Confession Time! ((ABSOLUTELY NO JUDGEMENT))

spacequiztime wrote: »

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kelly_c_77 wrote: »

So many things to comment on, I've lost track..
@orangesmartie, I support you and your relationship and find it very interesting to hear about. I totally rooting for you guys to all get on the same page! Hope it happens soon!
@LH85DC, take a break...relax and get back to it when you are ready!
I love roller coaster and amusement park rides...but I can't help but think about bad things happening almost the entire time I'm riding them...I'm a worry wart...but still love them!
You guys can be happy that you'll never have to hear me talk about my Blizzard situation again after this post because I got them both today...one brownie batter and one reeses pb cup...I ate them both...for lunch. I am 69 calories in the red but after my walk this afternoon and running around outside with my son, I will have earned enough calories for a light dinner. No regrets!

I know I'm forgetting to comment on other stuff...???

Great! You picked two good flavors too.

spacequiztime wrote: »

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kelly_c_77 wrote: »

So many things to comment on, I've lost track..
@orangesmartie, I support you and your relationship and find it very interesting to hear about. I totally rooting for you guys to all get on the same page! Hope it happens soon!
@LH85DC, take a break...relax and get back to it when you are ready!
I love roller coaster and amusement park rides...but I can't help but think about bad things happening almost the entire time I'm riding them...I'm a worry wart...but still love them!
You guys can be happy that you'll never have to hear me talk about my Blizzard situation again after this post because I got them both today...one brownie batter and one reeses pb cup...I ate them both...for lunch. I am 69 calories in the red but after my walk this afternoon and running around outside with my son, I will have earned enough calories for a light dinner. No regrets!

I know I'm forgetting to comment on other stuff...???

Great! You picked two good flavors too.

Glad to hear you're starting to improve a bit @Susieq_1994 !

Very sorry to hear about your daughter @raelynnsmama52512 . The thought of a kid that young not even being able to sleep well just depresses me. You are handling this as well as one can.

I'm also very sorry to hear about those of you that have miscarried. I still remember when the oldest sister in the family lost her first. She's went from a very loud, in your face type of person to a very reserved person until she got pregnant again.

Susieq_1994 wrote: »

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kellyjellybellyjelly wrote: »

Susieq_1994 wrote: »

LBuehrle8 wrote: »

Susieq_1994 wrote: »

Guys? I want to bake these: http://prettysimplesweet.com/chocolate-chip-cookie-cheesecake-bars/

... Anyone willing to take them off my hands if I were to offer to bake them for you? Not that I can even bake in this condition, but I'm bored out of my mind and want something to do so I've been browsing recipes. :-/

You don't have to ask me twice!! Oh wow!! YUM

I really wish I knew more people just so I can bake and dump my baked goods on them. *sigh* But Eid is coming and I'm totally making a HUGE peanut butter pie and totally eating a ton of it. Calories don't count in Eid, after all.

Yum! What's your favorite thing to bake? You could make some blondies & make some peanut butter cookie dough to go on top of them.

Everything! Cookies, mostly, and blondies. I'm really not a big fan of most cakes (blasphemy, I know), so I almost never make cakes unless someone else is going to do most of the eating (like for family parties and such). I'm really thinking of baking the chocolate chip cookie cheesecake bars that I posted a link for yesterday along with the peanut butter pie, but I'm thinking that it might be too much--there are only two of us, after all! I REALLY want to bake it, though. Sigh.

In case you missed that link, it's this one: http://prettysimplesweet.com/chocolate-chip-cookie-cheesecake-bars/

Susieq_1994 wrote: »

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kellyjellybellyjelly wrote: »

Susieq_1994 wrote: »

LBuehrle8 wrote: »

Susieq_1994 wrote: »

Guys? I want to bake these: http://prettysimplesweet.com/chocolate-chip-cookie-cheesecake-bars/

... Anyone willing to take them off my hands if I were to offer to bake them for you? Not that I can even bake in this condition, but I'm bored out of my mind and want something to do so I've been browsing recipes. :-/

You don't have to ask me twice!! Oh wow!! YUM

I really wish I knew more people just so I can bake and dump my baked goods on them. *sigh* But Eid is coming and I'm totally making a HUGE peanut butter pie and totally eating a ton of it. Calories don't count in Eid, after all.

Yum! What's your favorite thing to bake? You could make some blondies & make some peanut butter cookie dough to go on top of them.

Everything! Cookies, mostly, and blondies. I'm really not a big fan of most cakes (blasphemy, I know), so I almost never make cakes unless someone else is going to do most of the eating (like for family parties and such). I'm really thinking of baking the chocolate chip cookie cheesecake bars that I posted a link for yesterday along with the peanut butter pie, but I'm thinking that it might be too much--there are only two of us, after all! I REALLY want to bake it, though. Sigh.

In case you missed that link, it's this one: http://prettysimplesweet.com/chocolate-chip-cookie-cheesecake-bars/

raelynnsmama52512 wrote: »

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kecmw25 wrote: »

raelynnsmama52512 wrote: »

Well, now that I'm a little calmer, I think I can update everyone on Raelynn's situation. (( Cliff noting what the doctor said and it's a bit long. ))

-She has been officially and definitely diagnosed with SPD and Anxiety.

-The only treatment for her SPD and (at her age) Anxiety is occupational and behavioral therapy. Unfortunately, we can't afford the therapy, so that can't happen until we get approved for TEFRA (secondary Medicaid for special needs and insurance), but:

-She is being referred to ChildFind (services through the school district), but the county/district we live in is notoriously difficult for getting kids in. We'll have to see what they tell us.

-Doctor also gave us information on some community resources that may be available for us, just depends on if there is anything in Laurens County.

-She scored an 81 on the tests they did yesterday, which puts her right below "average" for her age and development, but the score for "average" runs between an 85-115 (low average-high average) so according to that she's just below which could mean she will be denied TEFRA. Doctor did tell me to be prepared to file an appeal should that happen and she will help us with it.

-She's been having issues with going to sleep for a while now, like fighting sleep and crying at bedtime, and waking up multiple times in a night so we have to start her on melatonin 2 hours before bedtime, because she's so wound up she can't go to sleep (SPD effect). We also have to start her on a fiber regimen, because she has a terrible habit of holding poops (major SPD problem).

-Basically, we have to keep her life as routine and rigid as possible. No potty training, no big changes, just making sure she knows what to expect every day so hopefully it will help alleviate some of her anxiety issues until we can get therapy going. (Needless to say, our plans of "expanding our family" are on hold until further notice since that would obviously be a huge change in her life. Which, if putting that on hold makes her life easier and we can help her, I'm okay with that.)

She's got a long way to go, but we're going to do everything that we can to help her!

Hang in there Mommy!! This sounds like a lot to deal with and I'm sure you're doing/going to do great but don't forget to take care of yourself too!! (((hugs)))

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kecmw25 wrote: »

pofoster21 wrote: »

raelynnsmama52512 wrote: »

Well, now that I'm a little calmer, I think I can update everyone on Raelynn's situation. (( Cliff noting what the doctor said and it's a bit long. ))

-She has been officially and definitely diagnosed with SPD and Anxiety.

-The only treatment for her SPD and (at her age) Anxiety is occupational and behavioral therapy. Unfortunately, we can't afford the therapy, so that can't happen until we get approved for TEFRA (secondary Medicaid for special needs and insurance), but:

-She is being referred to ChildFind (services through the school district), but the county/district we live in is notoriously difficult for getting kids in. We'll have to see what they tell us.

-Doctor also gave us information on some community resources that may be available for us, just depends on if there is anything in Laurens County.

-She scored an 81 on the tests they did yesterday, which puts her right below "average" for her age and development, but the score for "average" runs between an 85-115 (low average-high average) so according to that she's just below which could mean she will be denied TEFRA. Doctor did tell me to be prepared to file an appeal should that happen and she will help us with it.

-She's been having issues with going to sleep for a while now, like fighting sleep and crying at bedtime, and waking up multiple times in a night so we have to start her on melatonin 2 hours before bedtime, because she's so wound up she can't go to sleep (SPD effect). We also have to start her on a fiber regimen, because she has a terrible habit of holding poops (major SPD problem).

-Basically, we have to keep her life as routine and rigid as possible. No potty training, no big changes, just making sure she knows what to expect every day so hopefully it will help alleviate some of her anxiety issues until we can get therapy going. (Needless to say, our plans of "expanding our family" are on hold until further notice since that would obviously be a huge change in her life. Which, if putting that on hold makes her life easier and we can help her, I'm okay with that.)

She's got a long way to go, but we're going to do everything that we can to help her!

This must be so difficult for you. Best if luck getting her the treatment she deserves. Remember the squeaky wheel gets the grease.

Oh, yes to this. My cousin has a special needs child and she has had to learn to open her mouth and say something when she doesn't think he is getting the care he needs. I don't know about you but I'm completely non-confrontational so that part would be hard for me.

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kellienw335 wrote: »

raelynnsmama52512 wrote: »

Well, now that I'm a little calmer, I think I can update everyone on Raelynn's situation. (( Cliff noting what the doctor said and it's a bit long. ))

-She has been officially and definitely diagnosed with SPD and Anxiety.

-The only treatment for her SPD and (at her age) Anxiety is occupational and behavioral therapy. Unfortunately, we can't afford the therapy, so that can't happen until we get approved for TEFRA (secondary Medicaid for special needs and insurance), but:

-She is being referred to ChildFind (services through the school district), but the county/district we live in is notoriously difficult for getting kids in. We'll have to see what they tell us.

-Doctor also gave us information on some community resources that may be available for us, just depends on if there is anything in Laurens County.

-She scored an 81 on the tests they did yesterday, which puts her right below "average" for her age and development, but the score for "average" runs between an 85-115 (low average-high average) so according to that she's just below which could mean she will be denied TEFRA. Doctor did tell me to be prepared to file an appeal should that happen and she will help us with it.

-She's been having issues with going to sleep for a while now, like fighting sleep and crying at bedtime, and waking up multiple times in a night so we have to start her on melatonin 2 hours before bedtime, because she's so wound up she can't go to sleep (SPD effect). We also have to start her on a fiber regimen, because she has a terrible habit of holding poops (major SPD problem).

-Basically, we have to keep her life as routine and rigid as possible. No potty training, no big changes, just making sure she knows what to expect every day so hopefully it will help alleviate some of her anxiety issues until we can get therapy going. (Needless to say, our plans of "expanding our family" are on hold until further notice since that would obviously be a huge change in her life. Which, if putting that on hold makes her life easier and we can help her, I'm okay with that.)

She's got a long way to go, but we're going to do everything that we can to help her!

I know you will! Glad you popped in because I was just thinking about you! Hugs and prayers!

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kelly_c_77 wrote: »

@raelynnsmama52512, I'm sorry. Sounds like a lot...and I'm sure you're overwhelmed with all the info and not knowing if you will get the financial help you need. You are a wonderful mother, doing anything and everything that you can for you little girl. It may take some adjusting, but you will figure it out. Routine is good!! Big changes can be scary for anyone. Hang in there and vent in here anytime you need to!
Did you ever get your Doctor's appointment/medication taken care of? Sorry if I missed that part...

Thanks yall! ❤️ you seriously do not know how much better y'all have made me feel!

As far as my doctor's appointment, I had to reschedule for August 5th which was the earliest they had. I'm trying to hang on until then, right now my main concern is Raelynn so that's sort of helped me distract myself.

Susieq_1994 wrote: »

Thanks for the well wishes, everyone. I have to admit that part of the frustration is that I'm really ticked off at myself for getting sick in the first place. I've had this disorder for the better part of three years, and living with a chronic disease long-term means you learn how to manage it well (as I'm sure @Italian_Buju can attest to) or you're doomed. I learned all the little nuances and whispers of my body and when to stop and take it easy. But after a six month respite from any sort of flares, I got overconfident and stopped paying attention.

In hindsight, as an ill person, I KNEW and still know that I'm not capable of 60 minutes of stationary bike PLUS 36 flights of stairs PLUS a one hour walk, especially not when I'm fasting, which makes me much more prone to weakness. But I did that TWO DAYS IN A ROW without even thinking about it. So this flare up is all my stupid fault, and I'm pretty mad at me. I'm also mad at my body for not being healthy, which is a common resentment I have that always comes to the fore when I get sick. Stupid body, stupid me, stupid everything.

FroggyBug wrote: »

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raelynnsmama52512 wrote: »

kecmw25 wrote: »

raelynnsmama52512 wrote: »

Well, now that I'm a little calmer, I think I can update everyone on Raelynn's situation. (( Cliff noting what the doctor said and it's a bit long. ))

-She has been officially and definitely diagnosed with SPD and Anxiety.

-The only treatment for her SPD and (at her age) Anxiety is occupational and behavioral therapy. Unfortunately, we can't afford the therapy, so that can't happen until we get approved for TEFRA (secondary Medicaid for special needs and insurance), but:

-She is being referred to ChildFind (services through the school district), but the county/district we live in is notoriously difficult for getting kids in. We'll have to see what they tell us.

-Doctor also gave us information on some community resources that may be available for us, just depends on if there is anything in Laurens County.

-She scored an 81 on the tests they did yesterday, which puts her right below "average" for her age and development, but the score for "average" runs between an 85-115 (low average-high average) so according to that she's just below which could mean she will be denied TEFRA. Doctor did tell me to be prepared to file an appeal should that happen and she will help us with it.

-She's been having issues with going to sleep for a while now, like fighting sleep and crying at bedtime, and waking up multiple times in a night so we have to start her on melatonin 2 hours before bedtime, because she's so wound up she can't go to sleep (SPD effect). We also have to start her on a fiber regimen, because she has a terrible habit of holding poops (major SPD problem).

-Basically, we have to keep her life as routine and rigid as possible. No potty training, no big changes, just making sure she knows what to expect every day so hopefully it will help alleviate some of her anxiety issues until we can get therapy going. (Needless to say, our plans of "expanding our family" are on hold until further notice since that would obviously be a huge change in her life. Which, if putting that on hold makes her life easier and we can help her, I'm okay with that.)

She's got a long way to go, but we're going to do everything that we can to help her!

Hang in there Mommy!! This sounds like a lot to deal with and I'm sure you're doing/going to do great but don't forget to take care of yourself too!! (((hugs)))

kecmw25 wrote: »

pofoster21 wrote: »

raelynnsmama52512 wrote: »

Well, now that I'm a little calmer, I think I can update everyone on Raelynn's situation. (( Cliff noting what the doctor said and it's a bit long. ))

-She has been officially and definitely diagnosed with SPD and Anxiety.

-The only treatment for her SPD and (at her age) Anxiety is occupational and behavioral therapy. Unfortunately, we can't afford the therapy, so that can't happen until we get approved for TEFRA (secondary Medicaid for special needs and insurance), but:

-She is being referred to ChildFind (services through the school district), but the county/district we live in is notoriously difficult for getting kids in. We'll have to see what they tell us.

-Doctor also gave us information on some community resources that may be available for us, just depends on if there is anything in Laurens County.

-She scored an 81 on the tests they did yesterday, which puts her right below "average" for her age and development, but the score for "average" runs between an 85-115 (low average-high average) so according to that she's just below which could mean she will be denied TEFRA. Doctor did tell me to be prepared to file an appeal should that happen and she will help us with it.

-She's been having issues with going to sleep for a while now, like fighting sleep and crying at bedtime, and waking up multiple times in a night so we have to start her on melatonin 2 hours before bedtime, because she's so wound up she can't go to sleep (SPD effect). We also have to start her on a fiber regimen, because she has a terrible habit of holding poops (major SPD problem).

-Basically, we have to keep her life as routine and rigid as possible. No potty training, no big changes, just making sure she knows what to expect every day so hopefully it will help alleviate some of her anxiety issues until we can get therapy going. (Needless to say, our plans of "expanding our family" are on hold until further notice since that would obviously be a huge change in her life. Which, if putting that on hold makes her life easier and we can help her, I'm okay with that.)

She's got a long way to go, but we're going to do everything that we can to help her!

This must be so difficult for you. Best if luck getting her the treatment she deserves. Remember the squeaky wheel gets the grease.

Oh, yes to this. My cousin has a special needs child and she has had to learn to open her mouth and say something when she doesn't think he is getting the care he needs. I don't know about you but I'm completely non-confrontational so that part would be hard for me.

kellienw335 wrote: »

raelynnsmama52512 wrote: »

Well, now that I'm a little calmer, I think I can update everyone on Raelynn's situation. (( Cliff noting what the doctor said and it's a bit long. ))

-She has been officially and definitely diagnosed with SPD and Anxiety.

-The only treatment for her SPD and (at her age) Anxiety is occupational and behavioral therapy. Unfortunately, we can't afford the therapy, so that can't happen until we get approved for TEFRA (secondary Medicaid for special needs and insurance), but:

-She is being referred to ChildFind (services through the school district), but the county/district we live in is notoriously difficult for getting kids in. We'll have to see what they tell us.

-Doctor also gave us information on some community resources that may be available for us, just depends on if there is anything in Laurens County.

-She scored an 81 on the tests they did yesterday, which puts her right below "average" for her age and development, but the score for "average" runs between an 85-115 (low average-high average) so according to that she's just below which could mean she will be denied TEFRA. Doctor did tell me to be prepared to file an appeal should that happen and she will help us with it.

-She's been having issues with going to sleep for a while now, like fighting sleep and crying at bedtime, and waking up multiple times in a night so we have to start her on melatonin 2 hours before bedtime, because she's so wound up she can't go to sleep (SPD effect). We also have to start her on a fiber regimen, because she has a terrible habit of holding poops (major SPD problem).

-Basically, we have to keep her life as routine and rigid as possible. No potty training, no big changes, just making sure she knows what to expect every day so hopefully it will help alleviate some of her anxiety issues until we can get therapy going. (Needless to say, our plans of "expanding our family" are on hold until further notice since that would obviously be a huge change in her life. Which, if putting that on hold makes her life easier and we can help her, I'm okay with that.)

She's got a long way to go, but we're going to do everything that we can to help her!

I know you will! Glad you popped in because I was just thinking about you! Hugs and prayers!

kelly_c_77 wrote: »

@raelynnsmama52512, I'm sorry. Sounds like a lot...and I'm sure you're overwhelmed with all the info and not knowing if you will get the financial help you need. You are a wonderful mother, doing anything and everything that you can for you little girl. It may take some adjusting, but you will figure it out. Routine is good!! Big changes can be scary for anyone. Hang in there and vent in here anytime you need to!
Did you ever get your Doctor's appointment/medication taken care of? Sorry if I missed that part...

Thanks yall! ❤️ you seriously do not know how much better y'all have made me feel!

As far as my doctor's appointment, I had to reschedule for August 5th which was the earliest they had. I'm trying to hang on until then, right now my main concern is Raelynn so that's sort of helped me distract myself.

Good luck with everything. Take care of yourself and Raelynn.

kellyjellybellyjelly wrote: »

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AngryViking1970 wrote: »

LBuehrle8 wrote: »

kellyjellybellyjelly wrote: »

LBuehrle8 wrote: »

Kalici wrote: »

pofoster21 wrote: »

hnsaunde wrote: »

May not be appropriate for @Susieq_1994!

Confession: I found out last night that a friend I used to work with has just been charged with second-degree murder of his wife, who has been missing since November. I'm having a hard time and am absolutely shocked, and still don't really believe it, even though the police quotes say he's been concealing the body at his home for the past 8 months. It just doesn't seem to compute at all against the person I remember.

This is just horrible. How do people do that? How do people not SMELL the decaying body?

They do smell it and they end up telling the police later that they felt bad for the guy or didn't really think anything of it because he is so nice! Like what happened with John Wayne Gacy.

Ahhh don't get me started on JWG!

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dorothea_Puente

This lady was an older serial killer & she basically had a room in her house that they dubbed the killing room. She would board people that had mental, drug, or other issues & then steal their social security. Whenever they would figure out what she was doing she would murder them & then have the other tenants basically do "yard work" which more or less was graves for bodies.

I've seen a few specials on her! She's been on a few different shows on the Investigation Discovery channel! People are insane!

Yes. And this may have come up before, but I love ID. It's my "home alone" channel because my husband thinks it's creepy. LOL

I love the ID Channel. My stepdad always tells my mom that she watches it so she can learn how to murder him. The one day I had it on & my dog was sitting there watching it & I couldn't help but think that she'll murder me in my sleep.

It would appear on an episode Cold Case Files: The Murderous Dog

LBuehrle8 wrote: »

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kellienw335 wrote: »

Patting myself on the back this afternoon. Went out for lunch with friends and looked up calories on a couple things and decided what I was going to have...which I've done in the past and then still not ordered the predetermined meal. I ordered the fajitas and soup combo and didn't eat the tortillas so probably about 650ish calories!!

Awesome will power! Way to go! And by the way- I just got an email my new jawbone is being delivered- hopefully I'll have it in the next couple days!

LBuehrle8 wrote: »

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crosbylee wrote: »

kecmw25 wrote: »

crosbylee wrote: »

MoHousdon wrote: »

xLoveLikeWinterx wrote: »

kelly_c_77 wrote: »

lilaclovebird wrote: »

Coastalpath wrote: »

This is long so don't expect people to read it - just need to get it out!

Like a lot of other posters here I am going through lots of life stresses at the moment and the last few days have felt very sad, numb and unmotivated. I am ever so slightly eating my feelings 'grief bacon' but am logging it all so I can see it in black and white. My confession today is that I am fed up with never feeling as though I am allowed to be stressed or upset. Work, home, health are all suffering at the moment, but I am just expected to suck it up. If one more person says to me 'it could be worse' I might scream. I am silently screaming and unfortunately the pain is beginning to show on my face. I know things could be worse, just doesn't mean that because someone somewhere has it worse than me that I just have to 'be fine' all the time.

Dealing with mixed emotions is so hard - so happy for friends and loved ones who have fantastic things happening, mixed with my grief and sadness for what I am secretly going through. Not wanting to see friends because I don't want to make them miserable mixed with worrying I am not being a good friend by seeing them and sharing in their joys. Or, worse, that I am making them feel guilty for being happy.

Feels better to 'get it out' but I am so sad at the moment and I just wonder when bad things will stop happening!

Your feelings are valid. What you are going through is real and it is difficult for you. We understand and I am sure we have all been there at some point. You ARE allowed to feel this way and you ARE allowed to vent.

Yup. This! Hugs to you.

Coastal (responding to the first post since I never saw it) I feel the same. I pretty much feel like I'm drowning. I'm expected to be the rock for everyone, and most of the time I stoically am. But times like right now, I just want to scream and cry and throw a fit. I want someone to comfort ME and no one is. I'm supposed to hold it together and do 1,000 different things well every day, without fail or exception.

I joke with people a lot that it sucks to be me, because I don't get a "down day", but it's true. I'm expected to be on point 24/7 and I'm struggling. I get the "count your blessings" and "it could be worse" a LOT. Yes, it could be. In the scheme of things, what bothers me could be construed as petty. It doesn't mean it hurts less or I'm less upset. I am grateful for what I have, but aren't I also allowed to be upset too?!

Warning- the below will make me sound like an ungrateful brat. I know this, but they are MY feelings. I'm working on processing them, but it takes time.

I found out on Saturday that good friends of ours (who have 2 boys about the same age as us) are wanting a 3rd. They want to try for a girl. They previously said they were done but the DH changed his mind. I went upstairs and cried. I have wanted 3 kids since I was little. DH said no, 2 was all he could take. He got a vasectomy last Nov so there will only be 2. I agreed because I don't believe in forcing someone to have more kids if they don't want to. I'm not the only one involved in the decision. DH also swore we could look into adopting, which helped ease my feelings about the V.

I have regretted it EVERY DAY since. When I see parents out with 3 or more kids, I'm envious. If one or more is a girl, I am so jealous. I want a daughter. I always have. I love my boys so much, but there is a part of me that will always hurt because I wanted a girl. Both times, the u/s tech told me they were girls and I was blissful for a few weeks until told they were boys. They will never know. I will NEVER tell them they aren't "enough" for me, because they are. I am grateful they are both here and healthy and I would NOT trade them for anything, but I feel a twinge every time I look at a girl or girl baby. DH has also now decided he doesn't want to adopt, so I feel a bit of a pang of "bait and switch" sometimes when I think about it. Mostly I want 3 kids, but not gonna lie, a girl would be awesome.

I feel so alone, because DH is d-o-n-e. 2 is enough for him, he doesn't remotely want a 3rd. Talking to him about it doesn't help, because he has a hard time sympathizing with me. Ok, so he joked around and said I could get a dog to "mother". I agreed. Now last night he is reneging and saying "well, we can get a dog when we get x, y, and z done around the house". This will literally be YEARS. He knows this. Bait and switch #2.

He also said I could look into getting a new car within the month. So I've been plotting out savings, trade-in value, etc. This past weekend he decided nope, my Jeep runs fine for now and maybe we'll think about it in 6 months. Bait and switch #3.

I'm frustrated, I'm sad, I feel like everything I want always comes last after everyone else, and yes I know this is all first world problems, but right now it's rough. On top of it, I'm dieting strictly, so I think I'm just in a funk and crabby from that too. It's the one thing I feel like I'm succeeding at, though, so I don't want to give it up. I have 10.5 lb to go. I'm SO close. I just want to accomplish Something, ya know?

*ok, sorry for the pathetic vent. Carry on*

I'm sorry, that must be tough.

Mr. Mo has wanted to have another kid pretty much since Rachael was born. I never wanted to have kids (didn't have the best childhood) when we got married, so having one was more than enough for me. Plus, I was in labor for 27 hours and still ended up having an emergency C-section. The thought of having to go through that again, was too much for me.

While we were on vacation, he asked me why we never had another kid because it makes him sad when he sees a family with a couple kids strolling down the beach or sitting together at a restaurant. I didn't really have a great answer besides the ones mentioned above, and I feel guilty for not having more of his babies (we make beautiful kids ). Now, we're both in our late 30's and as far as I'm concerned, that ship has sailed, especially with all the SD drama. But I still feel bad for him, but not bad enough to want to have another kid.

When I married my husband, I had one son and he had three daughters. We never thought of having kids and felt we had enough. I got a dog for our first anniversary; she was our kid . Well fast forward a few years and surprise! at 39 I was pregnant. We weren't trying or trying to avoid it, just happened. I had her after I turned 40. I knew I was done after that, so got that factory shut down. You never know. We love her just as much as any of the others and don't regret a minute of it. After that, his oldest daughter, who is in her 20's, had a little girl about 15 months after we had Olivia. Crazy stuff.

ETA: I put up a pic of little bit on the random pics thread.

I got a puppy for our 1st anniversary too! And I had a baby 1 month after my 40th birthday. We were definitely trying tho. I'm pretty sure we're done. My husband is content with just one but I think his reasoning has to do with how much daycare costs. I would love to have another but I think my age is a problem. Of course the doctor says it's still possible.

Nowadays we seem to be having kids later in life. Lots of OBs treat us the same as a younger ladies, as long as there are no known genetic or physical issues. I just don't have the energy plus I want to be able to do the couples only vacation before I retire. I am already pushing that one!

I'm 29 and no where near being married or having kids so I'm sure I'll join the group of being an "older" lady when having children...whatevs! It seems to be the smarter thing to do anyhow with the cost of living so outrageous these days!

kellienw335 wrote: »

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pofoster21 wrote: »

kellienw335 wrote: »

@pofoster21 - Love the shoes, although not sure how you walk in those! I can't wait until I drop some more weight so I can wear cute shoes again. I wear tennis shoes to work at the moment. It helps me to get in more steps. Also, we have a program that awards leave time every quarter if you get a certain number of minutes of exercise every month. Totally worth it!

Platforms. I keep telling you ladies this. Seriously. Try them.

That's what I wore when I was thinner, but seriously I wear a size 12 and it's hard to find shoes! And I can't buy them online because I have to make sure they don't hurt my feet and I am terrible about returns! There are only two stores near me that sell dress shoes in my size, Payless and Shoe Carnival. I always have to buy tennis shoes in men's sizes because I need good shoes to workout. Anyone else with big feet?

FluffySandwich wrote: »

I just ate a banana and I thought about back when I spent some time in a hospital. There was a girl who sat next to me and started ranting about the proper way to eat a banana. She said that her mom and sister peeled back the banana and ate it while it still sat in the rest of the peel. She claimed to have never seen anyone else do it like that.... and all I could think was ''Wait... you REMOVE the whole banana before eating it???'' I had never seen her way and she had never seen mine.

She thought this was crazy:


Most people eat their bananas like this, right?

FluffySandwich wrote: »

I just ate a banana and I thought about back when I spent some time in a hospital. There was a girl who sat next to me and started ranting about the proper way to eat a banana. She said that her mom and sister peeled back the banana and ate it while it still sat in the rest of the peel. She claimed to have never seen anyone else do it like that.... and all I could think was ''Wait... you REMOVE the whole banana before eating it???'' I had never seen her way and she had never seen mine.

She thought this was crazy:


Most people eat their bananas like this, right?

kellienw335 wrote: »

Patting myself on the back this afternoon. Went out for lunch with friends and looked up calories on a couple things and decided what I was going to have...which I've done in the past and then still not ordered the predetermined meal. I ordered the fajitas and soup combo and didn't eat the tortillas so probably about 650ish calories!!

kellyjellybellyjelly wrote: »

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Susieq_1994 wrote: »

ShibaEars wrote: »

Glinda1971 wrote: »

So confession time:

I've been closing my diary everyday while it looks good and then mindlessly stuffing extra food in my face that I don't want or need.

I've only lost 0.6 of a lb in 2 weeks so I know that has to stop.

I apologize to everyone who has been liking the diary of lies. The only goal I'm setting today is to honestly log everything I stuff in my face.

ETA: just posted that as my status too. I'm actually ashamed of myself.

I've done this too. I log my food and I'm all pleased with myself for such a great day. Then I find myself in the kitchen snacking. I swear sometimes it feels like I'm doing a math equation - I like to successfully complete it with my macros/calories all nice & pretty, but then I seem to forget I actually have to EAT the food I've logged (and only that food).

Yup, me too. Except that I usually do it more when my diary isn't filled out fully--if I can't pre-log my day, it tends to fall to pieces. While undiagnosed, I do have a lot of OCD-like symptoms, and not knowing exactly what I'm supposed to eat is quite a stressful thing for me. Along with my all-or-nothing attitude, I have to pre-log or I'm doomed.

Susie I am the same way! I had one of those days on Monday.