Confession Time! ((ABSOLUTELY NO JUDGEMENT))

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  • sam3790
    sam3790 Posts: 2 Member
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    First time posting. Hello everyone!
    I've done sooo may of these confessions, especially the ones that involve not actually tracking when I should or not tracking my weight unless I've lost.
    Mine is... I think I'm secretly trying to make my fiance fatter so I feel better. I always bring him cake and stuff from where I work and I get kinda irritated when he loses weight which makes me feel a little bad. He's at a healthy weight though and doesn't really need to lose, but it seems like guys lose it so much easier.. I'm also NOT anorexic and I think all those "pro-ana" sites are pretty horrible if people really have a problem and need help, but sometimes the "thinspiration" and tips for when you're hungry kinda help (although I'm not into the super boney look)
  • bkhamill
    bkhamill Posts: 1,289 Member
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    I have to go get a cervical biopsy in a few minutes. I'm not looking forward to this.
  • raelynnsmama52512
    raelynnsmama52512 Posts: 1,184 Member
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    bkhamill wrote: »
    I have to go get a cervical biopsy in a few minutes. I'm not looking forward to this.

    Hugs! Hoping everything is ok! ❤️
  • nonoelmo
    nonoelmo Posts: 3,941 Member
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    bkhamill wrote: »
    I have to go get a cervical biopsy in a few minutes. I'm not looking forward to this.

    Good luck with the procedure and outcome
  • BZAH10
    BZAH10 Posts: 5,709 Member
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    eMka11 wrote: »
    About 6 years ago I used to have an eating disorder.
    Due to severe malnutrition, my heart, kidneys and liver were failing.
    I was estimated to live for roughly 6 more weeks.

    Today that's long past me. I'm healthy, exercising, eating clean, varied and enough.
    I'm no longer having self-destructive thoughts about body or food.

    However, my girlfriend recently brought up she wanted to lose weight.
    She's healthy, and quite skinny already, and I'm scared to death.
    We've talked and fought a lot about it.

    I decided her feeling-good would go before my fears.
    So now I'm supporting her in her weight loss and we started exercising together. (As to where she never did any exercise..)

    I'm supporting her but it feels so wrong. It's so much against my nature.
    It's bringing back traumatic experiences I've gone through being admitted to an institution for EDs.

    I feel guilty because I told her about all of this, and she got mad.
    She got mad because she knew about my past already, but decided to be straightforward with me about it and now regrets it. She's mad because she's blaming herself for me feeling bad due to her own choices.
    At least that's what she believes, because ofcourse I'm scared mostly due to how in my head it links to past experiences.

    I know it might be irrational to think she's going to go the same route.
    But I know she too has seen both sides of the "weight" coin. (Having been both very skinny/chubby)

    As I said I'm supporting her, pushing my own thoughts and fears aside, but when I do that she just gets angry.
    Now she completely is reluctant to losing weight, I believe she's afraid to hurt me.
    I myself feel bad since I know she feels bad in her own body, but no longer dares to change it out of fear of my reaction to that.

    No matter how many times I tell her the 'problem' of my bad mood about the topic is my own personal experiences, she seems to always take it personally anyway.
    I'm being confronted with my past, yes, but then it's my responsibility to deal with it.
    It's almost as if she feels responsible, doesn't want me to have to deal with it, thus puts her own desires aside in the hope it would make me more happy.

    In truth it doesn't make either of us happy. I'm still trying to support her (though not pushing) in making healthier choices, subtly and not too often, cause I know I am ready to do so, and -I- just have to deal with my own mind.
    She told me that she needs 100% of support of everyone around her to be able to lose weight.
    I'm doing my best but she just ignores my efforts, she doesn't even accept my support.

    I'm not quite sure what to do.

    I'm sorry to hear how much you have been through and I can understand your current situation with your girlfriend can bring back all that. I believe in being honest with each other and I hope you both will eventually manage to find a way out and forward. I am not great in giving advice but I will keep fingers crossed for you and her.

    I'm glad you quoted this. It was a very well thought out confession and I didn't want to ignore it, but couldn't find it. @governatorkp I think recognizing that you need to look out for yourself even though you want to help your friend is very important. She should be more understanding of your situation as well. If not, that is selfish on her part. Stay strong, take care of yourself first, and realize that you can only do so much for someone else. Your intentions are good, which is all that matters.
  • raelynnsmama52512
    raelynnsmama52512 Posts: 1,184 Member
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    MoHousdon wrote: »
    BZAH10 wrote: »
    I really love this thread. You guys have helped me through a pretty hard time, and I have seen you help so many other people through hard times as well. People on the internet can be awful, but they can also be great. Best thread ever.

    Same here. This thread has affected my life in many ways. All good ways, which is why I struggle so much to keep up. But I have to accept that I cannot. I have to balance it out with real life, but I'll be here for as long as this thread exists!

    Same for me too. I feel like I've really gotten to know some of you really well, especially when we did the real name thing. Several hundred pages back. I've learned a lot and am very grateful for all of you. Thanks for being so accepting and friendly. Never go away, okay?!

    Is it too late for me to get in on that and tell everyone my name? Because I was just a lurker back then... I was just wondering about that yesterday!

    No! Fess up!

    ETA: Late to the party again! Your name is gorgeous, Sawsan!

    Your name is beautiful, Sawsan!

    I've got the quintessential 90s kid name (Stephanie), which is one of many reasons my kid has a relatively different (but not "weird") name. I went by my middle name (Rene-pronounced Renee', and I spelled it like normal) most of my childhood and teen years. I didn't want to embrace my name(s), until I was an adult, which looking back was pretty stupid.

    I think I missed the name section too somehow. Anyway, I have a very popular 80's name, so I can relate. My name is Amber.

    I've always liked the name Amber lol. I do know there were a lot of them when I was in school, just like Stephanies lol.

    Thank you. I was always jealous of my sister, because she has a much less common name and didn't have to be 'first name, last initial' all through school. I guess now she is easier to google though.

    Lol that's one reason why we chose our daughter's name (it's part of my username lol). I'm not seeing it become too much of a "trendy" name right now lol.
  • BZAH10
    BZAH10 Posts: 5,709 Member
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    nonoelmo wrote: »
    MoHousdon wrote: »
    BZAH10 wrote: »
    I really love this thread. You guys have helped me through a pretty hard time, and I have seen you help so many other people through hard times as well. People on the internet can be awful, but they can also be great. Best thread ever.

    Same here. This thread has affected my life in many ways. All good ways, which is why I struggle so much to keep up. But I have to accept that I cannot. I have to balance it out with real life, but I'll be here for as long as this thread exists!

    Same for me too. I feel like I've really gotten to know some of you really well, especially when we did the real name thing. Several hundred pages back. I've learned a lot and am very grateful for all of you. Thanks for being so accepting and friendly. Never go away, okay?!
    I was late to that party. I'm Laura

    And, now I'm going to have to take notes to remember everyone's names!
  • girldownsouth
    girldownsouth Posts: 920 Member
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    JPW1990 wrote: »
    I am currently listening to a co-worker b!tching at her husband on the phone. It has been going on all day, on and off. If I get up and shut her office door, do you think she'd get the point?!? >:)

    That or stand in it and take notes.

    Is it just annoying you or is it making you uncomfortable?

    I hated hearing the man in the cubicle next to me while I was in America Skype his wife. He treated her like she was some kind of moron who must be falling apart without him.

    Chauvinist pig!
  • kecmw25
    kecmw25 Posts: 2,743 Member
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    I confess that I am addicted to chapstick. I carry it with me everywhere. I mention this because I just had a 2nd one bite the dust on me this week and I'm so glad I have a spare in my desk at work. It doesn't have to be the Chapstick brand. I will try all kinds and probably have 10 tubes at home. I bought myself some for my Christmas stocking last year.
  • JustMe2C
    JustMe2C Posts: 101 Member
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    Thanks for the welcomes! :) And hi, sam!

    I think you all have great names. Mine is Carol. Now what in the world can you do with that...other than start singing Christmas songs?! LOL
  • Oberon21
    Oberon21 Posts: 13,235 Member
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    Just_Ceci wrote: »
    JPW1990 wrote: »
    ythannah wrote: »
    JPW1990 wrote: »
    ythannah wrote: »
    JPW1990 wrote: »
    ythannah wrote: »
    JPW1990 wrote: »
    ythannah wrote: »
    ShibaEars wrote: »
    tigerThea wrote: »
    ShibaEars wrote: »
    BZAH10 wrote: »
    Rabbit914 wrote: »
    BZAH10 wrote: »
    Sounds like you're a naturally strong person, so you probably don't need it. I do. I'm quite the weakling. Well, physically anyway. Mentally, no. Mentally I'm known as the Boot Camp Drill Sargent in my family. Physically, well??? Let's just say that sometimes going in and out of the grocery store I step onto the automatic door thingy and the door doesn't open. Thankfully, I learned from "Toy Story" to jump up and down once or twice and the door opens. My son finds this highly amusing and will lag behind me just to watch it happen.

    See and I can picture that and it's awesome. haha

    Awesomely embarrassing, yes!

    I don't jump up and down, but sometimes I have to cha cha back and forth to catch the sensor. We'd be a blast trying to get into the store together.

    I can join your little group. I was following someone into a store one day and the door almost closed on me. Scared the crap outta me and I probably looked funny jumping out of the way. Maybe all three of us could get it to work lol.

    Apparently I walk too fast....or lack a soul, I have walked into those darn doors more than once. Maybe I'll try disco dancing up to them to give the doors a chance.

    LOL, that's what I've said about myself when they won't work :grin:

    I am currently drinking a protein shake. Why, oh why can they not make a protein powder that tastes good?!

    Two words: Dyna Whey. Available at Superstore (and Costco, if you have one).

    But ONLY in Canada, because you are greedy protein that doesn't taste icky bastages.

    Oh, gosh. You weren't supposed to see that. o:)

    I seriously think of you every damn morning when I open the container (it's in Tupperware) and the aroma of iced cappuccino wafts out at me.

    Which brings me to a strange confession... for someone who loathes cooking, and all aspects of meal preparation, I own craploads of Tupperware. All acquired in my younger years when I was not very well off, and that stuff's bloody expensive. I think maybe I had a fantasy that it would make me enjoy cooking, or make it easier, or something like that.

    When I first moved out, I had all my mom's old tupperware, and then my aunt sent me a giant box full because she bought all new. I have it in 80's pastels and 70's avocado and pumpkin. Between my husband and I, we cook ALL the time, but we never bother with the tupperware. We use gladlock containers and freezer bags for everything.

    I bet you don't have the gigantic cake taker caddy thing, which has only ever seen use as a bucket when my water tank pressure valve decided to leak. How about the pick-a-deli? (And I never buy pickles!) TWO sets of the canisters? Enough mixing bowls to start your own bakery?

    Sadly, the only piece that I didn't purchase is the big divided server thing, for fresh fruit or veggies. Somebody unloaded it on me. And I don't entertain.

    I had the cake taker. Then I used it for the intended purpose, and put a cake in it. That resulted in everyone forgetting there was a cake in it, and when I remembered and took it down, it was moldy. Which is why I had a cake taker but no longer have a cake taker. I have the popsicle molds, though.

    Want another cake taker? :)

    I have two of the pie takers. I use them a lot for transporting cheesecake to potluck events, and for keeping cheesecake in the fridge... because even I can't finish off a 9" cheesecake in a few days.

    Mmm... cheesecake...

    No thanks, the inherent problem with the cake taker is you can't see the cake inside, so forget it's there.

    I don't understand this concept of forgetting there is cake!

    Ditto I had the same reaction. How do you forget cake????
  • CountessKitteh
    CountessKitteh Posts: 1,505 Member
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    MoHousdon wrote: »
    BZAH10 wrote: »
    I really love this thread. You guys have helped me through a pretty hard time, and I have seen you help so many other people through hard times as well. People on the internet can be awful, but they can also be great. Best thread ever.

    Same here. This thread has affected my life in many ways. All good ways, which is why I struggle so much to keep up. But I have to accept that I cannot. I have to balance it out with real life, but I'll be here for as long as this thread exists!

    Same for me too. I feel like I've really gotten to know some of you really well, especially when we did the real name thing. Several hundred pages back. I've learned a lot and am very grateful for all of you. Thanks for being so accepting and friendly. Never go away, okay?!

    Is it too late for me to get in on that and tell everyone my name? Because I was just a lurker back then... I was just wondering about that yesterday!

    Go for it. I was just a lurker then too. My name is Jody :)

    Ooh, yay! I'm Sawsan. :) It's an Arabic name, and sounds nothing like Suzanne, which is what every non-Arab seems to call me. -_- It sounds like So-Sen (With a sssss sound, like in snake) and it means lily flower.

    Can you tell that I was totally looking forward to sharing all that? :o

    Lilies are my favorite!
  • BZAH10
    BZAH10 Posts: 5,709 Member
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    bkhamill wrote: »
    I have to go get a cervical biopsy in a few minutes. I'm not looking forward to this.

    Hope all goes well!
  • kecmw25
    kecmw25 Posts: 2,743 Member
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    Confession #2 of the day: Last Friday, I was chatting with one of the security guards and he told me it was his birthday. So I did what I thought was amusing and underestimated his age. He asked me if I was flirting with him and I was so embarrassed, I probably turned bright red. Now when I see him I try to be nice but not flirtatious but it still feels awkward.

    2nd part of the confession, Monday when I asked him how his bday was, he told me he got to have cake and steak. Now I want cake and steak.
  • CooCooPuff
    CooCooPuff Posts: 4,374 Member
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    bkhamill wrote: »
    I have to go get a cervical biopsy in a few minutes. I'm not looking forward to this.
    I wish you well!

  • Oberon21
    Oberon21 Posts: 13,235 Member
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    pofoster21 wrote: »
    sngqfx8x5p1k.jpg

    Sharing a picture of Phoebe and me from Sunday. We moved up to 3' (tried a few years ago and we had a few issues, so backed down and have been working on it every since -- my issues not hers) and tried again this past Sunday. She was amazing and we ROCKED it. :)

    Plus, this is my first time trying to post a photo in here from my computer. I made it work on tablet, have never been able to figure out phone, so let's see if desktop works!

    That is an awesome picture! Phoebe is beautiful! You look a little scared. Is that the "issue" you were talking about? (I rode as a kid, then developed an allergy to horses through puberty and can't ride anymore. Broke out in huge hives and almost had to go to the ER.) I remember having to work through my fear sometimes so my horse wouldn't pick up on it.

    No, not scared. Once I get over the first fence I am pretty much not scared. It was getting over that first fence! I was more worried I would do something to cause her to stop. She only stops if she senses uncertainty in you or if you miss a distance. I had a hard left turn there to get to the next jump. But... in all the pictures I look like that. I think I may just be really really concentrating. :) Its more of a grimace. I have to work on looking prettier and similing when I go over a jump instead of looking like I am literally picking up all 1200 lbs of her and throwing her over the fence!!!!!!!!!
  • rungirl1973
    rungirl1973 Posts: 2,559 Member
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    sam3790 wrote: »
    First time posting. Hello everyone!
    I've done sooo may of these confessions, especially the ones that involve not actually tracking when I should or not tracking my weight unless I've lost.
    Mine is... I think I'm secretly trying to make my fiance fatter so I feel better. I always bring him cake and stuff from where I work and I get kinda irritated when he loses weight which makes me feel a little bad. He's at a healthy weight though and doesn't really need to lose, but it seems like guys lose it so much easier.. I'm also NOT anorexic and I think all those "pro-ana" sites are pretty horrible if people really have a problem and need help, but sometimes the "thinspiration" and tips for when you're hungry kinda help (although I'm not into the super boney look)

    Welcome to the party!
    One of my exes was 6'7" and 180 lbs. I definitely tried to fatten him up. I only weighed 25 lbs less than him, and I'm 11" shorter!
  • Susieq_1994
    Susieq_1994 Posts: 5,361 Member
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    Well, I have a not-so-confessiony confession (that sounded weird.). I've mentioned here before that I was writing a book on an amateur writing website (Wattpad). Today, I finally finished the book! I just posted the final chapter like... Fifteen minutes ago.

    My husband refused to read it until it was fully complete (he hates incomplete things, whether they're books or series) but he wanted to read it when it was done. So, he read it today, and I was really nervous because he's usually reeeeally picky about the books he reads. He said that he enjoyed it and the plot was really unique! (very rare praise from him) I'm SO GIDDY RIGHT NOW. :D

    I also got tons of feedback on how unique and original the storyline is from almost every single commenter, so now I feel all warm and fuzzy and special. ;) Yay me!
  • AngryViking1970
    AngryViking1970 Posts: 2,847 Member
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    When I log my weight, I go by the first three numbers on the scale. None of those decimal points for me!

    I am a loon; I just spent like 30 minutes looking for my first confession and found it on page 61. It's like I don't have actual work to do or something.
  • MoHousdon
    MoHousdon Posts: 8,719 Member
    edited June 2015
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    For those of you that don't know, my name is Monique. Unlike some of you, there are LOTS of nicknames/parodies for it. The thing that's most annoying about having an uncommon name, is that I can never find any personalized items with my name. You can find Monica all day long, but I've only found a Monique keychain once and you better believe I bought that baby.