Confession Time! ((ABSOLUTELY NO JUDGEMENT))
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pofoster21 wrote: »
That is really sad and I agree. People are terrible and go solely on appearances. But congratulations on a 325 lb weight loss. That is amazing and keeping it off for 20 years is incredible!
Thanks, but I haven't totally, that's why I'm on here. Had a blood clot a few years ago and no insurance. Spent 2 years cobbling together treatment as I could, and weight came back on in the meantime. Now I'm just trying to lose again to see how much of the damage was actual fat and how much was fluid added to my legs.0 -
Seconded. Also, sorry @Francl27 I think it's funny and I love your various reactions when it happens.
Me too! I know it's annoying to you b
Oh, gosh. You weren't supposed to see that.
I seriously think of you every damn morning when I open the container (it's in Tupperware) and the aroma of iced cappuccino wafts out at me.
Which brings me to a strange confession... for someone who loathes cooking, and all aspects of meal preparation, I own craploads of Tupperware. All acquired in my younger years when I was not very well off, and that stuff's bloody expensive. I think maybe I had a fantasy that it would make me enjoy cooking, or make it easier, or something like that.
Apparently, this is why I cannot keep Tupperware in the house. I buy it. But I like to cook. Then the kids and everyone else takes home leftover food in the containers and they NEVER BRING THEM BACK! I have been known to go to my kids' houses and rummage through the cabinet, saying "This is mine and this is mine...".
Not sure where that weird half post came from. Tried to edit it, but couldn't. Sorry!0 -
So these are what our conversations have turned into haha!
Oh, jumped on the scale this morning and holy 193.6 lbs batman! I'm so happy lol!0 -
Italian_Buju wrote: »
I would be pissed, like I said in my last post, I would want to freak out.....
I have read a lot of the posts that say it is a deal breaker, and while some people feel that way, I do not always think it is that easy.
If it is some guy you have been with a few months or something, of course, get out right away. But if it is someone you have been with for many years and otherwise the relationship is good and this is not repeat behavior, IMO you really have to decide if it is something worth throwing the whole relationship out.
I know this might not be a popular opinion, but I do not believe the monogamy is natural for humans. Most animals are not monogamous. Even if you are doing your best to be monogamous, sometimes you become drawn to something you cannot control.
I am a firm believer that some people will always cheat, and some people may never, but given the right set of circumstances EVERYONE is capable of cheating. Ever see the movie Unfaithful? Perfect example.
I agree with you.0 -
pofoster21 wrote: »
One of my original posts in this thread was the ridiculous number of socks I have. I sort them by barn socks, socks to wear with street clothes, trouser socks, riding socks and running socks. It's probably a few hundred pair.
I meant to confess then that I am jealous!!! I love socks.0 -
I first got down to my normal weight nearly 20 years ago. I went from around 500 to around 175. People who didn't recognize me treated me completely differently than they did when I was big. I got smiles and courtesy, doors held open - and I don't mean flirting, it was men and women, any ages, the way they treated me was night and day. People who were absolutely cold and wouldn't acknowledge me before would go out of their way to say hi.
Overall, I'd say that had a far bigger impact on me than the random "you need to eat a hot pocket" type comments I'd get once in a while. I'm very distrustful of people in general, now. It takes a very long time before I decide if they're actually a nice person, or if they're a "nice as long as you fit my cookie cutter mold" person. Outside of some dysfunctional family relationships, most of the comments like those in that thread will stop after people get used to seeing the smaller version of the person, but the really rude and unsupportive people are far more subtle.
This is very much the way I think as well. I have kind of an odd story regarding this topic. My Freshman and Sophomore years in high school was the only time I was overweight in my life. Maybe 20 lbs. or so just from not being as active. My Junior year I was in a pretty serious car accident. Multiple injuries and was on a feeding tube in the hospital for 9 days. Well, by the time I got out of there those 20 lbs. were long gone. Here I was, broken, scarred, stitched up in multiple places and limping around with a walker and people were telling me how good I looked! I'd never been so disgusted and disappointed with people in my life. That event has changed forever the way I view people who judge others solely on their size.0 -
smashley_mashley wrote: »
I am sure the others have already posted as I am usually late to the party since I don't have time to post while at work. BUT you should never feel bad about posting in this thread as it is a supportive environment for whatever it us we are dealing with. Thanks for your contribution!
I never saw the original post (thread moves so fast!) but I wanted to say thank you to Caitwn for the time you took to type that out. It's pretty much the conclusion I've come to, as well. I live in the Detroit area. There is no private sector job here with the security that government work can offer, none. I think I look at my salary a lot and get dissatisfied, in addition to the fact that I need a high level of mental stimulation at work or I go nuts, and I do NOT get it here.
But I think I ultimately realize that that security means quite a bit with having 2 very young children. Getting my MS isn't off the table, but it would have to be something I used in other ways without giving up my full-time job. And at that point, I'm not sure the ROI on it would be worth it.0 -
Me too! I know it's annoying to you b
Apparently, this is why I cannot keep Tupperware in the house. I buy it. But I like to cook. Then the kids and everyone else takes home leftover food in the containers and they NEVER BRING THEM BACK! I have been known to go to my kids' houses and rummage through the cabinet, saying "This is mine and this is mine...".
Not sure where that weird half post came from. Tried to edit it, but couldn't. Sorry!
My mom does that. Seriously, I have to raid her cabinets and get my containers back myself lol! I cook, sometimes let her and daddy have what's left, and never see my container(s) again. Usually when I go over there, I'm like, "why the hell are all MY dishes at YOUR house?!" Then I laugh, she laughs, and I bring my dishes back home. I could probably just buy a new set, but I'm too cheap. I found the sets I have on sale on Black Friday the year we moved. (Yeah, everyone else was shopping at Walmart for gifts, I was more excited about the $1.74 towels and washcloths, the $7 Rubbermaid "Tupperware" sets, and the $100 vacuum cleaner I got on sale for $40! That was my Christmas in 2013 lol.)0 -
@pofoster21, I love the photo! You two look great together and she's a beautiful horse.
Tupperware: my mom bought me some of the real stuff when I first moved out (eleven years ago?) and I loved it and used it constantly...until one of my roommates melted a bunch of the lids somehow. I think I might have cried. It was almost as bad as the time our current roommate broke the glass bowl for my KitchenAid. He had to go to the ER because it cut him up so badly so I couldn't be mad at him, but still. So sad.
Now I only buy glass "tupperware"-type containers though, no plastic, because I'm paranoid about getting it clean otherwise. I hate plastic anything for food - glass, stainless, ceramic all day for me. Again...total clean freak over here.0 -
FluffySandwich wrote: »So I've finally walked the stage and received my diploma. I'm beat.
My mom took me to buy a swimsuit today because she's in the city and wanted to treat me to something before I go on vacation, and I had a lot of them to try. I liked the first one a lot, and felt ok about the following ones but felt myself getting more and more self-conscious. I finally summoned the courage to ask my mom what she thought of one of them, and the look on her face just sent my heart plummeting. She then said ''I... don't know about that...'' Obviously, she was most likely just reacting to the bathing suit rather than criticizing my body, but after that I looked back into the mirror and couldn't stop staring at every little flaw... especially my fat legs. She liked another one, though, the one that I liked the most anyway, and she left me alone to get dressed. I proceeded to have a mini panic attack and started to cry in the changing room because I just felt so ugly and fat. Blah. If I feel like that from having my mom look at me, I'm seriously terrified of how I will be on the beach... if I can even work up the courage to go out there.
I mean, it was a nice thing for her to buy me a swimsuit and I pretty much ruined my afternoon by getting all depressed. After that I just wanted to lay down and go to sleep... I need to start body lovin' instead of hating on it all the time.
Way behind, but wanted to say something that my SIL, she has her own website and is a personal trainer, has been preaching for awhile, 'replace all the negative self talk with positive self talk'. In essence, if you think, 'my legs are so fat', then you have to say, 'my legs are strong and they get me where I need to go'. The ultimate goal is to get rid of the negative self talk and replace it with positive. It has worked well for me lately when I realize I'm doing it. Anyway, hope that helps at least a little.
And yay for graduating!0 -
We I still have to wash pots and pans because the MIL is concerned that the Teflon coating gets damaged. Her house, her rules I guess. I just hate cooking AND washing up.
Hate that! That's not fair to you, either. Those duties should be shared.0 -
raelynnsmama52512 wrote: »
My mom does that. Seriously, I have to raid her cabinets and get my containers back myself lol! I cook, sometimes let her and daddy have what's left, and never see my container(s) again. Usually when I go over there, I'm like, "why the hell are all MY dishes at YOUR house?!" Then I laugh, she laughs, and I bring my dishes back home. I could probably just buy a new set, but I'm too cheap. I found the sets I have on sale on Black Friday the year we moved. (Yeah, everyone else was shopping at Walmart for gifts, I was more excited about the $1.74 towels and washcloths, the $7 Rubbermaid "Tupperware" sets, and the $100 vacuum cleaner I got on sale for $40! That was my Christmas in 2013 lol.)
All of my "Tupperware" is essentially the plastic containers deli meat comes in. LOL Except for my cake taker. That's legit.0 -
Italian_Buju wrote: »
Sorry, I was to edit this for spelling and also to add something but my phone was being stupid....so now I am on the laptop...
I wanted to add that I was only trying to show the other side of all the posts that say it is a deal breaker 100%, because IMO it is not always. You have to look at the big picture.
Definitely, which is why in my post earlier I mentioned the one poster prior who had gone through this and made it work. Sorry, I cannot remember who it was. I should've acknowledged her.0 -
And woot! I stepped on the scale today and my body finally released the stupid 2-4 lbs of water (it varied) it held on to for this past week and even gave me another -1 lb for my wait.
So now I'm down 17 pounds. With another 23 lbs to go until goal. That makes me feel awesome.
I've been feeling kind of grumpy/crabby/exhausted the last few days so I went to bed at 8 pm last night after I put both my kids to bed. It felt AMAZING to sleep for 10 hours. I used to average 4-5 hrs/night.0 -
kelly_c_77 wrote: »
I do too! Never have a problem!
I cannot bring myself to do that. But, I only do three loads per week: darks, lights, and whites. Have to bleach my whites. I have to do the laundry, though (good thing I enjoy it) because my husband thinks clothes are to be sorted by TYPES, such as dress clothes, workout clothes, towels (of all colors together). No. You cannot wash light colored dress shirts with dark pants! Just a "me" thing, I'm sure.0 -
pofoster21 wrote: »
That is funny! I may adopt that as well...a way to get around swearing!
I'm going to start using this as well.0 -
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AngryViking1970 wrote: »
All of my "Tupperware" is essentially the plastic containers deli meat comes in. LOL Except for my cake taker. That's legit.
My ILs do that too lol! All this talking about Tupperware reminds me that I do actually need to pick up a new set so poor hubs has something to take lunches in lol.0 -
So today my husband comes home - he's currently on an away a week/home a week work schedule. Needless to say I'll be busy today trying to look like I've completely done ALL the jobs I planned to do when he was away, clean the house etc etc.
He's not a tyrant in any way, but because I'm not working at the moment, I think it's my job to do everything around the house so that he doesn't have to be concerned about it. I always feel like I need to have something to show for my free time - 'Look at this clean house!' or 'I did the garden!' or 'Here, I single handedly sanded and stained this big-@ss deck! Be pleased with me!'
Edit: Ok, this sounds terrible. Like he's going to do a white-glove inspection when he gets home. I should say that he puts NO pressure on me - I do it to myself. I like it to appear that I haven't spent the entire time he was away on the internet. Right, off to fix the garden gate!0 -
So today my husband comes home - he's currently on an away a week/home a week work schedule. Needless to say I'll be busy today trying to look like I've completely done ALL the jobs I planned to do when he was away, clean the house etc etc.
He's not a tyrant in any way, but because I'm not working at the moment, I think it's my job to do everything around the house so that he doesn't have to be concerned about it. I always feel like I need to have something to show for my free time - 'Look at this clean house!' or 'I did the garden!' or 'Here, I single handedly sanded and stained this big-@ss deck! Be pleased with me!'
Got any tips for others? Lol! I probably have to be the worst housewife ever, I seriously suck at it.
ETA: It's to the point hubby calls me when he's headed home, just to give me a heads up to get dinner started and clean up. Usually he's an hour or so away, so then it's a mad scramble to make it look like I've actually done something. Sigh, I hope the doctors office is quick with an appointment, I piss myself off being like this. Ugh.0 -
raelynnsmama52512 wrote: »
Got any tips for others? Lol! I probably have to be the worst housewife ever, I seriously suck at it.
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For more laundry talk, here's 1 morning of baseball/softball game day laundry. 4 loads there for 55 lb washers, everything gets soaked overnight, everything gets scrubbed by hand, washed twice, then hung to dry.
Scrubbed by hand?! Wow, I'm into cleanliness, but that's really impressive! Lots of work, though. Making me tired just thinking about it.0 -
pofoster21 wrote: »@lbuehler89 I love your new picture. Gorgeous!
Ditto! And @pofoster21 Pheobe is gorgeous! That is a great picture. Thanks for sharing.0 -
Make lists. Check things off. Seriously - best way to get anything done.
Wanna know the bad part? There are lists posted in nearly every room of the house, but I still forget. I guess I'm gonna have to learn how to iPhone and put the lists in my phone somehow to remind me lol.0 -
Aaaaand apparently my dog got ahold of something that didn't agree with her because she just puked, twice.0
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@pofoster21, I love the photo! You two look great together and she's a beautiful horse.
Tupperware: my mom bought me some of the real stuff when I first moved out (eleven years ago?) and I loved it and used it constantly...until one of my roommates melted a bunch of the lids somehow. I think I might have cried. It was almost as bad as the time our current roommate broke the glass bowl for my KitchenAid. He had to go to the ER because it cut him up so badly so I couldn't be mad at him, but still. So sad.
Now I only buy glass "tupperware"-type containers though, no plastic, because I'm paranoid about getting it clean otherwise. I hate plastic anything for food - glass, stainless, ceramic all day for me. Again...total clean freak over here.
I would love to buy the glass ones, because the plastic ones stain so badly when I put anything containing tomatoes/tomato sauce/tomato paste in them. :-/ Also, they tend to take on the smell of stuff like garlic and onions, and it's hard to scrub the smell out. -_-
The main problem is that I'm EXTREMELY clumsy, and anything glass is bound to be very short-lived in my house, so I really can't do that. I'm so jealous of people who can have glass dishes and those oh-so-pretty delicate porcelain teacups and... and... *cries from envy*
Fun fact: Whenever my husband hears a bang from another room, he calls out... "What did you break this time?" And if he DOESN'T hear any bangs, he comes to check if I'm okay because it's too quiet...0 -
Thanks. I appreciate it. This is the approach I'm taking. Like I said I haven't talked to him so I want to see what he has to say. I don't know if it's a good idea but as I've been going through things this week, I've been writing down thoughts/feelings. If he is open to listening, I want to share how it's affected me. Overall he has been great so this is a surprise. I'm not sure he realized how bad this really is. But then again, he was hiding it so maybe he does...
I have five free therapy sessions through work so I'm going to get his schedule and figure out when we are both free to go and make an appointment if he is willing. If not, I will give up.
I agree though. I think that monogamy is hard for a lot of people and probably not natural. However, I'd rather have someone admit to me that they aren't happy being with just me instead of going behind my back. If he is a man who wants to be in a relationship with me, I don't want to share and he will have to say no to temptation.
And yes, I've seen Unfaithful. That is a sad movie.
Also, I hope you are doing okay. I love the pictures of your rodent baby and I feel so bad for you. At least you know he had a good life with you!
VERY sound and intelligent reasoning. Sounds like you are thinking clearly. I think he HAS to listen to you. You deserve that. Good idea about the therapy. It is worth a try.
Do you think on some level he knew you would find out and he was looking for attention or a reaction from you? I'm NOT saying that's right or okay. But, it makes me wonder what his underlying motive was: to actually have an affair or to bring attention to the fact that he needs or wants something changed in your current relationship?
A mature adult would just talk about it, but lots of people aren't really capable of doing that and look for another way to approach a topic. Either way, hang in there, keep writing down your feelings and best of luck to you on Friday!0 -
Susieq_1994 wrote: »
I would love to buy the glass ones, because the plastic ones stain so badly when I put anything containing tomatoes/tomato sauce/tomato paste in them. :-/ Also, they tend to take on the smell of stuff like garlic and onions, and it's hard to scrub the smell out. -_-
The main problem is that I'm EXTREMELY clumsy, and anything glass is bound to be very short-lived in my house, so I really can't do that. I'm so jealous of people who can have glass dishes and those oh-so-pretty delicate porcelain teacups and... and... *cries from envy*
Fun fact: Whenever my husband hears a bang from another room, he calls out... "What did you break this time?" And if he DOESN'T hear any bangs, he comes to check if I'm okay because it's too quiet...
Miss clumsy here too lol! I've been thinking about switching to plastic only because I've broken so many glasses. I'm very accident prone lol. Love to cook, but I usually injure myself in the process. I'm actually missing part of my pad on my left pinky due to an unfortunate mandolin slicer incident. Yeah, it's bad lol :laugh:
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Make lists. Check things off. Seriously - best way to get anything done.
I love checking things off of my to-do list so much that if I've delayed and made the list after doing half of my chores, I'll still write those down just so I can check them off and feel accomplished.
I keep a magnetic whiteboard thingy on my refrigerator and I write down tasks that need doing on it. But I'm honestly pretty lazy about getting things done myself... Either I do it all in one energy-crazed day or I let it all stagnate for a week. O.o0 -
quiksylver296 wrote: »
♫♪When you're a Jet, you're a Jet all the way. From your first cigarette, to your last dying day.♫♪
You have to snap your fingers, too.
LOL!0
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