Confession Time! ((ABSOLUTELY NO JUDGEMENT))
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pofoster21 wrote: »pofoster21 wrote: »Okay, I deleted my last post, but I'm going to reword it here, it's regarding the DLB comments.
It bothers me that people are being encouraged to be more body positive, and not body shame people who are overweight, but people who are super fit are still picked apart. I get it, I don't want to look like DLB either, but I don't think it's right to say she looks manly or scary. It's still body shaming. Just because she's muscular/fit doesn't make it okay. People wouldn't post things like that about an obese person, or they'd be torn apart!
I hope that makes sense. I know it's judgment free and I think you are all super great, but I just had to put my $0.02 in.
I wondered what your 'deleted' meant. Good point. I don't care for that look. I don't care for the anorexic look either. Both are too extreme. But totally get your point. And won't do it again and luckily, its within the hour, so I'll go delete it!
That's totally fine. Everyone's "ideal" varies of course.
It may have been mentioned already way back, but there's a double standard on body acceptance. You (general you) can't put down or say anything bad about an overweight person, but skinny people are told to "eat a hamburger" or accused of being anorexic when they're not. For some reason it's more acceptable to make remarks to a skinny person. I'm not sure why. I can only imagine the types of comments women like DLB must get, and while they might be used to it, I know I wouldn't want to hear unnecessary negative comments about my body.
That is so true. I don't personally want to look like her, but I can't even imagine the amount of discipline and determination she has.
I totally agree with the double standard. It's not right. Having been on the thinner side my whole life, I've gotten steady comments about how I don't eat enough or how I need to eat more how I can't possibly be full after just eating a sandwich or a bowl of cereal. And now that I've been working out regularly, they make comments about how I don't need to workout or I workout too much. Blah, blah, blah.
How and what I eat are no concern of yours, so mind ya own bidness. As much as I love Mr. Mo, he's horrible about saying things like this to me. It's hurtful.
I can get this. I was really hurt last time I visited my Mom she is always criticizing me for my weight (being too heavy) now all she could say was I was too thin... Its like ... seriously, Mom, can't I ever be just right?????????
Maybe not exactly the same but I was hurt. I like the way I look right now. So there!
It is the same, and my mom is not the greatest at compliments or encouragement either. Luckily, I don't find my self-worth by her validation. Not saying that you do, I'm just saying.
Moms can be such jerks sometimes. Myself included.
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kellyjellybellyjelly wrote: »I confess it always baffles me when someone brings up that I am left handed as it is some rare disease. Any other lefties here?
right here!!
the "omg, you're left handed?!?!" has gotten a bit old.
as has the "wow, i never knew you were left handed!"
ummm....because it doesn't really matter, perhaps?0 -
Random things I hope to do one day:
1) Kick down a door. Don't know why, it just looks fun. But based on how attempting to kick a fence board down went, I don't think I'll be very good at kicking in doors.
2) Flip a table when I'm mad. Preferably someone else's table, with their stuff on it.
Ooo I've always wanted to do #1 too!!! You're hilarious!
My friend emailed me to say she was going to have to cancel a workout, so I sent her this:
And it made me think of it.
this made me laugh-snort at work. Blowing my cover, @ShibaEars ... it's either you or @MoHousdon getting me in trouble with snickering while I'm s'posed to be doing serious bidness.
It's the consequences of being friends with awesomely funny people.
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kellyjellybellyjelly wrote: »
I wish I could. I don't have a huge chest by any means but these aren't supportive and I'd really like to try as hard as I can to prevent what I do have from sagging to my toes
Glad I'm not the only one!
They do work - I have one that kind of works, even, and I've got a very big chest. They're not great for lift or support, obviously, but they do shape and cover.
Have you tried a longline strapless? I have one from Freya that's got just a couple inches of "band" under the cup and it stays up like nobody's business with that extra fabric. Plus it looks cute, even.
I have a longline strapless... it's ancient, which means it's hardly worn... which probably means it didn't work terrifically well. But it is also low-back, so it's probably trying to fill too many needs at once. I may have to dig it out and try it.I have the sliding issue with the bandeaus I have, but the bra stayed put. It is one I bought for my brother's wedding 5 years ago that has the non-slide gel-like stuff that some of the no slip headbands have.
What are the backless stick-on bras? Don't think I've seen one before.
Come to think of it, all of my strapless bras are from the days when I wore a too-large band (when I followed the "add 5 inches" guideline) so that might be half the problem.
Backless bra:
edit to close parentheses, because that sort of thing keeps me up at night
How does that even stay up?!
Incomplete parentheses would haunt me too.
It's sticky on the inside, and after you wear it you rinse it carefully and leave it flat to dry and it gets sticky again. And like I mentioned, they're good for shape and coverage but obviously don't do anything lift-wise, really.
I'm glad the brownies worked out for you, @ythannah, and you don't think they taste like beans
My husband likes them more than real brownies because of the way the sweetness is cut back by the beans.
I'll have to try these brownies since I have around 3 cans of black beans.
Other than the black beans & brownie mix did you guys mix anything else in?
Not much of a baker here.
When I made the Chickpea Hummus Dough it was pretty good & I couldn't tell it was made with beans.
This has probably been answered already but the only other ingredient is water.
My instructions were to rinse the beans and the can thoroughly, drain the beans, then return the beans to the can and fill it with water. That was the mixture that got pureed. Into purple soup that smelled like cat food.
These black bean brownies are getting harder and harder to resist with detailed descriptions like that.
*I wish there was a sarcasm font.
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FluffySandwich wrote: »
German chocolate cake has a special place in my heart. My dad used to buy one for everyone on their birthday, thinking it was our favorite cake. The truth is it wasn't the favorite cake of any of us... except for my dad. I think he convinced himself everyone loved it as much as him. Now it always makes me think about himSusieq_1994 wrote: »xLoveLikeWinterx wrote: »I am known at work for making really good cakes, usually from scratch. Today one of the guys is leaving to take a job out of state, so they asked me to make him a German chocolate cake. I made it- box mix, can of frosting. Everyone is raving about how good it is. I don't know whether I should be flattered or disappointed.
ETA: Yay me, I can follow directions!
German Choc cake is the one I'm the most tempted to do this with. I never make anything out of a box (My kitchen would have to be on fire first lol) but German Choc Cake from scratch tastes almost exactly like a box mix. If anything, scratch made is less sweet and mild chocolate flavor. The cake is a cinch to make, but the frosting is a PITA. Making the caramel base and throwing in the pecans and stirring til your arms hate you on extremely low heat drives me nuts... My mom asks for a GC Cake every year for her birthday and I do it but every year I swear I'm substituting Duncan Hines...Then no matter how cold/cooled off the cake is, even if you do a crumb coat, frosting it is HARD.
This is the mix I used:
It is delicious! It has a separate packet of coconut pecan mix to add in before baking. It is super moist! I baked it in a 9 x 13 pan and frosted it with whatever brand of coconut pecan frosting I grabbed first. (Betty Crocker, I think?)
Edit: because spelling is hard.
Would I be driven out of the thread if I admitted that I'd most likely HATE German Chocolate cake? I hate nuts in everything (they can only be eaten alone, unless we're talking nut butter), and I really hate coconut in desserts--and in everything else. I can only eat it plain and fresh.
I also do like German chocolate cake, and I'm not a big cake person. I love coconut!
Apparently I loved licorice allsorts as a kid. I have no independent recollection of this.
My father buys me a HUGE tin of them every Christmas as a result.
I don't much care for them any more. Next tin is going to the office for the vultures to devour.
I have zero clue what this is.
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raelynnsmama52512 wrote: »Also checking in as another lefty! True story, when I was in elementary school, being left handed was apparently not acceptable and my teachers actually tried to force me to write right handed. Needless to say, it didn't go well, and eventually they gave up. Raelynn hasn't completely shown which hand is more dominant, but she does tend to use her left hand quite a bit. It must be a family thing since my mom and I are left handed and SIL is left handed too lol!
when i was in 1st grade mine did too!
looking back, it just seems like such a silly thing to be concerned with.0 -
pofoster21 wrote: »Okay, I deleted my last post, but I'm going to reword it here, it's regarding the DLB comments.
It bothers me that people are being encouraged to be more body positive, and not body shame people who are overweight, but people who are super fit are still picked apart. I get it, I don't want to look like DLB either, but I don't think it's right to say she looks manly or scary. It's still body shaming. Just because she's muscular/fit doesn't make it okay. People wouldn't post things like that about an obese person, or they'd be torn apart!
I hope that makes sense. I know it's judgment free and I think you are all super great, but I just had to put my $0.02 in.
I wondered what your 'deleted' meant. Good point. I don't care for that look. I don't care for the anorexic look either. Both are too extreme. But totally get your point. And won't do it again and luckily, its within the hour, so I'll go delete it!
That's totally fine. Everyone's "ideal" varies of course.
It may have been mentioned already way back, but there's a double standard on body acceptance. You (general you) can't put down or say anything bad about an overweight person, but skinny people are told to "eat a hamburger" or accused of being anorexic when they're not. For some reason it's more acceptable to make remarks to a skinny person. I'm not sure why. I can only imagine the types of comments women like DLB must get, and while they might be used to it, I know I wouldn't want to hear unnecessary negative comments about my body.
ETA: Now I'm stressed about these posts. I am not trying to stir anything up so I hope nobody takes offence to me stating my opinion.
I've heard it all my life, from my mother's "Men like women better who are pleasingly plump" to my coworker's "You look too skinny to live" to another coworker's "So.... *kitten* happens to skinny people too, eh?" when she overheard me talking to someone else about my lymphedema, like it was a trade-off for not being overweight.
I don't care for that DLB woman's body either... not sure how much of the look can be attributed to prepping and flexing and posing and possibly even a little graphic enhancement, however... but I don't have a hope of ever achieving that physique either, it's just not in my genes. Maybe if it was remotely possible I'd try for it, who knows? Everyone's goals and ideals are different.
This is more like what I can realistically aim for:
I can appreciate that.
I takeaway 3 things from this image:
1. She's nicely tan. I'm quite jealous as I'm like a nicely darker version of fluorescent.
2. I want her pants.
3. My hair NEVER looks that nice when I workout. Heck, my hair rarely looks that nice period. EVER.
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kellyjellybellyjelly wrote: »Susieq_1994 wrote: »FluffySandwich wrote: »
Thank you, that's very kind!!
Wow, I can't believe you just said you wish you could draw better...I think that is amazing. I love it! You are talented.
I'm not sure how to get this comment out of the quote so I'll just bold it. haha
I enjoy drawing/doodling but I never really worked that hard at being good at it. If I were to try to draw The Joker from memory it would probably end up look ridiculous 
Also... these black bean brownies are sounding so delicious. I usually buy black beans every week anyway because I find them useful to have around and I love them. I'm thinking brownies tonight! ... But that means buying more flour... which means I will probably make three pans of brownies in the next week. Oops.
You sound a bit like me. I'm not too awful at reproducing simple drawings if I have them right in front of me to copy, but otherwise I'm a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad artist.
They do, don't they? I want to make them too, but I know that it's a terrible idea... I don't have to worry too much, though--my husband won't let me get near any baking ingredients in the supermarket, as per my request to help me stay on target.
I'm so awful at drawing I can't even make a stick person look good.
Seconded! I have a hard time drawing a straight line using a ruler. Not even joking. I also can't cut along perforated lines. I rediscovered this Saturday.
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pofoster21 wrote: »orangesmartie wrote: »
Also this one
that is a great one!
Why can't I see these? There's nothing but blank space
Same here. 0 -
Confession: I LOVE burgers. I cannot RESIST a burger if it is offered. Officer Austin offered a Jack in the Box Ultimate Cheeseburger and I ate it. All 860 calories. Smurfed up my WHOLE day. It wasn't that great.
Confession: I regretted that burger a half mile into my run/jog/walk this morning. Now my tummy is SO angry at me.
Confession: I may never eat a low quality burger ever again. Even if it's free!
Oh and I TOTALLY RAN this morning. Well more like interval training, but it's SOMETHING! 0 -
FluffySandwich wrote: »FluffySandwich wrote: »
German chocolate cake has a special place in my heart. My dad used to buy one for everyone on their birthday, thinking it was our favorite cake. The truth is it wasn't the favorite cake of any of us... except for my dad. I think he convinced himself everyone loved it as much as him. Now it always makes me think about himSusieq_1994 wrote: »xLoveLikeWinterx wrote: »I am known at work for making really good cakes, usually from scratch. Today one of the guys is leaving to take a job out of state, so they asked me to make him a German chocolate cake. I made it- box mix, can of frosting. Everyone is raving about how good it is. I don't know whether I should be flattered or disappointed.
ETA: Yay me, I can follow directions!
German Choc cake is the one I'm the most tempted to do this with. I never make anything out of a box (My kitchen would have to be on fire first lol) but German Choc Cake from scratch tastes almost exactly like a box mix. If anything, scratch made is less sweet and mild chocolate flavor. The cake is a cinch to make, but the frosting is a PITA. Making the caramel base and throwing in the pecans and stirring til your arms hate you on extremely low heat drives me nuts... My mom asks for a GC Cake every year for her birthday and I do it but every year I swear I'm substituting Duncan Hines...Then no matter how cold/cooled off the cake is, even if you do a crumb coat, frosting it is HARD.
This is the mix I used:
It is delicious! It has a separate packet of coconut pecan mix to add in before baking. It is super moist! I baked it in a 9 x 13 pan and frosted it with whatever brand of coconut pecan frosting I grabbed first. (Betty Crocker, I think?)
Edit: because spelling is hard.
Would I be driven out of the thread if I admitted that I'd most likely HATE German Chocolate cake? I hate nuts in everything (they can only be eaten alone, unless we're talking nut butter), and I really hate coconut in desserts--and in everything else. I can only eat it plain and fresh.
I also do like German chocolate cake, and I'm not a big cake person. I love coconut!
Apparently I loved licorice allsorts as a kid. I have no independent recollection of this.
My father buys me a HUGE tin of them every Christmas as a result.
I don't much care for them any more. Next tin is going to the office for the vultures to devour. Gotta love dads.
I am one of the only people I know who actually likes licorice. I'm not really a fan of licorice flavored jelly beans, but I like licorice allsorts. I'd take em off your hands!
That's mighty kind of you to offer... watch for a 2 lb tin of them coming your way in January!FluffySandwich wrote: »... I still want to make those brownies, though. I have the ingredients, and I don't need any flour to make the black bean ones
Makethebrowniesmakethebrowniesmakethebrownies!!
Aww, I'm too slow. I love licorice of all kinds so I was going to volunteer to take them.
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raelynnsmama52512 wrote: »raelynnsmama52512 wrote: »I've spent these past few months and weeks so ridiculously stressed out and worried about everything. Between everything with Raelynn, our financial situation, and some other personal issues, I've been stretched so far thin it blows my mind. Hopefully now, I can breathe and shift a little of my focus to getting ready for tax school in 2 months (I have to go to a 10 week class each year to keep my job and certification) and get back to trying to get fit/healthier/lose weight. I know things are still going to be a bit rough and Raelynn isn't totally "out of the woods" as they say, but I'm finally feeling like I can somewhat breathe again, which is wonderful.
I'm SO glad things are working out for your family and the stress is lifting! Sounds like everything is starting to fall into place.
Thank you!
I really need to learn other ways to channel all my stress besides food. I guess that would be some motivation to get my butt in gear if I'm gonna run with all our CMM people!
Apparently, you can take a loan out on a 401k, so we may or may not have done so to take care of some things. Good news, we had a good bit left, so we may be actually able to finally go on our first real anniversary trip next weekend, since our anniversary happens to be next Saturday! I've been wanting to go back to Charleston, so we'll see! It's probably going to be just a day trip, as I don't want to disrupt Raelynn's routine too much by us going away overnight right now.
Glad things seem to be getting better. I hope you have a fun anniversary.
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kellienw335 wrote: »I'm back from vacation, and it's time to get back to logging and exercising after an almost three week hiatus! I tried to make good decisions when possible but didn't stress about it and enjoyed family and friends and drinks and food! Super excited that I am at the same weight today that I was before my vacations!!! Back to life, back to reality...
welcome back!!!0 -
lilaclovebird wrote: »For those who want to know, This is why I am mad at Sgt. Sexy Pants:
He sent me a text about how he was talking to another coworker
"She's talking about how she and her father hate the Chinese because they bombed Pearl Harbor."
I was stunned into silence. I finally responded with
"I don't even have words..."
He said: "Are you trying to figure out how that is wrong?"
I said: "Seriously?! You think I'm THAT dumb?! The Japanese bombed Pearl Harbor!"
He said: "Well now that you googled it."
All in all, not REALLY anything to be mad about but I gave him a big piece of my mind about how I have not one but TWO parents who served in the United States Armed Forces and my Grandfathers fought in WW2 so of COURSE I would know who bombed Pearl Harbor.
I bond with my father watching all kinds of war documentaries and I just can't believe he... I really just. UGH!
I can't believe he thinks so little of me and I'm wondering if I will get past it or not.
Any tips are welcome. I did send him a text saying I didn't know he thought so little of my intellect and that he really hurt my feelings. I have gotten nothing back.
Hugs.
Tip (1) get some rest before you decide anything / say anything more on the subject. That gives you better perspective and clarity of thought.
(2) Journal. Write all your crappy feelings out just to help you acknowledge them and sort through them. When I do this I challenge myself to also dig deeper and see if other things or other people are bothering me that I am channeling to whatever situation I think is bothering me. Sometimes there is. I also challenge myself and dig and figure out what I WANT from a situation. I also examine overall pattens, is this part of a pattern?
(3) When you are not actively upset with him talk to him. The way you word it is up to you. I would probably say something along the lines of:
What I understood from you was that you were saying / implying ______(whatever words you want to use saying that you felt he doubted your knowledge of these events). Ask him if that is what he meant. Listen to what he says and how he says it. Follow up questions so that you understand where he is coming from. Once you have some answers take more time to sort through his answers and examine yourself. Was there a misunderstanding? Do the answers you got from him satisfy you? Are you being treated the way you need to be treated? Respected? Etc. Do this examining by yourself and in your own time and then decide the next actions.
Hugs!!
First ^ I love this! I would follow this advice.
Second, I'm so sorry that you are going through this too Lilaclovebird.
My only other thought was maybe he was just joking around? Some people have a weird sense of humor. I dunno of course, you know him better than I do so you probably know for sure but I just wanted to put that out there. You've probably talked to him again by now but I'm behind still. Hope things are going better.0 -
lilaclovebird wrote: »For those who want to know, This is why I am mad at Sgt. Sexy Pants:
He sent me a text about how he was talking to another coworker
"She's talking about how she and her father hate the Chinese because they bombed Pearl Harbor."
I was stunned into silence. I finally responded with
"I don't even have words..."
He said: "Are you trying to figure out how that is wrong?"
I said: "Seriously?! You think I'm THAT dumb?! The Japanese bombed Pearl Harbor!"
He said: "Well now that you googled it."
All in all, not REALLY anything to be mad about but I gave him a big piece of my mind about how I have not one but TWO parents who served in the United States Armed Forces and my Grandfathers fought in WW2 so of COURSE I would know who bombed Pearl Harbor.
I bond with my father watching all kinds of war documentaries and I just can't believe he... I really just. UGH!
I can't believe he thinks so little of me and I'm wondering if I will get past it or not.
Any tips are welcome. I did send him a text saying I didn't know he thought so little of my intellect and that he really hurt my feelings. I have gotten nothing back.
Hugs.
Tip (1) get some rest before you decide anything / say anything more on the subject. That gives you better perspective and clarity of thought.
(2) Journal. Write all your crappy feelings out just to help you acknowledge them and sort through them. When I do this I challenge myself to also dig deeper and see if other things or other people are bothering me that I am channeling to whatever situation I think is bothering me. Sometimes there is. I also challenge myself and dig and figure out what I WANT from a situation. I also examine overall pattens, is this part of a pattern?
(3) When you are not actively upset with him talk to him. The way you word it is up to you. I would probably say something along the lines of:
What I understood from you was that you were saying / implying ______(whatever words you want to use saying that you felt he doubted your knowledge of these events). Ask him if that is what he meant. Listen to what he says and how he says it. Follow up questions so that you understand where he is coming from. Once you have some answers take more time to sort through his answers and examine yourself. Was there a misunderstanding? Do the answers you got from him satisfy you? Are you being treated the way you need to be treated? Respected? Etc. Do this examining by yourself and in your own time and then decide the next actions.
Hugs!!
ALL OF THIS!!! This is GREAT advice, @nonoelmo!!!!
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raelynnsmama52512 wrote: »Also checking in as another lefty! True story, when I was in elementary school, being left handed was apparently not acceptable and my teachers actually tried to force me to write right handed. Needless to say, it didn't go well, and eventually they gave up. Raelynn hasn't completely shown which hand is more dominant, but she does tend to use her left hand quite a bit. It must be a family thing since my mom and I are left handed and SIL is left handed too lol!
I do everything left handed except for writing and throwing.0 -
kellyjellybellyjelly wrote: »Susieq_1994 wrote: »FluffySandwich wrote: »
Thank you, that's very kind!!
Wow, I can't believe you just said you wish you could draw better...I think that is amazing. I love it! You are talented.
I'm not sure how to get this comment out of the quote so I'll just bold it. haha I enjoy drawing/doodling but I never really worked that hard at being good at it. If I were to try to draw The Joker from memory it would probably end up look ridiculous
Also... these black bean brownies are sounding so delicious. I usually buy black beans every week anyway because I find them useful to have around and I love them. I'm thinking brownies tonight! ... But that means buying more flour... which means I will probably make three pans of brownies in the next week. Oops.
You sound a bit like me. I'm not too awful at reproducing simple drawings if I have them right in front of me to copy, but otherwise I'm a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad artist.
They do, don't they? I want to make them too, but I know that it's a terrible idea... I don't have to worry too much, though--my husband won't let me get near any baking ingredients in the supermarket, as per my request to help me stay on target.
I'm so awful at drawing I can't even make a stick person look good.
Likewise.... my brothers are great artists. I'm like 'your stick figure has these awesome knees & elbows and mine just suck!'... video games though, I'll whoop their butts.
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Susieq_1994 wrote: »FluffySandwich wrote: »The way I want my body to look changes pretty much from day to day. Sometimes I want to look softer and I think the weight I'm at now is fine if I could just rearrange fat in some places and put it elsewhere. Sometimes I want to be much more slim, but still soft. Sometimes I want to look like superwoman and have super toned and muscled arms (not as muscled as that woman posted, but still awesome). I feel like I am never truly happy with my body.
I find women of all different body types beautiful
I find women of all body types beautiful... Except me!
Aww, so sad! I'm not sure why since you are beautiful too! 0 -
saraherren wrote: »My sweet dog passed away this morning and I couldn't be any more miserable.
(((((HUGS))))) So sorry!!!!0
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