Confession Time! ((ABSOLUTELY NO JUDGEMENT))
Replies
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kellienw335 wrote: »krissyreminisce wrote: »I feel so woefully behind that there was no way I'd every catch up.
I ended up with some urinary infection (which after straight cranberry juice (like 7g of sugar straight) and antibiotics, I think I've managed to kick it!
Also, I went to my brother-in-law's birthday party which was a bonfire and managed to get drunk off of two drinks. I had to drink A LOT of water and eat what I could to sober up (which I did) because I was the DD. I drove everyone home, got his support with my anorexia, and then made the hour drive home.
After four hours of sleep I ran a 10k (came in FIRST in my age group).
I did struggle this week for a couple of days with body image and was spiraling (I kept leaving the gym crying). But I think I'm needing more rest, because after a good night's sleep, I was in a better space.
Today I wore a swimsuit for the first time in around four years and a two piece since I was like, 2? lol. It's a tankini, but I'm looking for a monokini. It felt good to swim again.
I was wondering what happened to you!! Glad you're ok and were feeling good enough to wear a tankini!!! And congratulations on the race!
Thanks! And today was the first time in two weeks that I was able to weigh myself at my normal time after eating my regular food. Mind, I haven't been tracking at all (except my exercise) and only weighing some food so I'm consistent. I gained no weight and am actually sitting at 106. So I hope I can keep this up, though that still puts me underweight.
I'm a work in progress. One of the trainers at my gym told me she noticed I've been losing muscle.
I'm trying to eat more protein, and I feel like I'm eating a lot of food. But maybe I'm not. 
I'll keep coming in with updates.
And @Francl27, the chocolate Halo Top is DELICIOUS!0 -
So I got into a car accident on Friday and damaged my car to where I can't legally drive it. Both the girl and I are ok and we exchanged information and no damage to either of us but, damn. I didn't need this. 300 deductible as well for the shop
To top it off I talked to my manager about not being able to get to work til Thursday when my car gets back from the shop and she said she could give me the days off.
Well come schedule time, guess what days she put me working?? I'm like did you forget or what? Ugh. Told her unless someone picks me up I can't get there and I have no friends here. Not my week. I have several doubles this week too so it'll be stress.
I also ate an entire cookies and cream gelato pint from taleni. It was delicious, but I was self medicating with food. Whoops, but it was good.
GOD I NEED A VACATION. / endrant0 -
raelynnsmama52512 wrote: »Italian_Buju wrote: »kellienw335 wrote: »CountessKitteh wrote: »I have two updates!
1) My Wegmans does carry the Halo Top Vanilla, Chocolate, and Lemon Cake. They were ALL sold out (they only got a very small amount in) so I shall have to check back.
2) I PASSED MY EXAM!!!!!!!!!!
Checking in on a Sunday night because I have actual work to do this week, but so glad to hear this! How's your FIL?
And I'm sure this has already been covered, but why is @JPW1990 in jail?
Can someone PLEASE explain what this jail thing is, what is means?
Jail means they've violated some forum guideline(s) if I remember right. Don't quote me on that, though.
But how do you know? I looked at JPW1990's photo, and it didn't look any different.....didn't someone say it was from their profile photo??
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thewritingviolinst1 wrote: »My weight loss journey is really scary for me. I have been in recovery from anorexia and bulimia for about a year. I was sick and without help for seven years. Now as I try to get back down to an appropriate weight for my height, I'm really fighting urges to restrict/purge. I haven't so far, yet! Woo!
Good job! I'm glad you're doing so well now. Keep it up!
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pearso21123 wrote: »On Friday, my 13-year-old daughter told me that she's been depressed for over a year and wanted to go see a therapist. This was after a major meltdown over what should have been a minor incident. We'd noticed she's been withdrawn and has been spending a lot of time in her room, but thought it was just typical teenage moodiness. I'll be calling the dr. first thing tomorrow, but have also been doing some research and trying to find things to do on our end. This isn't something I've ever dealt with before. One of the things that was recommended was getting her out of her isolation, as well as exercise. I brought her with me to work today (I work at a university library). She's currently out collecting books (she loves to read) and hitting the Cyber Cafe. She seems very happy today. I also spoke to her about joining a gym together, at least for the summer, and she was very receptive to the idea. So, we'll be going to the YMCA tomorrow to check it out. I'm a little scared to join a gym, as I don't like working out in front of people. But, I'm willing to do it for her. She's excited that they might have a pool. I told her there's no way I'm wearing a bathing suit in public, but she's welcome to swim without me. Anyway, this isn't really a confession, but I needed to get this off my chest. Thanks for listening.
That is a really tough thing to go through, but I see a silver lining here. First your daughter admitted she needed help. That is huge. Second your daughter felt comfortable enough to tell you that she needed help. Third you listened, took what she said on board and are doing things to help her. That is wonderful. I'm wishing you both the best.
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Thanks for your kind comments, guys
I just dug out a dress of mine from last year and put it on to see if it was fit to bring to Punta Cana. I looked at myself in the mirror and felt ok... but I always feel like mirrors lie to me.
I got out my new camera and took a VIDEO OF MYSELF standing in my dress to see what it looked like on camera. I have to say I'm pretty horrified by how terrible my arms look. Maybe with a tan my scars and such won't be as visible... man, those arms!! 
EDIT: NO. This is bad. I posted this and I told myself I need to stop hating on myself. So, to take back some damage.... I really like my dimples
EDIT2: I don't want to bring my glasses to the beach to get them lost or stolen while I'm swimming... and I don't wear contacts, so it looks like I might have a partially blind trip.0 -
@Tubbs216 I can very much relate to the anemia / heavy period issue. At one point I had lost so much blood I passed out and the doctors put me on steriods and wanted to give me a transfusion. (I was 17 years old). It took awhile to build up the iron so I was ok. I also (seperately and years later) have been a different type of anemic realating to B-12 where I had Vitamin B shots monthly for awhile. So please stay on top of it with her and ugh, I'm sorry she's dealing with it. It can drain so much energy from a person.0
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ddrhellbunny wrote: »So I got into a car accident on Friday and damaged my car to where I can't legally drive it. Both the girl and I are ok and we exchanged information and no damage to either of us but, damn. I didn't need this. 300 deductible as well for the shop
To top it off I talked to my manager about not being able to get to work til Thursday when my car gets back from the shop and she said she could give me the days off.
Well come schedule time, guess what days she put me working?? I'm like did you forget or what? Ugh. Told her unless someone picks me up I can't get there and I have no friends here. Not my week. I have several doubles this week too so it'll be stress.
I also ate an entire cookies and cream gelato pint from taleni. It was delicious, but I was self medicating with food. Whoops, but it was good.
GOD I NEED A VACATION. / endrant
It is a huge mess but what a relief that there is no injury! I'm glad you are safe and well.0 -
FluffySandwich wrote: »Thanks for your kind comments, guys
I just dug out a dress of mine from last year and put it on to see if it was fit to bring to Punta Cana. I looked at myself in the mirror and felt ok... but I always feel like mirrors lie to me. I got out my new camera and took a VIDEO OF MYSELF standing in my dress to see what it looked like on camera. I have to say I'm pretty horrified by how terrible my arms look. Maybe with a tan my scars and such won't be as visible... man, those arms!!
EDIT: NO. This is bad. I posted this and I told myself I need to stop hating on myself. So, to take back some damage.... I really like my dimples
EDIT2: I don't want to bring my glasses to the beach to get them lost or stolen while I'm swimming... and I don't wear contacts, so it looks like I might have a partially blind trip.
I bet you are lovely! Yes to stop hating on yourself. Stop it right now! (Stamping foot with hand on my hips!) Have a wonderful trip!
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pearso21123 wrote: »On Friday, my 13-year-old daughter told me that she's been depressed for over a year and wanted to go see a therapist. This was after a major meltdown over what should have been a minor incident. We'd noticed she's been withdrawn and has been spending a lot of time in her room, but thought it was just typical teenage moodiness. I'll be calling the dr. first thing tomorrow, but have also been doing some research and trying to find things to do on our end. This isn't something I've ever dealt with before. One of the things that was recommended was getting her out of her isolation, as well as exercise. I brought her with me to work today (I work at a university library). She's currently out collecting books (she loves to read) and hitting the Cyber Cafe. She seems very happy today. I also spoke to her about joining a gym together, at least for the summer, and she was very receptive to the idea. So, we'll be going to the YMCA tomorrow to check it out. I'm a little scared to join a gym, as I don't like working out in front of people. But, I'm willing to do it for her. She's excited that they might have a pool. I told her there's no way I'm wearing a bathing suit in public, but she's welcome to swim without me. Anyway, this isn't really a confession, but I needed to get this off my chest. Thanks for listening.
That is a really tough thing to go through, but I see a silver lining here. First your daughter admitted she needed help. That is huge. Second your daughter felt comfortable enough to tell you that she needed help. Third you listened, took what she said on board and are doing things to help her. That is wonderful. I'm wishing you both the best.
Nicely put and I agree with it all.0 -
@Susieq_1994 I enjoyed your book, nicely done. It was fascinating for me to get a glimpse into another culture through a story like this. Thank you for sharing! I have not made hummus yet. I did buy a little clove of garlic and some fresh lemon. I had cooked the chickpeas and the frozen them. They are thawing in my refridgerator. I have tahini. I'm all set to make it soon. I did (with my daughter) make a quinoa tabouleh today that was very tasty! It might be another day before I have time, though, we're going out to Ethiopean food tomorrow.0
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krissyreminisce wrote: »kellienw335 wrote: »krissyreminisce wrote: »I feel so woefully behind that there was no way I'd every catch up.
I ended up with some urinary infection (which after straight cranberry juice (like 7g of sugar straight) and antibiotics, I think I've managed to kick it!
Also, I went to my brother-in-law's birthday party which was a bonfire and managed to get drunk off of two drinks. I had to drink A LOT of water and eat what I could to sober up (which I did) because I was the DD. I drove everyone home, got his support with my anorexia, and then made the hour drive home.
After four hours of sleep I ran a 10k (came in FIRST in my age group).
I did struggle this week for a couple of days with body image and was spiraling (I kept leaving the gym crying). But I think I'm needing more rest, because after a good night's sleep, I was in a better space.
Today I wore a swimsuit for the first time in around four years and a two piece since I was like, 2? lol. It's a tankini, but I'm looking for a monokini. It felt good to swim again.
I was wondering what happened to you!! Glad you're ok and were feeling good enough to wear a tankini!!! And congratulations on the race!
Thanks! And today was the first time in two weeks that I was able to weigh myself at my normal time after eating my regular food. Mind, I haven't been tracking at all (except my exercise) and only weighing some food so I'm consistent. I gained no weight and am actually sitting at 106. So I hope I can keep this up, though that still puts me underweight.
I'm a work in progress. One of the trainers at my gym told me she noticed I've been losing muscle. I'm trying to eat more protein, and I feel like I'm eating a lot of food. But maybe I'm not.
I'll keep coming in with updates.
And @Francl27, the chocolate Halo Top is DELICIOUS!
You sound good. Keep up the good work. You are doing well and moving forward each time you feel you are struggling. I am cheering you on!!
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FluffySandwich wrote: »Thanks for your kind comments, guys
I just dug out a dress of mine from last year and put it on to see if it was fit to bring to Punta Cana. I looked at myself in the mirror and felt ok... but I always feel like mirrors lie to me. I got out my new camera and took a VIDEO OF MYSELF standing in my dress to see what it looked like on camera. I have to say I'm pretty horrified by how terrible my arms look. Maybe with a tan my scars and such won't be as visible... man, those arms!!
EDIT: NO. This is bad. I posted this and I told myself I need to stop hating on myself. So, to take back some damage.... I really like my dimples
EDIT2: I don't want to bring my glasses to the beach to get them lost or stolen while I'm swimming... and I don't wear contacts, so it looks like I might have a partially blind trip.
No hating on yourself!! No one else will care about your scars or anything else. I used to be really anxious about walking around with my arms and legs visible during the summer, especially when my scars were really vivid and obvious, but the only thing that's happened is a few people coming up to me and being like "you are on this earth for a reason precious gift to the universe beautiful soul blah blee bloo" and someone buying me a pastry. (Actually one of those was with my arms covered up so I'm not sure what was happening with that. Maybe I looked sad?) People are rarely as judgmental of you as you are of yourself. But anyway! Tanning does help. Also lemon juice will bleach them so they might be closer to your normal skin color. bio oil is supposed to be good too, but it's expensive so I've never tried it personally :P
Confession #2: I'm not totally happy about how quickly my scars are fading. I know it's convenient and I don't want people judging me for them, and I don't want it to be an obstacle for getting a job or whatever, but... I put them there so that I would have a record, among other things. Deep cuts and two years later I can barely see them, but they're still there if you look. I want either clear skin or something dramatic dammit.0 -
Urgh, I just made one of those brownie in a mug things and although I didn't eat all of it, I just feel kinda gross0
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pearso21123 wrote: »On Friday, my 13-year-old daughter told me that she's been depressed for over a year and wanted to go see a therapist. This was after a major meltdown over what should have been a minor incident. We'd noticed she's been withdrawn and has been spending a lot of time in her room, but thought it was just typical teenage moodiness. I'll be calling the dr. first thing tomorrow, but have also been doing some research and trying to find things to do on our end. This isn't something I've ever dealt with before. One of the things that was recommended was getting her out of her isolation, as well as exercise. I brought her with me to work today (I work at a university library). She's currently out collecting books (she loves to read) and hitting the Cyber Cafe. She seems very happy today. I also spoke to her about joining a gym together, at least for the summer, and she was very receptive to the idea. So, we'll be going to the YMCA tomorrow to check it out. I'm a little scared to join a gym, as I don't like working out in front of people. But, I'm willing to do it for her. She's excited that they might have a pool. I told her there's no way I'm wearing a bathing suit in public, but she's welcome to swim without me. Anyway, this isn't really a confession, but I needed to get this off my chest. Thanks for listening.
That is a really tough thing to go through, but I see a silver lining here. First your daughter admitted she needed help. That is huge. Second your daughter felt comfortable enough to tell you that she needed help. Third you listened, took what she said on board and are doing things to help her. That is wonderful. I'm wishing you both the best.
This!0 -
kelly_c_77 wrote: »kellyjellybellyjelly wrote: »
Confession - couldn't take my rest day yesterday so I went for my usual 3.5 mile walk, and now my calf still hurts, obviously, but so does my hip. I really can't win. I'm getting too old and getting hurt all over apparently!
I was up at 5am hungry too. Remembered that the tooth fairy was supposed to come (actually, she was supposed to come on Friday night but forgot, silly tooth fairy), so I ended up throwing a $1 bill on my kid's bed as he was sleeping on the floor and I couldn't even find his pillow. But at least I remembered, and I didn't wake him up. He did wonder why the tooth was still there though (he just woke up), so I told him the tooth fairy probably couldn't find it.
Then I was so hungry I ate 600 calories by 6am. Quite safe to say that I will probably not be able to stick to my deficit again today At least I had a good deficit for 5 days.
I have a tough time taking rest days too.
I have built up a great deficit for the week because we are going to a birthday party today and I know I'll overdue it...like I always do at parties. But I don't care. I'm going to enjoy myself and eat everything that I want...and try my best to log when I get home. I just hope I don't go waaaay overboard...we shall see.
Funny stuff about the tooth fairy..we're not at that stage yet..but I think it'll be fun.
Quoting myself to fix my mistake...overdo not overdue.
Anyway, I did really well at the party...but once I got home and my son was in bed and husband still working, I blew it.
Logged everything the best I could. Woke up with a 4 pound increase on the scale (thanks sodium). I'm doing my workout this morning and getting back on track with eating today (hopefully). My problem is that one day of bad eating often turns into 2-3 before I can really be back to healthy eating.
Does anyone else have a problem with multiple days of overeating or do you find you can usually get back on track after just one day?0 -
FluffySandwich wrote: »Thanks for your kind comments, guys
I just dug out a dress of mine from last year and put it on to see if it was fit to bring to Punta Cana. I looked at myself in the mirror and felt ok... but I always feel like mirrors lie to me. I got out my new camera and took a VIDEO OF MYSELF standing in my dress to see what it looked like on camera. I have to say I'm pretty horrified by how terrible my arms look. Maybe with a tan my scars and such won't be as visible... man, those arms!!
EDIT: NO. This is bad. I posted this and I told myself I need to stop hating on myself. So, to take back some damage.... I really like my dimples
EDIT2: I don't want to bring my glasses to the beach to get them lost or stolen while I'm swimming... and I don't wear contacts, so it looks like I might have a partially blind trip.
I'm sure you look amazing in the dress. I'll be eagerly awaiting finding out how it all was as I'm also going to Punta Cana. I'm glad you brought up the tipping thing as we're all inclusive too and I hadn't really thought about it. I didn't even really know tipping housekeeping was a thing until part way through my time working in the US when one of my American colleagues told me.
I'll probably also be half blind on my trip for the same reasons.0 -
FluffySandwich wrote: »I was struggling with depression during my teenage years as well, but I don't think my mom was able to handle it very well. The thing is, I didn't think I was depressed at all (now that I look back, it seems obvious), and I was placed into a hospital for a week to get therapy and to monitor me so I wouldn't harm myself. It was extremely hurtful, mostly because I thought I was just going in for a therapy session but I had been lied to. They rushed my mom out and basically locked me in the hospital. I screamed and cried, and some grumpy woman came in and demanded I take my clothes off so she could search me for ''weapons'' and stuff. It was embarrassing and felt like I was being put in jail. I remember smiling at one of the counselors and being told ''What's so funny??? Wipe that smirk off your face.'' Dude, I was just being nice.
Since then my mom has apologized many times, and I guess I can't really blame her behavior since she was genuinely worried about me. Still, that whole experience was just surreal.
Wow, that sounds really scary. I'm so sorry that happened to you! I'm glad your mom has since apologized..I'm sure she had no idea it would be like that..and of course she was just trying to get you some help.
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It's past 5 AM and I'm still awake. I might as well just not go to sleep tonight. I've been exhausted since like 9 PM but nope no sleep for me. Wheeeeeee.e0
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I just can't keep up with this thread over the weekends! Watch out for random quoting of ancient posts coming your way!0
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pearso21123 wrote: »On Friday, my 13-year-old daughter told me that she's been depressed for over a year and wanted to go see a therapist. This was after a major meltdown over what should have been a minor incident. We'd noticed she's been withdrawn and has been spending a lot of time in her room, but thought it was just typical teenage moodiness. I'll be calling the dr. first thing tomorrow, but have also been doing some research and trying to find things to do on our end. This isn't something I've ever dealt with before. One of the things that was recommended was getting her out of her isolation, as well as exercise. I brought her with me to work today (I work at a university library). She's currently out collecting books (she loves to read) and hitting the Cyber Cafe. She seems very happy today. I also spoke to her about joining a gym together, at least for the summer, and she was very receptive to the idea. So, we'll be going to the YMCA tomorrow to check it out. I'm a little scared to join a gym, as I don't like working out in front of people. But, I'm willing to do it for her. She's excited that they might have a pool. I told her there's no way I'm wearing a bathing suit in public, but she's welcome to swim without me. Anyway, this isn't really a confession, but I needed to get this off my chest. Thanks for listening.
Good for you for listening and helping! My mom was the same when my depression scared me enough to tell her about it.
@FluffySandwich I'm sorry you went through that!!0 -
So I'm only going to work for about an hour and a half today. I have an abscessed tooth to the point where half my face is swollen.
Since I don't have a dentist or a doctor at the moment, I guess it's hours in emergency for me this morning. Since all the walk ins require you to be a patient of their Clinic.0 -
I've had 3 coffees this week. I did log themand manage not to go over my calories but I have gone way over my sugar limit0
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xMrBunglex wrote: »berlynnwall wrote: »Glinda1971 wrote: »
Myberlynnwall wrote: »[="Francl27;32842296"]I confess that after hearing everyone butchering my name, I just decided to use very common and traditional names for my kids. And also considered changing my name when I got my US citizenship a year ago... just decided against it because I didn't want more paperwork.
Even though I had a popular name, I named my kids traditional names. I tried not to give them a top 10 name like mine, but I did choose regular names with regular spellings. I 100% don't judge what other parents do. I feel like I have to say that. Not judgmental!
Also, I don't plan to change my last name since being married. My oldest has my last name and I feel like it would be pretty crappy to leave him as the only one with that name. Also, I don't care about that particular tradition and my husband doesn't care either. We know we are married.
My husband would love if I change mine, but I've had this last name for 43 years. The different last name is just not me.
If that makes sense.
It makes sense to me!
My wife kept her last name too. Makes sense, that's who I fell in love with!
Nice! True too
I took on my husband's name, but I confess a significant part of this was because people always misspell my maiden name, whereas his is very phonetic and I now enjoy not having to constantly spell my name out. I'm so romantic practical, it's painful!0 -
Glinda1971 wrote: »So I'm only going to work for about an hour and a half today. I have an abscessed tooth to the point where half my face is swollen.
Since I don't have a dentist or a doctor at the moment, I guess it's hours in emergency for me this morning. Since all the walk ins require you to be a patient of their Clinic.
Oh that sounds really painful. Good luck getting in quickly!0 -
I'm learning. I was trying to post dog pictures but I'll post one of my hair. I think I officially have waist length hair finally. I change the length and style quite a bit but I've been enjoying it long so I let it grow. I've never been this long or even close before. Now I'm going in for a trim next week as it has been six months since the last time I had it trimmed. I didn't think it could get this long but it did! I had it in a very short bob in 2011. Edit to add, I didn't have or could not access dog pictures here on this ipad.
confession. I'm ridiculously pleased with myself over my hair growing. I But I have little control over my nails. Brittle and dry and break easily so I have to wear them short.
I guess I could add something weight related. I have maintained a 50+ pound weight loss for more than 12 years.
One advantage we ladies of diminutive stature have is our hair looks longer faster! Last year I cut about 10 inches off my hair to donate to a charity that makes wigs for children with cancer and other illnesses which cause hair loss, and I still had shoulder length hair left. I expect I'll grow it back for the next couple of years, and perhaps cut it off in one go to donate again. Gives me a sense of enormous well-being!0 -
confession. I'm ridiculously pleased with myself over my hair growing. .
One advantage we ladies of diminutive stature have is our hair looks longer faster! Last year I cut about 10 inches off my hair to donate to a charity that makes wigs for children with cancer and other illnesses which cause hair loss, and I still had shoulder length hair left. I expect I'll grow it back for the next couple of years, and perhaps cut it off in one go to donate again. Gives me a sense of enormous well-being!0 -
I don't have time to shower after a workout on my lunch hour.
I run the water while I change if there's anyone else in the gym with me, so they fall for the pretence that I am, indeed, showering.
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Woke up and had 9,000 calories left, woohoo. Turns out if your age gets screwed up the calorie adjustment goes bonkers.
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