Confession Time! ((ABSOLUTELY NO JUDGEMENT))

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  • bkhamill
    bkhamill Posts: 1,289 Member
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    I have to add that I think it is NOT selfish at all to realize you do not want children. What is selfish is to have children you do not want, just because you are 'supposed' to, and then treat them as such.

    The whole point of my last post was that I really wanted to be a mother, I do not think my life would be complete without it, but, it is not for everyone, and should not be taken lightly, nor should be taken on because of pressure.

    This made me feel awesome. I don't want kids. I just don't. I donate to children's charities occassionally and I would risk my own life to protect someone else's kid without a second thought*. But having my own is just not something I want.

    *I actually have a problem with going to the grocery store and if a parent walks away from the cart, I will stand next to it until they come back. I know it creeps some people out, but it only takes a SECOND for a kidnapping to happen and I worry about that stuff.

    I've never wanted children. I've always known that, since I was very young. I never played with dollies. I am not maternal in the slightest. I am very lazy. i want to have lie ins, and stay on the sofa drinking coffee, or chuck my passport in my handbag and just go to the airport (i've done that a few times, and once when i took my dog on a ferry to Spain and then drove across it). But generally, I don't like children, don't want to be around them.

    When my younger sister was pregnant, I was really excited to be an Auntie. I planned to do all the cool auntie things, buy loud toys and have trips to the zoo. I was there when my nephew was born and fell in love with him from the first moment.

    Unfortunately, my sister is an oxygen thief and a total waste of space. Social Services were involved all the way along (due to her age) and when my nephew was 6 months old, they removed him from her care and put him in the care of my mum. My mum and I share now share legal custody of him (he's 2 now) and she rarely sees him.

    When i was working in Devon, he lived half the week with my parents and half the week with me. Now i work in London in the week, I drive 200 miles home every Thursday night. I do swimming with him and his class at school on a Friday morning, and he stays with me from Friday to Sunday, when i drive back to London. He is exhausting and I am having to learn patience, which is not easy, particularly when small children don't come naturally. My office/gym room is now a small boy's bedroom, (i was heartbroken to sell my treadmill. i still miss it) all decorated for him and full of toys. We've always bought things in pairs so he has one at grandma's house and one at Auntie's.

    Here's my confession:
    I resent my sister hugely for dropping this burden on me, and my mum. We were in the process of getting ready to emigrate to Spain and now that dream is gone. I have to organise my whole life around supporting my parents and ensuring they get a break, 2 year olds are hard work. My parents already raised 6 of us. My partners and I have to organise our weekends, holidays and social lives to take account of school holidays and having Charlie. I miss the peace and quiet of my house. I miss the tidiness. I'm generally a solitary creature and loved the solitude of my house.

    My mum was also recently diagnosed with skin cancer and will be undergoing a major operation this summer before radiotherapy. The care burden for my nephew, and her while she is bed bound, falls on my dad, who also works. That means i need to be home every weekend to try and lighten that load as much as i can.

    to be clear: I do not resent my nephew in any way. I absolutely adore him, he is my world and my priority. He is the reason i work 200 miles from home (i can earn better money in London, and can afford to ensure he has everything he needs, and nice trips to the zoo etc. He does bring me such joy and happiness and he is the total light of my life.

    But, i cannot help missing my Saturday morning boxing class, or my sunday morning lie in. I miss being able to book a holiday without a thought about money or child care. I resent that i spend 6 hours of my weekend, every weekend, driving. I feel overwhelmed by responsibilities all the time. My whole life has changed, through choices i didn't make. (Not strictly true, because i chose to to fight for custody of him, with my mum, and i promised my mum i would help her and support her). Charlie being fostered/adopted outside of the family was never an option in my mind). And mostly, i feel selfish for these thoughts and resentments.

    everyone always said I would feel different about having kids, if they were my own. I don't think i would. And i was never prepared to risk having a child, just to find out. Thats not fair on the kid. But now I've got one (sort of) and i need to be a parent to him. All I can do is my best. And he will never ever know how i feel about his mother, or the loss of my freedom and independence.

    TL;DR if you know you don't want children, good for you, stick to your guns and don't let the earth mothers try and tell you differently.


    ETA: Charlie was my reason and motivation for starting my weightloss journey in the beginning. I wanted to be able to run around after him and keep up with him. I didn't want him to be ashamed of his fat auntie and have other kids tease him about me. I also do challenges as a way of teaching him that you have to work hard for things, that its the effort that you put in that counts.

    You are a great person! Be proud of who you are, you have earned it!
  • girldownsouth
    girldownsouth Posts: 920 Member
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    JPW1990 wrote: »
    Is anyone a horrible person like me who gets a kick out of STFU, Parents? Here is one themed for our thread: 07oyrze3vksa.jpg

    From this article:
    http://www.mommyish.com/2013/08/26/stfu-parents-how-not-to-mommyjack-your-childfree-friends/4/
    Have you checked out the sanctimommy page on Facebook?! Absolutely hilarious :lol:
    To add, if I were to receive a comment like this, my arm and hand could quite possibly get a workout >:)

    I have, and I love it. For real.

    Some of their posts make my jaw drop lol, like do people really act that way?! Makes me feel better about myself lol

    If you're bored, spend some time at babycenter or cafemom. Never has there been a more wretched hive of scum and villainy.

    If you want a laugh google mumsnet pen!s beaker (spelt right, just wasn't sure if this would * it)
  • Tubbs216
    Tubbs216 Posts: 6,597 Member
    edited May 2015
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    Just_Ceci wrote: »
    I skipped the first 637 pages...

    Confession: I don't eat nearly the calories MFP says I should.

    Not acceptable! ;)

    You have to at least find a random post from somewhere in the middle to quote. LOL
    Haha! Yes, or pick either a) the drowning peanut butter jar in water one or b) eating 2 spoonfuls of chocolate powder.

    Also, Rabbit - why too low cals? How long have you been doing that? Not judging, just concerned.
  • kellienw335
    kellienw335 Posts: 1,745 Member
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    LBuehrle8 wrote: »
    One of my best friends is an only child and she turned out terrific. Very, very intelligent, witty, and mature. I don't think being an only child makes you damaged at all. I do love my siblings, though... even if sometimes I compare myself to my sister and feel inadequate :lol: (she's beautiful and has the most gorgeous singing voice).

    I feel you there- by the way I'm the brunette in my picture- the blonde is my sister. She is GORGEOUS it's not even funny. Love her to death but sometimes get so jealous of her haha. I know what you mean though!

    I don't think it's damaging to only have one kid but I'm one of five and I can't imagine not having tons of siblings they're my best friends <3

    You are gorgeous too!

    Wish I was closer with my siblings. I have two younger brothers. One is in the Army, stationed in Germany, and is married with kids so I don't talk to him very often. The other is a mess and the only time he calls is to ask for money, which I stopped giving to him over ten years ago.
  • bkhamill
    bkhamill Posts: 1,289 Member
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    Lois_1989 wrote: »
    Tubbs216 wrote: »
    Just_Ceci wrote: »
    I'm totally judging all this mint nonsense. Mint and chocolate do not belong together!
    Except here...
    307x00av17gn.jpg

    *drool* I once had the idea to bake brownies by doing the following:

    A. Spread half the brownie batter in the pan
    B. Cover the batter with a single layer of these beauties
    C. Spread the other half of the batter on top
    D. Layer them across the top

    Sadly, when I went to put my idea into action, I couldn't find them at ANY of the supermarkets. Ugh.

    OH MY GOD! You had me, I really want to know what happens. You must do it! I think they are mostly around at Christmas time.

    ......

    I'm doing it. I'm going to hunt them down now and I'm going to do it...

    Do it, do it! I NEED to know how this turns out. ;) I should hunt for them too....

    http://lilluna.com/eggless-cookie-dough/?utm_source=feedburner&amp;utm_medium=email&amp;utm_campaign=Feed:+lilluna/isXQ+(Lil'+Luna+-+All+Things+Good)

    I made this recipe tonight & had 10 grams of it since that's all I could fit in my diary for today haha. Very sweet, but so much better than the mock chickpea dough even though that was still pretty decent.

    When I REALLY want cookie dough, I make the real thing, raw eggs and all. ;) I tried out the mock one when I came across it because I was hoping it would be a lower calorie alternative--It wasn't, though! I could have had 3.5 cookies' worth of real dough for the same amount of calories, and the amount wasn't much more than that would be. And it tasted nothing like cookie dough *sobsob*

    That's some SERIOUSLY amazing willpower. I could never stick to ten grams of cookie dough, whether it fit in my diary or not! ;) I'd probably eat half the dough...

    This may get me judged... I have never understood the fascination with cookie dough! I gotta have my cookies baked - I like them still soft, but need them cooked.
  • Tubbs216
    Tubbs216 Posts: 6,597 Member
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    JPW1990 wrote: »
    Is anyone a horrible person like me who gets a kick out of STFU, Parents? Here is one themed for our thread: 07oyrze3vksa.jpg

    From this article:
    http://www.mommyish.com/2013/08/26/stfu-parents-how-not-to-mommyjack-your-childfree-friends/4/
    Have you checked out the sanctimommy page on Facebook?! Absolutely hilarious :lol:
    To add, if I were to receive a comment like this, my arm and hand could quite possibly get a workout >:)

    I have, and I love it. For real.

    Some of their posts make my jaw drop lol, like do people really act that way?! Makes me feel better about myself lol

    If you're bored, spend some time at babycenter or cafemom. Never has there been a more wretched hive of scum and villainy.

    If you want a laugh google mumsnet pen!s beaker (spelt right, just wasn't sure if this would * it)
    Hahahahhhaa! The things people will ask about. Do they not think about it first???
  • Tubbs216
    Tubbs216 Posts: 6,597 Member
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    bkhamill wrote: »
    Lois_1989 wrote: »
    Tubbs216 wrote: »
    Just_Ceci wrote: »
    I'm totally judging all this mint nonsense. Mint and chocolate do not belong together!
    Except here...
    307x00av17gn.jpg

    *drool* I once had the idea to bake brownies by doing the following:

    A. Spread half the brownie batter in the pan
    B. Cover the batter with a single layer of these beauties
    C. Spread the other half of the batter on top
    D. Layer them across the top

    Sadly, when I went to put my idea into action, I couldn't find them at ANY of the supermarkets. Ugh.

    OH MY GOD! You had me, I really want to know what happens. You must do it! I think they are mostly around at Christmas time.

    ......

    I'm doing it. I'm going to hunt them down now and I'm going to do it...

    Do it, do it! I NEED to know how this turns out. ;) I should hunt for them too....

    http://lilluna.com/eggless-cookie-dough/?utm_source=feedburner&amp;utm_medium=email&amp;utm_campaign=Feed:+lilluna/isXQ+(Lil'+Luna+-+All+Things+Good)

    I made this recipe tonight & had 10 grams of it since that's all I could fit in my diary for today haha. Very sweet, but so much better than the mock chickpea dough even though that was still pretty decent.

    When I REALLY want cookie dough, I make the real thing, raw eggs and all. ;) I tried out the mock one when I came across it because I was hoping it would be a lower calorie alternative--It wasn't, though! I could have had 3.5 cookies' worth of real dough for the same amount of calories, and the amount wasn't much more than that would be. And it tasted nothing like cookie dough *sobsob*

    That's some SERIOUSLY amazing willpower. I could never stick to ten grams of cookie dough, whether it fit in my diary or not! ;) I'd probably eat half the dough...

    This may get me judged... I have never understood the fascination with cookie dough! I gotta have my cookies baked - I like them still soft, but need them cooked.
    Endorsed.
  • xLoveLikeWinterx
    xLoveLikeWinterx Posts: 408 Member
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    ShibaEars wrote: »
    Just_Ceci wrote: »
    I never really considered having children, even when I was going through the whole pre-cana thing pre-marriage. I was all "if it happens, it happens", not thinking it would happen. And I was thinking that mostly because I'd been kind of promiscuous before I met my husband with nary a pregnancy scare. Well, wouldn't you know I got pregnant on my honeymoon. LOL Now, I love my son with all my heart; he is the light of my life. Do I want more? Not even a little bit.

    My husband keeps saying he wants to adopt or foster, so my son will have a brother. I DO NOT want another child. I am 45 years old next week, we live in a tiny house, and honestly, I just don't want to raise another kid. I am satisfied with my small family, even if that means my son is an only. Sometimes I think I'm being selfish, but that's just how I feel.

    Is anyone an only child or have an only child? Am I damaging my kid? :/

    I had my only child at 29. Before that I never wanted kids and never wanted anything to do with anyone else's kids. I got more grief from people after I had one child about not having another. SMDH My daughter is now (reasonably) adjusted 21 year old raising 2 kids of her own. I never regretted not having more kids!

    I was complaining to my friend about this the other day. She does not want kids, I'm still on the fence. But I was saying that no matter how many kids you have (or don't have) people are never happy. Don't have any, people want to know when you're having one. Have one - people want to know when you're having your second. And so on. It's very annoying!

    This is annoyingly true. I have 2 boys, no plans for more, and I get (almost daily) "So when are you having a girl?", "You can always try again", or my favorite "Well, boys are easier anyway" (which is true, but they say it like it's a consolation prize for me not having a daughter).
  • MoHousdon
    MoHousdon Posts: 8,722 Member
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    Just_Ceci wrote: »
    I skipped the first 637 pages...

    Confession: I don't eat nearly the calories MFP says I should.

    Not acceptable! ;)

    You have to at least find a random post from somewhere in the middle to quote. LOL

    I was going to say, "But that's where all the GOOD stuff is!"

  • xLoveLikeWinterx
    xLoveLikeWinterx Posts: 408 Member
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    LBuehrle8 wrote: »
    One of my best friends is an only child and she turned out terrific. Very, very intelligent, witty, and mature. I don't think being an only child makes you damaged at all. I do love my siblings, though... even if sometimes I compare myself to my sister and feel inadequate :lol: (she's beautiful and has the most gorgeous singing voice).

    I feel you there- by the way I'm the brunette in my picture- the blonde is my sister. She is GORGEOUS it's not even funny. Love her to death but sometimes get so jealous of her haha. I know what you mean though!

    I don't think it's damaging to only have one kid but I'm one of five and I can't imagine not having tons of siblings they're my best friends <3

    You are gorgeous too!

    Wish I was closer with my siblings. I have two younger brothers. One is in the Army, stationed in Germany, and is married with kids so I don't talk to him very often. The other is a mess and the only time he calls is to ask for money, which I stopped giving to him over ten years ago.

    I have 2 younger brothers, neither one of which I am close with, all because of the huge age gap. There's 8.5 and 7.5 yrs between us and I was basically a 2nd mom, which I resented. I remember how much I hated being an only child until they came, and then I got stuck taking care of them a lot.
  • ShibaEars
    ShibaEars Posts: 3,928 Member
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    kelly_c_77 wrote: »
    It is taking everything in me to hold myself together.. Next Friday will be the one year anniversary of my Mom's death. Somehow it still hasn't hit me as being real...like, I know she's gone, but something in me just will not accept it. I don't know how to move on. It doesn't help that 15 days after losing her, my 15 year old dog(my first "child") died. The past year has just been a giant roller coaster. I have never been an angry person and have never turned to food for comfort until all of this. I have thought so many times about going to speak to someone...but I just can't bring myself to do it.
    I have been lurking this thread from day one..keeping up every day... and I am overwhelmed by all the support you show each other and the friendships that have formed. I feel like I've gotten to know you all through all of your confessions/comments/advice/jokes...and I can relate to so many of you. I guess I felt I could let it all out here.

    Sigh...

    I'm sorry for your losses, I would be a wreck as well. I don't think you need to worry about "moving on", because I don't believe there's such a thing in this case. There isn't a way to stop missing someone that has passed away. I think it's more of a "learning to cope" kind of thing (I hope that makes sense...).

    Right now you are using food to cope - is there something else you could try (if you are concerned about it, that is)? If you aren't ready to talk to someone (although here is a good start) have you tried writing in a journal? Or just writing a story of some kind? I have a hard time writing about myself, but I do like to write fiction, and my emotions tend to come out in there. Or you could try painting, or exercising, or some other hobby that can redirect your feelings?

    You're in my thoughts, and there are lots of people that are willing to listen, when you're ready to talk :)
  • xLoveLikeWinterx
    xLoveLikeWinterx Posts: 408 Member
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    Tubbs216 wrote: »
    bkhamill wrote: »
    Lois_1989 wrote: »
    Tubbs216 wrote: »
    Just_Ceci wrote: »
    I'm totally judging all this mint nonsense. Mint and chocolate do not belong together!
    Except here...
    307x00av17gn.jpg

    *drool* I once had the idea to bake brownies by doing the following:

    A. Spread half the brownie batter in the pan
    B. Cover the batter with a single layer of these beauties
    C. Spread the other half of the batter on top
    D. Layer them across the top

    Sadly, when I went to put my idea into action, I couldn't find them at ANY of the supermarkets. Ugh.

    OH MY GOD! You had me, I really want to know what happens. You must do it! I think they are mostly around at Christmas time.

    ......

    I'm doing it. I'm going to hunt them down now and I'm going to do it...

    Do it, do it! I NEED to know how this turns out. ;) I should hunt for them too....

    http://lilluna.com/eggless-cookie-dough/?utm_source=feedburner&amp;utm_medium=email&amp;utm_campaign=Feed:+lilluna/isXQ+(Lil'+Luna+-+All+Things+Good)

    I made this recipe tonight & had 10 grams of it since that's all I could fit in my diary for today haha. Very sweet, but so much better than the mock chickpea dough even though that was still pretty decent.

    When I REALLY want cookie dough, I make the real thing, raw eggs and all. ;) I tried out the mock one when I came across it because I was hoping it would be a lower calorie alternative--It wasn't, though! I could have had 3.5 cookies' worth of real dough for the same amount of calories, and the amount wasn't much more than that would be. And it tasted nothing like cookie dough *sobsob*

    That's some SERIOUSLY amazing willpower. I could never stick to ten grams of cookie dough, whether it fit in my diary or not! ;) I'd probably eat half the dough...

    This may get me judged... I have never understood the fascination with cookie dough! I gotta have my cookies baked - I like them still soft, but need them cooked.
    Endorsed.

    Not a fan of cookie dough here either. I want it baked- I gag at the thought of the raw egg.
  • kellienw335
    kellienw335 Posts: 1,745 Member
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    Regarding how many kids to have and the comments people make, had the son first and then when I was pregnant with my daughter people would say, "Oh you'll have the perfect family with one boy and one girl". Now they ask when we are having another one and I say, "Never. The factory is closed!"
  • FluffySandwich
    FluffySandwich Posts: 1,293 Member
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    Mmmmm.... cookie dough. I made sour cream cookies not long ago and the raw dough was so much better than the baked cookies. I do love cookies though, especially soft and slightly gooey ones. Harder ones... not so much... but I'LL STILL EAT THEM!
  • ShibaEars
    ShibaEars Posts: 3,928 Member
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    eMka11 wrote: »
    I am really upset this morning because my degu is dying, I am sure of it now.....he has almost completely stopped eating and now his fur is falling out.....I was up at 4am hand feeding him corn flakes but have to leave for work now and am terrified he is going to die by himself in his cage while I am not home....I can't stop crying......its gonna be a long day, or few days, every time I have to leave the house.....

    so sorry to read this :( it must be hard for you. Hugs!

    I really had no idea how difficult it is to deal with a loss of your pet until today - previously we had a dog when I was a teenager and it was put to sleep when I was already moved out of the family home and at uni so it did not get to me as much as it could. This morning I have taken our rabbit pet to be euthanised as Blackie broke his leg over the weekend; they suggested amputation last night during the consultation, but with his age and some other health issues we decided it would be kinder to put him to sleep. I was an emotional mess when I arrived at the clinic and had to kick myself hard afterwards to be able to drive back home. I couldn't face going to work today and spent the day at home finding distractions so I don't have to think about it.

    So sorry :disappointed:
  • xLoveLikeWinterx
    xLoveLikeWinterx Posts: 408 Member
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    Tubbs216 wrote: »
    ShibaEars wrote: »
    I confess I am taking my dog to be neutered on Friday. I don't feel bad at all. In fact I am really looking forwards to seeing how many things he walks into while he's wearing the cone of shame.
    (I'm awful I know)

    Nothing wrong with seeing the bright side of a situation :wink:
    Aww, poor puppy. My friend had a cat that she took to get neutered and when they came back he jumped straight off their 5th floor balcony. :o Keep a close eye on him in case he's suicidal - you know what men are like about their bits. Talking of which, I've just made an appointment for my husband to discuss getting neutered.

    LOL! My husband is talking about going back under the knife to undo that. Funny, we can't get on the same page. Way back in the early part of this Confession thread, I think I mentioned that I wanted to have another child with current husband but was probably not going to happen. It's mostly because we're both in our 40's (I'm 41, he's 44) and he'd had the V before we met. I decided it wasn't worth it and dropped it. Now, he's talking about going to the doctor and discussing options. Ha!

    Yeah, I would've loved a 3rd, but with PPD issues and how demanding in temperament both my boys are, it's not happening. Hubby said no way and went and got snipped in Nov. I was only 70% on board with it but it was for the best and at the time my PPD was at its peak so I didn't argue. Now I wish I'd been firmer about it but I'll get over it.
  • smashley_mashley
    smashley_mashley Posts: 589 Member
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    Francl27 wrote: »
    Another rather lame confession: I haven't the slightest idea what to do with my hair. I haven't had short hair since I was a baby just starting to grow it. I wish I had the courage to chop it up or do something with it, but I'm just scared of making it look worse. It's extremely wavy (and in my opinion, not the good kind of wavy!!!) and hard to manage, so I just straighten it all the time to make it easier for me to deal with, at least. It also wants to always be parted in the middle. I went to see a hair stylist last year and she told me that my hair was "refusing to be parted down the side." Dumb hair.

    My sister has experimented with all kinds of cuts and colors (well, all shades of red), and I wish I could be more like her. For some reason I'm just too scared.

    Have you ever tried a diffuser on your hair and do you use gel?
    I looked up diffusers- they go on the end of blowdryers? I always let my hair dry naturally, and never use gel either :tongue: No gel, hairspray, or anything... though I probably should get something to protect my hair from the heat when I straighten it.

    There are times I like my hair, like when I wake up and think I have ok looking waves for once. The bad thing is I can't brush my hair lest it turn into a frizzy mess. Someone on Facebook actually shared an image that shows what it's like for me. Before brushing and after brushing:

    rw8u5to7mp70.jpg

    Before I started straightening my hair, I had a friend who would always ask me why I never brushed my hair. I WAS brushing my hair, but it was coming out looking like the picture on the right!!! (but worse) :tired_face:

    Ugh. My hair is EXACTLY the same. Isn't it annoying?! I just don't brush it... Then if I do, I immediately braid it down my back. End of drama. ;)

    agreed - don't brush it. I am a fan of the Marc Anthony Stricly Curls products. I use hair cream and the spray on towel dried hair. If it is nice and warm out I will just let it air dry even w/o combing it from the shower. If it is yucky and cold out (i.e. winter), I will use the diffuser. I just don't have the time anymore to flat iron it everyday.

    the only time I will brush it is right before bed and then it turns into a bit of an afro.

    But don't you get tangled? My hair gets horribly tangled all over if I don't brush it...


    Confession - I HATE the Facebook MFP page. Always posting recipes that are 'only 200 calories' with ridiculous serving sizes (like half a sandwich). Pisses me off! Seriously who eats half a sandwich???

    i keep my hair really short and any knots can be combed out with a pick and then the brush. I used to have long hair but my hair is so thick and heavy that it ended up in ponytail 99% of the time by 7:30 a.m. I also miss being near water. Whenever we vacation to somewhere such as San Fran, Seattle, or Chicago, the humidity just makes it so curly that it looks so much better (nevermind making my skin feel amazing!). Stupid dry climate.


  • nonoelmo
    nonoelmo Posts: 3,941 Member
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    peleroja wrote: »
    Came to say I'm an only child too and I am so grateful for it. I have an excellent relationship with my parents, no family drama, and because they only had me they were able to provide me with a lot of stuff I might not have had otherwise. Having only one kid meant they were able to let me take tons of classes and lessons and go to camps and stuff (not only because they could be expensive but because they had the time and energy to take me to all of it), travel (including a student exchange), let me graduate uni without debt, etc etc. They gave me a lot, both materially and otherwise, because one kid meant I got a lot of their time and energy.

    Not to say that people don't or can't do that for their kids if they have more than one, just saying that one kid is easier to shuttle around to piano and horseback riding and gymnastics and you don't have to worry about being fair and giving both kids the same opportunities when one wants to go on a school trip abroad or whatever. And it's definitely selfishly nice to not have to share my parents' attention, truthfully.

    My mom did start a dayhome out of our house when I was three, though, to make sure I spent lots of time with other kids and didn't end up a spoiled little terror. So I would say that making sure only children get plenty of interaction with other kids is a good idea.

    On an unrelated note, I'm leaving to get married in Vegas tomorrow! Weeeeeeee! And I confess that I'm more excited about going on vacation than I am about the wedding, lol. Like, I'm really happy we're getting married, but I just don't care much about the actual wedding...

    congratulations!
  • MoHousdon
    MoHousdon Posts: 8,722 Member
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    BZAH10 wrote: »
    MoHousdon wrote: »
    Daily confession.

    My husband's daughter's boyfriend broke up with her on Mother's Day and she is "living" with us now. I put living in quotes because since last Tuesday, she's stayed the night once or twice, the rest of the nights (she works evenings) she doesn't bother coming home or even calling to say she's not going to be home. I understand she's an adult being 19, but I also expect her to show us some gratitude and respect for taking her and her cat in when she didn't really have anywhere else to go. Although, she must have SOMEWHERE to sleep since she's not sleeping in our house.

    I am fully miffed about the whole thing because I feel like she is using us to store her stuff and take care of her cat. I have asked my husband to talk to her, but I'm sure he won't since he doesn't like confrontation and she's just now coming into our lives after not being allowed to see us for the past 14 years and he doesn't want to do anything to jeopardize that.

    I am upset and hurt and don't know what to do. :/

    Who took care of her cat previously? I could be mistaken, but when she was with her boyfriend, didn't they live with his mom or something? I'm wondering if she hasn't had to take care of the cat and doesn't realize she needs to now. I'd address that for sure. If you have a pet, you are responsible for it. Tough situation all the way around, though.

    She did live with his mom, then they got an apartment together a few months ago and I'm not sure who took care of the cat. When they lived with his mom, she had like 9 other animals but Rory was kept in a bedroom all the time because she's not very animal friendly. It's not fair to her to be locked in a bedroom alone all the time. You're right, it's a tough situation and I wish my husband would just handle it.

  • kellienw335
    kellienw335 Posts: 1,745 Member
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    Francl27 wrote: »
    Another rather lame confession: I haven't the slightest idea what to do with my hair. I haven't had short hair since I was a baby just starting to grow it. I wish I had the courage to chop it up or do something with it, but I'm just scared of making it look worse. It's extremely wavy (and in my opinion, not the good kind of wavy!!!) and hard to manage, so I just straighten it all the time to make it easier for me to deal with, at least. It also wants to always be parted in the middle. I went to see a hair stylist last year and she told me that my hair was "refusing to be parted down the side." Dumb hair.

    My sister has experimented with all kinds of cuts and colors (well, all shades of red), and I wish I could be more like her. For some reason I'm just too scared.

    Have you ever tried a diffuser on your hair and do you use gel?
    I looked up diffusers- they go on the end of blowdryers? I always let my hair dry naturally, and never use gel either :tongue: No gel, hairspray, or anything... though I probably should get something to protect my hair from the heat when I straighten it.

    There are times I like my hair, like when I wake up and think I have ok looking waves for once. The bad thing is I can't brush my hair lest it turn into a frizzy mess. Someone on Facebook actually shared an image that shows what it's like for me. Before brushing and after brushing:

    rw8u5to7mp70.jpg

    Before I started straightening my hair, I had a friend who would always ask me why I never brushed my hair. I WAS brushing my hair, but it was coming out looking like the picture on the right!!! (but worse) :tired_face:

    Ugh. My hair is EXACTLY the same. Isn't it annoying?! I just don't brush it... Then if I do, I immediately braid it down my back. End of drama. ;)

    agreed - don't brush it. I am a fan of the Marc Anthony Stricly Curls products. I use hair cream and the spray on towel dried hair. If it is nice and warm out I will just let it air dry even w/o combing it from the shower. If it is yucky and cold out (i.e. winter), I will use the diffuser. I just don't have the time anymore to flat iron it everyday.

    the only time I will brush it is right before bed and then it turns into a bit of an afro.

    But don't you get tangled? My hair gets horribly tangled all over if I don't brush it...


    Confession - I HATE the Facebook MFP page. Always posting recipes that are 'only 200 calories' with ridiculous serving sizes (like half a sandwich). Pisses me off! Seriously who eats half a sandwich???

    I put conditioner in my hair during my shower in the morning and run a pick through it after rinsing, but that's all the "brushing" that I do. Didn't actually own a brush until I had my son...my hubby shaves his head so he had no need for one either.