Confession Time! ((ABSOLUTELY NO JUDGEMENT))

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  • nonoelmo
    nonoelmo Posts: 3,941 Member
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    I'm trying to get in shape to feel better about myself around women and to make someone else jealous. How is that for shallow?

    Feeling better about yourself is a great goal, not shallow at all. Making someone else jealous - meh - my guess is that by the time you get that point you will reach that goal but be so comfortable with yourself that you will not even care that you've done it. It will be a non-event as you've moved on. :smiley: Good luck.
  • nonoelmo
    nonoelmo Posts: 3,941 Member
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    I've been UNSUCCESSFUL in weight loss because of bad habits that seem too difficult to change. I eat when I am not hungry and eat based on emotional comfort vs eating because I need to. Far too often I may get up in the middle of the night, feeling hungry I'll eat a peanut butter and orange marmalade sandwich or something else.

    I looked at myself the other day and felt disgusted in how I look. For too many months I felt too apathetic to change <I won't say why publicly - only privately and in limited capacity as to why>. The other day it shocked me to feel I am the "fattest" at home, get called fat and even know I am the fattest among co-workers.

    What I am scared of most is failing, not loosing weight and my willpower only lasting a few days.
    We believe in you.

    You can not succeed at something that you are not willing to risk failing at and in fact success is just trying again each time you fail. You can do this, one baby step at a time. Choose one thing, one goal for today. Go easy on yourself and build on each little success.


    “The man who moves a mountain begins by carrying away small stones.”

    ― Confucius, Confucius: The Analects

    You can do this!!

  • Susieq_1994
    Susieq_1994 Posts: 5,361 Member
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    nonoelmo wrote: »
    ythannah wrote: »
    Today, my husband and I were sitting together on our respective laptops, when he suddenly looked up and demanded... "Define yourself!"

    ...I confess that the first two words that popped into my head and spilled out of my mouth were "Ugly. Fat."

    I also confess that this makes me sad. :'(

    Although I suspect that one of the first words I'd use to define myself is also "ugly", I'm now tasking you to come up with two POSITIVE attributes to replace those ones.

    Off the top of my head, mine would be "funny" (I promise, I constantly make people laugh IRL, probably not so evident on here) and "analytical".

    Ooh, that's a challenge! Umm, let me think... Positive attributes...

    My first would probably be that I automatically think the best of people. If someone didn't show up for a meeting or did something inconsiderate, I always think of what might have been going on in their circumstances first and make excuses for them to myself, rather than just getting angry that they didn't meet my expectations.

    My second... (Gosh, this is hard. X_X)... Umm... Does "I'm good at not offending people" count? Because, with confrontation being a major trigger for my anxiety, I'm pretty good at that. It doesn't sound particularly impressive, though...

    Confession: It took me ten minutes to come up with those.

    Happier confession: Due to some horrible financial circumstances growing up, I never got a high school diploma. After I got married, my husband paid for me to take the GED test. Well, I proudly proclaim that I received my diploma and transcripts in the mail today!

    Also, I scored in the 99th percentile on ALL subjects except one, which I scored in the 97th. :)

    I may be out of place here but I'll add them anyway about you.
    Humble and Smart and Kind and Sweet and Gentle

    Aww, thank you so much!! That's so kind of you. :)
  • nonoelmo
    nonoelmo Posts: 3,941 Member
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    pofoster21 wrote: »
    pofoster21 wrote: »
    Kalici wrote: »
    Today, my husband and I were sitting together on our respective laptops, when he suddenly looked up and demanded... "Define yourself!"

    ...I confess that the first two words that popped into my head and spilled out of my mouth were "Ugly. Fat."

    I also confess that this makes me sad. :'(


    Aww, we can be our own worst enemy sometimes. I know it is hard (I suffer from this myself), but try to be nicer to yourself. Also, if I were asked about you, judging from your comments I would have said compassionate, animal loving and kind.

    I completely agree with this and couldn't have said it better myself. I also want to know what his answer was...

    Well, he knows that I have a lot of self-esteem issues. :) He's done a lot of comforting while I sob and ask why he could love someone so ugly and useless as I am. He said it was sad. :)

    I am glad he is supportive but I have to wonder why your esteem is so low. You seem like a wonderful, kind, smart, loyal and dedicated person. You need to start thinking that way. No one can make you feel inferior or unworthy, only you can let yourself feel that way. And why??? What do you have to prove to anyone? Your life is your own. Be proud of those things you are happy with, celebrate them. And work on those things you want to work on. Be happy.


    Very well said!
  • nonoelmo
    nonoelmo Posts: 3,941 Member
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    MoHousdon wrote: »
    Sheesh. You all have been busy today. Lots of good stuff and some newbies.

    I went to the doctor to discover what I had feared. Strep. I wanted a few more days off work but not like this. I used my last PTO day today so tomorrow I have to use a vacation day. Sucks! My mom took me to the doctor and now she's cleaning my house. It's really nice being taken care of.

    I'm glad you are being taken care of and on the mend! Get all better soon.
  • kzzr
    kzzr Posts: 53 Member
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    Thank goodness for this thread! I feel a little better about my secret binging.

    Last Sunday I ate a chocolate jam donut for breakfast that was left over from the day befores binge that included an entire pack of CC's, a jar of salsa, a choc jam donut and 1ltr of creamy soda, damn it was good. And I don't log on those days because I'm too embarrassed.
  • cranor130
    cranor130 Posts: 65 Member
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    nonoelmo wrote: »
    I've been UNSUCCESSFUL in weight loss because of bad habits that seem too difficult to change. I eat when I am not hungry and eat based on emotional comfort vs eating because I need to. Far too often I may get up in the middle of the night, feeling hungry I'll eat a peanut butter and orange marmalade sandwich or something else.

    I looked at myself the other day and felt disgusted in how I look. For too many months I felt too apathetic to change <I won't say why publicly - only privately and in limited capacity as to why>. The other day it shocked me to feel I am the "fattest" at home, get called fat and even know I am the fattest among co-workers.

    What I am scared of most is failing, not loosing weight and my willpower only lasting a few days.
    We believe in you.

    You can not succeed at something that you are not willing to risk failing at and in fact success is just trying again each time you fail. You can do this, one baby step at a time. Choose one thing, one goal for today. Go easy on yourself and build on each little success.


    “The man who moves a mountain begins by carrying away small stones.”

    ― Confucius, Confucius: The Analects

    You can do this!!

    Be kind to yourself. Will power is a daily struggle for many of us, keep moving forward. You can do this!
  • nonoelmo
    nonoelmo Posts: 3,941 Member
    edited May 2015
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    Six or so weeks ago I mentioned my daughter and a potential ED. The follow up (first follow up) and nutritionist meeting were yesterday. She's gained a few lbs and that is what the doctor wanted. The nutritionist gave her some good information and what I like is that the nutritionist told her not to count calories or even think about it but to eat in a way (I don't remember the diagram but about 50% non starchy veggies, 25% fat/protein and 25% unprocessed grains/starchy veggies and this 25% is by the portion of food on the plate.) My daughter tried it for a meal yesterday and said it seemed to work, she didn't over eat and was satisfied. We also both have food intolerances. It appears my daughter is getting some cross contamination of wheat/gluten at her dad's house. She needs to be very careful in reading labels and such. She also *may* have a legitimate allergy to another food and may need to carry an epi pen. The blood work is at the lab. Nutritionist is also wanting daughter to keep a journal of what foods are eaten and results (mood/bloat/energy/etc) without any judgement, just curiosity.

    While she was going through this process of relearning to listen to her body (still in process) and be ok with putting on a pound or two of weight I didn't log. I just tried listening to my body etc. I did have a few big food days (holiday) but I'm holding steady on the weight I've lost. As I am within 4 - 5 pounds of my goal and as I am at a healthy weight I am happy with even a very slow downward trend - a pound every month or two is fine. Daughter is traveling for a little while so I'm logging again and may be more careful to maintain a deficit.

    Edited to take out a few details.
  • nonoelmo
    nonoelmo Posts: 3,941 Member
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    Two positive traits.
    (I need to limit them to two??) :wink:

    This is actually an exercise I started doing with some inner-city teen girls I volunteered with years ago. We'd go through the alphabet and list something we liked about ourselves for every letter of the alphabet. Try it.

    Ok. My two.

    1) Tenacious/Persistent (My grad-advisor told me I ride the fine line between persistence and pig-headed stubbornness.)
    2) Resilient - I am naturally optimistic and able to overcome setbacks, learn from my mistakes and failures, and move on to keep overcoming challenges
  • omnipotentmiku
    omnipotentmiku Posts: 107 Member
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    funjen1972 wrote: »
    I wear the same stinky workout clothes for several days without washing. Ewww gross, I know. Always change my socks though lol

    I actually do this too. Wear the same clothes for about three days. Cause if mom had to wash two sets of clothes, my work-out clothes and my actual clothes, on top of a pair of pajamas (which I also wear for about three days before putting them in the dirty clothes; but I feel that's less gross) I think she'd kill me. Plus, it's not like you're going to the gym to get clean and smell better anyways. I don't think this is bad or gross at all to be honest, so long as you shower after your workouts and all that.
  • Glinda1971
    Glinda1971 Posts: 2,328 Member
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    I confess that I love being on airplanes. There is just something truly amazing to me about it. I always want the window seat so I can stare out the window. My favorite time on a plane was when I left early in the morning, while it was dark and the full moon and stars were out. So breathtakingly beautiful.

    My brother got to fly a jet at his military academy and I am extremely jealous, though I would probably be nervous if I were ever actually given the chance to fly one. This jealousy partially comes from admiring and adoring astronauts and knowing that most of them were pilots before moving on to outer space. I would love to be an astronaut, but I don't think I'm cut out for the job. :tongue:

    Chris Hadfield's book, An Astronaut's Guide to Life on Earth, is amazing!

    My Dh and I went to one of his talks. Very interesting! He's the reason I had a Twitter account so I could follow him up there.

    I'm with you on the wanting to be an astronaut, but as a 44 year old non-scientist, non-pilot I think that ship has sailed.
  • ohgeeque
    ohgeeque Posts: 224 Member
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    I'm trying to get in shape to feel better about myself around women and to make someone else jealous. How is that for shallow?
    Meh, it is human. :)

  • ohgeeque
    ohgeeque Posts: 224 Member
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    bkhamill wrote: »
    ohgeeque wrote: »
    I've just booked a holiday to New York and I'm so excited to try all of the American foods and restaurants people post here that we don't get in the UK. I've been to Florida 3 times when I was in my teens but mostly we just lived off Denny's and Subway. This time I'm gonna take full advantage of the yummy foods. I need recommendations!

    For example I've never had Key lime pie and everyone raves on about it! I'm dying to try it. Now obviously I know you can get that here but I'm holding out as I imagine it's so much better in the USA!

    My elder son lives in Brooklyn and works in Manhattan, he is always trying new things. I'll ask him for some recommendations for you.

    My DOH! would recommend Carnegie Deli but only if you are keen on a pound of corned beef.

    Roxy Diner in the theater district in NYC has some pretty amazing cheesecake!

    A Sabrett's hotdog (dirty water dog) from a street vendor. A Nathan's hotdog but only at Coney Island, in Manhattan they're trash.
  • spamarie
    spamarie Posts: 2,825 Member
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    IAmTheGlue wrote: »
    Ugh...so bummed. I had my youngest son Sept 2014 and it was a horrible pregnancy (actually both of mine were but his was the worst), complete with severe Hyperemesis (basically you throw up 30-40-50x/day and break blood vessels in your face, damage your esophageal lining, etc.) I had a home health nurse come and give me IVs every other day because I literally couldn't eat or drink anything. I still threw up constantly, just not as much.

    It did serious damage to my teeth. Most of my enamel has worn off, teeth are rotted out, etc. I've been working on fixing my teeth since last Oct. We have spent $10k (seriously) just since March on root canals/crowns and we are TAPPED out. That was AFTER the $3k insurance covered. Our credit cards are maxed, savings is gone. Since Oct it's been 4 root canals/crowns, 8 fillings, 1 tooth pulled.

    I go in tonight to have the dentist check another tooth that I'm thinking he has to pull. Awesome. That'll be like another $400 :( Never mind the constant mouth soreness and losing pieces of the tooth.

    I'm OVER IT. I just want to scream/cry/hit things. I'm tired of constantly being in pain and being broke from it. It's not fair to my children that $ that could be used for their care is going to my stupid teeth :( I'm also mad that I'm 33 and having dental work done like I'm 50.

    I'm so sorry to hear that. :( I feel your pain. I have dental issues from an eating disorder when I was younger. It is never ending dental work and yeah, way over $30k from our pockets... ugh.

    I do hope that they get you fixed up soon and you are no longer in pain. :( Dental pain is the worst.

    OMG $30k I don't know how you haven't stroked out! I'm about to with the (relatively) smaller amount I've spent.

    I even went back to work 3 weeks ago and a large part of the reason was so I could have secondary dental insurance through my employer plus have income to pay the dental bills. How sad, right? I'm working to pay my dentist *sigh*

    This whole saga is terrifying! I feel for you and hope you (and your teeth!) are doing better soon. People always complain about the national health service in the UK, but this sort of story makes me truly thankful. Dental treatment is free for all pregnant women and a year after giving birth. They won't make your teeth pretty or white or super straight on the NHS, but they will fix all your root canels, cavities, etc. without bankrupting you. It's nice to have one less thing to worry about.
  • Morgaen73
    Morgaen73 Posts: 2,818 Member
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    Very few people know I write erotica lol
  • jorinya
    jorinya Posts: 933 Member
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    I can't wait to go home for the holidays and rub it in peoples face that I am not thinner than them. All the horrible comments they made about my weight will be thrown back at them without me having to say a word. Those that thought themselves thinner than me are now over twice my weight? Oh how the tables have turned!!
  • AngryViking1970
    AngryViking1970 Posts: 2,847 Member
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    ShibaEars wrote: »
    ShibaEars wrote: »
    m1xm0d3 wrote: »
    My cellphone decided to do a Peter Pan off my bicycle cell phone mount today. Landed face down in front of my tire and I ran over it. End result = cracked screen. So maaaad right now.

    Sorry. I know it's not funny, but it's kind of funny.

    Then you'll love this one: A few weeks ago, I was sitting on my exercise bike and I had my 7-inch tablet balanced on top of a little pocket (made for holding an iPod, so my tab wouldn't fit inside it) so I could watch Phineas and Ferb while exercising (I'm very mature, I know). I was putting on my earphones and accidentally jerked the wire. Result: The tab came flying towards my face, then went down and slammed into the frame of the exercise bike, bounced off like a rubber ball, flew two feet, and CRASHED into the floor.

    It looks like spiders built webs all over the screen now. ;)

    Oh, that's rough!

    ETA: oh, and I watch cartoons all the time :wink:

    Ugh, I would honestly cry if my Kindle bit the dust. And as for the cartoons, you've seen my avatar, right? LOL
  • IAmTheGlue
    IAmTheGlue Posts: 701 Member
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    spamarie wrote: »
    IAmTheGlue wrote: »
    Ugh...so bummed. I had my youngest son Sept 2014 and it was a horrible pregnancy (actually both of mine were but his was the worst), complete with severe Hyperemesis (basically you throw up 30-40-50x/day and break blood vessels in your face, damage your esophageal lining, etc.) I had a home health nurse come and give me IVs every other day because I literally couldn't eat or drink anything. I still threw up constantly, just not as much.

    It did serious damage to my teeth. Most of my enamel has worn off, teeth are rotted out, etc. I've been working on fixing my teeth since last Oct. We have spent $10k (seriously) just since March on root canals/crowns and we are TAPPED out. That was AFTER the $3k insurance covered. Our credit cards are maxed, savings is gone. Since Oct it's been 4 root canals/crowns, 8 fillings, 1 tooth pulled.

    I go in tonight to have the dentist check another tooth that I'm thinking he has to pull. Awesome. That'll be like another $400 :( Never mind the constant mouth soreness and losing pieces of the tooth.

    I'm OVER IT. I just want to scream/cry/hit things. I'm tired of constantly being in pain and being broke from it. It's not fair to my children that $ that could be used for their care is going to my stupid teeth :( I'm also mad that I'm 33 and having dental work done like I'm 50.

    I'm so sorry to hear that. :( I feel your pain. I have dental issues from an eating disorder when I was younger. It is never ending dental work and yeah, way over $30k from our pockets... ugh.

    I do hope that they get you fixed up soon and you are no longer in pain. :( Dental pain is the worst.

    OMG $30k I don't know how you haven't stroked out! I'm about to with the (relatively) smaller amount I've spent.

    I even went back to work 3 weeks ago and a large part of the reason was so I could have secondary dental insurance through my employer plus have income to pay the dental bills. How sad, right? I'm working to pay my dentist *sigh*

    This whole saga is terrifying! I feel for you and hope you (and your teeth!) are doing better soon. People always complain about the national health service in the UK, but this sort of story makes me truly thankful. Dental treatment is free for all pregnant women and a year after giving birth. They won't make your teeth pretty or white or super straight on the NHS, but they will fix all your root canels, cavities, etc. without bankrupting you. It's nice to have one less thing to worry about.

    Wow, that is an awesome benefit! I am in the US and we don't have anything like that.

    It is so expensive here. :(
  • spamarie
    spamarie Posts: 2,825 Member
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    I confess, I have to pee right now.

    Me too!
  • spamarie
    spamarie Posts: 2,825 Member
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    I confess, I have to pee right now.

    Me too!

    Great minds think alike.