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Confession Time! ((ABSOLUTELY NO JUDGEMENT))
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Well at 5'4" and 118 pounds you probably look awesome, lol.
I'm 5'5" and typically between 133 and 135 pounds. I do have a large frame though (30 inch waist, without really that much fat left there), but still. Still wish I could get below 133 pounds without feeling like I'm starving all the time.
I'm very small-framed (bra band is a 28, so very narrow ribcage, small wrists, the whole bit) so that's why I like to stay there. Honestly, I think I'd look better with another few pounds off but when I try to maintain any lower I feel like I'm starving all the time too, so I get it.
MFP would certainly tell me to lift heavy, try a small bulk, etc to avoid all that and look tighter, but I just can't bring myself to care enough to bother, as I also loathe strength training in every way, shape, and form (and I've tried free weights at home and at the gym, alone and with my husband and with a trainer, classes, machines, bodyweight, DVDs, every way that it's possible, I think.) I'm good with my wimpy runs, downhill skiing, and an hour of walking every day. Sorrynotsorry.0 -
52cardpickup wrote: »
I agree with all of this. I feel like there's a lot of pressure from a lot of people to jump on the weight lifting bandwagon for aesthetic reasons, and a lot of people throw out "LIFT HEAVY" as the be all and end all of exercise without considering other people's interest/disinterest/goals/physical limitations/aspirations/time/what have you.
This morning there was a thread started by a person who was depressed because they weighed in at 501 pounds, and one of the first suggestions was that they start squatting and deadlifting. Seriously? SMDH. I get the feeling that people don't read the original post, they just respond with an automatic blurb.
On the other hand, weight lifting (OR resistance training, and THAT IS THE KEY!) is great for reasons aside from aesthetics... it strengthens bones and bone density, aids in living independently into old age, etc. It doesn't mean that you have to squat 300 lbs and bench press 1000, or look like Arnold, or stand in front of the mirror kissing your muscles and taking selfies. I just believe that an exercise routine should be balanced like an "eating routine" (don'twanttosaydiet) should be balanced.
sorry if this came across as judge-y *hangs head in shame and slinks off*
Nope. There was a thread in /r/fitness yesterday, a newbie asking why the veins on their hand were popping out after they lift and does it go away. A lot of the responses were treating them like an idiot and insisting that should be their goal. Maybe if they're 16 year old boys or doing shows? I don't think the average 10k runner is looking to see how long they can pop veins.
I've had a few people get an attitude with me when I've told them I have no interest in lifting. That doesn't mean I don't care about strength training, but when the doctor has told me no SL 5x5, I really don't care about the finer details of min/maxing a deadlift PR. I'm too busy cursing at Chuck Norris from my Total Gym.0 -
(Edited because I forgot a few words...and to fix the quote.)
When I was preg with my son and we found out he'd have special needs I was told by several well-meaning people. "Well of all the people to have a special needs child I'm glad it is you." (I knew they meant they thought I could handle it and could educate myself on the needs and resources and so on - including having the patience to deal with it...) but really... what a thing to say!!! I adore my son. He is a very unique boy and with that come many "normal" things that he will "never" do and that is ok. I would not change him and work hard to maximize his unique potential. This poem helped me a lot when I first learned the diagnosis while pregnant.
WELCOME TO HOLLAND
by
Emily Perl Kingsley.
c1987 by Emily Perl Kingsley. All rights reserved
I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this......
When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.
After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."
"Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."
But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.
The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.
So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.
It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around.... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills....and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.
But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy... and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."
And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away... because the loss of that dream is a very very significant loss.
But... if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ... about Holland.
I love this! Thank you for sharing!0 -
riderfangal wrote: »
I work in an office so most of the steps are taken outside work hours..walking every night, doing the stairs at home even walking laps in my backyard
Do you log those walks as workouts? From my understanding, if you log those walks, you don't want to change your activity level, but if you aren't counting those things as planned workouts, then you should change your activity level.
I haven't logged for years, but to use myself as an example, I work in an office - super sedentary, but I walk to work (3 miles round-trip) and walk my dog and hit around 12K steps a day. No way am I going to log that walking, so I would set myself to active and then only log things that were above and beyond my typical walking - so a fitness class or a 3 mile run or something. I think this is where the TDEE method - vs eating exercise calories camps get involved0 -
Susieq_1994 wrote: »
I seriously can't believe it either, but I'll bring my confession to the game as well. I feel quite bad about some of the slightly judgmental posts from parents (towards their kids) about bedwetting issues. I had the same issue, and it didn't go away until I was FIFTEEN. Yes, I said FIF. TEEN. It was embarrassing and horrible for me, and thinking that my parents would have been ashamed or upset about it or talked about it like the ones who mentioned it above makes me even more embarrassed. Nobody wets their bed on purpose. :-/
awww yea.I shared because I felt like it would show that it's not something that is horrible, I mean, I'm glad I don't have that problem now.. lol But I don't think my parents were angry at me for it. Like you said, nobody does it on purpose (that I know of.. lol). It is something you have to grow out of, some of us just take a little longer. I might have done it longer if I hadn't started medication, but maybe it was about to stop anyway. If I had a kid I would certainly be understanding if they came to me and told me they wet the bed, I would just change the sheets and wash them and that would be it.
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I once pulled a box of discarded donuts out of the garbage at work and ate them. I did not want them to go to waste. Please tell me someone else has done that, even once.....0
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Serious question here: What if you don't want that? I'm 47 - the only people who see me naked is my husband and my dog (she judges me - she recently lost 15% of her bodyweight and is smug about it). I live in a climate where I'm covered up a lot of the time. All I really want is to look ok in my clothes. I feel like MFP is often all about lifting weights, and I'm just not interested in doing that.
I life weights for bone health. I'm pretty clumsy, so I know I'll fall a bit when I'm older (totally ate it running the other day, and can't blame it on anything other than falling over my own feet) so I lift weights as bone-breaking insurance for when I'm old and frail. More muscle can also increase your calorie needs too, so people who want to eat more can benefit by having more muscle. But really, I would say if you don't want to, and are happy with how you look, just do what you will do consistently.0 -
I'm proud to be a Mum to my special needs daughter. She is the most wonderful gift I could ever have in my life.....I get good days with her & I get bad days.....tell me what parent doesn't.
She is 26 years old & still lives at home & I treasure every single moment I have with her both the good & the bad & I thank the universe everyday for giving me such a perfect special angel to care for & look after every single day.....She is my rock & the sparkle in my life & I love my life with her & the wonderful world we create every day.0 -
No, not judge-y. I understand. I don't want a body builder physique, but I've found that since I don't have weight to lose that setting lifting goals keeps me inspired and motivated, which then results in muscle definition. Sometimes, that's the only type of physical progress to make, particularly for someone like me who doesn't do much cardio anymore.
I'm actually running a lifting program currently as well, my point with my post was that not everyone should feel like the should need to. I think there's an inordinate amount of pressure to conform to one method of doing something. It makes me a sad panda.
@JPW1990 /r/fitness reminds me of the rest of MFP sometimes. Now I sound like one of those "people are mean!" people. /r/xxfitness is more welcoming and tolerates questions like that a lot more readily. And there's nothing stupid about that question!
Confession: I've remained in the shadows in this thread because I was afraid people wouldn't like me. I'm always worried that what I type will come across wrong.0 -
Serious question here: What if you don't want that? I'm 47 - the only people who see me naked is my husband and my dog (she judges me - she recently lost 15% of her bodyweight and is smug about it). I live in a climate where I'm covered up a lot of the time. All I really want is to look ok in my clothes. I feel like MFP is often all about lifting weights, and I'm just not interested in doing that.
That made me smile!
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I plan on using up my remaining calories today on cookies and candy.0
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Confession: I blew my calorie goal. Again.0
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I'm proud to be a Mum to my special needs daughter. She is the most wonderful gift I could ever have in my life.....I get good days with her & I get bad days.....tell me what parent doesn't.
She is 26 years old & still lives at home & I treasure every single moment I have with her both the good & the bad & I thank the universe everyday for giving me such a perfect special angel to care for & look after every single day.....She is my rock & the sparkle in my life & I love my life with her & the wonderful world we create every day.
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Tried to think of a confession all weekend and failed! So these are more random thoughts than actual confessions...
Saturday's breakfast consisted of 1/2 a pack of wildberry skittles, 1/4 of a taco bell chicken quesadilla, and a chocolate chip cookie for good measure. I'm not even really concerned about the calories but sometimes I question whether I should be allowed to adult anymore. Also, I frequently use the word "adult" as a verb.
I am a bit irrationally angry at my boyfriend at the moment because he's not coming to my best friend's wedding in September because his best friend is getting married on the same day. Obviously, this is in no way his fault, but I have to pay for/stay in a hotel room by myself all weekend?! C'mon!
I fully intend on jumping on the FIFA World Cup bandwagon tonight. I love watching soccer but get annoyed that it's rarely shown on TV channels that I get.0 -
I don't really think the parents were being judgmental, at least IMO. Sometimes parents just need a sounding board when things are frustrating, because they don't want to take it out on the child and it's nice to have people who will listen. I wet the bed until I was 7. My parents had to wake me up before they went to bed, and that usually worked.
I'm sure it wasn't their intention to sound that way, and that they are all loving parents who just wanted to let out some frustration.It's just that, as a person who lived in the position of the child, it just hits me on a bit of a personal level, like I'm imagining that my mom or dad said that about me and I heard it/saw it. Obviously it's my own personal issue, and I wasn't meaning to criticize anyone.
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I had a Big Mac yesterday after a long, long time. I kept thinking about it so I thought I could have one just this time.
I thought I would love the taste, that it would remind me of my old eating habits, and that I would also feel guilty afterwards.
Funny thing - it didn't taste as good as I had remembered, and I asked myself "is THIS what you were craving for, all this time?"
Oh, and I didn't even feel guilty afterwards.0 -
I had a Big Mac yesterday after a long, long time. I kept thinking about it so I thought I could have one just this time.
I thought I would love the taste, that it would remind me of my old eating habits, and that I would also feel guilty afterwards.
Funny thing - it didn't taste as good as I had remembered, and I asked myself "is THIS what you were craving for, all this time?"
Oh, and I didn't even feel guilty afterwards.
Ohh boy I love me some Big Macs extra sauce and pickles please!!0 -
Susieq_1994 wrote: »
I'm sure it wasn't their intention to sound that way, and that they are all loving parents who just wanted to let out some frustration.It's just that, as a person who lived in the position of the child, it just hits me on a bit of a personal level, like I'm imagining that my mom or dad said that about me and I heard it/saw it. Obviously it's my own personal issue, and I wasn't meaning to criticize anyone.
You didn't criticize. It is good to be reminded of both sides.
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Kill me now!! I keep allowing myself to go over my count by about a whole day's worth of calories. I seriously need to reevaluate myself and my methods. What I am doing to myself now, is not working. I don't want to blow what little progress I have made already. I am trying to stay honest about how much I am inhaling during the day, but it sure is tough to look back and admit to myself that I am doing this.0
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I had a Big Mac yesterday after a long, long time. I kept thinking about it so I thought I could have one just this time.
I thought I would love the taste, that it would remind me of my old eating habits, and that I would also feel guilty afterwards.
Funny thing - it didn't taste as good as I had remembered, and I asked myself "is THIS what you were craving for, all this time?"
Oh, and I didn't even feel guilty afterwards.
I had the opposite experience. When I first started losing weight, I gave up burgers for quite a while. When I finally ordered my quarter pounder, I was hoping I would wonder why I even used to order them. But it was so dang good!
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I had the opposite experience. When I first started losing weight, I gave up burgers for quite a while. When I finally ordered my quarter pounder, I was hoping I would wonder why I even used to order them. But it was so dang good!
This. I had a qp with cheese on Friday for lunch. It was yummy, but soooo salty. I'm still retaining water.0 -
Susie, first, let me apologize if you feel I am being overly personal and intrusive.
Have you considered that Depo may be contributing to your depression? When I first took it, my doctor asked if I had a history of depression, I said no because I didn't have a history of depression. Two months later I was sitting in my car contemplating suicide. The only think that stopped me was, that as an over-thinker, I couldn't figure out why I felt like that. Nothing in my life had changed for the worse; my feeling weren't based on my reality. I was simply, suddenly, suicidal.
It may also cause spammy pimples.
I wasn't going to say anything, but will now second this. I had never been depressed and started depo after having my first child. I became extremely depressed, but thought it was post-partum depression, which I had read so much about. I also had a lot of other weird symptoms that I'd never experienced before. I got my second shot a week before reading all of the side effects of depo. It was like going down the list of all the things I'd had wrong with me, including the depression. All of the weird symptoms subsided gradually as the depo wore off, and never returned. I will NEVER take depo again!0 -
Susieq_1994 wrote: »Confession: I blew my calorie goal. Again.
SorryI had a Big Mac yesterday after a long, long time. I kept thinking about it so I thought I could have one just this time.
I thought I would love the taste, that it would remind me of my old eating habits, and that I would also feel guilty afterwards.
Funny thing - it didn't taste as good as I had remembered, and I asked myself "is THIS what you were craving for, all this time?"
Oh, and I didn't even feel guilty afterwards.
Yeah the same thing happened to me last time I had fast food. I was craving a cheeseburger. I went to Wendy's and I ended up pretty disappointed. Then I had a couple of my kids' mcDonald's fries (which I used to love), and it was a big disappointment too. Haven't got fast food again since (unless you count Panera etc as fast food). I did try Smashburger, and I loved it, but I felt horrible from all the sodium for a day afterwards, and it's just not worth it for me anymore. Don't even get me started on Pizza Hut... Now I pick my restaurants carefully, lol.
Confession - I somehow by some miracle managed to stick to my 1800 calories today, but that involved a LOT of fruit and veggies, and I'm still hungry. It's just really depressing. I seriously don't understand how the people who bulk then cut do it. I can't seem to be able to cut anymore after maintaining for a year.
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Whatever.0
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OMG
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raelynnsmama52512 wrote: »Does anyone have a good wedding story? Like, did you get married somewhere weird, or whatnot? Just wondering, because we still get funny looks when we mention where we got married (married by a notary public at the car lot he ran) lol. Hubby has already promised me a beach wedding when we decide to renew our vows, but it's still cute and funny about where we actually got married :laugh:
I'm feeling oddly reminiscent and emotional today for some reason, which is weird for me lol.
My aunt and her new husband (second marriage) got married in the floral department of the Meijer where they both worked. It was in the paper at the time.0 -
berlynnwall wrote: »
I would get the job in the private sector first. A lot of the bigger companies offer tuition reimbursement after 6-12 months of emplyment. My company offers $5k per year after 6 months.0 -
Emotional health, one of the things this thread strongly supports, is a component of overall wellbeing. Many of the people who join here used food to cope with emotional distress. A holistic approach to lifestyle change may have greater benefit for some members, more so than a simple mathematical "calories in, calories out" approach.
It has helped to normalize behaviours that many posters in here thought were weird, many of which involved food.
A feeling of being welcome and part of a "community" (another characteristic of this thread) is likely to enhance compliance with the MFP tool. In contrast, some of the other threads in here could well put someone off right at the start. Not everyone arrives at MFP with a thick skin. Not everyone arrives fully committed to change. Some are at an exploratory stage.
Just off the top of my head...
I was nearly put off MFP because of a terrible interaction in another thread! I am not a frequent poster in here, nor am I "part of the in crowd" but I appreciate reading that I am not alone in my struggles, and it has been super beneficial to me...and often SUPER funny too!0 -
pearso21123 wrote: »
My aunt and her new husband (second marriage) got married in the floral department of the Meijer where they both worked. It was in the paper at the time.
Mine was pretty traditional but sweet and very 'us'. Registry office wedding followed by garden party in my in-law's beautiful English country garden. Croquet on the lawn and everything! It's my 21st anniversary next month and I tried on my wedding dress (very fitted style) to see if it would fit. I could get it on but not done up, so that's actually a mini goal. If I can get it done up I'll take a picture and post it here!
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