Confession Time! ((ABSOLUTELY NO JUDGEMENT))
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kellienw335 wrote: »pofoster21 wrote: »xLoveLikeWinterx wrote: »lilaclovebird wrote: »
Parenting is so hard, I am taking every effort to never have to do it.
And think about it, parenting with TWO parents is hard... and single parents...woah. AND if everyone is working?!
Everyone else can go ahead and make successful and wonderful humans. I do not feel strong enough to partake in that endeavor.
ETA: I am serious about everything in this post. I see parenting as very difficult. It takes skills and abilities that I am pretty sure I do not possess.
Here's something I've never confessed IRL before...
I don't enjoy parenting. I don't think I was meant to be a mum.
Don't get me wrong, I love my boys with all my heart. I give all of myself to them to ensure they feel loved, are happy and healthy.
But I just don't think I was cut out for it. I've had pretty severe postnatal depression since my first was born 3 years ago and I'm sure that contributes, but I do wonder if its just my personality. Also, I carry a lot of guilt over my depression, its so unfair to them and I worry I'm messing up their whole lives
Aaaaaaaand now I want to cover my feelings in food.
I could've pretty much wrote this post, word for word. I have a 3.5 yr old and an 8 month old (both boys). Everyone tells me I'm an awesome mom, but I feel like I'm failing at it constantly. It's not effortless for me like everyone else I see on Facebook. I have to WORK at my patience.
To be fair, I'm pretty sure I have PPD and my 3.5 yr old is a DRAMA QUEEN and can be difficult, but still. I give everything I have in me to them, literally, and I still feel like I'm doing it wrong.
Part of my inability to keep the weight off is I eat my feelings at night alone when they're in bed, because I sit and relive my parenting failures for the day in my head, over and over.
And hi, I've lurked but decided to post in the thread today
Welcome to the thread! Please don't beat yourself up! We all do it. Many admissions and confessions regarding that here. It does you nor your children any good. Don't rehash the past. Just do your best every day. That's all your kids need. Do seek help for PPD because that is serious to deal with.
Also, the people who make self-promoting parenting posts on Facebook are liars. Ignore all that noise.
This made me laugh. That has to be the most judgmental thing you have ever said! (And I love it!)
It's okay to judge everyone else NOT on this thread, right? I thought those were the rules.
YES! Of course those are the rules!
Good deal - I like to be judgy sometimes!0 -
Confession: I totally traded out my lunch for a piece of carrot cake. Oh, yeah I did that.
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kellienw335 wrote: »FluffySandwich wrote: »I decided to try the stationary bike at the gym today.... it was almost successful in murdering my butt. I thought the stationary bike was going to be easy after 40 minutes of stairmaster, but nope!!! They need to invest in some comfy seats so my tush can stop screaming at me.
That's the main thing keeping me from getting a bike. Mix a Lot wrote a song about it once...
LOL! And so true! My son got a new bike a couple weeks ago...I tried to ride it...No flipping way!
The pains subside rather quickly. Usually about a week for new riders... After that, you are good to go!
Ya, you gotta build up some "butt callouses" then you'll be okay.
I've biked a lot for almost 30 years. And by a lot I mean it has varied from a short daily commute to long biking vacations (i.e. from a few miles to lots of miles). I have one tip to add to the others. Bike shorts designed for women. Takes a few rides to get used to but makes a big difference.
Padded shorts are great! I've also read that (although it seems backwards) a more narrow seat can be more comfortable. If the seat is too wide it might not let your body/hips/knees align properly. I know this is true for my bike. My seat is narrower and much more comfortable than some of the wide-seated spin bikes at the gym.
I did a bike tour thing a couple years ago, almost 100 km over 2 days (mountain biking, so narrow, hilly trails) and no amount of padding was enough for that pain on the second day. I couldn't sit on my bike properly for the first hour or so, until everything went kind of numb hahaha.
I've tried a few different saddles and the one that I absolutely cherish is the one I thought I would hate. I need to find another just like it.0 -
Confession: I want to go on a vacation with just my husband without the 5 and 7 year old. I am willing to let them stay with family for a few days. Not a month or anything, like a long weekend. My husband doesn't trust a sole on this earth with his kids so this won't happen. At least until my kids are out of the house. So I will get a kid free vacation in about 11 years if I'm lucky. This is sad to me because I think couples need time together, but I feel guilty too like he's the better parent because I'm ok with them being with other people for a few days and he won't have it. ok rambling over.
This is 100% not the case. Against popular opinion, your marriage has to come first. Without a solid foundation of love, trust, quality time and all that other equally important stuff, a marriage cannot grow. I'm sorry your husband doesn't trust anyone to take care of your kids for a few days so you can recharge your couple battery. I would maybe try talking to him and see if you can come to some sort of agreement or compromise. This is just my opinion and my husband doesn't feel this way at all, see previous posts, so you can completely ignore my advice if you want. I hope you don't have to wait 11+ years for your vacation though.
Absolutely! I think this a the #1 common error among spouses once children arrive on the scene. Then it snowballs: after the children are raised "empty nest" syndrome kicks in. However, if you keep both your marriage and your own personal life healthy, happy and well-rounded then there is no such thing as "empty nest" syndrome. IMHO.0 -
xMrBunglex wrote: »Back in the mad-pad days of my early 20s (6 guys living in a 2 bedroom apt), we had this roommate who would buy a 2 liter of Coke and put it in the fridge, only to have it downed by roommates when he wasn't there. (not me, a couple of broke guys would.)
After a month or so of this, one day he came home with a 2 liter & said "Attention!", and while we watched he picked his nose & put it in the bottle. "I've been doing this for the last 2 weeks" he said.
A couple guys literally turned green. So awesome.
This is gross and awesome. The thieves totally deserved it.0 -
kellienw335 wrote: »I need to say something that will lighten the heavy feeling I have today. The weather is NOT helping either.
In just over 6 weeks, my husband and I will be jetting down to Florida for a VERY belated honeymoon. I could NOT be more excited if I tried. I am also extremely nervous and anxious about the whole thing. I really don't know what to expect and that's very thrilling and nerve wracking at the same time. I'm excited to wear my new swimsuit and sun hat I just bought this weekend. It's very chic. I just need to get some cute maxi dresses and a cute swimsuit cover up to wear on the beach. I could also use some helpful tips about traveling by plane.
Thanks!
Make sure you follow the airlines rules about what you can/can't take in your carry-on (and check to make sure your bag is an acceptable size). It'll suck if you have to throw out something when you're going through security! Be aware that belt buckles and sometimes underwire in bras can set off the metal detectors, so just something to think about while getting dressed that day I prefer to sleep on planes, so one of those wrap around neck pillows is a must for me, but I know some people can't sleep so you might not need one. Give yourself lots of time to get to the airport and through security. Check BEFORE you leave home if your flight is delayed/cancelled for some reason.
If you've never flown before and aren't sure how your stomach will handle it, pack some ginger pills or Gravol just in case.
ETA: Also, pack gum or chewy candy, something to chew while taking off & landing (for your ears). I actually wear ear plugs when I fly. They might not work for everyone, and it does say to take them out once you're at altitude, but I just wear them the whole time. It's a little annoying if you have to talk to someone since you can't tell how loud you're talking, but with them in my ears don't pop at all and it is wonderful.
WOW!!! @ShibaEars that was ALL very useful information. I do remember chewing gum on the plane and my ears are very sensitive to elevation changes so that's a must for me. I also have some Beats headphones so I'll be bringing them along too. I will make sure to dress comfortable with a wireless bra (probably workout out clothes since they're super comfortable) so I don't get pulled aside by the NSA.
My husband and I are going to sit down and make a list of all the stuff we need to buy, do and plan. Little tip about me...I LOVE LISTS!!! It's soothing to my mild OCD.
Me too! Me too! I have an Excel spreadsheet for everything groceries, vacations, to do lists!! Lists make me so happy!
Me too! Love excel spreadsheets!!
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kellienw335 wrote: »I need to say something that will lighten the heavy feeling I have today. The weather is NOT helping either.
In just over 6 weeks, my husband and I will be jetting down to Florida for a VERY belated honeymoon. I could NOT be more excited if I tried. I am also extremely nervous and anxious about the whole thing. I really don't know what to expect and that's very thrilling and nerve wracking at the same time. I'm excited to wear my new swimsuit and sun hat I just bought this weekend. It's very chic. I just need to get some cute maxi dresses and a cute swimsuit cover up to wear on the beach. I could also use some helpful tips about traveling by plane.
Thanks!
Make sure you follow the airlines rules about what you can/can't take in your carry-on (and check to make sure your bag is an acceptable size). It'll suck if you have to throw out something when you're going through security! Be aware that belt buckles and sometimes underwire in bras can set off the metal detectors, so just something to think about while getting dressed that day I prefer to sleep on planes, so one of those wrap around neck pillows is a must for me, but I know some people can't sleep so you might not need one. Give yourself lots of time to get to the airport and through security. Check BEFORE you leave home if your flight is delayed/cancelled for some reason.
If you've never flown before and aren't sure how your stomach will handle it, pack some ginger pills or Gravol just in case.
Congratulations on your belated honeymoon! I'm sure you'll have an excellent time. My biggest flying tip is to drink plenty of water - I always get soooo dehydrated. And make sure you have a sweater or little travel blanket, planes are usually cold (at least for me, I'm always cold though)!
I'm always cold too. Do they sell travel blankets? Can I bring water or get water on the plane? I try to drink a minimum of 16 ounces of water by 10 am, so hopefully I'll be fine. Just hope I don't have to pee until I can make it to our layover stop.
Thanks for the congratulations. When I say VERY belated, I'm talking 15 years belated.
RE: travel blankets - I always bring a light jacket or zip up hoodie so it's easy to take on and off. And I hope you have so much fun on your trip!
I ALWAYS carry a hoodie with me, but I will sure to have one that day for sure. Thanks!WestCoastJo82 wrote: »Ahh, my first MFP eaten post. @MoHousdon - go to the D terminal for shopping in Dallas and bring your own snacks (beverages purchased after security) was the basic jist of my message. Enjoy your flight and honeymoon!
Thanks, @WestCoastJo82 I will remember D terminal for "delightful shopping in Dallas!"
I usually travel with a large decorative scarf. It fold down to nothing and can be worn around the neck, draped as a shawl or used as a blanket if it is cold on the airplane.
I travel with dried fruit and nuts and instant oatmeal packets in my luggage and energy bars of my choice in my carry on. If you get delayed or things just take too long having food on hand can be a lifesaver. Once you pass through security go buy yourself a bottle of water. Have a great trip!
I am planning on bringing some Quest Bars in my carryon. I also have so travel mix that I got from the local candy store that would be perfect too. Thanks for the advice and the well wishes!
Just so you know if you do get a layover in Dallas (where I currently reside) Just be prepared for delays especially if you travel AA or US. They've been have some issues recently over here. ( I would know since my BF is a pilot for US) He always complains about the hour or two delays. So just make a note ;p I hope you have a fantastic trip!
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FluffySandwich wrote: »So I looked up awesome drinks to try in the Dominican Republic, and I found out about the ''dirty monkey,'' which is something I need in my life:
A drinkable, alcoholic dessert, which I'm sure is extremely dangerous for me. Especially since I'm a lightweight and am prone to drinking my way through alcoholic drinks WAY too fast (''Whoa... where did my wine go?''). Someone at work told me to try the ''mamajuana.'' No idea what that is but it looks to be of a citrus-y nature. Sorry guys, I'm getting terribly excited.
... I'm going to gain back every single pound, aren't I?
OMG I lived on Dirty Monkey's while in Jamaica! totally worth the 10 pound gain lol0 -
Italian_Buju wrote: »Italian_Buju wrote: »I am really upset this morning because my degu is dying, I am sure of it now.....he has almost completely stopped eating and now his fur is falling out.....I was up at 4am hand feeding him corn flakes but have to leave for work now and am terrified he is going to die by himself in his cage while I am not home....I can't stop crying......its gonna be a long day, or few days, every time I have to leave the house.....
That's just heartbreaking. I'm so sorry. Losing a pet, no matter how or when, is always so hard.
I have an indoor/outdoor (mostly outdoor) cat that I haven't seen in almost 2 weeks. We live in kind of a wooded area so I think an animal got him. I was thinking something happened last week when I didn't see him, but now that almost a whole week has passed and I still haven't seen him, I'm pretty sure he's gone for good. He was my boy and I'm sad I'll probably never get to hold him again.
So far my little guy is hanging on, but still not really eating anything but hand fed corn flakes.....
Sorry about your kitty!! That is so hard!
Glad your little guy is hanging in there. Maybe he just needs to serious TLC that only hand fed corn flakes can provide.
I was really struggling with Owen being gone yesterday. Every time I'd think about him, I'd bread down in tears. I hope he makes his way back home. That's him in my profile picture.
Don't give up hope on your kitty! Growing up we had one cat that disappeared for over 3 weeks, and another that was gone for over 2 weeks before they found their ways home. (and they were both indoor, declawed cats).0 -
Italian_Buju wrote: »I am really upset this morning because my degu is dying, I am sure of it now.....he has almost completely stopped eating and now his fur is falling out.....I was up at 4am hand feeding him corn flakes but have to leave for work now and am terrified he is going to die by himself in his cage while I am not home....I can't stop crying......its gonna be a long day, or few days, every time I have to leave the house.....
I am so sorry about this. Not that I want to hurry this along or seem insensitive, but if you are sure he is dying maybe you would want to consider euthanasia? I know how hard that is but it is so peaceful for the animal. I have done this for all my animals, and frankly, wish someone would do this for me when I get old and sick. To be honest, I waited too long on 2 of my cats...wish I had done it sooner as they were in bad shape but I so didn't want to let them go. 0 -
kellyjellybellyjelly wrote: »kellyjellybellyjelly wrote: »My only confession on here is that I have strictly went by the book! I have had a few drinks, but it was in my caloric intake, so it was ok. My only problem is that I am NOT eating back my burned calories for exercise! I know, that could be a bad thing! But with what I am eating during the day, I am not hungry for anything else! I am only 5 ft tall, and have a small bone structure. I have lost approx 30 lbs and need to lose 80 more. I am still new at this and need to know if I need to change anything in my profile! I am eating 1000 calories a day, MFP goal was 1000-1200. Since I had so much to lose, I have been hitting the 1000 mark. I have also upped my exercise to 2 hours a day doing continual dancing. No breaks! This is not my first time on the roller coaster weight loss thing! I have lost 100 lb at least 2 almost 3 times. I want this to be my last and make this my life change since I am 45. The smallest I have been was 118 lb. I wore a size 2 or 5 at the time. Sorry this "confession" turned into my life story! Any advice would be helpful
I know we're not supposed to judge posts, but please be kind to your body! Since you asked for advice then I would say to do it sustainably by eating a decent amount & exercising less or with breaks. Think of weight loss as a marathon & not a 100 yard dash. Also since you have more to lose you can get away with eating more & not starving yourself by eating around 1,000 calories. If you don't weigh your food you could be eating more than 1,000 calories & not realizing. My biggest suggestion would be to get a food scale & weigh in grams & ounces & to at least try to net 1,200.
I weigh EVERYTHING I eat I am very strict on myself about this. Do I need to update my profile any? MFP did put my caloric goal between 1000-1200, but I have lost 30lbs since starting, and exercising more.
Do you have any medical conditions that makes it hard at times to lose weight? I guess as long as you're eating at least 1,200 calories a day then you should be fine. The problem with eating less than that is you're not usually getting enough of your daily macro & micros & it makes it easier to binge when you eat more.
I did update my profile last night, and it did increase my caloric intake to 1200! Won't I gain weight if I am eating more?? Is that a stupid question? I am still gonna exercise 2 hours a day, dancing or walking. I am sorry if I am not understanding any of this!
How much more do you want to lose? Personally, I say be careful with the 2 hours/day of exercise. You could burn out or get an overuse injury. Then, if you are relying on that amount activity for weight loss and can't keep it up it could derail you. Focus on your calories accurately first. If that is in line with your goals then scale back the exercise. You also want to lose slowly if you have a lot to go so that you can try to avoid any excess skin. Give your body time to adapt to each pound being lost.0 -
nicsflyingcircus wrote: »berlynnwall wrote: »Caught up!
I'm not too worried about this parenting thing. I'm worried about the nitty, grittiness of sleep deprivation and exhaustion that comes with the early days, but beyond ensuring the kid's physical well-being, I feel like the actual 'parenting' part will be okay. I'm a decent person. My husband is a decent person. My parents were decent people and my siblings and I turned out fine. Not a lot of drama, not a lot of scares and we all put up with one another to varying degrees. Sure I expect there will be arguments and frustrations and bumps in the road, but I'm not aiming for perfection as I think that probably doesn't exist.
Am I being too blasé about the whole thing?!
Nah. I will say though that based on nothing but my time on pregnancy message boards (tip: do not go to a pregnancy message board, the craziest people spend all day there) most first babies seem to be easy. That's how they trick you into having another one. My oldest was the easiest baby in the world. I found myself thinking "why do people complain about this?". Five years later when I had my daughter, I found out how bad it could be. My daughter has also taught me to be a lot less judgmental about parenting styles. I parented her in the same general way as my son, and she is ?
I feel this exact way about my 4th child. She can be so sweet sometimes, but EVERYTHING is a damned battle with her. I cannot possibly convey how mule-obstinate she can be about the smallest things. It doesn't help that the older three (one of whom has to share a room with her) have figured out how to trigger her demon rages.
All her teachers love her though, so I am occasionally "grateful" she saves her insanity for her father and I mostly.
This is spot on my daughter too. My husband are always getting how sweet and polite and well behaved and helpful she is. That's awesome, FOR YOU. You should see her at home. Not helpful at all unless she feels like it which is almost never!
Yesterday I just want to punch her in the face. She was going to an end of the year school dance and changed into shorts. It was 50 degrees outside and I told her she'd freeze if she wore shorts. She said, "You've never been to one of our dances and I am always hot." I argued with her back and forth then finally said word for word, "FINE! Freeze your *kitten* off, I don't care! Get out of my house!" Yesterday was NOT the day to come at me. Not my best mommy moment, but I didn't feel bad either.
I did the exact same thing 2 days ago when my kids insisted on going to school in short sleeves and shorts when it was 60 degrees out. Whatever. They can be cold. Maybe they'll learn something.
Worst this year were Supernatural and the Flash. You just don't stop a season that way. It's rude.
So I'm under the weather again, totally exhausted, headache, throat bothering me again... 3 cups of coffee so far and seriously considering a 4th. Feeling guilty because I can't exercise again so I just know I'll be way over this week, because of course my appetite isn't going anywhere, I ate too much two days ago and we have an event on Sunday... but I've just been sitting in the recliner watching X Files (got to see it all before the next season in January!).0 -
ddrhellbunny wrote: »kellienw335 wrote: »I need to say something that will lighten the heavy feeling I have today. The weather is NOT helping either.
In just over 6 weeks, my husband and I will be jetting down to Florida for a VERY belated honeymoon. I could NOT be more excited if I tried. I am also extremely nervous and anxious about the whole thing. I really don't know what to expect and that's very thrilling and nerve wracking at the same time. I'm excited to wear my new swimsuit and sun hat I just bought this weekend. It's very chic. I just need to get some cute maxi dresses and a cute swimsuit cover up to wear on the beach. I could also use some helpful tips about traveling by plane.
Thanks!
Make sure you follow the airlines rules about what you can/can't take in your carry-on (and check to make sure your bag is an acceptable size). It'll suck if you have to throw out something when you're going through security! Be aware that belt buckles and sometimes underwire in bras can set off the metal detectors, so just something to think about while getting dressed that day I prefer to sleep on planes, so one of those wrap around neck pillows is a must for me, but I know some people can't sleep so you might not need one. Give yourself lots of time to get to the airport and through security. Check BEFORE you leave home if your flight is delayed/cancelled for some reason.
If you've never flown before and aren't sure how your stomach will handle it, pack some ginger pills or Gravol just in case.
Congratulations on your belated honeymoon! I'm sure you'll have an excellent time. My biggest flying tip is to drink plenty of water - I always get soooo dehydrated. And make sure you have a sweater or little travel blanket, planes are usually cold (at least for me, I'm always cold though)!
I'm always cold too. Do they sell travel blankets? Can I bring water or get water on the plane? I try to drink a minimum of 16 ounces of water by 10 am, so hopefully I'll be fine. Just hope I don't have to pee until I can make it to our layover stop.
Thanks for the congratulations. When I say VERY belated, I'm talking 15 years belated.
RE: travel blankets - I always bring a light jacket or zip up hoodie so it's easy to take on and off. And I hope you have so much fun on your trip!
I ALWAYS carry a hoodie with me, but I will sure to have one that day for sure. Thanks!WestCoastJo82 wrote: »Ahh, my first MFP eaten post. @MoHousdon - go to the D terminal for shopping in Dallas and bring your own snacks (beverages purchased after security) was the basic jist of my message. Enjoy your flight and honeymoon!
Thanks, @WestCoastJo82 I will remember D terminal for "delightful shopping in Dallas!"
I usually travel with a large decorative scarf. It fold down to nothing and can be worn around the neck, draped as a shawl or used as a blanket if it is cold on the airplane.
I travel with dried fruit and nuts and instant oatmeal packets in my luggage and energy bars of my choice in my carry on. If you get delayed or things just take too long having food on hand can be a lifesaver. Once you pass through security go buy yourself a bottle of water. Have a great trip!
I am planning on bringing some Quest Bars in my carryon. I also have so travel mix that I got from the local candy store that would be perfect too. Thanks for the advice and the well wishes!
Just so you know if you do get a layover in Dallas (where I currently reside) Just be prepared for delays especially if you travel AA or US. They've been have some issues recently over here. ( I would know since my BF is a pilot for US) He always complains about the hour or two delays. So just make a note ;p I hope you have a fantastic trip!
I wasn't going to be negative, but since someone else brought it up: HATE the DFW airport. I mean, not the airport itself, but I have never once made a connecting flight there on time. Also, a 2 hr. layover there is not much because the airport is so large. If you want to shop at concourse D find out which concourse you land in and which you depart from and plan accordingly. It takes a while to get to each concourse. But, you'll still make your destination and you'll have a great time, I'm sure!0 -
FluffySandwich wrote: »
I looked up diffusers- they go on the end of blowdryers? I always let my hair dry naturally, and never use gel eitherkellienw335 wrote: »FluffySandwich wrote: »Another rather lame confession: I haven't the slightest idea what to do with my hair. I haven't had short hair since I was a baby just starting to grow it. I wish I had the courage to chop it up or do something with it, but I'm just scared of making it look worse. It's extremely wavy (and in my opinion, not the good kind of wavy!!!) and hard to manage, so I just straighten it all the time to make it easier for me to deal with, at least. It also wants to always be parted in the middle. I went to see a hair stylist last year and she told me that my hair was "refusing to be parted down the side." Dumb hair.
My sister has experimented with all kinds of cuts and colors (well, all shades of red), and I wish I could be more like her. For some reason I'm just too scared.
Have you ever tried a diffuser on your hair and do you use gel?
No gel, hairspray, or anything... though I probably should get something to protect my hair from the heat when I straighten it.
There are times I like my hair, like when I wake up and think I have ok looking waves for once. The bad thing is I can't brush my hair lest it turn into a frizzy mess. Someone on Facebook actually shared an image that shows what it's like for me. Before brushing and after brushing:
Before I started straightening my hair, I had a friend who would always ask me why I never brushed my hair. I WAS brushing my hair, but it was coming out looking like the picture on the right!!! (but worse)
I would love to have the hair on the left. I have dead straight hair. 0 -
On the only child thing, I have 3 brothers so was used to being surrounded by other kids. Then when I was 9 I went to live with an aunt for a year whose kids were grown so was essentially an only child for that year. It wasn't due to any bad circumstances - it was to learn French by immersing myself in the country/culture, worked a treat!. So I was in a different country to my brothers and really didn't hear from them for most of the year.
On the one hand there weren't any kids to talk to in the house, but on the other hand I've always valued my own company. I was awesome at imaginary play, or just disappearing for an afternoon to paint pictures. From a quality of life point of view, I enjoyed myself either way. Kids are adaptable, so I think I just adapted to whatever environment I was in. I think the main thing is that the child feels secure and loved. Everything else will sort itself out, be it single child or siblings galore.
What an amazing opportunity for you! Sounds like you were a laid back, adaptable child. I think it also depends on how the parents present and react to the situations as well. For some reason, when my sister and I were little and we were moving to a bigger house my mom refused to move to a different neighborhood that would mean us changing schools. It was a big deal and the main reason we moved where we did. We were happy that we didn't have to change schools, of course, but I grew up thinking how "scary" it would be and when new kids would come to our school or friends were moving away I thought it was so terrible! Very closed-minded of me, but I didn't know better back then. Good for your parents for giving you that experience!0 -
Confession: I want to go on a vacation with just my husband without the 5 and 7 year old. I am willing to let them stay with family for a few days. Not a month or anything, like a long weekend. My husband doesn't trust a sole on this earth with his kids so this won't happen. At least until my kids are out of the house. So I will get a kid free vacation in about 11 years if I'm lucky. This is sad to me because I think couples need time together, but I feel guilty too like he's the better parent because I'm ok with them being with other people for a few days and he won't have it. ok rambling over.
Couples do need time together without the kids. It helps you remember that it isn't just about the kids, it is about you two together.0 -
My coworker told me that it's ''delicious,'' but will ''peel your eyelids back'' if you're not careful. I drink very rarely, so I'm not so sure if that's going to be a smooth experience. I'll definitely give it a shot, though!FluffySandwich wrote: »So I looked up awesome drinks to try in the Dominican Republic, and I found out about the ''dirty monkey,'' which is something I need in my life:
A drinkable, alcoholic dessert, which I'm sure is extremely dangerous for me. Especially since I'm a lightweight and am prone to drinking my way through alcoholic drinks WAY too fast (''Whoa... where did my wine go?''). Someone at work told me to try the ''mamajuana.'' No idea what that is but it looks to be of a citrus-y nature. Sorry guys, I'm getting terribly excited.
... I'm going to gain back every single pound, aren't I?
I tried this when I was in the Dominican, it is... interesting? It's a local beverage and the stuff I had was potent. I drank no more than an ounce, and even that was done in teeny sips because it's such a strong flavor.
Hahaha!!! I'm a sucker for anything banana-y, pineapple-y, and coconut-y. I already plan on drinking some delicious pina coladasMissLaaber wrote: »FluffySandwich wrote: »So I looked up awesome drinks to try in the Dominican Republic, and I found out about the ''dirty monkey,'' which is something I need in my life:
A drinkable, alcoholic dessert, which I'm sure is extremely dangerous for me. Especially since I'm a lightweight and am prone to drinking my way through alcoholic drinks WAY too fast (''Whoa... where did my wine go?''). Someone at work told me to try the ''mamajuana.'' No idea what that is but it looks to be of a citrus-y nature. Sorry guys, I'm getting terribly excited.
... I'm going to gain back every single pound, aren't I?
OMG I lived on Dirty Monkey's while in Jamaica! totally worth the 10 pound gain lol
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CountessKitteh wrote: »I need to say something that will lighten the heavy feeling I have today. The weather is NOT helping either.
In just over 6 weeks, my husband and I will be jetting down to Florida for a VERY belated honeymoon. I could NOT be more excited if I tried. I am also extremely nervous and anxious about the whole thing. I really don't know what to expect and that's very thrilling and nerve wracking at the same time. I'm excited to wear my new swimsuit and sun hat I just bought this weekend. It's very chic. I just need to get some cute maxi dresses and a cute swimsuit cover up to wear on the beach. I could also use some helpful tips about traveling by plane.
Thanks!
Make sure you follow the airlines rules about what you can/can't take in your carry-on (and check to make sure your bag is an acceptable size). It'll suck if you have to throw out something when you're going through security! Be aware that belt buckles and sometimes underwire in bras can set off the metal detectors, so just something to think about while getting dressed that day I prefer to sleep on planes, so one of those wrap around neck pillows is a must for me, but I know some people can't sleep so you might not need one. Give yourself lots of time to get to the airport and through security. Check BEFORE you leave home if your flight is delayed/cancelled for some reason.
If you've never flown before and aren't sure how your stomach will handle it, pack some ginger pills or Gravol just in case.
Congratulations on your belated honeymoon! I'm sure you'll have an excellent time. My biggest flying tip is to drink plenty of water - I always get soooo dehydrated. And make sure you have a sweater or little travel blanket, planes are usually cold (at least for me, I'm always cold though)!
I'm always cold too. Do they sell travel blankets? Can I bring water or get water on the plane? I try to drink a minimum of 16 ounces of water by 10 am, so hopefully I'll be fine. Just hope I don't have to pee until I can make it to our layover stop.
Thanks for the congratulations. When I say VERY belated, I'm talking 15 years belated.
You can't bring water (or any other liquid) through security, except the tiny travel size things (3oz) in a 1qt Ziploc bag. You CAN bring an empty water bottle though, and fill it once you're through.
They also serve drinks on the plane, so you can totally do that too. And airplane bathrooms aren't nearly as horrifying as they used to be, though I totally get waiting until you're on solid ground.
There are also shops and stores once you are through security that will allow you to purchase food/beverages which you can take on the plane.
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orangesmartie wrote: »lilaclovebird wrote: »Italian_Buju wrote: »I have to add that I think it is NOT selfish at all to realize you do not want children. What is selfish is to have children you do not want, just because you are 'supposed' to, and then treat them as such.
The whole point of my last post was that I really wanted to be a mother, I do not think my life would be complete without it, but, it is not for everyone, and should not be taken lightly, nor should be taken on because of pressure.
This made me feel awesome. I don't want kids. I just don't. I donate to children's charities occassionally and I would risk my own life to protect someone else's kid without a second thought*. But having my own is just not something I want.
*I actually have a problem with going to the grocery store and if a parent walks away from the cart, I will stand next to it until they come back. I know it creeps some people out, but it only takes a SECOND for a kidnapping to happen and I worry about that stuff.
I've never wanted children. I've always known that, since I was very young. I never played with dollies. I am not maternal in the slightest. I am very lazy. i want to have lie ins, and stay on the sofa drinking coffee, or chuck my passport in my handbag and just go to the airport (i've done that a few times, and once when i took my dog on a ferry to Spain and then drove across it). But generally, I don't like children, don't want to be around them.
When my younger sister was pregnant, I was really excited to be an Auntie. I planned to do all the cool auntie things, buy loud toys and have trips to the zoo. I was there when my nephew was born and fell in love with him from the first moment.
Unfortunately, my sister is an oxygen thief and a total waste of space. Social Services were involved all the way along (due to her age) and when my nephew was 6 months old, they removed him from her care and put him in the care of my mum. My mum and I share now share legal custody of him (he's 2 now) and she rarely sees him.
When i was working in Devon, he lived half the week with my parents and half the week with me. Now i work in London in the week, I drive 200 miles home every Thursday night. I do swimming with him and his class at school on a Friday morning, and he stays with me from Friday to Sunday, when i drive back to London. He is exhausting and I am having to learn patience, which is not easy, particularly when small children don't come naturally. My office/gym room is now a small boy's bedroom, (i was heartbroken to sell my treadmill. i still miss it) all decorated for him and full of toys. We've always bought things in pairs so he has one at grandma's house and one at Auntie's.
Here's my confession:
I resent my sister hugely for dropping this burden on me, and my mum. We were in the process of getting ready to emigrate to Spain and now that dream is gone. I have to organise my whole life around supporting my parents and ensuring they get a break, 2 year olds are hard work. My parents already raised 6 of us. My partners and I have to organise our weekends, holidays and social lives to take account of school holidays and having Charlie. I miss the peace and quiet of my house. I miss the tidiness. I'm generally a solitary creature and loved the solitude of my house.
My mum was also recently diagnosed with skin cancer and will be undergoing a major operation this summer before radiotherapy. The care burden for my nephew, and her while she is bed bound, falls on my dad, who also works. That means i need to be home every weekend to try and lighten that load as much as i can.
to be clear: I do not resent my nephew in any way. I absolutely adore him, he is my world and my priority. He is the reason i work 200 miles from home (i can earn better money in London, and can afford to ensure he has everything he needs, and nice trips to the zoo etc. He does bring me such joy and happiness and he is the total light of my life.
But, i cannot help missing my Saturday morning boxing class, or my sunday morning lie in. I miss being able to book a holiday without a thought about money or child care. I resent that i spend 6 hours of my weekend, every weekend, driving. I feel overwhelmed by responsibilities all the time. My whole life has changed, through choices i didn't make. (Not strictly true, because i chose to to fight for custody of him, with my mum, and i promised my mum i would help her and support her). Charlie being fostered/adopted outside of the family was never an option in my mind). And mostly, i feel selfish for these thoughts and resentments.
everyone always said I would feel different about having kids, if they were my own. I don't think i would. And i was never prepared to risk having a child, just to find out. Thats not fair on the kid. But now I've got one (sort of) and i need to be a parent to him. All I can do is my best. And he will never ever know how i feel about his mother, or the loss of my freedom and independence.
TL;DR if you know you don't want children, good for you, stick to your guns and don't let the earth mothers try and tell you differently.
ETA: Charlie was my reason and motivation for starting my weightloss journey in the beginning. I wanted to be able to run around after him and keep up with him. I didn't want him to be ashamed of his fat auntie and have other kids tease him about me. I also do challenges as a way of teaching him that you have to work hard for things, that its the effort that you put in that counts.
This is a wonderful story, and you are wonderful doing this for him. You are far from selfish. Resentment is natural and human, as you can see from others post I think sometimes even biological parents feel resentment toward their own kids! Sounds like you are an inspirational Aunt!0 -
nicsflyingcircus wrote: »berlynnwall wrote: »Caught up!
I'm not too worried about this parenting thing. I'm worried about the nitty, grittiness of sleep deprivation and exhaustion that comes with the early days, but beyond ensuring the kid's physical well-being, I feel like the actual 'parenting' part will be okay. I'm a decent person. My husband is a decent person. My parents were decent people and my siblings and I turned out fine. Not a lot of drama, not a lot of scares and we all put up with one another to varying degrees. Sure I expect there will be arguments and frustrations and bumps in the road, but I'm not aiming for perfection as I think that probably doesn't exist.
Am I being too blasé about the whole thing?!
Nah. I will say though that based on nothing but my time on pregnancy message boards (tip: do not go to a pregnancy message board, the craziest people spend all day there) most first babies seem to be easy. That's how they trick you into having another one. My oldest was the easiest baby in the world. I found myself thinking "why do people complain about this?". Five years later when I had my daughter, I found out how bad it could be. My daughter has also taught me to be a lot less judgmental about parenting styles. I parented her in the same general way as my son, and she is ?
I feel this exact way about my 4th child. She can be so sweet sometimes, but EVERYTHING is a damned battle with her. I cannot possibly convey how mule-obstinate she can be about the smallest things. It doesn't help that the older three (one of whom has to share a room with her) have figured out how to trigger her demon rages.
All her teachers love her though, so I am occasionally "grateful" she saves her insanity for her father and I mostly.
This is spot on my daughter too. My husband are always getting how sweet and polite and well behaved and helpful she is. That's awesome, FOR YOU. You should see her at home. Not helpful at all unless she feels like it which is almost never!
Yesterday I just want to punch her in the face. She was going to an end of the year school dance and changed into shorts. It was 50 degrees outside and I told her she'd freeze if she wore shorts. She said, "You've never been to one of our dances and I am always hot." I argued with her back and forth then finally said word for word, "FINE! Freeze your *kitten* off, I don't care! Get out of my house!" Yesterday was NOT the day to come at me. Not my best mommy moment, but I didn't feel bad either.
I did the exact same thing 2 days ago when my kids insisted on going to school in short sleeves and shorts when it was 60 degrees out. Whatever. They can be cold. Maybe they'll learn something.
Worst this year were Supernatural and the Flash. You just don't stop a season that way. It's rude.
So I'm under the weather again, totally exhausted, headache, throat bothering me again... 3 cups of coffee so far and seriously considering a 4th. Feeling guilty because I can't exercise again so I just know I'll be way over this week, because of course my appetite isn't going anywhere, I ate too much two days ago and we have an event on Sunday... but I've just been sitting in the recliner watching X Files (got to see it all before the next season in January!).
Uh oh, my daughter and I haven't gotten to the end of Supernatural yet. Sounds like were going to be frustrated. I bought it on amazon.com so we can watch whenever we want. Seems silly, but our schedules make it hard to watch weekly. And I kind of like binge watching.
Hope you feel better.
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Alatariel75 wrote: »pofoster21 wrote: »Susieq_1994 wrote: »
Agreed! Although I like the mint ice cream with bits of chocolate. And peanut butter with a bit of chocolate. Not a chocolate girl.
My old boyfriend used to make iced coffee with mint ice cream. It was really weird, but I couldn't fault it....
MMMM and mint hot chocolate. Fabulous. 0 -
I need to say something that will lighten the heavy feeling I have today. The weather is NOT helping either.
In just over 6 weeks, my husband and I will be jetting down to Florida for a VERY belated honeymoon. I could NOT be more excited if I tried. I am also extremely nervous and anxious about the whole thing. I really don't know what to expect and that's very thrilling and nerve wracking at the same time. I'm excited to wear my new swimsuit and sun hat I just bought this weekend. It's very chic. I just need to get some cute maxi dresses and a cute swimsuit cover up to wear on the beach. I could also use some helpful tips about traveling by plane.
Thanks!
Make sure you follow the airlines rules about what you can/can't take in your carry-on (and check to make sure your bag is an acceptable size). It'll suck if you have to throw out something when you're going through security! Be aware that belt buckles and sometimes underwire in bras can set off the metal detectors, so just something to think about while getting dressed that day I prefer to sleep on planes, so one of those wrap around neck pillows is a must for me, but I know some people can't sleep so you might not need one. Give yourself lots of time to get to the airport and through security. Check BEFORE you leave home if your flight is delayed/cancelled for some reason.
If you've never flown before and aren't sure how your stomach will handle it, pack some ginger pills or Gravol just in case.
ETA: Also, pack gum or chewy candy, something to chew while taking off & landing (for your ears). I actually wear ear plugs when I fly. They might not work for everyone, and it does say to take them out once you're at altitude, but I just wear them the whole time. It's a little annoying if you have to talk to someone since you can't tell how loud you're talking, but with them in my ears don't pop at all and it is wonderful.
WOW!!! @ShibaEars that was ALL very useful information. I do remember chewing gum on the plane and my ears are very sensitive to elevation changes so that's a must for me. I also have some Beats headphones so I'll be bringing them along too. I will make sure to dress comfortable with a wireless bra (probably workout out clothes since they're super comfortable) so I don't get pulled aside by the NSA.
My husband and I are going to sit down and make a list of all the stuff we need to buy, do and plan. Little tip about me...I LOVE LISTS!!! It's soothing to my mild OCD.
I love lists too. Crossing off each one makes me feel so accomplished. Plus I'm forgetful so I need lists. I always buy trashy magazines before flying. keeps me entertained. All the previous advice has been pretty good. Have a blast and relax!0 -
quiksylver296 wrote: »Daily confession.
My husband's daughter's boyfriend broke up with her on Mother's Day and she is "living" with us now. I put living in quotes because since last Tuesday, she's stayed the night once or twice, the rest of the nights (she works evenings) she doesn't bother coming home or even calling to say she's not going to be home. I understand she's an adult being 19, but I also expect her to show us some gratitude and respect for taking her and her cat in when she didn't really have anywhere else to go. Although, she must have SOMEWHERE to sleep since she's not sleeping in our house.
I am fully miffed about the whole thing because I feel like she is using us to store her stuff and take care of her cat. I have asked my husband to talk to her, but I'm sure he won't since he doesn't like confrontation and she's just now coming into our lives after not being allowed to see us for the past 14 years and he doesn't want to do anything to jeopardize that.
I am upset and hurt and don't know what to do.
Sounds like a contract is in order. She agrees to abide by certain rules of the house, or live somewhere else that doesn't have those rules. You agree to abide by certain rules (to make it feel even) like not going into her room without permission, etc. All parties sign the contract. Break the contract - find a new place to live.
That sounds like a great idea, @quiksylver296 but my husband would NEVER do that. He's too nice/non-confrontational. Update, she didn't come home last night either. That is at least the 4th night in a row. I don't know my husband has even heard from her since Saturday.
Do you know who she's staying with?
Nope. We haven't seen her for a week. We were out of town for the weekend so I really have no idea if she stayed at home or not. I'm not going to worry about it anymore. My husband knows how I feel so he can handle it.
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ddrhellbunny wrote: »kellienw335 wrote: »I need to say something that will lighten the heavy feeling I have today. The weather is NOT helping either.
In just over 6 weeks, my husband and I will be jetting down to Florida for a VERY belated honeymoon. I could NOT be more excited if I tried. I am also extremely nervous and anxious about the whole thing. I really don't know what to expect and that's very thrilling and nerve wracking at the same time. I'm excited to wear my new swimsuit and sun hat I just bought this weekend. It's very chic. I just need to get some cute maxi dresses and a cute swimsuit cover up to wear on the beach. I could also use some helpful tips about traveling by plane.
Thanks!
Make sure you follow the airlines rules about what you can/can't take in your carry-on (and check to make sure your bag is an acceptable size). It'll suck if you have to throw out something when you're going through security! Be aware that belt buckles and sometimes underwire in bras can set off the metal detectors, so just something to think about while getting dressed that day I prefer to sleep on planes, so one of those wrap around neck pillows is a must for me, but I know some people can't sleep so you might not need one. Give yourself lots of time to get to the airport and through security. Check BEFORE you leave home if your flight is delayed/cancelled for some reason.
If you've never flown before and aren't sure how your stomach will handle it, pack some ginger pills or Gravol just in case.
Congratulations on your belated honeymoon! I'm sure you'll have an excellent time. My biggest flying tip is to drink plenty of water - I always get soooo dehydrated. And make sure you have a sweater or little travel blanket, planes are usually cold (at least for me, I'm always cold though)!
I'm always cold too. Do they sell travel blankets? Can I bring water or get water on the plane? I try to drink a minimum of 16 ounces of water by 10 am, so hopefully I'll be fine. Just hope I don't have to pee until I can make it to our layover stop.
Thanks for the congratulations. When I say VERY belated, I'm talking 15 years belated.
RE: travel blankets - I always bring a light jacket or zip up hoodie so it's easy to take on and off. And I hope you have so much fun on your trip!
I ALWAYS carry a hoodie with me, but I will sure to have one that day for sure. Thanks!WestCoastJo82 wrote: »Ahh, my first MFP eaten post. @MoHousdon - go to the D terminal for shopping in Dallas and bring your own snacks (beverages purchased after security) was the basic jist of my message. Enjoy your flight and honeymoon!
Thanks, @WestCoastJo82 I will remember D terminal for "delightful shopping in Dallas!"
I usually travel with a large decorative scarf. It fold down to nothing and can be worn around the neck, draped as a shawl or used as a blanket if it is cold on the airplane.
I travel with dried fruit and nuts and instant oatmeal packets in my luggage and energy bars of my choice in my carry on. If you get delayed or things just take too long having food on hand can be a lifesaver. Once you pass through security go buy yourself a bottle of water. Have a great trip!
I am planning on bringing some Quest Bars in my carryon. I also have so travel mix that I got from the local candy store that would be perfect too. Thanks for the advice and the well wishes!
Just so you know if you do get a layover in Dallas (where I currently reside) Just be prepared for delays especially if you travel AA or US. They've been have some issues recently over here. ( I would know since my BF is a pilot for US) He always complains about the hour or two delays. So just make a note ;p I hope you have a fantastic trip!
I wasn't going to be negative, but since someone else brought it up: HATE the DFW airport. I mean, not the airport itself, but I have never once made a connecting flight there on time. Also, a 2 hr. layover there is not much because the airport is so large. If you want to shop at concourse D find out which concourse you land in and which you depart from and plan accordingly. It takes a while to get to each concourse. But, you'll still make your destination and you'll have a great time, I'm sure!
I fly to Dallas all the time, and I hate it too. NEVER get out of there on time. There are always delays if you leave in the PM.0 -
ddrhellbunny wrote: »kellienw335 wrote: »I need to say something that will lighten the heavy feeling I have today. The weather is NOT helping either.
In just over 6 weeks, my husband and I will be jetting down to Florida for a VERY belated honeymoon. I could NOT be more excited if I tried. I am also extremely nervous and anxious about the whole thing. I really don't know what to expect and that's very thrilling and nerve wracking at the same time. I'm excited to wear my new swimsuit and sun hat I just bought this weekend. It's very chic. I just need to get some cute maxi dresses and a cute swimsuit cover up to wear on the beach. I could also use some helpful tips about traveling by plane.
Thanks!
Make sure you follow the airlines rules about what you can/can't take in your carry-on (and check to make sure your bag is an acceptable size). It'll suck if you have to throw out something when you're going through security! Be aware that belt buckles and sometimes underwire in bras can set off the metal detectors, so just something to think about while getting dressed that day I prefer to sleep on planes, so one of those wrap around neck pillows is a must for me, but I know some people can't sleep so you might not need one. Give yourself lots of time to get to the airport and through security. Check BEFORE you leave home if your flight is delayed/cancelled for some reason.
If you've never flown before and aren't sure how your stomach will handle it, pack some ginger pills or Gravol just in case.
Congratulations on your belated honeymoon! I'm sure you'll have an excellent time. My biggest flying tip is to drink plenty of water - I always get soooo dehydrated. And make sure you have a sweater or little travel blanket, planes are usually cold (at least for me, I'm always cold though)!
I'm always cold too. Do they sell travel blankets? Can I bring water or get water on the plane? I try to drink a minimum of 16 ounces of water by 10 am, so hopefully I'll be fine. Just hope I don't have to pee until I can make it to our layover stop.
Thanks for the congratulations. When I say VERY belated, I'm talking 15 years belated.
RE: travel blankets - I always bring a light jacket or zip up hoodie so it's easy to take on and off. And I hope you have so much fun on your trip!
I ALWAYS carry a hoodie with me, but I will sure to have one that day for sure. Thanks!WestCoastJo82 wrote: »Ahh, my first MFP eaten post. @MoHousdon - go to the D terminal for shopping in Dallas and bring your own snacks (beverages purchased after security) was the basic jist of my message. Enjoy your flight and honeymoon!
Thanks, @WestCoastJo82 I will remember D terminal for "delightful shopping in Dallas!"
I usually travel with a large decorative scarf. It fold down to nothing and can be worn around the neck, draped as a shawl or used as a blanket if it is cold on the airplane.
I travel with dried fruit and nuts and instant oatmeal packets in my luggage and energy bars of my choice in my carry on. If you get delayed or things just take too long having food on hand can be a lifesaver. Once you pass through security go buy yourself a bottle of water. Have a great trip!
I am planning on bringing some Quest Bars in my carryon. I also have so travel mix that I got from the local candy store that would be perfect too. Thanks for the advice and the well wishes!
Just so you know if you do get a layover in Dallas (where I currently reside) Just be prepared for delays especially if you travel AA or US. They've been have some issues recently over here. ( I would know since my BF is a pilot for US) He always complains about the hour or two delays. So just make a note ;p I hope you have a fantastic trip!
That just means more shopping time, right?! Thanks for the heads up!
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nicsflyingcircus wrote: »berlynnwall wrote: »Caught up!
I'm not too worried about this parenting thing. I'm worried about the nitty, grittiness of sleep deprivation and exhaustion that comes with the early days, but beyond ensuring the kid's physical well-being, I feel like the actual 'parenting' part will be okay. I'm a decent person. My husband is a decent person. My parents were decent people and my siblings and I turned out fine. Not a lot of drama, not a lot of scares and we all put up with one another to varying degrees. Sure I expect there will be arguments and frustrations and bumps in the road, but I'm not aiming for perfection as I think that probably doesn't exist.
Am I being too blasé about the whole thing?!
Nah. I will say though that based on nothing but my time on pregnancy message boards (tip: do not go to a pregnancy message board, the craziest people spend all day there) most first babies seem to be easy. That's how they trick you into having another one. My oldest was the easiest baby in the world. I found myself thinking "why do people complain about this?". Five years later when I had my daughter, I found out how bad it could be. My daughter has also taught me to be a lot less judgmental about parenting styles. I parented her in the same general way as my son, and she is ?
I feel this exact way about my 4th child. She can be so sweet sometimes, but EVERYTHING is a damned battle with her. I cannot possibly convey how mule-obstinate she can be about the smallest things. It doesn't help that the older three (one of whom has to share a room with her) have figured out how to trigger her demon rages.
All her teachers love her though, so I am occasionally "grateful" she saves her insanity for her father and I mostly.
This is spot on my daughter too. My husband are always getting how sweet and polite and well behaved and helpful she is. That's awesome, FOR YOU. You should see her at home. Not helpful at all unless she feels like it which is almost never!
Yesterday I just want to punch her in the face. She was going to an end of the year school dance and changed into shorts. It was 50 degrees outside and I told her she'd freeze if she wore shorts. She said, "You've never been to one of our dances and I am always hot." I argued with her back and forth then finally said word for word, "FINE! Freeze your *kitten* off, I don't care! Get out of my house!" Yesterday was NOT the day to come at me. Not my best mommy moment, but I didn't feel bad either.
I did the exact same thing 2 days ago when my kids insisted on going to school in short sleeves and shorts when it was 60 degrees out. Whatever. They can be cold. Maybe they'll learn something.
Worst this year were Supernatural and the Flash. You just don't stop a season that way. It's rude.
So I'm under the weather again, totally exhausted, headache, throat bothering me again... 3 cups of coffee so far and seriously considering a 4th. Feeling guilty because I can't exercise again so I just know I'll be way over this week, because of course my appetite isn't going anywhere, I ate too much two days ago and we have an event on Sunday... but I've just been sitting in the recliner watching X Files (got to see it all before the next season in January!).
Was the season finale last night? I didn't watch but I'm hoping to catch up tonight.
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kellyjellybellyjelly wrote: »kellyjellybellyjelly wrote: »My only confession on here is that I have strictly went by the book! I have had a few drinks, but it was in my caloric intake, so it was ok. My only problem is that I am NOT eating back my burned calories for exercise! I know, that could be a bad thing! But with what I am eating during the day, I am not hungry for anything else! I am only 5 ft tall, and have a small bone structure. I have lost approx 30 lbs and need to lose 80 more. I am still new at this and need to know if I need to change anything in my profile! I am eating 1000 calories a day, MFP goal was 1000-1200. Since I had so much to lose, I have been hitting the 1000 mark. I have also upped my exercise to 2 hours a day doing continual dancing. No breaks! This is not my first time on the roller coaster weight loss thing! I have lost 100 lb at least 2 almost 3 times. I want this to be my last and make this my life change since I am 45. The smallest I have been was 118 lb. I wore a size 2 or 5 at the time. Sorry this "confession" turned into my life story! Any advice would be helpful
I know we're not supposed to judge posts, but please be kind to your body! Since you asked for advice then I would say to do it sustainably by eating a decent amount & exercising less or with breaks. Think of weight loss as a marathon & not a 100 yard dash. Also since you have more to lose you can get away with eating more & not starving yourself by eating around 1,000 calories. If you don't weigh your food you could be eating more than 1,000 calories & not realizing. My biggest suggestion would be to get a food scale & weigh in grams & ounces & to at least try to net 1,200.
I weigh EVERYTHING I eat I am very strict on myself about this. Do I need to update my profile any? MFP did put my caloric goal between 1000-1200, but I have lost 30lbs since starting, and exercising more.
Do you have any medical conditions that makes it hard at times to lose weight? I guess as long as you're eating at least 1,200 calories a day then you should be fine. The problem with eating less than that is you're not usually getting enough of your daily macro & micros & it makes it easier to binge when you eat more.
I did update my profile last night, and it did increase my caloric intake to 1200! Won't I gain weight if I am eating more?? Is that a stupid question? I am still gonna exercise 2 hours a day, dancing or walking. I am sorry if I am not understanding any of this!
How much more do you want to lose? Personally, I say be careful with the 2 hours/day of exercise. You could burn out or get an overuse injury. Then, if you are relying on that amount activity for weight loss and can't keep it up it could derail you. Focus on your calories accurately first. If that is in line with your goals then scale back the exercise. You also want to lose slowly if you have a lot to go so that you can try to avoid any excess skin. Give your body time to adapt to each pound being lost.
I have at least 80 more lbs to go! Thanks for the input 0 -
Confession: I want to go on a vacation with just my husband without the 5 and 7 year old. I am willing to let them stay with family for a few days. Not a month or anything, like a long weekend. My husband doesn't trust a sole on this earth with his kids so this won't happen. At least until my kids are out of the house. So I will get a kid free vacation in about 11 years if I'm lucky. This is sad to me because I think couples need time together, but I feel guilty too like he's the better parent because I'm ok with them being with other people for a few days and he won't have it. ok rambling over.
No, don't feel that way. He is not better than you; just has a differing opinion. I say absolutely do NOT wait that long for a child-free vacation! Hopefully he will change his mind soon. What about any of the kids friends and their parents? Does he trust any of them? We always had a surplus of family members to watch our kids (very grateful for that), but sometimes they'd like to stay with friends' families. Exposed them to different things, too. Good luck!
He trusts no one. Not my mom, my sister friends anything for longer than a few hours. I appreciate his love for our children of course, but ya gotta cut the cord or at least stretch it some.
We have talked about doing a Disney cruise where the kids would be at the kid stuff a lot. I think we may do that the end of this year so that's a start. But even then I can see him not wanting to be away from them for too long. Now we're talking about perfect strangers being in charge of our kids.
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ddrhellbunny wrote: »kellienw335 wrote: »I need to say something that will lighten the heavy feeling I have today. The weather is NOT helping either.
In just over 6 weeks, my husband and I will be jetting down to Florida for a VERY belated honeymoon. I could NOT be more excited if I tried. I am also extremely nervous and anxious about the whole thing. I really don't know what to expect and that's very thrilling and nerve wracking at the same time. I'm excited to wear my new swimsuit and sun hat I just bought this weekend. It's very chic. I just need to get some cute maxi dresses and a cute swimsuit cover up to wear on the beach. I could also use some helpful tips about traveling by plane.
Thanks!
Make sure you follow the airlines rules about what you can/can't take in your carry-on (and check to make sure your bag is an acceptable size). It'll suck if you have to throw out something when you're going through security! Be aware that belt buckles and sometimes underwire in bras can set off the metal detectors, so just something to think about while getting dressed that day I prefer to sleep on planes, so one of those wrap around neck pillows is a must for me, but I know some people can't sleep so you might not need one. Give yourself lots of time to get to the airport and through security. Check BEFORE you leave home if your flight is delayed/cancelled for some reason.
If you've never flown before and aren't sure how your stomach will handle it, pack some ginger pills or Gravol just in case.
Congratulations on your belated honeymoon! I'm sure you'll have an excellent time. My biggest flying tip is to drink plenty of water - I always get soooo dehydrated. And make sure you have a sweater or little travel blanket, planes are usually cold (at least for me, I'm always cold though)!
I'm always cold too. Do they sell travel blankets? Can I bring water or get water on the plane? I try to drink a minimum of 16 ounces of water by 10 am, so hopefully I'll be fine. Just hope I don't have to pee until I can make it to our layover stop.
Thanks for the congratulations. When I say VERY belated, I'm talking 15 years belated.
RE: travel blankets - I always bring a light jacket or zip up hoodie so it's easy to take on and off. And I hope you have so much fun on your trip!
I ALWAYS carry a hoodie with me, but I will sure to have one that day for sure. Thanks!WestCoastJo82 wrote: »Ahh, my first MFP eaten post. @MoHousdon - go to the D terminal for shopping in Dallas and bring your own snacks (beverages purchased after security) was the basic jist of my message. Enjoy your flight and honeymoon!
Thanks, @WestCoastJo82 I will remember D terminal for "delightful shopping in Dallas!"
I usually travel with a large decorative scarf. It fold down to nothing and can be worn around the neck, draped as a shawl or used as a blanket if it is cold on the airplane.
I travel with dried fruit and nuts and instant oatmeal packets in my luggage and energy bars of my choice in my carry on. If you get delayed or things just take too long having food on hand can be a lifesaver. Once you pass through security go buy yourself a bottle of water. Have a great trip!
I am planning on bringing some Quest Bars in my carryon. I also have so travel mix that I got from the local candy store that would be perfect too. Thanks for the advice and the well wishes!
Just so you know if you do get a layover in Dallas (where I currently reside) Just be prepared for delays especially if you travel AA or US. They've been have some issues recently over here. ( I would know since my BF is a pilot for US) He always complains about the hour or two delays. So just make a note ;p I hope you have a fantastic trip!
I wasn't going to be negative, but since someone else brought it up: HATE the DFW airport. I mean, not the airport itself, but I have never once made a connecting flight there on time. Also, a 2 hr. layover there is not much because the airport is so large. If you want to shop at concourse D find out which concourse you land in and which you depart from and plan accordingly. It takes a while to get to each concourse. But, you'll still make your destination and you'll have a great time, I'm sure!
I will try to have all my stuff mapped out way beforehand. As long as I make it to my resort in Siesta Key by 10:30 pm, I'll be fine. If not, guess we'll be sleeping in the rental car and paying for a night we don't get to sleep in the room.
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Heartisalonelyhunter wrote: »pofoster21 wrote: »HereWeGoAgain7 wrote: »pofoster21 wrote: »HereWeGoAgain7 wrote: »Heartisalonelyhunter wrote:Wow, I so admire you for stepping up to parent a child you never asked for. You clearly love him and have sacrificed so much for him. I have 4 kids under 10 ( soon to have number 5) but having them was my own choice and I have to deal with it, no matter how hard it can be (and some days I just want to lock myself in the bathroom with a bottle of vodka). I agree that no woman should feel pressured to have children if she doesn't want to. Just because you're born with a womb doesn't mean you're obligated to use it.
I cannot agree more with that statement. I am 29 years old and am sick and tired of hearing from doctors, friends, and my in-laws that I will change my mind about kids. I haven't wanted kids since I was 16 and my brother had his first daughter. I was basically raising the baby while he and his woman slept and partied until I moved out at 18. In fact one of my mandatory things on my dating profile when I met my husband. We still do not want children, five years later. We enjoy the freedom of not having children, both traveling and financially. My family has multiple hereditary issues that I don't want to pass onto an unsuspecting child, not to mention that I have horribly painful cysts when I do ovulate. However, every time I broach the subject of getting an ovariectomy to remove my right ovary (severe scarring from multiple cysts makes any ovulation on that side extremely painful) and my left tube tied the doctors repeatedly tell me I am too young to make that decision. So let me get this straight...at 18 I can vote, join the US military, marry, and have children, which are all decisions that affect me the rest of my life. But at almost 30 I am too young to decide on something so important as NOT wanting children?
However, members of his family have found out they cannot have children of their own. While this saddens me, because they truly want kids, I am tired of everyone on his side of the family getting on our case because we are potentially able to have children but are not willing too. The last time this came up they actually suggested that I donate eggs to them (since that is the only reason they cannon have kids).
*Sorry to vent my spleen on this but it truly does annoy me.
Edited to fix grammar and quotes.
I can't believe your family asked you to do this and I would find some new doctors. This is all your decision all the way. Especially at 30. I think you would know by now if you wanted to change your mind!
LOL I am active duty military for the US. Ergo, they get slightly more say on my body then I would like. Luckily 30 is the magic age, so I can start fighting in December (but I'm getting a three year birth control in July just incase). As far as the family members go, I just avoid them as much as possible and every time they bring it up tell them in a very flat voice that my eggs are not for donation.
Seriously. Eggs are 1/2 a child. You don't just go handing them out. Like donating blood or something.
Exactly. Plus harvesting a woman's eggs is a laborious process involving many shots, examinations and medical visits. It's not like you can just hand them over in a cup like men donors do.
Interesting. That I didn't know. I guess I never thought about it!0
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