My bf cheated on me

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Replies

  • ButterIsGood
    ButterIsGood Posts: 198 Member
    The thing that bothers me the most is that he won't admit to what he did!
  • glassyo
    glassyo Posts: 6,449 Member
    glassyo wrote: »
    glassyo wrote: »
    glassyo wrote: »
    Guys my friend just told me more. Apparently a day before he broke up with me, he asked her to go out and try ethopian food with him and she agreed to go. He talked about me to her. Saying he wasnt happy. That he was gonna leave me but waiting until after Valentine's day but then about a day later, he texted her saying that he couldn't wait any longer and had broken up with me.

    I don't think you have a very good friend. Why would she agree to go to dinner with him and tell you after the fact. This all sound really suspect to me.

    Maybe she thought it was just as friends.

    Why does everything have to be suspect? (Asking for a friend of a friend :))

    I don't know, if my friend's man asked me to go to dinner I would:

    1) tell my friend (if it's supposed to be innocent then that won't be a problem)
    2) probably not go

    Yeah but they all knew each other at work so she could have thought it was innocent. And then it turned out not to be.

    As someone who was accused on here from people who didn't know me about having motives other than what I actually typed out, I feel the need to defend both the OP and her friend.

    Nope, not buying it. There's an unspoken code you just know, as a woman and as a friend. Even if it's innocent, I'm telling my friend. There is no harm in that. It's sneaky of him to ask her in the first place. Evidently he had ulterior motives.

    Yes, sneaky of HIM. But the friend told the OP not to tell him she talked to her. And, even if details are trickling out, the friend outright told the OP the guy hit on her.

    Well I would've told her he invited me to dinner before accepting. In fact I would've invited her. Throw a wrench in his plans.

    Well, I probably would have too! :) Or at least assumed she knew.
  • glassyo
    glassyo Posts: 6,449 Member
    The friend may not have done a thing to encourage his attempt...I had my best friend's husband try that with me years ago and trust me, I did nothing to encourage it. I couldn't stand him and never talked to him, hung out with him, nothing. He just randomly tried to start up one day while she was out of town. Some people are just rotten people. Oh, and they never admit to what they do! Be glad it was only 1 year in, no marriage and no kids when he revealed himself.

    Strong first post.

    (Not said sarcastically. I'm just happy someone agrees with me! :))
  • ButterIsGood
    ButterIsGood Posts: 198 Member
    denny_mac wrote: »
    The thing that bothers me the most is that he won't admit to what he did!

    Did you ever tell him exactly WHAT you learned that he did? Like your friend's name whom he allegedly asked out to dinner at an Ethiopian restaurant?

    Literally brought up everything that she said except using her name. And he just changes the subject. Starts making it about me and not about what he did to seal the deal. When he asked for a break, I thought he'd be over it in a week or so and then we could go back to our relationship. I never ever suspected he was out with my friend or was even going for it during this time. But when I found out about this, I can't ever take him back. With what he did, he sealed the deal.
  • slessofme
    slessofme Posts: 7,692 Member
    glassyo wrote: »
    glassyo wrote: »
    glassyo wrote: »
    Guys my friend just told me more. Apparently a day before he broke up with me, he asked her to go out and try ethopian food with him and she agreed to go. He talked about me to her. Saying he wasnt happy. That he was gonna leave me but waiting until after Valentine's day but then about a day later, he texted her saying that he couldn't wait any longer and had broken up with me.

    I don't think you have a very good friend. Why would she agree to go to dinner with him and tell you after the fact. This all sound really suspect to me.

    Maybe she thought it was just as friends.

    Why does everything have to be suspect? (Asking for a friend of a friend :))

    I don't know, if my friend's man asked me to go to dinner I would:

    1) tell my friend (if it's supposed to be innocent then that won't be a problem)
    2) probably not go

    Yeah but they all knew each other at work so she could have thought it was innocent. And then it turned out not to be.

    As someone who was accused on here from people who didn't know me about having motives other than what I actually typed out, I feel the need to defend both the OP and her friend.

    Nope, not buying it. There's an unspoken code you just know, as a woman and as a friend. Even if it's innocent, I'm telling my friend. There is no harm in that. It's sneaky of him to ask her in the first place. Evidently he had ulterior motives.

    Yes, sneaky of HIM. But the friend told the OP not to tell him she talked to her. And, even if details are trickling out, the friend outright told the OP the guy hit on her.

    Well I would've told her he invited me to dinner before accepting. In fact I would've invited her. Throw a wrench in his plans.

    Unless the friend accepted thinking maybe he wanted help planning something special. Did the OP say it was actually dinner? Maybe I assumed it was lunch because they work together. Which is significantly more innocent.

    Before I married him, my ex-husband and my BFF would talk on the phone every Thursday night while watching Friends at the same time (yeah, it was a while ago) while I was in a class. If they had chosen to watch in the same place I would not have been concerned at all. But... somebody better have helped him if he had come on to her the day after ending things with me. I wouldn't need to do anything, she would have put him in his place herself.

    I think most of us are, dare I say, older than the OP and her friend. I'm chalking some of the trickle truth and being nonconfrontational up to age/experience.
  • Chef_Barbell
    Chef_Barbell Posts: 6,377 Member
    denny_mac wrote: »
    The thing that bothers me the most is that he won't admit to what he did!

    Did you ever tell him exactly WHAT you learned that he did? Like your friend's name whom he allegedly asked out to dinner at an Ethiopian restaurant?

    Literally brought up everything that she said except using her name. And he just changes the subject. Starts making it about me and not about what he did to seal the deal. When he asked for a break, I thought he'd be over it in a week or so and then we could go back to our relationship. I never ever suspected he was out with my friend or was even going for it during this time. But when I found out about this, I can't ever take him back. With what he did, he sealed the deal.

    The longer you keep talking with him, the more he's gonna find a spin angle that works with you. This is why you need to delete and block and move on now. If you don't, by the end of the week he's gonna have you believing that you did something wrong and need to apologize to him and beg him to come back.

    Mark my words.

    100% this! Block and move on
  • Taz6o5
    Taz6o5 Posts: 3,441 Member
    The thing that bothers me the most is that he won't admit to what he did!

    I do that with farts.

    I always blame my dog. :flushed:
  • JeromeBarry1
    JeromeBarry1 Posts: 10,187 Member
    @ButterisGood You're young, smarter now. Carry on.
    Without him.
  • 3M_TA3
    3M_TA3 Posts: 1,033 Member
    3M_TA3 wrote: »
    What a freaking jerk. you can message me and I will be happy to help you out or you can cry in my lap if needed. anything for a friend. It is what MFP was created for.

    9f1thcyyyf79.gif

    This is so fabricated, it was NOT my nose that grew...
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,661 Member
    He hasn't texted me aince this morning. Ive already blocked him on insta, Facebook and snap chat. I'm just waiting to grab my stuff to block his number

    That a girl.. :)