going dutch on a first date

I cant afford to date
so I stay single

That got me so sad but i still laughed

The polite thing to do is to pay for the date if you asked him out and allow him to pay if he asked you out.

But this is all about your expectations, as far as gender roles are concerned. Frankly, I appreciate and respect traditional gender roles because I think they are based on our biological tendencies. Women and men are equal in the workplace and in the eyes of the law, but socially, we are very, very different creatures. One is not better or worse than the other; we're just different, which, by definition, means we are not equal. I think romantic relationships are more harmonious when men and women fill complementary roles, rather than the woman trying to take on more of the male responsibilities to prove she's on the same level, or a man trying to control his chivalrous impulses so the woman doesn't think he's being sexist. At some point, you're going to come to resent each other over the fact that you can't just be who you are.

Since the dawn of time, there have been women who used men like ATM machines, so I am not suggesting that this doesn't happen; what I am suggesting is that, as a man, you should be able to tell the difference between a woman like that and a woman who believes that a grown man who is interested enough to ask her out actually WANTS to buy her dinner. For example, I am well-educated, have a great job, have my own place, my own car, pay my own bills. I am clearly not a gold-digger; I am the epitome of the "independent" woman. But I'm also not going to offer to pay for a dinner that YOU invited me to share with you. If you expect me to and are going to make judgments about my character based on the fact that I didn't, then it's best that we don't see each other again because we are not going to get along well.

A woman who will only spend time with you if you pay. Hmm, there's a word for that. It escapes me at the moment.

It's on the tip of my tongue...hmmm hmmm.

For me...I think it depends. But for me, I'd take turns each time going out. Or maybe depending upon what the date involves. If he offers to pay for food, I'd offer to pay for tip, or something else along the date. I'm just prepared to pay at any minute.

How YOU doin'?????? LOL

The person who asked should offer to pay the bill in full, no matter their gender. This also applies to platonic friendships - if you ask someone to go with you somewhere then it's implied that you're also offering to pay (unless of course you have along standing history of doing things differently). That's just my opinion though and I know many would disagree but I don't ask someone to go out to dinner/coffee with me unless I plan on affording our entire bill. I just believe it's polite to pick up the check when you're doing the asking.

If you want a guy that pays, then don't stay with him. He has an equal right to want a girl to go dutch. There is no rule.

No.

This gets me sh1t with the feministy types....of which I am one. But hair, clothes, shoes, makeup....the list goes on and on. These are all things I'm expected to pay for. Most men I know had their parents paying for their clothes up until college and own 3 or 4 pairs of shoes. I think that if I'm expected to dress up to go out on dates or to the bar and I have to pay for all that sh1t, then it's not too crazy to have a few of my drinks paid for or my meal.

And I'm not going to be a b1tch. If you can't afford my rum and coke or my $7-10 meal, we probably shouldn't be dating. No scrubs.

But it's funny how the gender norm I agree with is the one where I get free sh1t. Very rarely do gender norms swing towards the ladies.

Screw this. Let's just dine and dash ladies. Who's in?

The person who asked should offer to pay the bill in full, no matter their gender. This also applies to platonic friendships - if you ask someone to go with you somewhere then it's implied that you're also offering to pay (unless of course you have along standing history of doing things differently). That's just my opinion though and I know many would disagree but I don't ask someone to go out to dinner/coffee with me unless I plan on affording our entire bill. I just believe it's polite to pick up the check when you're doing the asking.

Yikes, I don't agree. If I ask one of my girlfriends to meet me for cocktails, I don't think either of us is expecting I'm going to pay the tab. Does this actually happen to people? That would make happy hour a nightmare....

Groups are a bit different than meeting one on one. Like I said, if you have a history with a friend of going dutch for drinks/dinner/coffee then what I said does not apply. And obviously if couples are going out together I would say that dutch treat is implied regardless of who is asking unless it's a special occassion and you say, "Can we take you/you two out to dinner for your birthday?"

This gets me sh1t with the feministy types....of which I am one. But hair, clothes, shoes, makeup....the list goes on and on. These are all things I'm expected to pay for. Most men I know had their parents paying for their clothes up until college and own 3 or 4 pairs of shoes.

Lol, notsureifsrs

Srs

Every one pays in the end lol