Confession Time! ((ABSOLUTELY NO JUDGEMENT))
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This is a safe place, right?!
I feel like my friends resent me for losing weight when I am a lot smaller than they are. I am pals with a few of them on here, so when I have a success, like today, I feel like I'm rubbing it in their face, which is not my intention, but I also want to be able to share my victories too. It's a double edged sword for sure.
In addition to this, I feel like if they worked half as hard as I do, counting calories accurately, and doing some sort of exercise, they'd have successes too, but they don't want to put in the effort. I feel like a terrible friend for feeling that way, but it's true. I guess I'm not a great friend or good wife sometimes.
I totally get where you're coming from on this, and it's nice to know we're not alone. I feel like a part of me knows that I want them to do better because I want them to suceed, so the annoyance I have with myself when I screw up sort of carries over. I'm a real jerk to myself, so it's only natural, right?
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This is a safe place, right?!
I feel like my friends resent me for losing weight when I am a lot smaller than they are. I am pals with a few of them on here, so when I have a success, like today, I feel like I'm rubbing it in their face, which is not my intention, but I also want to be able to share my victories too. It's a double edged sword for sure.
In addition to this, I feel like if they worked half as hard as I do, counting calories accurately, and doing some sort of exercise, they'd have successes too, but they don't want to put in the effort. I feel like a terrible friend for feeling that way, but it's true. I guess I'm not a great friend or good wife sometimes.
My best friend was always much thinner than me (we have been friends for 17 years) I was always the fat one. She got breast cancer 7 years ago and since her treatments she has been on a steady gain, and when I started losing weight back in August she told me she needed to get busy because she was not going to be the fat one. I told her I would help her and she acted like she wanted the help at first, she bought a fitbit, and a treadmill and asked me several diet questions, but quickly gave up and was back to sedentary, old habits. I now weigh less than her and she resents me for it. She gets upset if I ever make a comment about how many calories are in something she offers me to eat, or I won't try something she is having. But I can't let it stop me from reaching my goals!0 -
This is a safe place, right?!
I feel like my friends resent me for losing weight when I am a lot smaller than they are. I am pals with a few of them on here, so when I have a success, like today, I feel like I'm rubbing it in their face, which is not my intention, but I also want to be able to share my victories too. It's a double edged sword for sure.
In addition to this, I feel like if they worked half as hard as I do, counting calories accurately, and doing some sort of exercise, they'd have successes too, but they don't want to put in the effort. I feel like a terrible friend for feeling that way, but it's true. I guess I'm not a great friend or good wife sometimes.
Why should YOU feel badly for the failings of others??? Yes, share and celebrate your successes! If anyone else, friend or not, feels negatively about it that is their problem, not yours. You are not a terrible friend, nor a terrible spouse. You take care of and celebrate YOU and everyone else needs to do the same for themselves.
It is hard to let yourself feel proud - I had a post several pages back talking about how I feel guilty when I do well and others maybe aren't doing so well at the same thing. I'm trying to overcome that. There's nothing wrong with doing well. I'm not running around shouting "I'm better than you!" (and I'm sure you aren't either ). If the other person has a problem with someone else's success then that is their problem and they need to take a look at themselves and see if they can/should be changing something they're doing.
I hope that makes sense, because I'm not always good at words.
(Hmm, I think I am making progress, thanks to this thread.)0 -
This is a safe place, right?!
I feel like my friends resent me for losing weight when I am a lot smaller than they are. I am pals with a few of them on here, so when I have a success, like today, I feel like I'm rubbing it in their face, which is not my intention, but I also want to be able to share my victories too. It's a double edged sword for sure.
In addition to this, I feel like if they worked half as hard as I do, counting calories accurately, and doing some sort of exercise, they'd have successes too, but they don't want to put in the effort. I feel like a terrible friend for feeling that way, but it's true. I guess I'm not a great friend or good wife sometimes.
I think this happens a lot. Personally, I get jealous when others I know are doing great on a diet but instead of festering over it, I use it as fuel to do better. But seriously, the laziness or lack of commitment by 'friends' is not your concern. Enjoy your accomplishments without exception!0 -
This is a safe place, right?!
I feel like my friends resent me for losing weight when I am a lot smaller than they are. I am pals with a few of them on here, so when I have a success, like today, I feel like I'm rubbing it in their face, which is not my intention, but I also want to be able to share my victories too. It's a double edged sword for sure.
In addition to this, I feel like if they worked half as hard as I do, counting calories accurately, and doing some sort of exercise, they'd have successes too, but they don't want to put in the effort. I feel like a terrible friend for feeling that way, but it's true. I guess I'm not a great friend or good wife sometimes.
Why should YOU feel badly for the failings of others??? Yes, share and celebrate your successes! If anyone else, friend or not, feels negatively about it that is their problem, not yours. You are not a terrible friend, nor a terrible spouse. You take care of and celebrate YOU and everyone else needs to do the same for themselves.
You are so wise! I just don't want to feel like I'm bragging or whatever. But you're right, I SHOULD be able to share and be proud of my hard work paying off. Which, I totally am because I've been literally working my butt off. Well, the flabby parts anyway.
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I took tablets that were not for human consumption to kick start my weight loss.. Nearly killed me!
don't do it, no matter how depressed you get. Positive support from people on here helped me to get a healthy mindset! Never felt better!! Thank you mfp peeps you probably saved my life! X
Whoo glad you are in a better mindset & feeling better & healthier. Good luck with the rest of the weight & if you do ever get in a funk just remember to take it one day at a time & you'll get to your goal in no time.0 -
Today's confession- I just ate the frosting off of two bite size cupcakes, I am calling it lunch
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Confession: I've gotten some really great questions for my One Thousand One Hundred and Elventieth Post.
So many in fact: I'll sneak preview my first name: Derek.0 -
This is a safe place, right?!
I feel like my friends resent me for losing weight when I am a lot smaller than they are. I am pals with a few of them on here, so when I have a success, like today, I feel like I'm rubbing it in their face, which is not my intention, but I also want to be able to share my victories too. It's a double edged sword for sure.
In addition to this, I feel like if they worked half as hard as I do, counting calories accurately, and doing some sort of exercise, they'd have successes too, but they don't want to put in the effort. I feel like a terrible friend for feeling that way, but it's true. I guess I'm not a great friend or good wife sometimes.
Why should YOU feel badly for the failings of others??? Yes, share and celebrate your successes! If anyone else, friend or not, feels negatively about it that is their problem, not yours. You are not a terrible friend, nor a terrible spouse. You take care of and celebrate YOU and everyone else needs to do the same for themselves.
It is hard to let yourself feel proud - I had a post several pages back talking about how I feel guilty when I do well and others maybe aren't doing so well at the same thing. I'm trying to overcome that. There's nothing wrong with doing well. I'm not running around shouting "I'm better than you!" (and I'm sure you aren't either ). If the other person has a problem with someone else's success then that is their problem and they need to take a look at themselves and see if they can/should be changing something they're doing.
I hope that makes sense, because I'm not always good at words.
(Hmm, I think I am making progress, thanks to this thread.)This is a safe place, right?!
I feel like my friends resent me for losing weight when I am a lot smaller than they are. I am pals with a few of them on here, so when I have a success, like today, I feel like I'm rubbing it in their face, which is not my intention, but I also want to be able to share my victories too. It's a double edged sword for sure.
In addition to this, I feel like if they worked half as hard as I do, counting calories accurately, and doing some sort of exercise, they'd have successes too, but they don't want to put in the effort. I feel like a terrible friend for feeling that way, but it's true. I guess I'm not a great friend or good wife sometimes.
I think this happens a lot. Personally, I get jealous when others I know are doing great on a diet but instead of festering over it, I use it as fuel to do better. But seriously, the laziness or lack of commitment by 'friends' is not your concern. Enjoy your accomplishments without exception!
Thanks, guys. I may celebrate my loss with a trip to Starbucks today and eating my weight in chips and salsa tonight.
I truly love this thread.
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kellienw335 wrote: »kellienw335 wrote: »kellienw335 wrote: »Confession: My husband is not as serious about his health as he should be, and that scares me. A lot.
I feel your pain! My husband won't even go for a walk with me on the weekends. I let him hold me back for a long time because he wouldn't workout so I didn't either. He works from home and gets zero exercise. In the past I've tried yelling, guilt, compassion, empathy; nothing works.
I mean that's just terrible.... I am curious what his defense is when you sincerely tell him you are genuinely worried about his long term health?
He says he'll workout and then doesn't. The conversation has been going on for over six years. The thing is, his dad died in his early 60s because of complications from diabetes and not taking care of himself. He had one leg amputated above the knee and then his other foot was amputated a couple years before he died. My husband at this point does not have diabetes, but I feel like it's inevitable. We have a 7 year old and a 2 year old and not only is he setting a terrible example, but sometimes I feel like he doesn't care if he'll be there when they get older.
Sorry for the rant.
No apologies... it IS concerning. I totally get it... Especially when there are kids involved. No disrespect to the spouse, of course... my daughter was the reason I made the change.
If he isn't 'truly' willing to do anything about it then you have to ask yourself is the problem ultimately a dealbreaker? Tough question, I know.
You're right regarding it being very concerning. Deal breaker? No way! He is my best friend, a great man, a wonderful husband, and a terrific dad. I was just venting.kellienw335 wrote: »kellienw335 wrote: »kellienw335 wrote: »Confession: My husband is not as serious about his health as he should be, and that scares me. A lot.
I feel your pain! My husband won't even go for a walk with me on the weekends. I let him hold me back for a long time because he wouldn't workout so I didn't either. He works from home and gets zero exercise. In the past I've tried yelling, guilt, compassion, empathy; nothing works.
I mean that's just terrible.... I am curious what his defense is when you sincerely tell him you are genuinely worried about his long term health?
He says he'll workout and then doesn't. The conversation has been going on for over six years. The thing is, his dad died in his early 60s because of complications from diabetes and not taking care of himself. He had one leg amputated above the knee and then his other foot was amputated a couple years before he died. My husband at this point does not have diabetes, but I feel like it's inevitable. We have a 7 year old and a 2 year old and not only is he setting a terrible example, but sometimes I feel like he doesn't care if he'll be there when they get older.
Sorry for the rant.
No apologies... it IS concerning. I totally get it... Especially when there are kids involved. No disrespect to the spouse, of course... my daughter was the reason I made the change.
If he isn't 'truly' willing to do anything about it then you have to ask yourself is the problem ultimately a dealbreaker? Tough question, I know.
You're right regarding it being very concerning. Deal breaker? No way! He is my best friend, a great man, a wonderful husband, and a terrific dad. I was just venting.
Well good. In that case I would do everything you can to steer him in the best direction. If ya can't get him to do anything active, attack the problem from the other end. Grocery shopping! lol
Personally I am great at not buying bad foods, even on am empty stomach, but if it enters the house (usually by way of grandma!) then I am pretty much powerless against it... calling me to come devour it and be appropriately guilty afterwards. Haha0 -
pofoster21 wrote: »So I guess I should go on an m&m diet. Lost nearly 4lbs between yesterday and today. Guess I'll save the plastic suit I made last night for another day.
You better patent that diet! I can see it being as big as the Twinkie diet. Which M&Ms were you eating?I had a massive cookie for breakfast. Yum.
Can't go wrong with that! I used to eat ice cream for breakfast during my weight loss (I haven't done it for awhile) & coworkers still laugh about it to this day.
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AgentOrangeJuice wrote: »Confession: I've gotten some really great questions for my One Thousand One Hundred and Elventieth Post.
So many in fact: I'll sneak preview my first name: Derek.
I somehow already knew this. Why is that?
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I think I may be subbing in shopping for boredom eating as a bad habit. Since I've started monitoring my eating more, I find myself mindlessly browsing Amazon a lot more often. When I go for walks, it's often to shops. I am trying to make my new habit exercise or at least something else positive, but it takes time I guess.0
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AgentOrangeJuice wrote: »Confession: I've gotten some really great questions for my One Thousand One Hundred and Elventieth Post.
So many in fact: I'll sneak preview my first name: Derek.
I somehow already knew this. Why is that?
First names thread? I usually introduce myself when I send Friend Requests as well.
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Confession... I am pretty sure I've single-handedly funded the nations cutie/halo orange market for the past several years. I go through a 5lb bag in like 3 days.
I am just now, at this very moment, having my first cutie ever. I now realize why my daughter eats them 2-3 at a time. They are little round balls of heavenly sweetness. I will be buying some at the store this evening.
Why yes, yes they are. I've had 3 this morning with 3 to go.
them so much.
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This is a safe place, right?!
I feel like my friends resent me for losing weight when I am a lot smaller than they are. I am pals with a few of them on here, so when I have a success, like today, I feel like I'm rubbing it in their face, which is not my intention, but I also want to be able to share my victories too. It's a double edged sword for sure.
In addition to this, I feel like if they worked half as hard as I do, counting calories accurately, and doing some sort of exercise, they'd have successes too, but they don't want to put in the effort. I feel like a terrible friend for feeling that way, but it's true. I guess I'm not a great friend or good wife sometimes.
Why should YOU feel badly for the failings of others??? Yes, share and celebrate your successes! If anyone else, friend or not, feels negatively about it that is their problem, not yours. You are not a terrible friend, nor a terrible spouse. You take care of and celebrate YOU and everyone else needs to do the same for themselves.
It is hard to let yourself feel proud - I had a post several pages back talking about how I feel guilty when I do well and others maybe aren't doing so well at the same thing. I'm trying to overcome that. There's nothing wrong with doing well. I'm not running around shouting "I'm better than you!" (and I'm sure you aren't either ). If the other person has a problem with someone else's success then that is their problem and they need to take a look at themselves and see if they can/should be changing something they're doing.
I hope that makes sense, because I'm not always good at words.
(Hmm, I think I am making progress, thanks to this thread.)
Yes, that makes sense and I know it's not easy for everyone. Glad to hear you are making progress, though - that is great!
It took me a long time to learn to take a compliment. I would always deflect, or say something silly or derogatory about myself. Then I decided I'd had enough of that. For me, the best thing to do is remember to say a sincere "Thank you!" ONLY. And then stop talking. If I keep talking I say something I don't want to. Takes practice. It's also nice when you can return a compliment to the giver.0 -
AgentOrangeJuice wrote: »AgentOrangeJuice wrote: »Confession: I've gotten some really great questions for my One Thousand One Hundred and Elventieth Post.
So many in fact: I'll sneak preview my first name: Derek.
I somehow already knew this. Why is that?
First names thread?
Nope, I feel like you've hinted at this before in here. Mostly because this is the only thread I frequent. This, and the Things that make you irrationally angry. I haven't been over there for a while though. @quiksylver296 how is it going in there?
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Confession: I've recently developed a rather disordered way of viewing food. I've reached my goal weight (and am now underweight) and now I'm terrified of eating too much even though I knows I need to do so to fuel all my running.
Friends and family are very concerned and scared. I'm trying to eat more this week but today thoughts of going on a cut are popping into my head.
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