!!! We almost shared one!
Happy Birthday!! Hope its a great one!2 -
I'm up sleepless at 12:30. I wanted to post because tonight I had a real "F#*k It!" moment regarding sobriety. I'm feeling depressed about the ridiculous political situation in our country and depressed about going on 7 months of pandemic. Even though I have so much to be grateful for (a job, plenty to eat), it was pity party time. I didn't drink. Today is day 89 of not drinking. I didn't drink because I considered how it would feel to awaken at 3:00 with a pounding heart and panic. However . . . I also considered that it wouldn't be any worse than the dread and depression I was feeling, and I know for a fact that alcohol would relieve that dread and depression, albeit temporarily. I feel like I can't drink. Kate Bee would say, "Of course you can. No one is stopping you." But I feel like I've gone so far down this avenue that I really can't let myself drink. Tonight I actually resented myself for that, in a very weird way.
Anyway, I've posted about the positives--great sleep, weight loss, even a Jeopardy audition. Thought I might as well post about the down times. Sobriety is a joy much of the time. It's also a struggle. Same thing is true of life. I've chosen to go down this path, and I don't think I'm going to veer off of it. I can't project the future, but I know tonight I'm not veering. Still depressed as hell. But I think sobriety is worth the discomfort right now. I didn't realize I've reached that point. I'm glad of it. That's all. Thanks for being a safe community for this ramble.8
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