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MFP Personals

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Replies

  • Posts: 2,817 Member
    Looking for adventurous man who won't cringe when I pull a lock box out from under the bed. Must be opened minded and don't run away screaming at the sound of a rubber glove being put on.

    We have a bag so your lock box will be like show and ... uhm ...
  • Posts: 9,563 Member
    edited May 2017
    Looking for a man with 'stamina' to share with 3-5 of my closest frenemies...we will fight over you, it won't be pretty...be forewarned you will be "loved" if not actually ripped apart by rivalry.
  • Posts: 999 Member
    Vikka_V wrote: »
    What I want from you:
    - for you to do what I want, when I want, how I want...but if you do I won't really respect you
    - basically be "on call" for whatever I require/desire and then go away

    What you'll get from me:
    - I couldn't tell you...I'm guessing not much

    According to my self-destructive history, you're exactly the person for me!
  • Posts: 1 Member
    Hello everyone
  • Posts: 4,984 Member
    Morgaen73 wrote: »

    We have a bag so your lock box will be like show and ... uhm ...

    :lol: hey now!!
  • Posts: 145 Member
    Looking for intelligent tech type man to speak "nerdy" to me. Calling out quadratic equations during sexy time is a plus. Explanation of how computers work and the ability to explain in terms I'll never understand is a must. Glasses optional.

    I'm not a guy but I speak discrete mathematics propositional logic. I can build a system, install a full development stack, including design applications, and then write you a beautiful, compact web application that might woo you in 50 lines of code or less :D
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  • Posts: 483 Member
    MomReborn wrote: »

    I'm not a guy but I speak discrete mathematics propositional logic. I can build a system, install a full development stack, including design applications, and then write you a beautiful, compact web application that might woo you in 50 lines of code or less :D

    That's hot
  • Posts: 22,834 Member
    Looking for mfp husband. Must be married in real life....single available men are not as appealing. Must be willing to make me feel special above all others, have the ability to make me smile, laugh and send me messages to not only brighten my day but also to prove you are thinking about me at least three times a day (preferably with meals). Telling me how beautiful you think I am is a must, especially on the days that I resemble Richard Simmons on a bender. Will receive payment of two banana peels and a handful of graham cracker crumbs. (Mentioning that I look only about 25 years old will earn you a bonus donut. ) Serious inquiries need not apply.

    Bah, I fit most of that, but a true MFP husband runs his eHarem non-exclusive even if he tells each girl it is exclusive. Gotta turn ya down.
  • Posts: 33,069 Member
    If you think I’m going to love you—you’re right. Clingy, over-emotional and socially draining woman, 41. Once you’ve got me, you can never ever leave me. Not ever! Prone to maniacal bursts of crying, usually followed by excitable and uncontrollable laughter. Life is a roller coaster; you’ve just got to hop on and ride it.
  • Posts: 33,711 Member
    edited May 2017
    Looking for mfp husband. Must be married in real life....single available men are not as appealing. Must be willing to make me feel special above all others, have the ability to make me smile, laugh and send me messages to not only brighten my day but also to prove you are thinking about me at least three times a day (preferably with meals). Telling me how beautiful you think I am is a must, especially on the days that I resemble Richard Simmons on a bender. Will receive payment of two banana peels and a handful of graham cracker crumbs. (Mentioning that I look only about 25 years old will earn you a bonus donut. ) Serious inquiries need not apply.

    All I read was banana.

    Edit: and donut.
  • Posts: 33,711 Member
    Vikka_V wrote: »
    What I want from you:
    - for you to do what I want, when I want, how I want...but if you do I won't really respect you
    - basically be "on call" for whatever I require/desire and then go away

    What you'll get from me:
    - I couldn't tell you...I'm guessing not much

    So a delivery boy?

    h9w9wt5s9sfw.jpg
  • Posts: 22,834 Member
    If you think I’m going to love you—you’re right. Clingy, over-emotional and socially draining woman, 41. Once you’ve got me, you can never ever leave me. Not ever!

    nintchdbpict000242868564.jpg


  • Posts: 33,069 Member
    Timshel_ wrote: »

    nintchdbpict000242868564.jpg


    I already bought my one way plane ticket....
  • Posts: 22,834 Member

    I already bought my one way plane ticket....

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  • Posts: 33,069 Member
    Timshel_ wrote: »

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  • Posts: 22,834 Member

    wuu3a2xs6qkw.jpg

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  • Posts: 22,834 Member
    I was checking you out, but.....wth?


    Stalker-1.gif
  • Posts: 33,069 Member
    Timshel_ wrote: »

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  • Posts: 2,677 Member
    if youre breathing and have 3 holes. im your guy

    :D You're a man of few words, I dig it.
  • Posts: 4,984 Member
    if youre breathing and have 3 holes. im your guy

    Straight and to the point. I like it.
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  • Posts: 483 Member
    if youre breathing and have 3 holes. im your guy

    I guess I qualify. I might not be mean enough though
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  • Posts: 147 Member
    I love sharks, but unfortunately i'm poor :D:D
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  • Posts: 9,563 Member
    Seeking a fun lady to hang out with who will share her husband/boyfriend with me

    What you'll get:
    - time off from your relationship
    - to watch us you choose
    - backup for whatever you may need

  • Posts: 3,419 Member

    Does one need to be awake?

    Totally optional
  • Posts: 1 Member
    This is both sad and humorous at the same time.
This discussion has been closed.