Confession Time! ((ABSOLUTELY NO JUDGEMENT))
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Susieq_1994 wrote: »I confess... That I haven't ever made a really deep or meaningful confession here. Everyone else seems to relate to each other so much, and I feel like an outcast; in my mind, at least, I'm certain that if I were to make a deeper confession that would leave me vulnerable, I'd be targeted for bullying or judged harshly by everyone here.
I have to admit that I'm not sure how much sense I'm making, or if I'm making sense at all.
Does anyone else ever feel this way, or is it just the anxiety talking? I don't know that either!
You have talked about your anxiety here and I'm sure you don't share that with everyone. Not everyone makes groundbreaking confessions. Love it when you pop in and share your baking adventures! This place wouldn't be the same without you!0 -
jennojenno wrote: »FluffySandwich wrote: »I appreciate the comments about not being ashamed for being afraid to donate blood! I hope, somehow, that this fear will one day up and vanish. My mom said so many people were passing out all over the place when she went through medical school, but they stuck it out and now don't get phased in the slightest. I, however, am not currently planning on going through medical school!
For a confession, I got really really sick of craving chocolate all day. I made my way through two pots of tea (6 cups) and then decided to make a chocolate cake. It's currently sitting in the oven and I can't wait for it to be done. Problem's going to be limiting myself to one slice. I thought about freezing it, but then I remembered how I used to pull frozen cupcakes from the freezer and devour them. Guess I should really work on my self control.
Oh good luck. Me and chocolate cake = not a good idea.
Confession - I really stress out about special events. It sucks. I am completely torn between the 'enjoy it, it doesn't happen often' and the 'don't go crazy, you'll gain weight' mentality. Special events have always been about food for me and I just can't get out of that mindset. And I hate it because it stresses me out all week trying to bank calories for it and not necessarily succeeding.
Second confession - I'm really not sure I'll be one of the people who successfully maintain their weight loss because I'm just too obsessed with food and I can't always find the willpower I need to resist some foods anymore. Plus knowing that I will go over because of PMS every month gives me extra pressure to maintain a deficit the rest of the time, and it sucks. I'm honestly stressed out just thinking I'm going to have to live my life this way.
I have been feeling the exact same way. I have been backsliding for the last 2 months, I'm basically back to where I was in November. All because I suck at portion control.
Here's something that helped me with cravings.
First, you don't always need to deny yourself. Pre-plan what you're craving into your calories for the day.
Second, when you do eat the thing you're craving, stop doing everything else and pay. attention. to. it. Feel it on your tongue, really *taste* it -- how would you describe it to someone who's never had it? Bite and chew slowly and really take the time to savor it, don't just scarf it down while you're driving and at a red light or mindlessly munch in front of the TV. Treat yourself, just pay attention to it.
I feel like a lot of people have just gotten used to wolfing things down without really paying attention to it, and this is how they overeat.
That's good advice, thanks! I was thinking that I was going to start with 1 serving of whatever, eat it, and then make myself wait 5-10 minutes before I would allow myself to grab another serving. You know, to make sure I'm really still hungry for it. I like the idea of paying attention to what I'm eating to make sure I enjoy it.
Yep, those are both good ideas. Slowing down and being mindful of what we're eating really helps with the enjoyment of it and the smaller quantity. Also, getting a serving of something, putting the rest away, then eating the serving and waiting like you said helps a lot. Most of the time you'll find that 2nd portion isn't even needed. That's been my experience anyway.0 -
pofoster21 wrote: »Italian_Buju wrote: »pofoster21 wrote: »kelly_c_77 wrote: »pofoster21 wrote: »Italian_Buju wrote: »Italian_Buju wrote: »I am really upset this morning because my degu is dying, I am sure of it now.....he has almost completely stopped eating and now his fur is falling out.....I was up at 4am hand feeding him corn flakes but have to leave for work now and am terrified he is going to die by himself in his cage while I am not home....I can't stop crying......its gonna be a long day, or few days, every time I have to leave the house.....
That's just heartbreaking. I'm so sorry. Losing a pet, no matter how or when, is always so hard.
I have an indoor/outdoor (mostly outdoor) cat that I haven't seen in almost 2 weeks. We live in kind of a wooded area so I think an animal got him. I was thinking something happened last week when I didn't see him, but now that almost a whole week has passed and I still haven't seen him, I'm pretty sure he's gone for good. He was my boy and I'm sad I'll probably never get to hold him again.
So far my little guy is hanging on, but still not really eating anything but hand fed corn flakes.....
Sorry about your kitty!! That is so hard!
Glad your little guy is hanging in there. Maybe he just needs to serious TLC that only hand fed corn flakes can provide.
I was really struggling with Owen being gone yesterday. Every time I'd think about him, I'd bread down in tears. I hope he makes his way back home. That's him in my profile picture.
Aww... I am so sorry about your cat. That is why all my cats are 100% indoor, I am so paranoid. I am currently courting a feral all black cat on my porch that I have been feeding for about a year now...trying to get him inside eventually. Not that I need 4.
And speaking of 4... I have a fifth cat that I started feeding on my porch every day too... black and white. Totally friendly. I finally took him to the vet on Monday and he is microchipped! So we are tracking his owners, which I am sure they dumped him, so far we traced him to a shelter in TN, then he was adopted and taken to DE, then surrendered to a shelter near my home, so now we are trying to find out if the shelter readopted him out or if he somehow got free.
I had to let him loose again (wasn't spending hundreds on a cat that I had to hand over to someone else) and I can't have him in my home until he is tested for feline AIDS And leukemia. So still feeding him on the porch. I am worried something will happen before the vet agrees I can keep him and will treat him. So I may soon have 4 in house, and one on the porch. Then eventually maybe I'll get Porch Kitty into my condo. Then it will be 5. I basically have a Kitty Condo. I swore I would never have more than 3. I am becoming a crazy cat lady.
This sounds like my family! We have five cats...four were previously strays that we fed off of our porch. They warm up to us over time, we take them in and quarantine them in our basement away from our other cats until they get to the vet to be tested and checked for microchips. It always seems to work out...all the cats end up getting along great, and adjust to indoor-only life just fine!
yep, I had set up the spare bedroom for him on Monday, but didn't bring him in when I didn't get him tested after we found the microchip. The vet thought it was too risky. I may now though, he keeps begging me to come in (standing at my sliding glass door and crying, running out to meet me when I get home, etc.)
I would not be able to resist this....I would have ten thousand cats if they each did this, lol.
Yep hence the about to be 4.
So update on black and white kitty. Vet confirmed the trail is dead so I can bring him in and claim him. I have a 4 pm appt today. His last known owner surrendered him because they moved to Israel so I am hoping the spraying is not an issue. So unless he has a contagious disease he is about to be cat #4. I am going to decide on a name today. I am feeling guilty about my other 3 cats. I think they already think they don't get enough attention. Oh well. I'll just have to make sure I give each of them some time each day. The 3 I have figured it out and we settled into a routine. Hopefully this will work out.
That makes me happy. Is he a tuxedo kitty? That's what my Owen is and he was so handsome. Is handsome. Do you have name-names for your kitties or cat names for them? What I mean is, I don't give my pets animal names, I give them people names. Our dogs are Lucy and Otis, the guinea pigs were Ozzy and Jackson (my daughter was a HUGE Hannah Montana fan at the time), there's Owen, and I had a rabbit named Jessica. I think people names are more endearing for pets than animal names, IMHO.
I always find it so interesting what people name their pets! I've had pets with people names (i.e. my first dog was Sam), but my current pets have 'animal' names - my husky in the photo is Jazz, and my cats are Tadpole and Purranha (long story- started with a cat named Catfish because my dad waded into our creek to 'fish' her out!).
My mom almost always names her pets animal names, with two exceptions: she had a husky named Nikki when she was in high school/college, and a cat named Delilah for a while (yes, we then had Sam(pson) and Delilah in the same house!)0 -
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I spend Thursday nights at my SO's house. I get up at 5:00 am and drive home. I let the dogs out and I put on pajamas and sleep or snooze. My ex drops the kids off at 5:30 am. It's as if I was home all night.
He doesn't need to know
Also...I might have missed it but did you ever explain why you are wearing a gas mask in your profile pic? You don't need to explain, I'm just curious
It is not a secret or anything particularly exciting. I'm a chemist and if I work with certain chemicals outside a vented hood I put on a respirator and put a sign on the lab door so other people don't come in without one on. The chemicals that I am working with this week are toxic by inhalation. Plus one smells so bad it is known to make people vomit. It makes a safe product that doesn't smell.
Short answer is just a selfie at work. My SO gets a kick out of his badass "doctor of chemistry " girlfriend so I send him action shots sometimes. If I do something action shot worthy today's I will update it.
Impressive! Thanks for the explanation. I was wondering as well.0 -
noaddedsugarx wrote: »Ps. This thread has given me the biggest mint chocolate craving ever! I've just seen the new Quest bars are chocolate mint as well. I must have one ASAP!
I saw that too and ordered some a few days ago. I’m hoping they will be here soon!
Let me know what they're like! I don't think we're able to order them yet in the UK
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Alicias_Journey wrote: »After I dislocated my knee I've lost all motivation... I've eatten like CRAP for 2 full weeks & havent stepped on the scale at all... My 17 lb loss is probably only 7 now. I'm afraid of logging this pitfall...
I’m so sorry. I know how you feel. I have a meniscus tear in my right knee so I’m just now getting back to walking without as much pain now. Don’t give up because of the injury. I didn’t lose any weight the last three weeks because of it but this week I lost 3 lbs again because I’m still trying to eat better. Hang in there, take care of yourself and start over again when you are ready!
Definitely don't give up! I first started losing weight in 2013 after having torn my MCL in my right knee - I gained a lot of weight while I couldn't do anything and finally realized that it was out of control. I ended up losing 20 lbs during my 6 or so month recovery, and then continued to lose another 20. I reached my goal in 2014 and did great for a while, now I'm trying to get back down to my goal weight (I only have about 5 lbs to lose, just crept up higher than I'd like in maintenance!).
It was really hard work to stay motivated while hurt, but my physical therapist made the point that if I lost the weight, then full recovery would be easier because I'd be putting less strain on that knee everyday. And she was so right - I'm in better shape now than pre-injury by far! It was completely worth the hard work (and occasional tears)0 -
confession: i drink way too much. way, way too much. it's caused me a lot of issues over the past couple of years (i've wrecked my car, twice; cheated on my boyfriend, which destroyed the relationship), which you would think would slow down my consumption, but instead i'm just drinking more "carefully." for most people these would be the "life changing events" where they have a massive realization that they need to turn their lives around, then everything is a montage of hard work, making amends and going on oprah.
but i don't have that. and i'm not really sure why. i think some of it might be attributed to the prozac and welbutrin i take. i just mostly feel dead inside.
Does the doctor know you're drinking while you're on them? They would make a difference. I was given welbutrin as a hail mary for my migraines, and it made me the most apathetic person on earth.
My migraine hail mary is maxalt. The terrible tasting ones you dissolve in your mouth.
But yeah, she broke up with me, it was traumatizing to say the least.
Do then I just went to a regular dr, told him what I take and he wrote new scripts. If I really thought about it, it would be troubling
I'm so sorry for your experience. Sounds like your doctor that broke up with you was afraid of some lawsuit or malpractice situation. Can you find another? Do you have options? I worry about you.
no worries, it'll all be alright.
i don't really even think my sessions with her accomplished anything. actually, outside of killing my soul with medication (maybe only half joking there?) it was mostly like a check in on how the meds were going. Is everything ok? sure! ok cough up a co-pay, bye!
totally honest, now i just don't feel like wasting the money on it again....0 -
kellienw335 wrote: »Susieq_1994 wrote: »I confess... That I haven't ever made a really deep or meaningful confession here. Everyone else seems to relate to each other so much, and I feel like an outcast; in my mind, at least, I'm certain that if I were to make a deeper confession that would leave me vulnerable, I'd be targeted for bullying or judged harshly by everyone here.
I have to admit that I'm not sure how much sense I'm making, or if I'm making sense at all. Does anyone else ever feel this way, or is it just the anxiety talking? I don't know that either!
You have talked about your anxiety here and I'm sure you don't share that with everyone. Not everyone makes groundbreaking confessions. Love it when you pop in and share your baking adventures! This place wouldn't be the same without you!
Aww, thank you so much! That's true, I rarely talk about my anxiety with anyone--Pretty much only my husband knows the full details of what exactly is "wrong" with me and my main triggers, because I just can't talk about them. Typing it out is a lot easier than trying to speak, so I guess sharing it here with total strangers is easier than trying to hash it all out with family.
As for my baking adventures, you reminded me! Yesterday, I had a hankering for THICK, chewy chocolate chip cookies and went looking for a recipe. I followed it to the letter, but when my cookies came out of the oven, they were so flat that the chocolate chips looked like cancerous tumours poking out of their tops... Rather disappointing, but I actually found it quite hilarious. I was looking for one extreme and got the other...0 -
Yay! I'm finally caught up! Whew! I was in all day training yesterday.
There are so many things I wanted to respond to way back there, but I didn't want to look like a crazy person.
My CW's all thought I was going to wind up a crazy cat lady, but I showed them. Oh wait. I have 4 cats and a dog. I would totally have another cat if my husband didn't say no. LOL I mean, if a cat showed up, I'm sure he wouldn't turn it away, but I'm going to respect his "No" since he's the one that does all of the cleaning and litter box scooping.0 -
kellienw335 wrote: »Hard confession here cuz it just happened again...
I went to the Dollar Tree to grab 3-4 things best bought there. Was shopping fine enough, come time to checkout. A line out about 6 people deep with a ton of crap to buy and only one cashier checking people out.... Nope. No thanks. Not gonna happen. I dropped my hand basket in the center of the aisle where I stood and walked out. If you spend more time in line trying to pay for what you just shopped for then there is a problem with your practice! Yes, waiting is a part of living and in most cases there's no getting around it... The problem I have is not with the cashier doing their part so I never cut them a look or anything, I blame the business for insufficient staffing and I refuse to support them by making a purchase at that time.
We were shopping the other night at Wal-Mart (we were in a small town and it was the only thing open that had what we needed) and there was seriously 1 lane open. In the whole entire store. One freakin' lane! Luckily, we didn't have a whole basket full of stuff, but still, I thought it was ridiculous. I've left a cart somewhere because I didn't feel like waiting in line for 20 minutes.
I hate WalMart. Their official policy (here) is not to redirect or confront or scold people for having too many items in the express line.
I know this because I once went through express with ONE item while the woman in front of me had 38. Yes, I counted. I wanted to say something to her but it would have been something really b*tchy and I'm trying to be a nicer person. So I pointed out to the cashier that the customer had exceeded the posted item limit about three times over, and she advised me that they weren't allowed to say anything.
Nope, they aren't. People know this and abuse it.
Walmart.com is a godsend! Free shipping to my home for any orders over $50.00. I order almost all of my non-perishable foods, toiletries, household cleaners, etc. Then I go to a different grocery store only for my fruit, vegetables, dairy, etc. Haven't set foot in Walmart for almost a year and I intend to keep that streak growing.
That is such a good idea! You are a genius! I usually go to one grocery store for meat, veggies, dairy, and sale items and then go to Walmart for paper, cleaning, etc. Totally doing this next time!
It has made my life immensely easier! I just placed an order today for toilet paper, laundry detergent, canned goods, and tea bags. In a few days either FedEx or UPS will deliver it. It's great!
i stalk slicdeals.org for super deals on toiletries and household stuff. it's amazing how much you can save!!0 -
So, my last few confessions have been pretty negative thoughts about my weight and food. And this week my mom pretty much kicked my butt out of my state of denial. I'm displaying way too many symptoms of anorexia to the point I just can't deny it.
I am getting a lot of support from my family, and I am going to make efforts to seek medical help. I do have thoughts about lowering my calories even though I shouldn't. I do still think I'm overweight sometimes.
I'm kind of angry and annoyed with myself for letting myself get here and not exactly have the courage to eat more. I'm already thinking my goal weight (110 lbs @ 5'4") is 'too heavy' even though it's not.
Thanks for listening!0 -
krissyreminisce wrote: »So, my last few confessions have been pretty negative thoughts about my weight and food. And this week my mom pretty much kicked my butt out of my state of denial. I'm displaying way too many symptoms of anorexia to the point I just can't deny it.
I am getting a lot of support from my family, and I am going to make efforts to seek medical help. I do have thoughts about lowering my calories even though I shouldn't. I do still think I'm overweight sometimes.
I'm kind of angry and annoyed with myself for letting myself get here and not exactly have the courage to eat more. I'm already thinking my goal weight (110 lbs @ 5'4") is 'too heavy' even though it's not.
Thanks for listening!
Good for you for recognizing that something is wrong! You definitely don't look overweight from your photos, and 110 for someone 5'4" seems to be at the very low end of healthy. I hope that you can find a medical professional that can help - we're all rooting for you!0 -
I am still back on page 642. I have had entirely too much work the past couple of days to get caught up. I am off work tomorrow and have a ton going on, then we are off to a family reunion long weekend at my families ranch and I will not have phone or internet service on the ranch so unless I drive to town while there I may lose my login stretch, this pains me! I might just have to go for a drive everyday. I am not sure how I will ever catch up with this thread with that much time away though. I have to read each and every post so I won't miss anything! I am addicted to this thread! I may need to seek professional help for this
I, too am addicted to this thread. I tell myself everyday I won't go on here, but then I do. I spend countless work hours checking it and replying to it. I feel you people (what do you mean, YOU people?!) have helped me more than you'll ever know. I have found some friends on here that I feel like I know IRL and I cherish our friendship. Even if it is strictly online only.
I consider this free therapy and I feel free saying things here that I can't anywhere else. If I could hug each and everyone of you, I would. Even those of you that aren't into that sort of thing.
Ditto - 100%!0 -
quiksylver296 wrote: »asflatasapancake wrote: »asflatasapancake wrote: »quiksylver296 wrote: »asflatasapancake wrote: »I confess, I feel a poop coming on.
You're still slacking in the confessions department, Pancake.
I'm a very pure, innocent soul. Not much to confess.
That's not what you said a few pages ago! Spill it! And I don't mean what you just said in your previous post. That we don't need to hear about. Since you're still with us on this thread you might as well contribute something good!
Poop isn't good enough for you people? That usually knocks 'em dead most places. Tough crowd. Hmmm. Confessions, confessions, let me think...
I confess that my dad's a recovering alcoholic who got rid of all the pets I loved and my childhood home when I was younger because he needed to move to Florida to try and keep my mom from divorcing him. When he was down in Florida, I witnessed my dad have an alcoholic seizure in front of my girlfriend who was meeting my parents for the first time. That was quite a few years ago, so he is doing better now. Even though I love my dad, we don't talk very much because he lives with my mom in NC now. That makes me a little sad, and I probably still harbor anger and resentment towards him.
Good enough?
My father-in-law was an alcoholic, too. It messes up a family for sure.
You are officially a member of our group now.
As was my stepdad. A 12 pack every single day after work. A case a day on the weekend. Every weekend morning I remember the sound of a beer can popping open. Breakfast of champions, my azz!
My stepdad is an alcoholic too. He drinks as soon as he clocks out from work, all day on the weekends and pretty much any other time too. He has come to church functions, side jobs (he builds fences), birthday parties (kids), family gatherings, including Christmas morning, my 27th birthday party (where he called me a bit@h), and several other occasions drunk. He keeps a cooler of beer in my mom's car so he can drink while she drives. He ran into a bridge last week "because the sun was in his eyes", but I'm pretty sure that alcohol was involved. I refuse to let my daughter ride in the car with him while he's driving.
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krissyreminisce wrote: »So, my last few confessions have been pretty negative thoughts about my weight and food. And this week my mom pretty much kicked my butt out of my state of denial. I'm displaying way too many symptoms of anorexia to the point I just can't deny it.
I am getting a lot of support from my family, and I am going to make efforts to seek medical help. I do have thoughts about lowering my calories even though I shouldn't. I do still think I'm overweight sometimes.
I'm kind of angry and annoyed with myself for letting myself get here and not exactly have the courage to eat more. I'm already thinking my goal weight (110 lbs @ 5'4") is 'too heavy' even though it's not.
Thanks for listening!
Really, truly, this is great. I can't remember if you've already been down the ED path - (sorry!) - or if you're just veering that way for the first time, but if you can nip it in the bud before it gets to be any more full blown, you'll save yourself a lifetime of heartache. Because, trust me, once you hit that "goal weight" - it's never enough. You always think you can go lower, and it's such an exhausting and destructive mindset. Good for you for having support and being open with your family. You've totally got this.
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Susieq_1994 wrote: »I confess... That I haven't ever made a really deep or meaningful confession here. Everyone else seems to relate to each other so much, and I feel like an outcast; in my mind, at least, I'm certain that if I were to make a deeper confession that would leave me vulnerable, I'd be targeted for bullying or judged harshly by everyone here.
I have to admit that I'm not sure how much sense I'm making, or if I'm making sense at all. Does anyone else ever feel this way, or is it just the anxiety talking? I don't know that either!
I think you've shared a lot about yourself! In a good way. Say whatever you need or want to. We are not here to judge you. I think you are a valuable member of this thread!0 -
.You are welcome and you are safe here to confess or not as you prefer.
I'm inept at doing this on my phone. I hope @Susieq-1994 understood me.
I could tell it was directed at her, but I too cannot post very well from my phone. I can read, but not post. Well, effectively and with good grammar and punctuation.0 -
rungirl1973 wrote: »Confession: I want to go on a vacation with just my husband without the 5 and 7 year old. I am willing to let them stay with family for a few days. Not a month or anything, like a long weekend. My husband doesn't trust a sole on this earth with his kids so this won't happen. At least until my kids are out of the house. So I will get a kid free vacation in about 11 years if I'm lucky. This is sad to me because I think couples need time together, but I feel guilty too like he's the better parent because I'm ok with them being with other people for a few days and he won't have it. ok rambling over.
This is 100% not the case. Against popular opinion, your marriage has to come first. Without a solid foundation of love, trust, quality time and all that other equally important stuff, a marriage cannot grow. I'm sorry your husband doesn't trust anyone to take care of your kids for a few days so you can recharge your couple battery. I would maybe try talking to him and see if you can come to some sort of agreement or compromise. This is just my opinion and my husband doesn't feel this way at all, see previous posts, so you can completely ignore my advice if you want. I hope you don't have to wait 11+ years for your vacation though.
I agree with you 100%, as does my husband. Idk if you are a Christian, but biblically, the marriage relationship comes before the parent/child relationship as well...
I am! I was going to say that, but I didn't know how to word it exactly right.
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I'm having trouble reconciling the number of calories I'm eating (based on TDEE - SHOULD work for where I want to be!) and the number on the scale my body wants to settle at. My body is not cooperating and I don't like it. I hate that I care about that number so much.
Second, I bought two dresses online in different sizes. They fit pretty much the same, but the larger one fit *slightly* better. I almost went with the smaller one for vanity's sake, but I didn't. I hate that I had to choose the larger one, and I hate that I care. Who's ever going to see that number but me??
So basically, my confession is that I'm too caught up in numbers and I hate that I care. I work out every day, I eat mostly healthily, I'm on a 7 day streak of not going over on calories, the dress is cute and I love it - why isn't that enough??0 -
berlynnwall wrote: »I just saw my 4 year old slip a small cup into the cat's water dish and then drink it. It was so quick I didn't even have time to say something before it was over. Now I'm wondering how long he's been doing that. I just thought my cats were really thirsty, or that the heat was evaporating their water. Hmmm
Hahaha, that made me laugh out loud! Reminds me of the time we thought our cat was stealing treats out of the dog's container, only to find out that my little cousin had decided they tasted good! (they were tiny chewy apple flavored treats)
I went upstairs for a few minutes one morning and left my 3 year old downstairs while quietly playing with his toys. I yelled down a few times to make sure he was ok. Anyway, a few minutes later when I came back down, he immediately said, "I didn't just drink out of the cat's waterbowl". Suspicious? No, not at all...0 -
berlynnwall wrote: »I just saw my 4 year old slip a small cup into the cat's water dish and then drink it. It was so quick I didn't even have time to say something before it was over. Now I'm wondering how long he's been doing that. I just thought my cats were really thirsty, or that the heat was evaporating their water. Hmmm
Since he hasn't gotten sick from it perhaps it's actually helping him build an immune system! One time when my youngest son was about 2 yrs. old I walked into the living room and saw him dunking his toothbrush into the fish tank and brushing his teeth. He survived, thankfully.
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pofoster21 wrote: »pofoster21 wrote: »pofoster21 wrote: »xLoveLikeWinterx wrote: »lilaclovebird wrote: »
Parenting is so hard, I am taking every effort to never have to do it.
And think about it, parenting with TWO parents is hard... and single parents...woah. AND if everyone is working?!
Everyone else can go ahead and make successful and wonderful humans. I do not feel strong enough to partake in that endeavor.
ETA: I am serious about everything in this post. I see parenting as very difficult. It takes skills and abilities that I am pretty sure I do not possess.
Here's something I've never confessed IRL before...
I don't enjoy parenting. I don't think I was meant to be a mum.
Don't get me wrong, I love my boys with all my heart. I give all of myself to them to ensure they feel loved, are happy and healthy.
But I just don't think I was cut out for it. I've had pretty severe postnatal depression since my first was born 3 years ago and I'm sure that contributes, but I do wonder if its just my personality. Also, I carry a lot of guilt over my depression, its so unfair to them and I worry I'm messing up their whole lives
Aaaaaaaand now I want to cover my feelings in food.
I could've pretty much wrote this post, word for word. I have a 3.5 yr old and an 8 month old (both boys). Everyone tells me I'm an awesome mom, but I feel like I'm failing at it constantly. It's not effortless for me like everyone else I see on Facebook. I have to WORK at my patience.
To be fair, I'm pretty sure I have PPD and my 3.5 yr old is a DRAMA QUEEN and can be difficult, but still. I give everything I have in me to them, literally, and I still feel like I'm doing it wrong.
Part of my inability to keep the weight off is I eat my feelings at night alone when they're in bed, because I sit and relive my parenting failures for the day in my head, over and over.
And hi, I've lurked but decided to post in the thread today
Welcome to the thread! Please don't beat yourself up! We all do it. Many admissions and confessions regarding that here. It does you nor your children any good. Don't rehash the past. Just do your best every day. That's all your kids need. Do seek help for PPD because that is serious to deal with.
Also, the people who make self-promoting parenting posts on Facebook are liars. Ignore all that noise.
This made me laugh. That has to be the most judgmental thing you have ever said! (And I love it!)
It's okay to judge everyone else NOT on this thread, right? I thought those were the rules.
Totally and it wasn't even that judgmental, you are just the nicest/most supportive person on here that NEVER says anything negative.
Thank you and that makes me laugh. I think this thread must be my alter-ego or something because my husband and son call me negative and judgmental almost on a daily basis. Oops. Maybe I should pretend I'm typing something here before spouting off my mouth IRL?
My confession is I am way nicer in this forum than in real life.
Same!! Although I will say that since chatting with all you lovely folks, I am trying to be less judgmental in my every day life. You have all brought things to my attention that I never would've thought about on my own, so I try to see other people in a different light.0 -
I've decided that this weekend my oven is calling, I haven't baked since Christmas and I am in a mood. I think it's all this talk of baking and recipes, now the question is what should I bake. Suggestions?0
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I am still back on page 642. I have had entirely too much work the past couple of days to get caught up. I am off work tomorrow and have a ton going on, then we are off to a family reunion long weekend at my families ranch and I will not have phone or internet service on the ranch so unless I drive to town while there I may lose my login stretch, this pains me! I might just have to go for a drive everyday. I am not sure how I will ever catch up with this thread with that much time away though. I have to read each and every post so I won't miss anything! I am addicted to this thread! I may need to seek professional help for this
I, too am addicted to this thread. I tell myself everyday I won't go on here, but then I do. I spend countless work hours checking it and replying to it. I feel you people (what do you mean, YOU people?!) have helped me more than you'll ever know. I have found some friends on here that I feel like I know IRL and I cherish our friendship. Even if it is strictly online only.
I consider this free therapy and I feel free saying things here that I can't anywhere else. If I could hug each and everyone of you, I would. Even those of you that aren't into that sort of thing.
Same here...except I have only just started posting...but I have been following and keeping up since day one.
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pofoster21 wrote: »Italian_Buju wrote: »pofoster21 wrote: »kelly_c_77 wrote: »pofoster21 wrote: »Italian_Buju wrote: »Italian_Buju wrote: »I am really upset this morning because my degu is dying, I am sure of it now.....he has almost completely stopped eating and now his fur is falling out.....I was up at 4am hand feeding him corn flakes but have to leave for work now and am terrified he is going to die by himself in his cage while I am not home....I can't stop crying......its gonna be a long day, or few days, every time I have to leave the house.....
That's just heartbreaking. I'm so sorry. Losing a pet, no matter how or when, is always so hard.
I have an indoor/outdoor (mostly outdoor) cat that I haven't seen in almost 2 weeks. We live in kind of a wooded area so I think an animal got him. I was thinking something happened last week when I didn't see him, but now that almost a whole week has passed and I still haven't seen him, I'm pretty sure he's gone for good. He was my boy and I'm sad I'll probably never get to hold him again.
So far my little guy is hanging on, but still not really eating anything but hand fed corn flakes.....
Sorry about your kitty!! That is so hard!
Glad your little guy is hanging in there. Maybe he just needs to serious TLC that only hand fed corn flakes can provide.
I was really struggling with Owen being gone yesterday. Every time I'd think about him, I'd bread down in tears. I hope he makes his way back home. That's him in my profile picture.
Aww... I am so sorry about your cat. That is why all my cats are 100% indoor, I am so paranoid. I am currently courting a feral all black cat on my porch that I have been feeding for about a year now...trying to get him inside eventually. Not that I need 4.
And speaking of 4... I have a fifth cat that I started feeding on my porch every day too... black and white. Totally friendly. I finally took him to the vet on Monday and he is microchipped! So we are tracking his owners, which I am sure they dumped him, so far we traced him to a shelter in TN, then he was adopted and taken to DE, then surrendered to a shelter near my home, so now we are trying to find out if the shelter readopted him out or if he somehow got free.
I had to let him loose again (wasn't spending hundreds on a cat that I had to hand over to someone else) and I can't have him in my home until he is tested for feline AIDS And leukemia. So still feeding him on the porch. I am worried something will happen before the vet agrees I can keep him and will treat him. So I may soon have 4 in house, and one on the porch. Then eventually maybe I'll get Porch Kitty into my condo. Then it will be 5. I basically have a Kitty Condo. I swore I would never have more than 3. I am becoming a crazy cat lady.
This sounds like my family! We have five cats...four were previously strays that we fed off of our porch. They warm up to us over time, we take them in and quarantine them in our basement away from our other cats until they get to the vet to be tested and checked for microchips. It always seems to work out...all the cats end up getting along great, and adjust to indoor-only life just fine!
yep, I had set up the spare bedroom for him on Monday, but didn't bring him in when I didn't get him tested after we found the microchip. The vet thought it was too risky. I may now though, he keeps begging me to come in (standing at my sliding glass door and crying, running out to meet me when I get home, etc.)
I would not be able to resist this....I would have ten thousand cats if they each did this, lol.
Yep hence the about to be 4.
So update on black and white kitty. Vet confirmed the trail is dead so I can bring him in and claim him. I have a 4 pm appt today. His last known owner surrendered him because they moved to Israel so I am hoping the spraying is not an issue. So unless he has a contagious disease he is about to be cat #4. I am going to decide on a name today. I am feeling guilty about my other 3 cats. I think they already think they don't get enough attention. Oh well. I'll just have to make sure I give each of them some time each day. The 3 I have figured it out and we settled into a routine. Hopefully this will work out.
That makes me happy. Is he a tuxedo kitty? That's what my Owen is and he was so handsome. Is handsome. Do you have name-names for your kitties or cat names for them? What I mean is, I don't give my pets animal names, I give them people names. Our dogs are Lucy and Otis, the guinea pigs were Ozzy and Jackson (my daughter was a HUGE Hannah Montana fan at the time), there's Owen, and I had a rabbit named Jessica. I think people names are more endearing for pets than animal names, IMHO.
I always find it so interesting what people name their pets! I've had pets with people names (i.e. my first dog was Sam), but my current pets have 'animal' names - my husky in the photo is Jazz, and my cats are Tadpole and Purranha (long story- started with a cat named Catfish because my dad waded into our creek to 'fish' her out!).
My mom almost always names her pets animal names, with two exceptions: she had a husky named Nikki when she was in high school/college, and a cat named Delilah for a while (yes, we then had Sam(pson) and Delilah in the same house!)
So, my mastiff is Antigone Grace. People name or pet name? I love the name Antigone (Ann-tig-oh-nee for anyone wondering how to pronounce. Antigone is a Greek tragedy written by Sophocles.) I wanted to name a little girl Antigone if we had one, but had a boy. Grace because as a puppy, she wasn't. 0 -
kellienw335 wrote: »Hard confession here cuz it just happened again...
I went to the Dollar Tree to grab 3-4 things best bought there. Was shopping fine enough, come time to checkout. A line out about 6 people deep with a ton of crap to buy and only one cashier checking people out.... Nope. No thanks. Not gonna happen. I dropped my hand basket in the center of the aisle where I stood and walked out. If you spend more time in line trying to pay for what you just shopped for then there is a problem with your practice! Yes, waiting is a part of living and in most cases there's no getting around it... The problem I have is not with the cashier doing their part so I never cut them a look or anything, I blame the business for insufficient staffing and I refuse to support them by making a purchase at that time.
We were shopping the other night at Wal-Mart (we were in a small town and it was the only thing open that had what we needed) and there was seriously 1 lane open. In the whole entire store. One freakin' lane! Luckily, we didn't have a whole basket full of stuff, but still, I thought it was ridiculous. I've left a cart somewhere because I didn't feel like waiting in line for 20 minutes.
I hate WalMart. Their official policy (here) is not to redirect or confront or scold people for having too many items in the express line.
I know this because I once went through express with ONE item while the woman in front of me had 38. Yes, I counted. I wanted to say something to her but it would have been something really b*tchy and I'm trying to be a nicer person. So I pointed out to the cashier that the customer had exceeded the posted item limit about three times over, and she advised me that they weren't allowed to say anything.
Nope, they aren't. People know this and abuse it.
Walmart.com is a godsend! Free shipping to my home for any orders over $50.00. I order almost all of my non-perishable foods, toiletries, household cleaners, etc. Then I go to a different grocery store only for my fruit, vegetables, dairy, etc. Haven't set foot in Walmart for almost a year and I intend to keep that streak growing.
That is such a good idea! You are a genius! I usually go to one grocery store for meat, veggies, dairy, and sale items and then go to Walmart for paper, cleaning, etc. Totally doing this next time!
It has made my life immensely easier! I just placed an order today for toilet paper, laundry detergent, canned goods, and tea bags. In a few days either FedEx or UPS will deliver it. It's great!
i stalk slicdeals.org for super deals on toiletries and household stuff. it's amazing how much you can save!!
Oh yes, that is a good site to use. I used to use it but sometimes I get overwhelmed by too much stuff on the internet (silly, I know) so I narrow down my usage to just a few sites. Also, retailmenot.com is a good site.0 -
krissyreminisce wrote: »So, my last few confessions have been pretty negative thoughts about my weight and food. And this week my mom pretty much kicked my butt out of my state of denial. I'm displaying way too many symptoms of anorexia to the point I just can't deny it.
I am getting a lot of support from my family, and I am going to make efforts to seek medical help. I do have thoughts about lowering my calories even though I shouldn't. I do still think I'm overweight sometimes.
I'm kind of angry and annoyed with myself for letting myself get here and not exactly have the courage to eat more. I'm already thinking my goal weight (110 lbs @ 5'4") is 'too heavy' even though it's not.
Thanks for listening!
Really, truly, this is great. I can't remember if you've already been down the ED path - (sorry!) - or if you're just veering that way for the first time, but if you can nip it in the bud before it gets to be any more full blown, you'll save yourself a lifetime of heartache. Because, trust me, once you hit that "goal weight" - it's never enough. You always think you can go lower, and it's such an exhausting and destructive mindset. Good for you for having support and being open with your family. You've totally got this.
This is good advice, as is the others that have responded to you. Just keep working at it. You've made such a drastic change to yourself and that is fantastic! I've personally found though that once you reach maintenance it's weird to know that you won't really be seeing body changes anymore. Not drastically like before, which can make you still want to be on the "losing track". Instead, I've turned to weights and try to see muscle definition. That is indeed a slow process, but sometimes any little change helps!0 -
asflatasapancake wrote: »asflatasapancake wrote: »I confess, I feel a poop coming on.
When we were potty training our daughter, and she would have to go to the bathroom, she'd say, "My poop is coming!" My husband and I still laugh about that.
That is a story that we plan sharing with her future husband.
That's awesome! My daughter is almost 6 now, but she insists on telling us that she has to go to the bathroom at home. We're just like "Go, go". She also calls me a poop face and thinks it's funny. I think it's funny. It never gets old.
We also enjoy the term, "poop face". We also say poop on a stick, and crap a lot. We're a very poop friendly family.
Ours is just butts. If he's not moving fast enough when he's supposed to do something, we yell, "butt kicking for goodness!" and he knows to get moving. Or he used to. Now he just turns around and gives us the Finding Nemo "he touched the butt" whisper after we kick his butt.
Your kid is awesome0 -
quiksylver296 wrote: »asflatasapancake wrote: »asflatasapancake wrote: »quiksylver296 wrote: »asflatasapancake wrote: »I confess, I feel a poop coming on.
You're still slacking in the confessions department, Pancake.
I'm a very pure, innocent soul. Not much to confess.
That's not what you said a few pages ago! Spill it! And I don't mean what you just said in your previous post. That we don't need to hear about. Since you're still with us on this thread you might as well contribute something good!
Poop isn't good enough for you people? That usually knocks 'em dead most places. Tough crowd. Hmmm. Confessions, confessions, let me think...
I confess that my dad's a recovering alcoholic who got rid of all the pets I loved and my childhood home when I was younger because he needed to move to Florida to try and keep my mom from divorcing him. When he was down in Florida, I witnessed my dad have an alcoholic seizure in front of my girlfriend who was meeting my parents for the first time. That was quite a few years ago, so he is doing better now. Even though I love my dad, we don't talk very much because he lives with my mom in NC now. That makes me a little sad, and I probably still harbor anger and resentment towards him.
Good enough?
My father-in-law was an alcoholic, too. It messes up a family for sure.
You are officially a member of our group now.
As was my stepdad. A 12 pack every single day after work. A case a day on the weekend. Every weekend morning I remember the sound of a beer can popping open. Breakfast of champions, my azz!
My stepdad is an alcoholic too. He drinks as soon as he clocks out from work, all day on the weekends and pretty much any other time too. He has come to church functions, side jobs (he builds fences), birthday parties (kids), family gatherings, including Christmas morning, my 27th birthday party (where he called me a bit@h), and several other occasions drunk. He keeps a cooler of beer in my mom's car so he can drink while she drives. He ran into a bride last week "because the sun was in his eyes", but I'm pretty sure that alcohol was involved. I refuse to let my daughter ride in the car with him while he's driving.
I hope that's a typo for 'bridge'?!?0
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