Confession Time! ((ABSOLUTELY NO JUDGEMENT))
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Italian_Buju wrote: »Susieq_1994 wrote: »
I do not mind mint chocolate (although I have to be in the mood for it), but I LOVE peanut butter and chocolate, in all forms! Kit Kat Chunky peanut butter is amazing! My biggest weakness is Haagan Dazs Chocolate Peanut Butter Ice Cream.....I can NEVER eat that in proper portions lol. I have also been known to bake chocolate brownies with cut up pieces of snickers peanut butter in them.....
Kit Kat Chunky peanut butter? Sounds amazing!! I don't think we get them here, though that's probably a good thing... 0 -
smashley_mashley wrote: »lilaclovebird wrote: »
Parenting is so hard, I am taking every effort to never have to do it.
And think about it, parenting with TWO parents is hard... and single parents...woah. AND if everyone is working?!
Everyone else can go ahead and make successful and wonderful humans. I do not feel strong enough to partake in that endeavor.
ETA: I am serious about everything in this post. I see parenting as very difficult. It takes skills and abilities that I am pretty sure I do not possess.
Here's something I've never confessed IRL before...
I don't enjoy parenting. I don't think I was meant to be a mum.
Don't get me wrong, I love my boys with all my heart. I give all of myself to them to ensure they feel loved, are happy and healthy.
But I just don't think I was cut out for it. I've had pretty severe postnatal depression since my first was born 3 years ago and I'm sure that contributes, but I do wonder if its just my personality. Also, I carry a lot of guilt over my depression, its so unfair to them and I worry I'm messing up their whole lives
Aaaaaaaand now I want to cover my feelings in food.
Awe, I'm sorry you feel that way. That is quite the confession. *hugs*
I confess that I don't know if I want to be a mother. When I was younger, I always wanted a big family - 4 kids or so. Now that I am 29 and the more I get established in my career and see the fruits of my job (mostly putting money into savings) I don't know if I want the responsibility. There are parts of being a mom that I really want, such as doing crafts, going to kid movies, Halloween/Christmas/Easter - the fun stuff. But I don't know if I can handle all the other stuff, such as getting up in the middle of the night for feedings, changing diapers, dealing with sick/vomity kids, bratty meltdowns in stores, being annoyed when I just want me time.
I feel selfish because I just want the fun stuff but not the whole package.
Not selfish at all! Good for you for thinking about it ahead of time. Why not be a mentor? Be a "Big Sister". There are SO many children out there in need of just what you want to provide! That would be awesome of you.0 -
lilaclovebird wrote: »
Parenting is so hard, I am taking every effort to never have to do it.
And think about it, parenting with TWO parents is hard... and single parents...woah. AND if everyone is working?!
Everyone else can go ahead and make successful and wonderful humans. I do not feel strong enough to partake in that endeavor.
ETA: I am serious about everything in this post. I see parenting as very difficult. It takes skills and abilities that I am pretty sure I do not possess.
Here's something I've never confessed IRL before...
I don't enjoy parenting. I don't think I was meant to be a mum.
Don't get me wrong, I love my boys with all my heart. I give all of myself to them to ensure they feel loved, are happy and healthy.
But I just don't think I was cut out for it. I've had pretty severe postnatal depression since my first was born 3 years ago and I'm sure that contributes, but I do wonder if its just my personality. Also, I carry a lot of guilt over my depression, its so unfair to them and I worry I'm messing up their whole lives
Aaaaaaaand now I want to cover my feelings in food.
I have 4 tho I don't suffer from on depression it's hard! Add me and we can chat!!
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lilaclovebird wrote: »
Parenting is so hard, I am taking every effort to never have to do it.
And think about it, parenting with TWO parents is hard... and single parents...woah. AND if everyone is working?!
Everyone else can go ahead and make successful and wonderful humans. I do not feel strong enough to partake in that endeavor.
ETA: I am serious about everything in this post. I see parenting as very difficult. It takes skills and abilities that I am pretty sure I do not possess.
Here's something I've never confessed IRL before...
I don't enjoy parenting. I don't think I was meant to be a mum.
Don't get me wrong, I love my boys with all my heart. I give all of myself to them to ensure they feel loved, are happy and healthy.
But I just don't think I was cut out for it. I've had pretty severe postnatal depression since my first was born 3 years ago and I'm sure that contributes, but I do wonder if its just my personality. Also, I carry a lot of guilt over my depression, its so unfair to them and I worry I'm messing up their whole lives
Aaaaaaaand now I want to cover my feelings in food.
Same here. Sometimes I read how people feel about their kids but it seems I'm always so busy playing referral or cooking or packing lunches or doing laundry or cleaning their mess and trying not to go crazy that I don't really get to enjoy it. Or how new parents love their babies so much while I was just so exhausted from having 2 at once that I just wanted some time alone!
Oh and people who are so sad when Summer break is over. Are you kidding me? I want to celebrate. Tears of joy the first day of school. Seriously.
Then I see all those couples still so much in love after 10 years and it's definitely not me either so I'm thinking it's a problem with me. But to be fair, I don't like little kids. They're gross and messy and loud. LOL. When I envisioned being a parent, I was more looking forward to the teen/tween age, when we start to be able to enjoy more 'adult' things together - walks, hiking, day trips, sightseeing, more interesting movies etc (and I know that's going to bite me in the *** later because I know that that age is no walk in the park either). Doing crafts and kids games and family movies etc... really not my thing (ok, I like Disney... to an extent).
Ok Christmas and Easter are fun the first 30 minutes, then it's more mess, wrapping paper and packaging and toys everywhere.... lol. I mean, we do have some great days, but pretty much everything comes accompanied by 'I'm hungry', 'my feet hurt', 'I'm bored', 'I want to go home', 'waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa'. Facebook perfect family pictures? Hardly what it's really like. Although I guess that it depends on your kids. I have a happy one, and I have a whiner. Let's say that on the rare occasions that the whiner was busy at a party or something and we had the happy one, it was much more enjoyable.
I confess that sometimes I daydream about going away ALONE for a week.0 -
I'm 24 and I've never wanted kids. Too much responsibility and expensive.0
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berlynnwall wrote: »lilaclovebird wrote: »
Parenting is so hard, I am taking every effort to never have to do it.
And think about it, parenting with TWO parents is hard... and single parents...woah. AND if everyone is working?!
Everyone else can go ahead and make successful and wonderful humans. I do not feel strong enough to partake in that endeavor.
ETA: I am serious about everything in this post. I see parenting as very difficult. It takes skills and abilities that I am pretty sure I do not possess.
Here's something I've never confessed IRL before...
I don't enjoy parenting. I don't think I was meant to be a mum.
Don't get me wrong, I love my boys with all my heart. I give all of myself to them to ensure they feel loved, are happy and healthy.
But I just don't think I was cut out for it. I've had pretty severe postnatal depression since my first was born 3 years ago and I'm sure that contributes, but I do wonder if its just my personality. Also, I carry a lot of guilt over my depression, its so unfair to them and I worry I'm messing up their whole lives
Aaaaaaaand now I want to cover my feelings in food.
I think more people than you realize feel this way at least sometimes, but it's so hard to find someone to talk to about it because people act like you are the devil incarnate if you even suggest that parenting isn't fun all day every day, let alone admit that you don't really like it.
What I want to say to you is this: If you have two (or more?) kids 3 and under, you are at one of the hardest parts and it is totally understandable to not enjoy every minute of it. It sounds like despite your feelings, you are doing your best and that is all you can do. Don't be afraid to reach out and get a bit of help with your depression, whether from a doctor or a therapist. It can make a world of difference. I don't know you, but I can almost guarentee that you are not messing up their whole lives. They will barely if at all remember this time period. Take care of yourself.
Thanks berlynnwall, you're very kind
Its all very intense and all consuming, Mr 10 months still nurses heaps overnight so I'm betting chronic sleep deprivation doesn't help
It is hard to be honest with people because yes, you are seen as the devil incarnate by some lol
It felt good to get that off my chest though! And now to snuggle in our family bed and appreciate how even though I get no personal space, they are nice and warm on this chilly night!
Sleep deprivation never helps. I know from experience that this time feels like it will never end, but it does. It so does. Is there any way you could get more breaks? I know your kids are little, but taking even a few hours to yourself once a week can really be a life saver, even if you just use them to take a nap.0 -
I confess if you are a walker/jogger/cyclist (yes, even cyclists....) that talks on your phone WITHOUT a Bluetooth or even a wired headset, chances are I want to slap the phone out of your hand for how ridiculous you look holding that device up to your head during a 'workout'. Don't have a Bluetooth or you're technology challenged? Fine. Most phones come with a headset right out of the box. Plug it in and USE IT. Better yet.... save the poor soul on the other end from your non-stop drivel in labored form (oh how pleasant that heavy breathing must sound) and call them afterwards.
Unless it's an emergency I refuse to be on the receiving end of those calls. If I can tell someone is doing something else or is preoccupied, I tell them to call me back later, then hang up. Doesn't happen often because very few people call me and the ones who do know how I am about that. But, as in your example, I often wonder who would put up with that?
LOL... good question. I know I wouldn't nor would I subject someone else to such torture.
It wasn't more than a week ago while cycling home I saw a lady riding her bike.... up a somewhat steep hill.... with head cocked to the side and her cell phone literally pinned between her shoulder and ear so she could pedal up the hill and still keep both hands on the handlebars..... pardon me but WTH... did I just SEE that ?!?!
What did 5 fingers say to the face? *SLAP*
How does that not KILL your neck?! I have a shoulder rest on my work phone and with my cell phone I never hold it up to my ear with my shoulder. Granted I have 3 vertebrae in my neck turned the wrong way and I get monthly massages to deal with the kinks in my neck and the chain reaction in my shoulders and back, but I can't imagine working out (attempting to do something good for your body) and then damaging your neck at the same time. I suppose some phone calls just can't wait.
Some people talk for the simple sake of hearing their own mouth run. LMAO >_<
Yes, yes they do. Unfortunately the people I know that do this are clients so I have to just continue to smile and nod until they are done. Family or friends? Nope. I'll interject or excuse myself. Cannot waste time listening to someone yammering on just for the sake of hearing their own voice.
That reminds me of a family member. You have to set aside a block of time to take a phone call from her. She will literally talk to you for 4+ hours if you don't manufacture some excuse to get off the phone. I stick to email. I write her one 4 sentence email, she sends me back 7 pages, but at least I can answer in my own time.0 -
lilaclovebird wrote: »
Parenting is so hard, I am taking every effort to never have to do it.
And think about it, parenting with TWO parents is hard... and single parents...woah. AND if everyone is working?!
Everyone else can go ahead and make successful and wonderful humans. I do not feel strong enough to partake in that endeavor.
ETA: I am serious about everything in this post. I see parenting as very difficult. It takes skills and abilities that I am pretty sure I do not possess.
Here's something I've never confessed IRL before...
I don't enjoy parenting. I don't think I was meant to be a mum.
Don't get me wrong, I love my boys with all my heart. I give all of myself to them to ensure they feel loved, are happy and healthy.
But I just don't think I was cut out for it. I've had pretty severe postnatal depression since my first was born 3 years ago and I'm sure that contributes, but I do wonder if its just my personality. Also, I carry a lot of guilt over my depression, its so unfair to them and I worry I'm messing up their whole lives
Aaaaaaaand now I want to cover my feelings in food.
Same here. Sometimes I read how people feel about their kids but it seems I'm always so busy playing referral or cooking or packing lunches or doing laundry or cleaning their mess and trying not to go crazy that I don't really get to enjoy it. Or how new parents love their babies so much while I was just so exhausted from having 2 at once that I just wanted some time alone!
Oh and people who are so sad when Summer break is over. Are you kidding me? I want to celebrate. Tears of joy the first day of school. Seriously.
Then I see all those couples still so much in love after 10 years and it's definitely not me either so I'm thinking it's a problem with me. But to be fair, I don't like little kids. They're gross and messy and loud. LOL. When I envisioned being a parent, I was more looking forward to the teen/tween age, when we start to be able to enjoy more 'adult' things together - walks, hiking, day trips, sightseeing, more interesting movies etc (and I know that's going to bite me in the *** later because I know that that age is no walk in the park either). Doing crafts and kids games and family movies etc... really not my thing (ok, I like Disney... to an extent).
Ok Christmas and Easter are fun the first 30 minutes, then it's more mess, wrapping paper and packaging and toys everywhere.... lol. I mean, we do have some great days, but pretty much everything comes accompanied by 'I'm hungry', 'my feet hurt', 'I'm bored', 'I want to go home', 'waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa'. Facebook perfect family pictures? Hardly what it's really like. Although I guess that it depends on your kids. I have a happy one, and I have a whiner. Let's say that on the rare occasions that the whiner was busy at a party or something and we had the happy one, it was much more enjoyable.
I confess that sometimes I daydream about going away ALONE for a week.
Those people. Ugh. I am like making a countdown chart by the beginning of August.
You should totally go away for a week. You sound burnt out, and if it's a possibility for you you should get the heck out of there. You'll all benefit from you getting a break.0 -
Samesies. To both. Once I started eating a Chunky Kitkat the same way, kept nibbling and found it WAS CHOCOLATE ALL THE WAY THROUGH. My day was made.kellyjellybellyjelly wrote: »I'm going to fess up before catching up today.
Yesterday I ate everything.
Reeses Pieces, Cadbury's Picnic bar, Jaffa Cakes, and a cookie. I also didn't go to the gym or go for a run after work. Then I thought it would be a great idea to weigh myself this morning and I'm back up to 214lbs. So I went for a swim this morning and finished 5 minutes early. I feel really tired, and I think my 'go to' is sugar. I feel like having a nap at my desk right now and its only 9.50am.
You can't go wrong with sweets:D. What does a Jaffa cake taste like?
Hopefully your work day will go flying by.
Ha ha Uh, I can't really describe it. I disassemble them anyway, chocolate edge first and then take the jelly off, eat the cakey bit and the orange jelly last. I don't play with my food normally but it seems to be a habit with Jaffa Cakes. Its a bit like eating the chocolate edge off a Kit-Kat first.
I absolutely hate that America hasn't discovered chunky kit kats...I will be bringing loads home after my visit to the UK woo hoo!
Had to google those. Oh gosh. I want one now.
Confession - it's definitely one of those days. Ended up having lunch at 11am. 340 calories left for the day. Fail.
Aren't the kit kat chunky the same exact thing as the big kats?
I'll have to check them out but I didn't think so. Now I'll have to go buy one of those and taste test is against a chunky kit kat!0 -
Yesterday was the lowest low I have hit in what feels like years, I just felt so alone and had a full on emotional breakdown over laundry that my SO didn't put away right when I asked him to. I ate my feelings and don't even want to try and estimate the damage I did. But! Today is another day and I feel a lot better, I've been chugging water and ginger tea to combat with the bloat.
My confession: when I finally crawl out of the rabbit hole that I fell into, I'm terrified. I push away everyone that loves me and can't give them a real reason for why. Bleh! Life is hard guys.0 -
Susieq_1994 wrote: »
*drool* I once had the idea to bake brownies by doing the following:
A. Spread half the brownie batter in the pan
B. Cover the batter with a single layer of these beauties
C. Spread the other half of the batter on top
D. Layer them across the top
Sadly, when I went to put my idea into action, I couldn't find them at ANY of the supermarkets. Ugh.
OH MY GOD! You had me, I really want to know what happens. You must do it! I think they are mostly around at Christmas time.
......
I'm doing it. I'm going to hunt them down now and I'm going to do it...
Do it, do it! I NEED to know how this turns out. I should hunt for them too.... 0 -
I confess if you are a walker/jogger/cyclist (yes, even cyclists....) that talks on your phone WITHOUT a Bluetooth or even a wired headset, chances are I want to slap the phone out of your hand for how ridiculous you look holding that device up to your head during a 'workout'. Don't have a Bluetooth or you're technology challenged? Fine. Most phones come with a headset right out of the box. Plug it in and USE IT. Better yet.... save the poor soul on the other end from your non-stop drivel in labored form (oh how pleasant that heavy breathing must sound) and call them afterwards.
Unless it's an emergency I refuse to be on the receiving end of those calls. If I can tell someone is doing something else or is preoccupied, I tell them to call me back later, then hang up. Doesn't happen often because very few people call me and the ones who do know how I am about that. But, as in your example, I often wonder who would put up with that?
I may or may not dial into conference calls whilst multi-tasking from time to time. LOL
It's always calls that I need to hear but won't have to do much talking, and I leave myself on mute. Other than that, the only call I may take while I'm running is either one of my kids (if they were to call me, I'd know it was important) or answering to say I'll call you back when I'm done.0 -
nicsflyingcircus wrote: »xMrBunglex wrote: »I have been reading this and i feel sad for you People, i know what it is like to count calories and binge eat and how it feels later. But going on a low carb diet made it all go away. No more longing for "something good" and no more going to five different stores to find the right kind of ice cream. I just dont want these anymore and i am happy with eating low carb food. And my health has never been better
I quite enjoyed this while eating my whole-wheat crust pizza and will read it again while eating my fat free Dreyers yogurt blend ice cream.
And post a loss at tomorrow's weigh in.
I ate a mess of bacon, eggs fried in butter, multiple coffees with HWC and beef brisket yesterday. I showed a 2lb loss this morning. Shocking!
Your post is every bit as passive-agressively douchey as the one you quoted
Yes, that was judgmental.
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MissLaaber wrote: »Yesterday was the lowest low I have hit in what feels like years, I just felt so alone and had a full on emotional breakdown over laundry that my SO didn't put away right when I asked him to. I ate my feelings and don't even want to try and estimate the damage I did. But! Today is another day and I feel a lot better, I've been chugging water and ginger tea to combat with the bloat.
My confession: when I finally crawl out of the rabbit hole that I fell into, I'm terrified. I push away everyone that loves me and can't give them a real reason for why. Bleh! Life is hard guys.
Isn't that the truth- preach!
ETA: I'm glad you're feeling better today It is a new day! 0 -
orangesmartie wrote: »I have 477 posts to catch up on.
But just to say: I climbed a mountain on Sunday. Felt awesome. Didn't struggle. Photos on my just giving page soon (address on profile)
I'm still catching up too, but good for you!!!0 -
When I started MFP about 4 years ago, I weighed 220lbs. When I started really using it again about 2 months ago, I was 250lb. I have lost 22lbs in 2 months, but MFP still showed 0lbs lost because it goes by the weight you started. So, I edited my initial entry to 250lbs. This made me feel a lot better. I felt like the website was trying to shame me for being heavier than when I started, instead of giving me kudos for the 20+lbs I have lost in 2 months!0
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Italian_Buju wrote: »Susieq_1994 wrote: »
I do not mind mint chocolate (although I have to be in the mood for it), but I LOVE peanut butter and chocolate, in all forms! Kit Kat Chunky peanut butter is amazing! My biggest weakness is Haagan Dazs Chocolate Peanut Butter Ice Cream.....I can NEVER eat that in proper portions lol. I have also been known to bake chocolate brownies with cut up pieces of snickers peanut butter in them..... Kit Kat Chunky peanut butter? Sounds amazing!! I don't think we get them here, though that's probably a good thing...
They ARE amazing. I've had one twice... One of the major supermarket chains in Saudi Arabia imported it as a limited edition thing from either the U.S. or the UK. It was SO GOOD. And I sent my sister a picture of it to make her jealous, because she lives in Oman and can't have any. Also, she loves chocolate/peanut butter combinations even more than I do.
So... I guess my confession right now is that I'm an evil sister?0 -
I have always wanted to be a mother, but I do sometimes look at it as being something I wouldn't be good at. I like little kids alright... though I don't like certain things they do (their loudness, for example). I was a terrible kid. Name something, I probably did it. I stopped the monorail in Disney World by screaming and trying to get in the way of the closing doors. My mom swears I almost gave my grandma a heart attack. I don't want my kids to end up like me!!! I have pretty bad anxiety and I know I would probably be feeling that increase tenfold if my kid had a breakdown in a grocery store.
But one thing I look forward to about being a mother (though I don't think I'll have kids for many years) is being able to have a sort of undying love that I hear all these mothers talking about on Facebook. And I know that, while my relationship with my own mom has had its rough spots, we love eachother and that's never going to change. She's also my best friend and really fun and I feel I can talk to her about almost anything. That's what I want with my own kids!0 -
My apple was quite the disappointment. It was crisp and juicy in some spots and mealy and gross in most others. I've had disappointment eating fresh fruit the last 2 days. Why is it SO HARD FOR ME TO PICK GOOD FRUIT?! 0
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Italian_Buju wrote: »Susieq_1994 wrote: »
I do not mind mint chocolate (although I have to be in the mood for it), but I LOVE peanut butter and chocolate, in all forms! Kit Kat Chunky peanut butter is amazing! My biggest weakness is Haagan Dazs Chocolate Peanut Butter Ice Cream.....I can NEVER eat that in proper portions lol. I have also been known to bake chocolate brownies with cut up pieces of snickers peanut butter in them.....
I do too! Chocolate peanut butter anything is magical. I'm one of those people that puts peanut butter on a spoon and then dips it in a bag of chocolate chips.... Or I make a peanut butter sandwich and sprinkle chocolate chips on top and then microwave it. Magically delicious!
Also, chocolate peanut butter oatmeal is my favorite breakfast ever. I have it EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. It somehow keeps me magically on track because I feel like I've had dessert for breakfast...0
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