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fat mans prayer
This is posted in my profile, I get alot of pm's about it...thought i'd post it Lord, my soul is ripped with riot Incited by my wicked diet. "We are what we eat," said a wise old man, Lord, if that's true, I'm a garbage can. To rise on Judgment Day, it's plain, With my present weight, I'll need a crane. So grant me…
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Tonight's the Night!!
For the contuation of the Biggest Loser! Did Mikey do it? Did he lose the 10lbs? Did we wait an entire week just to watch him be disappointed? I certainly hope he lost the 10lbs + some!!!! I thought that was awsome what he did last week for Aubry. I haven't even seen any pre-veiws for the show. I can't wait. Thoughts???…
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Nordakota Cow... (Warning pretty tastelesss)
Nordakota Cow... Ole is a farmer in Minnesota . He is in need of a new milk cow and hears about a nice one for sale over in Nordakota (that would be North Dakota for you non-Scandahoovians out there). He drives to Nordakota, finds the farm and looks at the cow. He reaches under to see if the cow gives milk. When he grabs a…
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Anyone else use Verizon Wireless? Anyone else notice...
That Verizon didn't change the time on your phone yet? I was surprised, they've always done it on the dot before. Of course, it's 7:30 here, so maybe by the time you all read this they'll have figured it out....:huh:
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A Nifty Tool for Ladies!
http://www.mon.thly.info/ A very cute, simple sight to keep track of your menstrual cycles! YAH! haha, I guess you have to find something positive about it :smile: It's great because you can keep track of your history and it will send you monthly reminders of when TOM is on it's way! However, you do have to start off by…
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leather dress
Did You Know This About Leather Dresses? Do you know that when a woman wears a leather dress, a man's heart beats quicker, his throat gets dry, he gets weak in the knees, and he begins to think irrationally??? Ever wonder why? It's because she smells like a new golf bag! :laugh:
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Acne?
Do you guys know anything about food sensitivities and acne? Is it true dairy products are more likely to cause breakouts? I have been breaking out very badly in the last few weeks, and I've struggled with body acne (shoulders) since I was a teenager. It was considerably better when I was on birth control, and I suppose I…
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DON'T FORGET..SET CLOCK AHEAD 90 MINUTES
oops 60 minutes let Spring Begin
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Funny little joke!
Grandmas don't know everything... Little Tony was 7 years old and was staying with his grandmother for a few days. He'd been playing outside with the other kids for a while when he came into the house and asked her, 'Grandma, what's that called when two people sleep in the same room and one is on top of the other?' She was…
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*****OLOGY ! I love this and agree
:devil: *****OLOGY :devil: When I stand up for myself and my beliefs, they call me a *****. When I stand up for those I love, they call me a *****. When I speak my mind, think my own thoughts or do things my own way, they call me a *****. Being a ***** means I won't compromise what's in my heart. It means I live my life MY…
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HA HA HA
GOOD: A Seattle, WA policeman had a perfect spot to watch for speeders, but wasn't getting many. Then he discovered the problem - A 12- year-old boy was standing up the road with a hand painted sign, which read 'RADAR TRAP AHEAD'. The officer also found the boy had an accomplice who was down the road with a sign reading…
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woman's and man's poem....
A WOMAN'S POEM: Before I lay me down to sleep, I pray for a man, who's not a creep, One who's handsome, smart and strong. One who loves to listen long, One who thinks before he speaks, One who'll call, not wait for weeks. I pray he's gainfully employed, when I spend his cash, won't be annoyed. Pulls out my chair and opens…
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BOOO Fitness On Demand!
holy bajeezus. I just discovered Fitness on Demand. *dies*
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One year ago today...
...I walked out of a meeting to find two secretaries hovered over a computer. When I asked what they were doing, they introduced me to MFP. I have struggled with unhealthy eating habits for a very long time and that day literally changed my life. While I’m still not at my goal weight, I am forever grateful for Mike, who…
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getting the day started properly
with a bit of humor- A blonde is terribly overweight, so her doctor puts her on a diet. "I want you to eat regularly for two days, then skip a day, and repeat this procedure for two weeks. The next time I see you, you'll have lost at least five pounds." When the blonde returns, she's lost nearly 20 pounds. "Why, that's…
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I'm pretty sure I will set this scale on fire.
ignore por favor...
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Funny weight loss joke! =]..gotta love men!
Weight Loss Program A fellow was reading the paper one day lamenting the fact that his doctor has ordered him to lose 75 pounds. Next thing he sees is an advertisement for a guaranteed weight loss program. He's skeptical, but says to himself, "Let's see what they can do." He calls them on the phone and subscribes to the 3…
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Dating! Tell me your stories!
So I've never properly dated in my life. I've had relationships but each one was unconventional (long distance, no proper outings (dinner, movies, etc), long distance, and even one where I never even MET the guy in person! haha). Just recently, for the first time, I've ended up in a very conventional dating situation and…
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OT teens *rolls eyes*
i have a 13 y/o almost 14 who thinks she is the coolest thing on the face of this planet. She is pretty and popular but..... she doesnt want to be at school... yup she is way too cool for school!!! How do you make them want to be there? She is failing a bunch of classes and has the "what ever"(roll eyes here) attitide!!!…
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Joke
YEARLY MEDICAL I went to the doctor for my yearly physical. The nurse starts with certain basics. How much do you weigh?' she asks. "135" I say. The nurse puts me on the scale. It turns out my weight is 190. The nurse asks, 'Your height?' "5 foot 8," I say. The nurse checks and sees that I only measure 5'2. She then takes…
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OT: Wedding Cake toppers opinions needed : )
Whattaya think? :bigsmile: Just kidding :bigsmile: But seriously, here's some links(too much room to put in the actual pics) to the ones I like. Let's take a vote :smokin: Which is your favorite out of these? Or do you have any others you like? (shoot, didn't show up as links will have to copy paste :frown: I know that's a…
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I'm leaving...
to Puerto Rico!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: Tomorrow morning...please do not feel sorry for me.:cry: :brokenheart: I will be ok. :laugh: I will try to be good...:wink: That is home for me. I can't wait to see my parents, especially my dad. Some of you might remember that he had a quadruple bypass in Dec. I…
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Honesty When Selling Your House
Well, this person sure does believe in full disclosure :bigsmile:
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How do YOU pronounce...
Hummus? Yeah...I'm obsessed with it since yesterday!:laugh:
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Weekends are the Devil
Are they not?
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Shallow Much??
so ill admit recently ive been into the whole bar hoppin and clubbin scene i go to wait in line with my friends the bouncer will walk up and tell me that i can have VIP and dont deserve to wait in back of lines and me and my girls walk right inside my friends are the same friends ive always had...and always will that never…
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Joke: A Frog Goes into a Bank
A frog goes into a bank and approaches the clerk. He can see from her nameplate that her name is Patricia Whack. 'Miss Whack, I'd like to get a £30,000 loan to take a holiday.' Patty looks at the frog in disbelief and asks his name. The frog says his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger, and that it's okay, he…
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Started a New Blog!
Hello, i started another blog... this one is mostly feature my creative/writing projects, but i would be happy if you would check it out anyhow! some good reads in there: www.justplainlindsay.ca have fun!
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Banks???
Is he stillllllllllllllllllllllll gone? Anyone? Steve? Anyone? HellOooOoooO? And what about my BFF Ty? Anyone HellOooOOO?