WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR NOVEMBER 2022

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  • Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 25,687 Member
    edited November 2022
    GodMomKim wrote: »
    Well finally yesterday I tested negative for Covid, so 2 more days of full masking in and outside per doctors orders and then just at my discretion - Having had Covid, I don’t know if I will ever take my mask off indoors with bigger groups of people, especially those I do not know. I wanted to believe it was a “bad cold” or minor flu, but for me it was not. I was miserable.

    One of the things I had not shared as I really did not want to think about it is that in the week I got covid my house turned 62 and celebrated by breaking down…. REALLY I would have rather done a party. But the plumbing system under the house sprung a leak, the heater stopped working (granted it is a crappy wall unit that heats mostly a bathroom) the fireplace insert blower stopped working and I used a space heater and melted an electrical connection. So as I called around for different professionals to fix the issues, no one will come into a home with Covid. So I waited, and managed. But yesterday ½ of the plumbing under my home was fully replaced, today the wall unit has been repaired. So I have water and some heat. Thursday the electrician comes over and I have a call in about the fireplace. Gratitude to the repair professionals, gratitude to indoor plumbing, a heater, and electrical is immense.
    And while nothing has been cheap, both of the professionals have been helpful on how to shave dollars off the total, and to make this work the best for me. Again grateful!!!

    Kim in N. California


    You've been under a lot of stress lately!! And I've heard that some aspects of COVID can last a long time.

    GodMomKim wrote: »
    So my question is what do you give to neighbors, friends, and service providers? All my neighbors bring me gifts, and when I was a gardener all my clients gave me a Christmas gift or tip, and even now some of my more regular embroidery clients give me Christmas gifts/tips. If I did not do cookies, I would be out spending far more on gifts to these folks. Last year I ended up with 4 beautiful poinsettias, a couple of starbucks cards, and 6 (ish) bottles of wine. Any one of those cost more than a single tray of cookies, and like Debbie I do customize the trays if I know what one family really likes.

    Confused in California - Kim

    I'm sorry you feel you have to give something to all those people, but glad that they reciprocate with some nice things. :)



    GodMomKim wrote: »
    The spoiler is full of a first world whine….
    I do love traditions and sometimes they stop being fun, or enjoyable and become something that is an obligation. My mom has traditions that are fully obligations, and she is unwilling or unable (at 93) to accept that these traditions can be altered or changed in any way. The winter holidays are full of these from Halloween to New Years it is minefield of stuff that was fun and grew and grew into a nightmare.
    One of those is cookie making. Last year we made 8 types of cookies, 2 types of candy a total of 150-160 dozen pieces and they were divided up and given out to friends, neighbors, and service providers (aka the pool guy, hairdresser…) they are put on paper plates and delivered in the week or so before Christmas. When I was a kid we did a few kinds and they were given to a few people, and they were always on a beautiful 3 tier cookie tray when my folks entertained over the holidays. I am not sure when this got so out of control. When I moved out on my own, I did start cooking my own cookies – maybe 4 kinds and giving them out to friends, and having them as the desert for my entertaining. I do have to say that my family likes to entertain. I do not remember any time when there was not at least one “fancy” dinner party per month in my home, and many other times when there was an extra person or two for dinner.
    Making my own cookies and handing out a few trays to folks was a nice way to acknowledge neighbors and friends without spending a ton of money. For the last 10-15 years Mom and I have done it together and it was fun. But for the last 5-7 years mom can not do it alone, and the list has grown, as she has encouraged my brother to put his friends on the list and her grandson (who she raised) to do the same. 2 years ago, I broke my budget and was exhausted after 4 days of cooking cookies at my house for 12 hours a day. Also, I provided 3 homecooked meals a day. Mom helps with the finances but not enough. Last year I recruited help – her grandson and his girlfriend came and helped – it was better but not enough and this last year my mom has slowed down and is less able to process multiple things. So with encouragement from my counselor, I started to really get some control over this event. It turns out that my brother gives 5 trays, my nephew (mom’s grandson) 11 trays, my mom 6 trays and I do 15 trays. 36 total trays. My mom puts together all of the trays but mine, and averages 3 dozen cookies per tray. That’s 108 dozen and none left for entertaining. This needed to be brought under control!!!!
    Of all the cookies we do only one is really a family tradition cookie it is a deep fried cookie we call it a rosette, almost a sweet crepe batter, a shaped mold is heated dipped into the batter and then deep fried. Top with powdered sugar and they are yummy.
    Discussion time with mom was painful. She felt I didn’t love her, I wanted to ruin one of her last Christmas’; make her friends forget her before she was even dead…. And believe it or not she is an inflation denier. She was adamant that food prices have not gone up since last year. Well after a couple of hours, we only took 3 trays off the list, BUT we dropped the candy, dropped one of the cookies, and swapped out a very time consuming cookie for a bar cookie. And decided that there were 11 trays that could be all rosettes and no other cookies. The other thing I have done is bought the trays – and they are smaller (not a lot- as that would cause it own set of problems) but a bit smaller so it will only be 2-2.5 dozen per tray. Just that lowers the number of cookies by 18 dozen. I will still be exhausted but I will be able to keep this at 4 days of cooking and control the budget a bit. I do feel like this is a win!

    Kim in N. California

    Congratulations on the win!! :)

    I can see your mother's perspective at her age - this is the way she's always done it. And at her age, she's not going to change much. But at some point it will be all up to you. I commend you on starting to take charge of that.

    Were you able to reduce the number of your trays in that process?



    Your story did trigger my memories of my life with my ex-husband and living very close to his family ... especially around Christmas time. We didn't have much money the whole time we were married, but come Christmas they would take pride in burying the 7 ft Christmas tree in presents. There were so many presents, you couldn't see the tree.

    Plus there was so much food, so much baking, so many people, just so much of everything.

    And for me ... so much stress.

    My family is entirely different - much more minimal, low key and quiet. The first Christmas after my ex-husband and I separated, it was such an incredible relief.


    You may start feeling that relief, starting this year. :)


    I also have to add that I'm in awe of people who can cook for others. I'm not that confident.


    Machka in Oz

  • Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 25,687 Member
    evie1958 wrote: »
    Machka, I'm with Lisa on curling up in the fetal position after having read about your surgery and limitations afterwards. I do hope all goes well and according to plan.

    Evelyn, Vancouver Island


    It's probably a sign of how exhausted and over everything I am that I'm actually looking forward to the post-surgery week(s) of doing next to nothing.

    I'm not looking forward to the surgery, especially since it will be a local anaesthetic. I'm a little frightened! I tried to watch a YouTube video about it to get to know the process, and couldn't do it.

    But lying in bed or sitting in my chair and just reading or colouring sounds like heaven!



    Machka in Oz

  • Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 25,687 Member
    30 Days of Gratitude
    ccz3itve5r6y.png


    1. Smell - freshly cut grass on our lawn.
    2. Technology - the amazing advancements in medical technology.
    3. Colour - blue. Beautiful blue sky peaking through the clouds.
    4. Food - soup. That's what I've been eating just recently because there's less chewing. We always keep a few cans of soup on hand for situations like these.
    5. Sound - my music. I've recently acquired a number of nature sounds CDs with music playing along with sounds of ocean waves, birds, and so on. Lovely.
    6. Nature - I love nature. It would be incredibly difficult for me to pick just one thing. I am so grateful that there is nature and that I can enjoy it.
    7. Memory - Winter 2017. The last time I visited my parents and a wonderful 1-month holiday to Canada that June/July. My husband and I did two cycling events and a lot of other cycling. We climbed mountains and explored a glacier. We visited friends and family.
    Memories:
    https://www.flickr.com/photos/machka-bb/albums/72157682899188730
    8. Book - Norman Doidge's The Brain's Way of Healing. I found it inspirational!
    https://www.normandoidge.com/?page_id=1042
    9. Place - home. I've moved and travelled a lot and home is wherever I happen to feel really comfortable. Right now, home is a certain house here in Tasmania where I can go and just be myself (mostly, for even a little while). Home is where I can lie down on the sofa and doze off when I've had a rough day, like I did yesterday.
    10. Taste - salt. My favourite taste. :) On the one hand I need salt because of my exercise and medications, on the other hand I need to reduce my salt because of my kidneys. But given the choice, I'll usually go salty over sweet ... or maybe salty and sweet!
    11. Holiday - Christmas!!!!
    12. Texture - smoothness. I like smooth clothes, smooth sheets, Rhody's smooth fur ...
    13. Abilities - I don't really think of myself in terms of having abilities. I've sort of thought of myself as "the jack of all trades, master of none". However, organisation is one that I've been thankful for throughout my life.
    14. Sight - the beauty all around. In our yard, where we go cycling, where I work, and travelling around this island.
    15. Season - I like the seasons in the following order from best to worst: Summer, Autumn ............ Spring ................... Winter.
    16. What about your body are you grateful for? Healing ... that it heals. Mostly anyway, and perhaps imperfectly, but healing does take place.
    17. What knowledge are you grateful for? Everything I do know. It all contributes to my work, my carer role, and my other activities.


    Machka in Oz
  • TerriRichardson112
    TerriRichardson112 Posts: 19,145 Member
    Kim: I did read your post, and admire your expertise as a baker. You do you, and I’m sure the recipients love your personal touch with the cookies, toffee and fudges.
    Christmas cookies are just not a thing in UK. I do think many of us find the temptations of festive food daunting, but please don’t take that as a criticism of your generous soul, which we love and appreciate.

    I know how difficult it must have been to deal with your elderly mother over this matter. It’s hard for them to accept that they are no longer capable of doing what they want to do, and they have a lifetime of experience to draw in to get others to do what they want.



  • Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 25,687 Member
    Very glad I found this group! I’m 56, a chronic pain patient, and love the conversations I’ve been seeing in here. Since I’m a CPP I’m very limited in my mobility which makes my weight loss a little more challenging. I started with this APP on September 22( coincidentally my birthday) I have lost 24 pounds so far! I finally (with the help of my husband) took apart the spare bedroom and donated the queen sleigh bed to charity. Then I moved my craft table from the garage into the house. I now finally have a. craft room! I haven’t been able to work on anything because it took me one day to move everything into the house then another day just to set up my workspace. With any hope, I’ll !be able to do something tomorrow! Right now my favorite craft to do is work with resin! Messy but lots of fun! I’ll post pictures of some work once I have something worthy. I truly hope I can build some friendships in this room. I look forward to talking with you all!!

    Kimberly in NE Alabama

    😁

    @kasullivan1966 ... I'm interested in hearing more about your work with resin.

    I am hoping to start doing the same thing soon. I've got a couple kits to start with and experiment with.

    My goal is to create a "pool" for my dry stream garden project.



    Machka in Oz

  • Katla49
    Katla49 Posts: 10,385 Member
    It is 4am and cold outside. I am snuggled in my quilt and warm enough under the covers. Today is bone density day. It is 4 am now. I will stay warm under the covers until morning. Then alondrate will strengthen my bones. 😊
  • auntiebk
    auntiebk Posts: 2,619 Member
    Welcome back @peggyad3 Peggy from Philly!
    Evelyn hope you aren’t as shocked as I was at the increased prices the US postal Service charges for those flat rate boxes. Sometimes wrapping in my own box and weighing (on my food scale  ) works out to cost a little less.
    Karen Con VERY gratulations on the ID, the apartment all the help you’ve given your brother coming to fruition. Jencare Medical sounds wonderful. Wish there were more like it everywhere. Smooth move video made me laugh AND cringe every time the handsome prince ate some rainbow soft serve. [shudder]
    Tracey, Tumble and Shadow are not yet well behaved in public, but this on-line dog games training course is giving me great hope. AND they (and Joe  ) are better behaved at home every day. So very sorry to hear your work situation is still dreadful.
    Lisa thanks for the reminder. Our mortgage, electricity, PartD insurance, and CareCredit (for recent dental work) bills are autopaid from checking. Will see if I can set up PartD by credit card next time. “. . .and casseroles started showing up at the door within a few hours of a death in the family.” Yes this. One friend who’d moved far away, sent a ham to a recently widowed co-worker. It was sorely needed and much appreciated. One of the only casseroles Joe will eat is Mama’s “Lutheran Ladies’ Grief Casserole.” Yours to Machka, ditto. And OWW for 3 veins rolling away and hitting that nerve! (gentle hugs)
    Lanette “Cheerios” LOL! Tumble knows the word “Chicken” and if its mentioned in conversation her ears prick up and her head whiplashes around to see where it is. Thanks for the reminder about PayPal, will check to make sure not linked to my checking account.
    Allie https://youtu.be/Yskf94MYM1I her laughter is so infectious it brought me to tears. Thanks!
    Katla Brava for enjoying the snow in your new location.
    Margaret so sorry your DH’s latest treatment has been a disaster and he’s taking it out on you. Prayers and encouragement for your so-ver-hard-to-do boundary setting. ((hugs))
    Flea “training the humans” isn’t that the truth! :love: Nurse Kitty.
    Debbie your “No. You say ‘Thank You’” response to your MIL was brilliant! Fingers X’d for Jona’s ultrasound. Brava for your self care wetlands walks. OUCH for having biopsies taken that were large enough to require stitches. ((hugs))
    Barbie “Jingle Bell Rock” choking on my water ;)
    Rebecca how I envy you the coordination to be able to juggle!
    Machka hope your recovery goes smoothly and you can enjoy at least some of your holidays.
    Heather, yours to Machka. Thanks again for sharing your cruise. Enjoy your pottery lesson.
    Kim so sorry you felt no one understood your post. I sure did. That was a hard fought win you won.
    Tina brava for eliminating exhausting cooking for unappreciative family. Saves your energy for cooking for others who enjoy it.
    Rita congrats on the good Dr. report! A nearby organic, sustainable dairy herd is 100% A2/A2, not A1. https://alexandrefamilyfarm.com/pages/what-is-a2-a2-organic-milk . Spendy but delicious.
    Carol I’d like to be more compassionate and less judgmental too. If you find the key, please share!
    Vicki glad chiropractor is giving you some relief. What you and Flea and others have said about the positive memories associated with Christmas baking. That is the strong motivator for me, plus the fact that I LOVED Mama’s cookies. :naughty:
    Annie brava for getting at least half your yoga in this morning. I skipped mine entirely :*(
    Michele your MD appointment results made me smile. And “I know what’s going into them, who knows what lab concoction you are putting in your body when you use that premade stuff?” Truth this!

    Gratitude 15: season: it used to be autumn but now it’s summer.
    16: body: that it’s still able to move.

    Joe’s stirring so time to sign off.

    Done:
    11/16: Move: 1 set pt, line dance class, dog games, Jeopardy walking steps:8674
    Fuel: plants (running count for week) so far: almonds, apple, artichoke, avocado, beans-cannellini, beans-garbanzo, beans-green, beets, broccoli florets, broccoli stalk, carrots, cauliflower, celery, corn on the cob, cherries-dried, cranberries-dried, cucumber, garlic, grapefruit, maraschino cherry, mushrooms, mustard greens, orange, pecans, radish, romaine, satsumas, snap peas, snow peas, sweet peppers-orange, sweet peppers-red, tomato-sauce, walnuts, wasabi peas, wheat-pasta/bread. CI<CO=Y
    Live: Joe, readings, BP, casserole-a-thon, post office to return nightgown and undies, recycling Wt: 138.0
    11/15: Move: 2 sets pt, dog games, steps:3149 :P
    plants (running count for week) so far: almonds, apple, artichoke, avocado, beans-cannellini, beans-garbanzo, beans-green, beets, broccoli florets, broccoli stalk, carrots, cauliflower, celery, corn on the cob, cherries-dried, cranberries-dried, cucumber, garlic, grapefruit, maraschino cherry, mushrooms, mustard greens, orange, pecans, radish, romaine, satsumas, snap peas, snow peas, sweet peppers-orange, sweet peppers-red, tomato-sauce, walnuts, wasabi peas, wheat-pasta/bread.CI<CO=Y
    Live: Joe, readings, BP, finished Advent devotional.
    Wt: 138.2

    Lighter, lovelies!
    Barbara, the Southern Oregon Coastie AHMOD x8zcp1ya37k1.gif
    2022: Be still and listen.
    November: Move more (7515 steps), fuel better (protein + vegs), live NOW (time with Joe, Tumble and Shadow).
  • ginnytez
    ginnytez Posts: 1,411 Member
    Flea-sorry sense of smell went. I thought that happened earlier on with Covid, but who knows. Friends it has happened to tell me it is very disconcerting. Hope it is short lived.

    Lisa-for years I had the same problem with veins rolling and giving blood, etc. was traumatic. The last few years it has gotten better (no idea why). My last bad one was 4-5 years prior to a surgery. Had a young intern who was first day in OR. Tried to tell her she was missing it. She ignored my concern. Woke up with entire hand bruised horribly. Filed a complaint with medical center against her. Missing a vein is an extremely painful event.

    Allie-very sweet Carmine read to Miles. Doesn't have to be great dramatic reading-has to do with sibling time!

    Machka-good luck with the surgeries. Does not sound comfortable, but if it takes care of the issue it is worth it.

    My random thoughts on communication:
    I think it is easy for misunderstandings to occur when people only communicate via writing. We depend upon the full context to understand a person. When I am talking with you I can tell a lot from your facial expression and body and the helps to respond to things. It. is easy when only using the one mode to miss what is most important to someone. Also, just like in regular conversations, one comment sparks a thought in someone's head, they express it, reminds the next person of something else and before you know it the original conversation is left behind. I used to get upset when my husband would not react the way I wanted him to. I finally realized he wasn't inside my head to know the answer! Got much less frustrating after that. Kind of like the understanding someone's love language. Not meaning to insult or judge anyone-just sort of my view of life as I see it

    Working today (what's new?) Have to go to out of county meeting this morning. That should finish around 1. Will drive back home and end work day then. Have a bit of extra time and worse case can use a bit of vacation I need to use. That will let me get my walk in before going to work at Food Pantry. I still can't lift but I help with calling out orders and seeing to it cars get what they are supposed to. Should be nice and chilly tonight. We switched to drive through pantry during Covid and are keeping it up. Better that having 100 or more people stuffed in church basement with poor ventilation!

    Take care all,

    Ginny in Ohio
  • grandmallie
    grandmallie Posts: 10,145 Member
    Morning Ladies
    About rolling veins.. gosh after my surgeries every darn day they were coming in doing blood draws ,I would cry because if you dont get a good phlebotomist ,your in for it and they would come in at 5 am every morning to wake you up.. rolling small veins is what I have. I did have a port in my neck for awhile but they wanted that out and not use that.
    Geesh I don't even want to think about it all.yikes..
    Enough about that..
  • teklawa1
    teklawa1 Posts: 678 Member
    <3
    Betsy in NW WA
  • minicooper452
    minicooper452 Posts: 651 Member
    Grateful for...
    17-*knowledge-that I really do have everything I need
    Love and Blessings, Carla, in MN
  • sh0tzz99
    sh0tzz99 Posts: 971 Member
    Machka9 wrote: »
    This would be ideal! And might indeed be what I'll be doing. :)

    8dshaacb2dwh.png



    Machka in Oz

    Yes, that does indeed sound absolutely perfect!

    Tina in CA
  • GodMomKim
    GodMomKim Posts: 3,708 Member
    :)
  • drkatiebug
    drkatiebug Posts: 1,980 Member
    I am still testing positive for Covid. How long does this last? I am going stir crazy. I have not really been sick other than the cough. No fever, no loss of taste or smell, I woke up yesterday morning feeling so good. I just knew I was going to have a negative test. Nope. Not yesterday. Not today. I am supposed to deliver certificates to my lay servant academy on Saturday. That may not happen now. I have two associates taking care of the classes, but the certificates need my signature and theirs. If Dave tests positive for as long as I have, we may have to cancel Thanksgiving. We still have a week. I am ever hopeful!

    Kim, I confess I missed your original post about the extent of yours and your mother's cookie making venture. Thanks to someone, Machka, I think, who quoted it so I could catch up with the conversation. I think I missed it originally because it was in a spoiler and I was skimming to catch up. I am proud of you for baby-stepping the reduction of the job while still acknowledging your Mother's feelings about it. I get where she's coming from. This is a tradition that is important to her. I always appreciate the gift of consumables, myself, because we can enjoy them and then they are gone. If it is too much, we can always share with others after the gift-giver is gone. I would never, ever, in a million years reject someone's gift outright. People and their feelings are always the most important thing to me.

    I am seriously back on my eating plan. I think I have established boundaries that I can follow most days. One day at a time, but yesterday was a successful, boundary-following day. For anyone who is interested, I'll put my boundaries in a spoiler.
    Primary boundaries: 3 meals a day + 1 snack. Secondary boundaries: 2 meals are 1/4 plate protein, 1/4 plate complex carb, 1/2 plate veggies. 1 meal is a smoothie made with plant based protein powder, fruit, veggies, fat, fiber and non-dairy unsweetened milk. Snack is high protein, usually some kind of protein bar like Aloha, or cheese, meat stick, fruit and nut-butter, that kind of thing. Nothing considered a carb unless it is fruit. macro goals: 1800 calories or less (it's usually more like 1600), protein 90 grams or more. Yesterday I had 120 grams of protein. If I reach a point where I stop losing weight, I will revisit the number of calories. My goal is to create a calorie deficit, but not a big one. I used my goal weight times 12 to come up with 1800. Too much of a calorie deficit creates cravings and causes me to binge. I know this about myself. Another secondary boundary is that I can have dessert in small portions in social situations only.
    My diary is open to my friends, so if anyone wants to look at my food choices and comment, I'd welcome the feedback. I was doing really well following this plan at this time last year, but it got derailed with my father's illness and I haven't gotten back to it.
  • Whidislander
    Whidislander Posts: 3,887 Member
    My Christmas presents to my brother and DSIL are sorted as I've just donated to the food bank they requested. :D I thought they would need the money before Christmas. The choice of donation makes all of us very happy. <3

    My flowers for an early birthday present for the same DSIL are due to be delivered today. They are off to Rome the day after her birthday, for a combined birthday/25th anniversary holiday, so I've sent them 10 days early. :) Mustn't forget to post cards next week. Will put it in my calendar as I've mentally dusted it off. ;)

    I'm going to have an early Sushi meal tonight before my pottery session. Hooray! DH doesn't like sushi, so it's a great opportunity. He is going to cook his signature chicken stew for himself and we will have the leftovers tomorrow night.

    Lots of love, Heather UK xxxxxxxx

    Its nice to have meals exclusively yours.👍🏻💖. It makes the experience that extra special! Every so often I have a sushi night, with California rolls, edemame, gyoza and good strong tea, or a beer.
    Rebecca
    Whidbey
    Wa
  • Vickil57
    Vickil57 Posts: 1,894 Member
    <3